The price we pay for living
by Nat z29
Summary: Not always the best intentions give the best results, and a hurt G is going to learn it the hard way. The danger is not over, but a series of misunderstandings put in jeopardy Callen and Sam's friendship and in a precarious balance the work at the unit.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I'm just borrowing the characters to have fun, they are not mine and I promise to leave them alone at the end of the story.

A.N.: It's been a while since my first and last story, but the end of season 8 compelled me to try my own version of the following days of the life of the N.C.I.S. L.A. team.

+++++Contains spoilers+++++ Please feel free to correct any mistakes (English is not my first language). I hope you'll enjoy it!

Chapter 1

\- "Agent Callen."

Eyes closed, shoulder rested against the wall of the coroner office, G seemed oblivious to the call. The buzzing of his ears was competing with the headache installed once the adrenaline level started to fade out of his system, but both were far from winning the contest that the shooting pain on his back was determined to conquer. Sam's big hug before leaving, involuntary helped it to gain some points of advantage.

\- "Agent Callen!"- Repeated Murphy -"Hey Callen!"- said the agent touching this time Callen's arm.

\- "Yeah, Murphy, sorry. What's up?"- answered a startled Callen rubbing his face with a hand.

\- "Are you ok, man?"

\- "I'm good. What can I do for you?"

\- "What do you want us to do? I mean, now that all this shit is over, can I dismiss the teams?"

\- "No, no, not everybody. This is not over yet. I mean, Khaled is dead, but we know he was working with someone and we can't afford more mistakes. I need a guard permanently with Mrs. Hanna's body. N.C.I.S., not L.A.P.D. this time. Choose four people and make them to rotate each three hours for the next twelve; then choose another four. If anything happens I want to be the first one to know, and under no circumstances, nobody, I repeat nobody, must contact Agent Hanna. I made myself clear?"- asked G more abrupt than pretended.

\- "Crystal clear"- sighed the agent.

\- "Go home Murphy."-Added Callen softly closing his eyes for one second-"Kiss your wife and the baby. This is being a hell for all of us."

\- "I'll pick the team and I'll be doing the first turn. For Sam. For his family and for mine."

\- "Thank you, Murph, I appreciate it."

Making sure his balance wasn't going to betray him, G moved away from the wall. He needed to start working if he wanted to prepare the burial for the next day as Sam wished. The last words Michelle addressed to him were a pleading to take care of the big guy, and he was determined to fulfill his promise. Without any idea of the hour of the day he looked at the watch on his wrist, the one that the Hanna family gave him as a present the first Christmas they spent together, but, surprised, he only saw a mess of torn metal still attached to the strap and he noticed for the first time a wound on his wrist and some cuts on his forearm. As he quickly checked, the phone on his pocket had suffered the same fate than his watch and when he touched his ear looking for the earpiece he only found a scab of dried blood on it. Great. No GPS and uncommunicated. Well, at least he made sure a paramedic checked on Sam during the flight he arranged for him to the safe house.

\- "Callen"-called a familiar female voice behind him.

\- "Rose. Thank you for coming."

\- "I'm so sorry, I've come back the moment I knew. How is Sam?"

\- "He's on his way to see the kids."

\- "Oh! Poor things! Wait, is this blood? - She asked signaling a trickle on the side of his hand – "Are you hurt?"

\- "It's nothing, really."- He knew none of the injuries were serious, each had stopped bleeding, although bruises and scabbing would appear soon.

\- "Let me have a look and we can discuss what I can do for you."

Without energy to argue, G followed Rose to one of the autopsy rooms and, as directed by the pathologist, he took the jacket off, rolled the sleeve up, sat at the stool and extended his left arm on the gurney trying not to think on the previous occupant. Gathering some instruments, gauzes and alcohol Rose put sterile gloves on and began to disinfect the wounds.

\- "Sorry," – she apologized when G flinched at the sting- "not that we get many complaints around here. My patients don't need an antiseptic solution and alcohol is the only thing I have. I'd rather not ask how you got all these cuts."

Straight to the point Callen asked:

\- "Rose, is there any possibility we can skip the autopsy? We know the cause of death and the killer is also dead, so…"

\- "I'm sorry Callen, but you know that an autopsy is the standard procedure in a violent crime. Even in a case like this one we can discover important details."

\- "Believe me when I tell you that nobody wants to know more details. We saw Michelle die, for God's sake! And Sam was hoping to bury her tomorrow"- added Callen raising his voice involuntarily and retiring his arm from the metallic table.

\- "Callen, please…"- said Rose taking G's hand on her gloved ones-"I'll ask for some favors and I can start working on her right now. I promise you that my report will be ready first thing in the morning."

\- "What if… what if her kids want to see her, you know, to say goodbye. An autopsy…"

\- "No, no. I know what you're thinking. After the autopsy the body will be… how to say it?... presentable. Then the people of the funeral home can do miracles with make-up and all the stuff they use. The body will be nice and dressed to be buried tomorrow in the afternoon if you talk with the right persons."

\- "Ok, I believe you. Do your best."- said Callen standing. Rose nonchalant conversation about cadavers was more than he could take. He needed to get out of there before getting sick.

\- "Please Rose, let me know when you finish. Second thought, I'll call you, my phone is dead. Sorry, bad choice of words. And thank you for this." – he added rolling his sleeve down and running out the room.

\- "But Callen… your wrist! I've not finished!" – shouted Rose.

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The first thing that took Nell aback when she entered in ops was the unusual silence. Nobody was there, but the agent's tracker was activated on the big screen. Eric! She thought alarmed, and quickly drew her weapon suddenly alert.

\- "You can holster your gun, Miss Jones." – Ordered Hetty who appeared from apparently nowhere.

\- "Hetty, you scared me!"- Exclaimed Nell securing the weapon as fast as she could.

\- "Last thing I wanted, my dear."

\- "What are you doing in here? Where is everybody?"

\- "I dismissed the teams and we're ruling with the minimum staff, but if for "everybody" you mean Mr. Beale, he is sleeping on the couch downstairs. I'm afraid he is not ready to appreciate my 30 years scotch."

\- "And you have the tracker on because…"

\- "Just making sure that everybody is safe."- Added Hetty signaling two little points together on the screen with the tags of Kensi and Deeks on them.–"I'm afraid I can't locate Mr. Hanna or Mr. Callen."

\- "Last time I saw them Callen was driving Sam to the morgue. He is taking care of him, Hetty. They were fine, all things considered. Today I… I don't know what would have happened if Callen didn't stop Sam… he was so out of his wits… I was even afraid he could hurt him… and then the explosion… it's just a miracle they've survived." – Nell suppressed a sob.

\- "Come here." – Invited Hetty opening her arms and hugging tight her agent. – "You did well today, Nell. Under the worst circumstances you managed to control your emotions, the situation, and you were able to help your team members in the field. Now you can let it go, it's time for you to cry. Go downstairs, take your partner with you, and return home. I don't want to see both of you in here until further notice."

\- "Thank you Hetty."- Said Nell wiping the tears of her face while she went out the operations center.

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Alone on the private flight that was taking him to the safe house where his kids were secured, Sam watched the beautiful sunset over L.A. A paramedic had just finished tending his wounds, some bruises, scratches mostly that needed to be disinfected, but once he applied an antibiotic shot, he retired to the cockpit discretely, leaving Sam dealing one-to-one with his thoughts and feelings. His physical pain was nothing compared with the one that was tearing his heart apart.

"How could this had happened? …Why Michelle, why her and not me?... What I've done?...What will my family become?…What I'm going to tell the kids? How I'm going to tell them anyway? Oh my little one. My baby girl without her mum…This is not fair! Oh God! Aiden's birthday… and Michelle's family… her mum, her sister…

The landscape on the other side of the window turned blurred. He was crying. For the first time since this nightmare started he was letting his emotions to flow out. He knew that he needed to find strength, that he can't afford to lose it in front of his kids. But the realization of Michelle's death made the pain overwhelming. And he cried, he cried with all his soul for the lost love, for him and for his family. He cried feeling all the sorrow of the world upon his shoulders. He was still crying when the night fell and the landscape turned black, just as black as he felt his soul.


	2. Chapter 2

A.N.: Thank you for the reviews, I appreciate your feedback! I'll try to update everyday, just let you know that this story has a life on its own and a special rhythm. I hope you like it. This is a Densi chapter, don't worry Callen is coming back very soon!

Chapter 2

For once Kensi let Deeks to drive her home. He was kind of cute trying to keep the grenade ring on his finger while turning the wheel, but little by little his smile gave way to a tired expression and an unusual silence installed between them. The previous days have taken their toll on, and Kensi could tell that her now official fiancé was worn out. She knew she should be exhausted also, but her body was still keeping the inertia of the previous hours. She felt trapped. Unable to move inside the car all the energy seemed to be concentrating on a ball of rage in the shape of a lump on her throat. Suddenly she was sweating, but just when the air conditioning began to cool the car, Deeks parked in front of their house.

In a rush Kensi opened the front door and stepped inside. I felt weird, very weird, to be finally at home.

\- "Wow. Wait. You just proposed and now you're not going to carry me under the threshold of our humble dwelling? I'm disappointed, honey". – shouted Deeks from outside trying to cheer her up. –"Kensilina? Bunnyhoney-honeylovey?

The lump on Kensi's throat was growing. She needed to run. Even before Deeks was able to close the front door he had her shorts and tennis shoes on.

\- "C'mon Kens! Are you serious? Running, really?"

\- "Just ten minutes, promised!" – she managed to say before leaving.

Suddenly alone Deeks couldn't figure out what to do. TV was like a sacrilege, music didn't feel right either. He wasn't hungry but maybe Kensi would, he knew she was able to eat a cow after a run. But he wasn't in the mood for cooking either. He knew he should be happy, however he felt anything but happy at that moment. Sighing he went to the bedroom and saw Kensi's clothes scattered across the floor. Eew! Smelly clothes! Then he realized that his were even dirtier, and he felt an imperative need for taking a shower. With his head under the hot stream the walls he built around his heart started to collapse and he couldn't repress the tears anymore. He cried and cried the way he use to do when he was a child full of helplessness and his dad beat his mum, the way he thought he couldn't do anymore. He cried for the injustice more unjust in the world. He was still crying when Kensi arrived home.

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At first it seemed to be a great idea, but after the third block she started to have cramps.

-"What the hell? C'mon girl, you got this!" she told to herself.

The lump on her throat wasn't making the task easier and all of a sudden she wasn't feeling so hot anymore.

Deeks, poor guy. He was trying all his best to cheer her up and she just ran. She leaved the guy who was supposed to marry all by himself the worst and the best day of their lives. But she couldn't stay. And she knew he'd understand. As always.

Walking back to the house she decided to be strong for Deeks. She knew the special link he had with Michelle since the Sidorov case and that he blamed himself for not arriving in time to save her. She was sure she could handle a grieving Deeks, but in fact she felt relieved when she heard the shower running.

Good. Time to get rid of the lump. She opened the fridge to have some fresh water when she saw it: chocolate ice cream! Why she hadn't thought about it earlier? No matter what, the universal remedy for all the shit in the word was a liter of good chocolate ice cream.

Without bordering with a bowl she took the bucket, a big spoon and curled in the sofa decided to be superwoman for her man.

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Feeling somehow better Deeks got himself out of the shower. It was already dark outside. Silence. That's weird. Wait, would be Kensi still running? She said ten minutes. Oh God, no, no, no, not her… do not think like that, you idiot! In a hurry he put his jeans on and grabbing a clean T-shit he ran downstairs.

\- "Kens! Thank God, you scared me!" – he shouted relieved letting himself fall besides her on the sofa with the T-shirt still on his hand- "How long have you been here? Dessert before main dish? Why not?" If you're hungry we can phone for a pizza or something. Hey, Kens, are you listening to me?"

Kensi didn't move. She knew she should, but the ice cream wasn't working, the lump was still there, trapping her from inside preventing her for talking. She looked at Deeks' blue eyes and somehow he knew.

\- "Oh baby come here!" – he said hugging her, - "you're freezing!" - he kissed her dirty hair and rocked her like her mum did when she was little.

She started shivering in spite of Deeks body heat. She just wanted to disappear on his arms, to curl there under a cover with him and to sleep forever.

\- "Come here sweetie. You're going to be alright."

She barely registered when Deeks picked her up on his arms and carried her to the bathroom. The ball on her throat was bigger and bigger.

\- "We're going to warm you up. Shhhh baby, it's ok, you'll feel better soon."

She let Deeks to take off her clothes and lather her body up while the hot water was running free, steam invading the space.

\- "Don't fight it Kens. I know that is scaring, that you feel like it's going to eat you, but I promise, it will go. Don't fight it honey, for once in your life don't fight."

She could feel Deeks big hands, shampoo on her hair, the welcoming warmth and then a whimper.

\- "That's it, love. Let it go .Cry."

And she cried. She cried on Deeks arms under the hot water of the shower. She cried for Michelle and all the "ifs" and she felt the rage, the impotence, the pain. She felt so angry! She kissed Deeks with passion, she bit his lip and pound her nails on his back. She fought with the fly of his jeans - why he was wearing jeans on the shower, anyway? - but he stopped her. Not like that, not with rage and pain. He held her tight and whispered on her ear:

\- "Cry, baby, cry. It's all right."

And she cried. She cried until all her energy vanished and her legs couldn't support her anymore. And he took her on his arms to the bedroom. He dried her body and her eyes with kisses and they made love slowly and gently with all the delicacy and tenderness of the world, as if it were the first and the last time, as if there were no future.


	3. Chapter 3

A.N.: Thank you countrygirluk56 for letting me know the problem with the text. I hope this time you can read the chapter properly. Thanks!

Chapter 3

I was getting dark and Callen had still things to do before going home. Usually he liked to drive the Challenger, but today it felt wrong. Everything was feeling wrong, but he didn't have time to think about it. Not yet. Sam wanted to bury Michelle the next day and he'll need his brothers, his fellow SEALS, to be there, even if he wanted a private ceremony, Michelle was worthy of having a proper farewell, she had the right to rest in the military cemetery and to have a burial with all the honors. He knew Sam and the kids would appreciate it and he'll do all in his power to make it possible.

Stopping the car at the Chinese district he bought three burner phones and charging the battery of one of them on the car, he phoned Murphy and Rose to let them know his provisional new number. Then his first reflex was to phone Eric in order to get all the phone numbers he needed but just as he was dialing he stopped: "What I'm thinking?" he thought –"I'm just a bastard inconsiderate. Probably the poor guy is already sleeping after these two days working without resting."

He needed a computer, but he was far away from home or the mission and with the traffic he could spent two hours to cross the city. Definitely he wasn't on the mood for a cybercafé. Think!

Ok. Plan B. Driving again, he parked at the Beverly Hill Hotel. He hid his blue dirty plaid shirt under the jacket noticing that blisters were forming on his shoulder. He couldn't recall being burned, but now he couldn't ignore it anymore. His wrinkled jeans weren't in better shape than the shirt, but the old fashioned hotel had all he needed and he just had to be as quick as usual. Trying not to attire attention he entered the hall and went directly to the row of telephone booth cubicles where he found the best alternative to a computer: a California telephone book. Stealing it he came back to the car. "What the hell? The phone doesn't work"- he thought- but when he separates the phone of his left ear he saw on the screen that someone was on the other side of the line. It was his ear that didn't work. Great. Last time he suffered from a tympanum perforation he had balance problems for nearly a month. Certainly it wasn't the same thing to free diving in order to escape from a submarine thirty meters under the ocean, than an explosion from a suicide vest bomb. Maybe it wasn't a bad idea a career change after all.

He phoned again to the MCIWEST-MCB CAMPEN Adjutant office at Camp Pendleton to find out the procedures needed in order to bury Michelle. The officer in guard didn't know much about it, but when Callen detailed the sad events, he promised to locate the Command Duty Officer and phone him back. The mention of Sam Hanna's name was enough to facilitate everything.

Next call: Tom Olsen. The man was shocked by the bad news, but promised Callen to get in touch with the rest of Sam's ex-team mates.

Then he phoned Rod Washington, not because of his relationship with Sam, but as the father of Aiden's roommate at the academy. He didn't realize that it was so late, but even if the man was sleeping he promised to keep an eye on the boy at his return.

He knew Sam would call his family and Michelle's relatives so once the people were warned, what else is needed in a moment like this? Food. For a strange reason he never understood, people ate at the funerals, lots of food. He saw it in films. Neighbors and family always carried trays with all kind of things. Comfort food they called it, as if the food could bring the dear one back. Definitely he was unable to eat. Dialing again he phoned to Comfort L.A. a 24/7 restaurant in the Arts District of Downtown, at the 7th with Kolher St. if he recall correctly, that he knew the kids love, and ordered tons of chicken wings, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, beans, rice, meatloaf and Kamran's favorite banana pudding to be delivered in the morning to Sam's house.

What else? Flowers. Yes. With the aid of the telephone book he located a florist that for a strange reason opened also at night. At this moment he felt blessed to live in L.A. and not in the heartland America. Hetty taught him the meaning of flowers, so he commanded ten big floral arrangements and several bouquets of gladioli symbolizing strength, faith and honor. He assured that he will call later to give the cemetery address, but he made sure everything will be ready for the next day in the afternoon. At this point Callen was glad to have his credit card with him.

G was fidgeting in the car seat the whole time he spent to do the calls. A recently discovered sting on his inner ear and the permanent pain where the bullet hit his back were making hard for him to concentrate on the task. Starting the engine he decided to go to Sam's house, his Mercedes was parked there and he rather let the Challenger safe in the garage. He was exhausted.

After a short stop to fill the gas tank and to buy an energetic drink that he drank in two gulps, he finally arrived.

A yellow police tape crossed the main door and the alarms were deactivated. Angrily Callen strip it off and entered the house. Oh God! They were plastic numbers signaling the places where the evidences had been taken and black dust everywhere to reveal fingerprints. Following the traces he arrived to Sam and Michelle's bedroom. There was blood on the carpet and indications of fight. The police had searched all the drawers without any care and everything was in disorder. Callen went room by room cursing LAPD and its lack of respect; why on Earth they've registered Kamran's bedroom? He needed to clean all this mess before Sam and his family came back. For a moment he considered to hire the services of a professional team, but he would be wrong to let a stranger on the house. Resigned, he found all the products he needed on the kitchen and started to clean thoroughly the dust with a damp cloth advancing from the entrance to the rest of the house. At each wipe his rage augmented and it was precisely thanks to it that he was able to overcome the pain on his back and the tiredness of these two last days.

Several hours later the house was immaculate, all the extra beds with fresh sheets, Sam's uniform out of the closet and ready to wear and even the weapons Sam took from the garage were clean and secured again on the false wall, but Callen was completely worn out. He made another tour on the house to verify everything was in order when he saw at Sam and Michelle's bedroom the safe on the floor. Feeling stiffer each second he bended carefully and took it, pressing a button with his finger in the process. The safe opened with a click revealing a loaded gun, a burned phone, a passport, money and some papers. This was more than G could take. Michelle had time to tape nearly all the code. Just one more dammed button and Michelle could have had a chance against the men who took her. The button with the star, the lucky star, the luck she missed… sat on the floor next to the spot where he had cleaned before his friend's blood, G allowed himself to cry for the first time. The sobs were sending waves of pain from his back and he felt his body so tense that just breathing hurt. Incapable of stopping he cried himself to doze. The sun was rising on the horizon.


	4. Chapter 4

A.N.: Thank you for your support, your comments keep me writing! :)

Chapter 4

Sat on the green sofa at her library Hetty contemplated the sunrise on the other side of the window. All she could hear were the logs crackling in the fireplace and some early riser birds in the garden. The night had been tough. All the ghosts came to pay a visit and this time her barriers were so low that she couldn't prevent them for invading her soul. She wasn't afraid of dying, at least not anymore, but definitely she was getting old for loosing friends. She was still making peace with Owen's disappearance, his bag pack was getting heavier and he lived long enough the way he chose. Michelle on the other hand, so full or energy and life, with all the future in front of her… And her children. She had now another family to take care of. And Sam, his loyal team player, she had to make sure that he could find the balance in his life again.

Suddenly the phone rang, interrupting her thoughts, but it seemed that Hetty was waiting for the call.

\- "Lange"

\- "Are you drunk Henrietta?"

\- "Getting there, Leon, but unfortunately, no, I'm not drunk"- answered Hetty taking a sip of her whisky.

\- "I suppose coffee is not an option for you, eh? Henrietta, how the hell this could have happen?"

\- "Revenge is a powerful engine, Leon, and we all have our enemies in this profession."

\- "This time an international terrorism was involved and he was released by your team under your supervision. You know that everything is going to be investigated thoroughly, don't you?"

\- "Are you calling to threaten me or my team, Leon? Because in that case you better go to hell. I didn't hear your condolences yet and frankly at this moment we don't need more shit. Let us bury our dead in peace."

\- "Hetty I didn't mean…"

\- "Maybe not, but you just did."

After a big pause the director sighed and asked:

\- "How can I contact Sam?"

\- "He is unavailable for now, but I let you know the moment he'll be ready. I'm sure there will be a service soon."

\- "Please, keep me posted, and, Henrietta, whether you like it or not, the Department of Defense is going to get to the bottom of this."

\- "Have a good day Leon, if you can."

Hanging the phone Hetty gulped all her drink.

\- "Oh, bugger!"

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G had completely lost track of the time when a ring startled him. Disoriented for a moment he finally realized it was his new burner phone. His ear hurt.

\- "Callen"- he answered with a hoarse voice.

\- "Hey Callen. I'm sorry if I wake you up, I know is early…."- said Rose on the other side of the line.

\- "It's ok Rose, I wasn't sleeping. What's up?"

\- "I've just finished the autopsy, and the funerary home can take charge now. If you tell me which one is it I can arrange the paperwork with them to transfer the body."

\- "No, no, Rose, thank you, just keep Michelle there a little bit more, please. You go home; you've been up all night. A NCIS agent must be at the door just let him know that you're leaving."

\- "But Callen…"

\- "You've done enough Rose, and I really appreciate it, please go get some rest."

\- "All right then, but let me know if you need anything."

\- "Thank you, you're a good friend."

\- "Take care of the big guy"

\- "I'll do. Bye Rose."

Callen was still sat on the floor of Sam and Michelle's bedroom. He was exhausted and the awkward position he maintained in order to avoid the pain in his back didn't do any good to the rest of his already sore muscles. He had no time to think about resting, not until he got to arrange Michelle's burial and made sure that going out of the safe house will be ok for Sam and the kids.

Then he saw again the safe and all its contents on the floor. He decided to put everything away on its place and to lock it again without telling Sam how close Michelle had been of opening it that damned morning. Remembering the order of the items Callen was about to put the weapon and the passport down when he saw it. A paper folded in four. A receipt with something hide inside, a picture. What the hell?! Callen started to laugh. The picture was kind of blurry, but he clearly distinguished a very young Sam with bell bottom trousers and afro hair style shooting a gun on an arm gallery. In other circumstances he would have mocked Sam for decades. On the back of the picture Michelle's handwriting: "You were the same age :) He'll be fine. I love you."

The receipt was for an armory at West Hollywood, apparently for an already paid and repaired Glock 17 at Aiden's name. G decided to take it with the picture. Soon it will be Aiden's birthday and he was going to give the young man his mother present.

He put everything in place and still smiling he get up feeling dizzy in the process. A cold sweat ran down his back awaking his wounds with the sting, and his ear began to buzz. Definitely it wasn't a good idea to move quickly, he thought. His phone rang again. True to his word the officer in guard last night in Camp Pendleton passed the message to the MCIWEST-MCB CAMPEN Command Duty Officer who first thing in the morning contacted Callen. For half an hour they discussed all the details in order to make the burial possible. The time was tight, but the Officer engaged to provide Military Funeral Honors for Michelle that same afternoon if Callen could find a place in the Military Cemetery.

Overwhelmed with all the information and sored than before, G went to the kitchen. It was coffee in the pot, probably the last Michelle prepared, so he turned the coffee maker on to heat it and took again his phone. He needed help and he needed it now.

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Sipping her still very hot tea after she decided against opening another bottle of whisky, Hetty mulled over the last events. Her guts were telling her that something wasn't good, and even if she couldn't grab what exactly apart from the obvious, she was too old to dismiss the feeling.

The phone rang and she immediately felt relieved.

\- "Mr. Callen"- she saluted.

\- "How do you know…?"

\- "At this time in the morning, from an unknown number to my private line, it was more a deduction than a lucky guess. How are you?"- asked Hetty with concern.

Ignoring the question Callen went straight to the point:

\- "Hetty, Sam wants to bury Michelle today."

\- "I see. Are you two aware of the implications? There're so many things to prepare that it may be not possible."

\- "The autopsy is already finished and the arrangements with Camp Pendleton for the military honors are done too. Sam's brothers SEALS are just waiting to know the time and everything is ready at Sam's house to receive his family."

\- "Food?"

\- "In its way."

\- "Flowers?"

\- "Gladioli."

\- "Excellent choice. I hope you made sure Sam get some rest, you've been busy!"

\- "He is with the kids now, but I don't know if he had gotten much sleep."

\- "So what can I do for you, Mr. Callen?

\- "I'm sure you can menace someone at the military cemetery in order to assure the burial this afternoon."

\- "Well, no need for threatening this time. I know the right person and it happens he owns me a favor or two."

Callen sighed aloud, relieved, like taking a load off, fact that didn't get unnoticed by Hetty.

\- "Good. The later the best, we need to make sure everything is fine before the kids come to say goodbye to their mother."

\- "I let you know the exact time the moment I know it. Are you reachable at this number?"

\- "Yeah, I'll keep this one for now, but I'll be doing some phone calls. Please leave a message if I can't answer. The same for Sam, please; let him know that everything at home is ready, - even the garage, he knows what it means, - and that the plane will be at his disposal, he just needs to notify the pilot."

\- "Don't worry. I'll take care of it."

\- "Thank you Hetty."

Callen was about to hang up the phone when Hetty called him:

\- "Mr. Callen."

\- "Yeah?"

\- "Take care."

\- "Talk to you soon."

The conversation somehow reassured Hetty who was worried sick without news of her two senior agents. Just by the sound of his voice she could tell that Callen was exhausted, but also focused and all business; she was pleased that he was able to ask for help and that he trusted her with such an important task. A big step for him that showed how much he had progressed over the last years. Nevertheless her gut feeling was continuing to tell her that she was missing something.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The doorbell sounded loudly in the now awakening Hanna's neighborhood, startling Callen. He felt the noise reverberate on his ear and the headache came back with renovated energy. The food had arrived and for the next thirty minutes he stocked, froze and prepared everything with military precision, the way Sam used to do and the way he use to laugh every time he saw him doing it.

He drank the old coffee, rinsed the cup, pick up his stuff and went out the house. Too much to do and so little time!


	5. Chapter 5

A.N.: Thank you for your nice comments. It means a lot to know that you're there making the journey with me ;) I hope you enjoy this one!

Chapter 5

Sam woke up at the sunrise. Even if he hadn't slept for nearly two days old habits die hard. Trying not to make any noise he went out, acknowledged with a head sign the bodyguard at the door and sat on the wooden steps of the back porch that gave access to the beach. The view was spectacular. The chill air of the early morning made him shiver and suddenly he felt small, small and alone.

Last night was without any doubt the harder time of his not so easy life. Over the years he had been wounded, he had lost many friends and family, he was used to confront terrorists and criminals, but the two set of eyes full of sadness, fear and questions that were awaiting him at his arrival were the worst ordeal he ever had to pass, and he knew that it was only the beginning. Michelle was his balance, his refuge, his counselor, his friend, his lover. Always a hand, a prank, a laugh. The interminable conversations and the companion silence. The word sorrow wasn't enough to describe the immense emptiness he was feeling.

Sam heard some timid steps behind him and he turned quick, startled.

\- "Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you."- said Aiden who still sleepy and wrapped in a blanket entered the porch.

\- "You don't. You never." – answered Sam extending his hand to him –"Come here, son."

Aiden sat at Sam's side and shared the blanket with him. At this point he was bigger than his father, but he managed to nestle against him the same way he did when he was little. Sam put his arm around him and caressed his short hair with the other hand. Together they saw the sun conquer the remaining of the darkness and become shiny and powerful as a phoenix reviving from his ashes.

\- "Daddyyyyyyyyyy!" – called Kamran.

\- "In here sweetie!"

\- "Why she has to be always sooo noisy?"- asked Aiden sitting up suddenly self-conscious of his own child-like posture.

\- "You have to be patient with your sister"- said Sam kissing his son on the head.

\- "Why you didn't wake me up?"- protested the girl from the screen door rubbing her eyes.

\- "What for, sleepy head? You needed to rest and it's still early."

\- "But I wanted to be with you."

\- "And you are now, ranter!" – called his brother who went to her side carried her by the waist and in spite of her kicking and giggles threw her towards Sam who gently stopped the fall and holding her like a baby kissed her repeatedly.

\- "Dadyyyy! Stop, stop you're tickling me!"- she protested feebly. – "Wow it's beautiful here! Do you think mum could see it also?"

An awkward and thick silence installed between the three of them in the way only happens with teenagers. Aiden looked at his father arms crossed on his chest defensively and ready to jump if some religious meaning were invoked. Kamran's big eyes were fixed on Sam, and he understood that his answers from now on could draw him apart from his two children. Taking his time and looking both of them in the eyes he answered with all the sincerity he was able of:

\- "I want to believe she does, Kamran. That also she can see us and that, somehow, she can take care of us in another way she always did."

The little one hugged her father and Aiden unfold his arms, involuntarily showing his approval.

\- "Can we go for a swing, dad?"

\- "Sure thing, but let me fix breakfast first."

\- "I'm hungry!"- exclaimed Aiden.

\- "And when not?"- said Kamran mocking him.

\- "I'm gonna eat you, sillyyyyy!" and brother and sister ran inside the house teasing each other.

Sam sighed, looked once more the beautiful sun against the blue sky and followed the not so children inside. He didn't realize how hungry he was until he started to eat. Last days he kept his body going forcing himself to gulp protein bars and water, but now he was feeling stronger after a copious breakfast of yoghurt, muesli, toast, bacon, eggs and fruit. While cleaning the table he mentally started a list of things needed to be done back at home. The cemetery, the coroner office, the burial… Michelle's sister and mum as well as his father and even his aunt Tricia were on their way to L.A. and he needed to prepare the house to accommodate everyone. The house! The weapons! Overwhelmed for the enormity of the tasks to do and the realization of the impossibility of bury Michelle he panicked and immediately thought on his best friend. At least he could hide the weapons before his kids could see his secret wall. He picked the phone and called G. No answer. He waited a minute and phoned again with the same results. Why the hell he didn't answer?! Trying not to worry, he decided that maybe he was in the shower. He'd call back. Then he saw it, a little green blinking in the answering machine. He pressed the play button and listened to Hetty's message:

"Good morning Sam. I hope you and your family had been able to rest and the accommodation suits your needs. I took the liberty of speaking in your behalf in order to bury Michelle this afternoon in the military cemetery as you wished. A private ceremony will take place at seven. Everything is ready for you at home and you just need to notify the pilot the time of your trip in advance. Please, extend my condolences to your kids and don't worry about the garage if you know what I mean. See you later."

An immense relief and a wave of gratitude inundated Sam's heart. He blessed Hetty and phoned his relatives to communicate the details for the burial. Then he dialed G's number again. Nothing. Maybe his battery was out. He'll try again later. He put the swimming trunks he found on the closet, brushed his teeth and follow his kids to the beach.

\- "Daddy! We're ready! Are you coming?"- asked his daughter from the porch.

\- "Right behind you honey"

Sam took Aiden and Kamran for a short walk on the beach under the attentive look of the agent in charge of the security of the family. He explained the details of the burial that afternoon and asked them to be ready to fly home in two hours.

\- "Ok, we have time for a bath, then."- said Kamran running into the ocean water.

Sam took the T-shirt off to follow her, but Aiden took his arm stopping him:

\- "Dad… your back"- he said at the sight of the scabs on his father back. Both father and son looked each other in the eye and Aiden knew for sure that his mother was already avenged. Until now he never saw that side of his dad, and even if he hadn't decided yet whether he liked it or not he grow a new respect for his old man.

\- "Don't worry, just some scratches"- Sam answered getting on the water. The salt stung like hell and he had to make an effort to hide his discomfort from his daughter.

After a short swim that loosened up his sore muscles Sam went to the house and tried to phone G again. Once more time he wasn't answering. Then he dialed Hetty's number with identic result. Deducing that they were together he hung up and went to the bathroom to have a shower and get ready to come back home.


	6. Chapter 6

A.N.: Thank you for reading and for your feedback. I'm not able to answer the comments done by people who read as a guest, just to say that they are very much appreciated. I hope you'll enjoy this one.

Chapter 6

Eric opened his eyes just to find Nell on his too-big-for-her- Spiderman pajamas sleeping at his side. He closed his eyes to continuing dreaming and then he opened them again.

\- "Ouch!" – cried Nell when she felt Eric's pinch – "What the hell are you doing, silly?"

\- "Are you real? Or this is not really, really happening? I mean you're talking, so you must be real, but what are you doing in my bed? Oh! You look so cute with my pajamas… but how do you have my pajamas on? It must be a dream. But a very good one. Oh my head…"

\- "Eric, please! Shut up!"

\- "So you're real. The real Nell Jones. In my bed. With me. With my super favorite Spiderman pajamas."

Nell put a hand on Eric's mouth to prevent him from starting again his nonsense.

\- "Yes, I'm real and already regretting being here. Sorry."- she said getting up from the bed.

\- "No! wait!"- cried Eric holding her arm back –"Please, Nell!"

Seeing him so lost and cute, with his spiky blonde hair and all the confusion of the world in his sleepy eyes, made Nell to sit again on the bed.

\- "What do you think it happen, Beale?"

\- "I don't know, I really don't! But I can tell you what didn't happen."

\- "And what's that?"

\- "You and I … I mean, we didn't… you know…"

\- "How can you be so sure?" – asked Nell somewhat offended without any particular reason.

\- "Because I'm sure that make love with you would be unforgettable."

\- "You just won the special Jones' breakfast!" – she said kissing him lightly on the lips for Eric's delight. The poor guy was even more confused.

\- "But Nell, what happen?"

\- "What's the last thing you remember?"

\- "I remember… being in Ops… Michelle…"- he said suddenly sad.

\- "Yeah…"

\- "I know! I know! Last thing I remember is Hetty's whisky. But that doesn't explain the Spiderman pajamas."

\- "I found you sleeping on the couch and I managed to bring you home."

\- "Still. The pajamas…"

\- "You vomited on me, Beale."

\- "Oups. Sorry. That explains my terrible headache."

\- "Ready for breakfast?" - asked Nell getting this time up from the bed.

\- "And for an aspirin. But let me check on Sam first."- said Eric taking his phone from the nightstand.

Nell started to cut some fruit when Eric announced:

\- "Neither Sam nor Callen are answering their phones."

\- "Let them rest, I can't even imagine how Sam has passed the night, they will probably be sleeping."

\- "It would be a first for G, but I really hope so"- said Eric.

The sound of Nell's phone made the couple jump.

\- "Oh, oh, it's Hetty"- complained Nell.

\- "Don't, don't answer!"- exclaimed Eric who saw his dreams of a quiet breakfast with the girl he wanted vanish in the air.

\- "Good morning Hetty"- saluted Nell answering the phone. –"No, you're not interrupting anything. Hangover, a big one, I'm afraid… of course. Do you need ...? Ok… we'll be there… I'll try my best. Thank you Hetty. You too."

Eric's puppy face made Nell laugh.

\- "So?"

\- "So you are getting your special Jone's breakfast. Hetty gave us two free days. Michelle's burial is this afternoon at seven at the military cemetery."

\- "That's quick"- he commented sad. Suddenly the perspective of the two days off wasn't so appealing – "wait, what you need to try your best for?"

Nell chuckled:

\- "To make you wear pants."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

When G looked at his phone he saw a missed call. Ignoring the fact that he was driving, he listened to the message on the answering machine. It was Hetty. She managed to take care of the burial at the military cemetery and she even talked to the morgue and the NCIS agent there to ask them to move Michelle's body that afternoon. The event will begin at seven. Sam and the team were already up to date and he could use the black suit of her undercover wardrobe.

Callen was so relieved that he failed to close his eyes in the middle of the highway. His admiration for Hetty grew along with his fondness for her. Just when it started to rain he got off of the 10th at La Cienaga Boulevard, turned right at West Pico and hid his Mercedes behind a truck on the back parking of the Walgreens at the corner with Fairfax Avenue, some blocks away from Little Ethiopia. He picked again the phone and contacted Camp Pendleton to confirm place and hour for the burial, same with the flower shop, and last but not least, he gave the information to Tom Olsen who promised to spread the word to his fellow SEALS.

Now that everything related to the burial was settle Callen could finally get focus on his main worry, the security of Sam and his kids. He went out the car and he picked a loaded gun, handcuffs and a hood sweat from his sport bag on the trunk.

Callen felt so sored that just the fact of putting the sweat on and hid the gun on the small of his back made him whimper. The blisters on his shoulder had grown to form big ones and he knew he couldn't continue to ignore his wounds much more time. He looked himself in the rear mirror and was surprised to see how much he had deteriorated since last day. Four days stubble, red eyes with bags under them, dirty hair. He looked like a man on the edge and that suited perfectly his intentions.

The neighborhood was unusually quiet as always did the days after the police made an appearance and that only meant one thing: the big mafias operating the area throw their little new recruited to the streets in order to gather information about what had happened and to control the police movements. Usually the big drugs exchanges were done right under the noses of the police busy with another affair. That was precisely what Callen needed. He walked towards Olympic Boulevard with the hood on, the street looked nearly deserted, but he knew better. On the next corner hidden behind the awning of an Ethiopian restaurant, two black boys in his late teens one of them dressed with a jubbah were arguing in low voice. As Callen passed by, both of them stopped talking but not before G could hear the Arabic word "بندقية"("gun"). "I got you" – he thought, and accelerating his pace he arrived at the 7 –Eleven on the corner. It was the perfect place to close deals, open 24/7, low profile people, not very well assorted convenience store, but with enough movement of clients to assure a certain sense of impunity. He was pretty sure the boys would show up there sooner or later and that he would need help to carry out his plan. Reluctantly, before entering the store he sent a quick text.

For the next hour Callen sat on a bar stool next to the shop window where he could control people going in and out. At the drinks machine he picked a big Coke that tasted disgusting and he faked to read the news from a free local newspaper. The bored clerk seemed to be more interested in doing her nails that on what was going on around the shop. The rain outside was heavy now and G's gut tell him that action was about to start. He hated to be right.


	7. Chapter 7

A.N.: as always thank you for reading!

Chapter 7

Sam's spirits were in a roller-coaster. The happiness of being with Aiden and Kamran, the first time in such a long time, gave way to a sudden guilt and sadness. He felt so bad for the kids that he didn't know how to cope with their solicitude towards him.

Kamran seemed to be surprisingly fine, somewhat delighted by the fact of being the center of attention of her brother, and Aiden was enduring the situation with a maturity and serenity strange for his age. Sam felt so proud of them! Michelle had always been the heart and soul of the family and he feared that the big hole of her absence could engulf everything. He needed to be the anchor for their kids now and he was clueless about how to do it.

The flight had been ready at his request and even the doctor insisted in doing a quick check up before arriving to L.A. Some days of rest and antibiotic pills for a week were his recommendations and all things considered he was pretty lucky of being alive. He froze now at the thought of the possibility of letting his children orphans just to finish Khaled. G was right, he knew first-hand how hard life could be without parents; his kids needed him, but he needed to do what he did. G… where the hell was he? For a moment he considered he might be hurt, but discharged the idea. He was the first one in getting up after the explosion and he was just fine at the coroner office. Probably he was just resting. They both were lucky to be alive.

Seconds before arriving home Sam surprised himself at thinking about what he was going to tell Michelle, the house on the beach and the private jet. Denial. The realization of her death was appalling, but the furtive tear that escaped from the corner of his eye was wiped out without any pity. He needed all his strength. With a sight he opened the front door of his house. He was afraid of finding traces of the police's stuff, but everything was impeccable, even the things that should be displaced were on the proper places as nothing had happened. With the excuse of turning the boiler on, Sam went to the garage to check on the weapons. Everything was in place and clean. He recognized Hetty's meticulousness, every weapon were perfectly oiled in the way she taught the team to do it. Relieved he went upstairs, Kamran was helping herself banana pudding in a bowl.

\- "Thank you daddy, you remembered this time which one is my favorite."- she said, going out from the kitchen.

Sam was about to answer when Aiden interrupted him even before he started:

\- "Dad, can I go to my room?"- he asked hopping to have a moment for himself without his sister. The burden of being the big brother was starting to feel heavy on his shoulders.

\- "Yes, of course you can, champ. Do you want a sandwich or something to eat?" – Sam asked to his already running son who didn't bother to answer.

\- "Aideeeen!" – called Kamran from the living room.

\- "Sweetie, let your brother for a while, please. He needs to be left alone."

\- "Why dad?"

\- "Because he is sad."

\- "I'm also sad, but I'd be sadder alone."

\- "You're a big girl now and you must understand that each person have a different way of dealing with their emotions. Your brother needs just a little privacy right now."

\- "And you, daddy? Do you want me to leave you alone?"- she asked with tears in her eyes.

\- "Come here, baby." – he said sitting at her side and hugging her tight – "I'll never, never ask you to leave me alone."

Both father and daughter dozed embraced on the sofa when the doorbell rang. Sam first thought was that it was G at the door, but the spyhole revealed Michelle's mum and sister.

Sam never considered himself a coward, but to face the two pair of eyes of Michelle's family was far worse than being shot. Unable to speak, he offered his arms as a poor consolation but he only found love and sadness instead of hate and reproach, and the wave of gratitude he felt made him cry.

\- "Grandma, Auntie!"- exclaimed Kam running to embrace the newcomers.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A short, fat but muscled Hispanic man, in his late forties entered the store. "Surprise, surprise"- thought Callen. The man was Ramón Hernández, an old acquaintance from his days with the D.E.A., and of the intermediary of the Molina cartel who just finished his time in prison and was willing to prove his value to his boss. Callen hide behind the newspaper when Hernández looked around checking the emergency exits and picked randomly some stuff from the selves. One of the boys that Callen saw before on the street made his appearance at this moment, looked nervous around and went to the coffee machine. Hernández approached the machine for the other side and he didn't look happy at the sight of the boy. He made a signal with his head, went to the cashier and paid for the few items before going to the parking. Not waiting to see the boy to follow the man, G headed towards the toilet and went out the store using the back door. From there he located the other boy, the one dressed with the jubbah, who clumsily was trying to hide behind some bushes at the other side of the parking. He had a knife in his hand, and no clue of how to use it. A row of big dumpsters were protecting Callen from being seen. He considered taking the gun out, but the noise of a shot would attire undesirable attention. Adrenaline was high and in spite of his bad shape he felt ready to act if necessary. Seconds later Hernández showed up with the teenager at his heels. The kid talking infuriated the man who, before Callen could react produced a knife and stabbed the boy.

-" Yamal!"- Cried his friend who went out the bushes to help him.

Nearly at the same time, without hesitation Callen went out from his hiding place. He had no angle to shot Hernández so he ran and jumped over him. The surprise factor made him to take advantage; he landed on Ramon's back who resisted falling, then grabbed him by the neck with his arm and pressed his carotid.

\- "Señor Hernández ¿drogas o armas esta vez? (drugs or weapons this time?)- asked Callen in Spanish, trying to increase the pressure in spite of his awkward position.

\- "Nada con este niñato." (nothing with this snot)- he answered chocking, and going backwards he thrown himself with Callen still on his back to a parked van.

Callen's back hit the van in the first place. The impact wasn't as violent as Hernández hoped, but was strong enough to make Callen cry in pain and to let loose from the man's back falling hard with his knees to the grave. For a moment G struggled to remain conscious, all the air was out of his lungs and the pain prevented him to breath.

Free from Callen's embrace and seeing him motionless on the floor, the dealer coughed, spited a few times and grabbing his knife he hesitated for a second whether finishing the kid off or sending Callen to hell. That second was enough for Callen to finally take a deep breath and to run against him again. Hernández turned around to fight Callen, giving his back to the boys; the uninjured teen benefited of Callen's move and looking at his knife as it was the first time he saw it, stabbed the dealer fatally on the kidney. Callen held Hernández with his arm; trying to ignore the pain that blurred his vision and the world spinning around him, asked him in Spanish:

\- "¿Quién es el comprador, Ramón? ¿de cuánto estamos hablando?" ("who is the byer, Ramón? how much are we talking about?" )

\- "El tipo sudanés… al por mayor… parecía serio… jodidos muchachos…" ("The Sudanese guy…wholesale… it seemed a serious deal… fucking kids…")- he said just before he exhaled his last breath.


	8. Chapter 8

A.N.: I know, I know, you're wondering what Callen is doing. Well you're about to figure it out, but please, bear with Callen (and with me!) this story has its own pace. Thank you for being there :)

Chapter 8

The unexpected appearance of a car on the parking astonished the two boys. The wounded one pressed his hand against his side. He was bleeding, but not too bad, and even if he staggered when standing up, he seemed more in control than his friend.

\- "Kill him"- he ordered signaling Callen who still in his knees besides Hernández's body was fighting against the vertigo and the pain.

\- "ожидание!" ("wait!")- he cried in Russian –" Я получил то, что вам нужно" and repeated in English marking his accent: "I have what you need".

But the kid, afraid, attacked with the knife. Callen was so out that the only thing he could do was to raise his arm trying to protect himself from a blade that never arrived to its objective. A boot coming from nowhere hit the boy in the arm and the knife flew away. The two teenagers seemed paralyzed at the sight of Callen's reinforcement.

\- "Наручники" (handcuffs)- offered Callen to the newcomer. He was still trying to control the vertigo completely dizzy.

\- "Спасибо" (Thank you) – answered Anna who expertly cuffed the two guys to the van's bumper and positioned her car blocking the sight of the corpse and the boys from the shop and the street.

The rain had stopped and a beautiful sun was making its appearance between the clouds at the now blue sky. People could arrive anytime.

Anna opened the trunk took a big plastic sheet, covered Hernández with it and rolled the body over it making a big package. The teenagers looked terrified.

After what it seemed one eternity Callen finally got up, he took his gun out and went to the boys.

\- "You have two choices: we can leave you here with the body and the knife with your fingerprints, until the police find you, or you can tell me the name of your boss and pass the message that I have what he wants. Weapons. Lots of them."- he said faking the Russian accent. Then added addressing Anna:

\- "фото"- and she stepped over the body and took a picture of each boy with his phone.

\- "Ok, please, let us go! We'll pass the message!"

\- "Give me a name."

\- "C'mon man, he will kill us."

Callen unlocked the safe of the gun and aimed the cannon to the blessed kid.

\- "So I do. A name. Now."- he said slowly, rolling the words.

\- "Aran Mafur."

\- "Good. Now you tell Aran Mafur to call this number." – he said reciting them by heart the number of the third burn phone that Anna noted also in a piece of paper and gave to him. With a skilled move G put it on the pocket of the wounded guy stealing his cellphone in the process. -"Oсвободить их" (free them)- he added addressing to Anna who, somewhat amused, started to take off the cuffs of the van. Just when she was about to finish Callen stopped her.

\- "Before you go, you put the body and the knife on the trunk. And remember, if I don't have any news from Aran Mafur in five days, I know where to find you, and you'll make some company to your friend here."

The boys were completely terrified and when Anna took the handcuffs off obediently they lifted with effort the body to Anna's car, threw the weapon on top, closed the trunk and ran away as quick as the wounded kid could.

Anna turned to Callen who was sat on the hood with an arm supporting his ribs.

\- "So…?"- she asked smiling.

\- "So what?"

\- "So are you going to tell me why two boys were about to kill you and why I have a body on my car?"- she asked again more seriously.

\- "Let's get out of here."- the moment he stood up a wave of dizziness made Callen stumble. He was pale and sweating.

\- "Oh gosh!" You're hurt!" – exclaimed Anna running to his side.

\- "It's nothing! Let's go, please! We need to go now!"

The urgency in his voice made Anna to turn to the driver's door and start the engine. Callen dropped himself at the passenger seat and closed his eyes. His back was killing him and he wish he could stop the carousel on his head.

\- "Ok, where's the nearest hospital?"

\- "What? No! just let me at the corner with Pico."

\- "You're kidding, right?

\- "Please, Anna? I've my car at Walgreens."

\- "Callen…"

\- "Just go there, please"- he begged with his eyes closed and the head against the window.

Less than ten minutes later Anna parked next to Callen's car. Tentatively she touched G's forehead. He opened his eyes, more focused than before.

\- "You're running a fever. Callen…" –Started Anna caressing worried Callen's wet hair. He sighted defensively not in the mood for a reprimand.

\- "I'm so sorry about Michelle"- she continued softer this time.

\- "How do you know?"

\- "Kensi told me."

\- "Kens?"

\- "Yeah. I've been trying to phone you for two days now and neither you, nor Hetty nor Sam answered. I thought that maybe you were undercover or something, and I didn't want to intrude, but I was worried, so I phoned Kensi. I'm sorry. How's Sam? Sorry again. Stupid question."

\- "It was so cruel… I don't know how Sam is gonna deal with it. And the kids…. The only thing I know is that I need to keep them safe."

\- "So, was your friend on the trunk a menace?"

\- "Ramón Hernández. He was just a B-list drug dealer with high aspirations, the Molina cartel's first link. The boys wanted him to provide some Sudanese terrorist with weapons and we just interrupted the contact. If the Sudanese cellule is operative here, Sam and his family could be still in danger."

\- "That's a long shot and you're not well; you can't go alone out there searching for terrorists!"

\- "And that's exactly why I need you. Please, Anna, will you work for me?"

\- "Callen…"

\- "I can't ask Hetty to put some people in a track so weak, but I'm sure that it's something big behind this. I'll pay you, of course, double tariff. I just can't afford to lose this hint, and I won't be able to do this alone."

He looked so sincere and vulnerable that Anna kissed him gently on the lips.

\- "I guess my first task will be taking care of "tu amigo". This is going to make Arkady's day."

\- "Here. Yamal's phone. Ramón must have his also. I'm sure we can extract some information. And this is the one where Aran Mafur is supposed to call."- he said giving her the cellphones.

\- "Ok, but let me drop you at home first. I'll phone Arkady and I'll take a look at you."

\- "I can't, this afternoon is Michelle's burial."

\- "At what time?"

\- "At seven at the military cemetery."

\- "Callen… its five o clock…"

\- "I've to go. I'll phone you. Thanks. For everything!"- he said and after a quick kiss on the cheek he went out the car.

\- "Take care, please, I love you!"

Callen entered his car in a hurry cursing and hoping for a miracle to arrive in time. He didn't hear Anna's last phrase.


	9. Chapter 9

A.N.: Thank you for your comments and your support. It means a lot to me to feel reassured. I know you're impatient. Getting there!

Chapter 9

She was dressed in black just with the little black dress that all women in the occidental world kept on their "must have" wardrobe. In other ones usually it looked dull, but in Kensi it was simply awesome. She was combing her hair without taking her eyes out of Deeks thinking about how lucky she was to have him in her life.

\- "You look gorgeous" – said Kensi.

\- "You and your thing with uniforms… I look ridiculous"- answered Deeks who was in front of the bedroom mirror still struggling with the tie of his L.A.P.D. blue uniform.

\- "No, you don't. Think about what represents this uniform "To protect and serve", and that's what you do, you must be proud of wearing it."- She affirmed while expertly tied his tie from behind his shoulders; then pinching him in the butt she added – "and yes, I have a thing with uniforms."

They were at home getting ready for Michelle's burial after a very and unusually calm day. They both overslept in the morning even if neither of them had much faith in getting a night free of nightmares after the terrible past days. In fact it was Hetty's call what woke them up with the announcement of the service that same afternoon:

\- "Huuuumm…who was it?" – asked Kensi still asleepy.

\- "Hetty…"- said Deeks once he let his phone at the nightstand.

Kensi jumped out of the bed ready to get dress in seconds.

\- "What's wrong? Sam? the kids?"- she asked again fearing the worst.

\- "Wow! No, nothing is wrong, well not worse that yesterday, anyway! Come here!"- called Deeks – "she just wanted us to know that they are burying Michelle today."

\- "That was quick."- Kensi came back to the bed and looked Deeks in the eyes.

\- "I guess Sam needs closure as soon as possible, but yes, giving the circumstances that was quick." –he said pensive.

\- "And…"

\- "And what?"

\- "I don't know, Deeks, but every time you make that face it means that is something else."- she laid on Deeks' chest. He welcomed her and started to play with her hair.

\- "What face? Are you "physioanalyzing" me?"

\- "Deeks!"

\- "It's nothing, really, just an impression. Hetty, she sounded… I don't know…kinda old?"

\- "She must be exhausted if she had managed everything. I don't know how she can do that." – she paused and added in a soft voice –"By the way, I want to thank you for last night. I…I…"

\- "You have nothing to thank me, Kensilina, it's me who want to thank you for that beautiful ring….argggg, ha, ha, ha, don't, no tickles, no tickles! Keeeeens!"

That had been the beginning of an incredible day together just enjoying their mutual company and letting all the problems out of their pink cloud, their bubble of love. They were so happy that they felt guilty.

Now, still in front of the mirror with the tie impeccably tied, Deeks put the grenade ring in the front pocket of his uniform, just at the height of his heart.

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Hetty adjusted the silk scarf on the neck of her blouse and put some perfume on. Life seemed always better with a French perfume. She was tired, it was true that she didn't got too much sleep lately, but she was tired of losing the loved ones, she was tired of feeling responsible, she was tired of her gut telling her that problems weren't over, she was tired of the evil wining another set at nearly the end of her match. She knew that probably she would pass the next weeks in Washington discussing nonsense as her team, her family, needed her. The issue was that they needed her strong and she wasn't feeling that way.

She asked Alfred to prepare the car. Today she was too tired to drive.

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Eric's phone rang. Again. And he answered the same thing. Again.

\- "Why you don't just turn it off Eric?"- asked Nell losing her patience.

\- "I can't do that. And even if I do they will be calling you, so …"

\- "At this rate you're not going to get out of the fitting room in a week! I really need to go home before the service."

\- "I know, I know. It was Sam asking for Callen. Again."

He moved aside the curtain and stepped outside.

\- "What do you think?"- asked Eric feeling uncomfortable with the navy blue suit and the serious shirt.

Nell thought that he was the more handsome, intelligent and best man she could ever dream for, and that he was looking great in a suit even wearing flip flops.

\- "This one would do it. Let's go!"

The phone rang. Again.

\- "Hello Kens."

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Sam was alone in the room he shared all these years with Michelle, getting ready for the moment he never thought he would need to be ready ever. The room seemed huge and even if everything was clean and in perfect order he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep there again. Not without her.

He dressed slowly taking his time as he like to do each time he put his livery on. Each one of the stripes and decorations were supported by years of hard work and service. Now he knew that all his training and expertise meant nothing and that feeling scared him more than he would recognize.

He was proud of their son and daughter they were the bravest and more supportive kids in the world and they are proving to be ready to fly out of the nest. Aiden was a nearly a man, strong, bold, responsible and caring, in one month he will be eighteen and next year he'll be probably deciding between West Point and Yale. And Kamran, his little princess wasn't a princess anymore. She was like her mother, independent, tenacious, intelligent and sweet. He conditioned his life to them, to his family; he renounced to be an active SEAL in order to spend more time with them. He didn't regret that decision, but now that his family was about to vanish he didn't know how to be alone because he had never been.

\- "Dadyyyyy!" – called Kamran from the living room – "We are readyyyyy!"

Sam wasn't.


	10. Chapter 10

A.N.: I was able to finish this one also, so here it goes! please let me know what do you think. Thank you for reading :)

Chapter 10

The previous rain gave way to a blue, orange and pink sky, a bright spectacle that contrasted the sad spirits of the people. At the military cemetery the ceremony was about to start, some of Sam's fellow SEALS were already going to the chapel in order to take Michelle's coffin to the recently open grave in the cemetery yard. At the outside Kensi, Nell, Deeks and Eric, who was wearing not only pants but even a dark tie, were wondering about their team leader:

\- "It's already seven, Kens; where the hell is Callen?"- asked Deeks checking again his watch worried.

\- "I have not idea! he's not answering his phone, I'd just tried again. Nada."- she answered looking around and feeling nervous.

\- "Beale! Can you locate Callen with that tablet of yours?"- murmured Deeks as he rub his neck in an attempt to lessen the stiffness of his LAPD uniform.

\- "His GPS is disconnected since yesterday, and he's not at home, I've checked the footage on the security cameras on his neighborhood and he hadn't being there in days. No phone, no GPS. You know, if the man doesn't want to be located he can became a ghost. Perhaps he has become one!"- added Eric earning a nudge from Nell. Deeks insisted:

\- "Should we go to look for him? Maybe something is wrong, maybe he's wounded, maybe the shot caused…

\- "Deeks! Stop the maybes! Yes, he took a bullet on the vest; nevertheless in the ambulance he was fine, just sored and joking about it."- said Nell.

\- "And even if we go to look for him, where do you want to start for? I mean, he can be anywhere, and Sam needs us here."- added Kensi.

\- "Yes, but he needs Callen more than us."

\- "Hey, guys! Probably he's with Hetty"- guessed Eric.

\- "Someone called me? Ladys, gentlemen"- saluted Hetty coming from nowhere and startling everyone as usual.

\- "Hetty has Callen come with you?"- asked Kensi unable to hide her anxiety.

Before Hetty could answer Kamran approached the group. The little girl, dressed all in black, looked tired and sad, but composed given the circumstances.

\- "Hi guys. My dad is looking for Uncle Callen, he wants him to help to carry… mum… have you seen him?"

\- "No my dear, but don't worry he'll be here anytime."

\- "Ok, thank you Hetty"- she said returning to her father's side at the interior of the chapel.

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When Callen arrived to the mission still cursing L.A. traffic, agents Jobs, Murphy and Reynolds surrounded him hounded with hundreds of messages, but the only one he could retain was that his team was desperate to locate him. With no time to lose he managed to dismiss everyone and locked himself up in the locker room. Once alone, G gritted his teeth and removed his clothes carefully. Taking a deep breath assessed his injuries in the mirror. The cut on his wrist was open again, it hurt, but the bleeding has stopped, a pressure bandage will do it for now. The two blisters on the burn of his shoulder were now a bigger one. He decided not to touch it, neither time nor way to treat it correctly one handed and it would be all right if the skin held up. A big black bruise was marking the spot where the bullet hit him, but there was nothing he could do about it. Scrapes to his back, arms, and now knees were superficial but, nonetheless, they stung as he wiped a warm cloth over them. He wasn't sure how effective he'd been at getting out the grit and loose skin, but if stinging pain was any indicator, then he'd been very successful. Some tears of pain ran down his cheeks. He looked like crap and felt like it, even after a shave and a shower. When he finished tidying up and dressing with Hetty's fancy suit he was hurting all over, his head was killing him and he felt feverish. He was glad nobody saw him get out the building.

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Some minutes later people started to go to the burial place that was decorated with more flower arrangements than a wedding. They were two groups of sit rows, one in front of the grave reserved for the family running perpendicular to the other one forming an L. Both of them were soon occupied by the family and close friends leaving the first row of each side free for the closest. Aiden put his head out the door of the chapel and had a look around presumably trying to locate Callen.

\- "Mr. Deeks, go inside."- ordered Hetty taking charge of the situation.

\- "But Hetty I…"

\- "Go, don't worry, Sam will be grateful, believe me. And the rest of you- she added- let's go to have a sit."

As everyone else Hetty was now seriously worried about Callen. "I hope you had a good reason for not being here, Mr. Callen" she thought. His absence could only mean trouble, and they all had had enough. Forcing herself not to overthink, she followed the team to the row reserved for them.

\- "Marty, where's Callen?" asked Aiden in low voice the moment Deeks entered the chapel- "My dad is asking for him in order to start, but we can't wait anymore!"

\- "If you and your dad allow me I would be honored to help you, Aiden."- said Deeks moved.

\- "The honor would be ours, you save my mum once."

\- "And I'll regret all my life not being able to do it again, Aiden. I'm so sorry."

The young man hugged Deeks and wiping the tears from his eyes accompanied him to the side of the coffin that, covered with the American flag, was already surrounded by some of Sam's closest marine friends in their full dress uniforms. For once in his life Deeks felt proud of wearing his itchy L.A.P.D. uniform.

The ceremony started with a melancholic music and Kamran with a beautiful bouquet of white gladioli walking in front of her mother's coffin carried by Sam, Aiden, Deeks and three navy S.E.A.L.S., who gently put Michelle on the platform over the grave and reached their seats. The sun, still bright orange, was setting in the pink and blue horizon and a light breeze caressed the flags making them flap like accompanying the sad notes. The music stopped leaving everyone deeply moved. Tom Olsen limped along to the stand, he looked around to the small crowd and, just when he was about to start his speech, Kamran ran out.


	11. Chapter 11

A.N.: Thanks for your nice comments, you make me happy with your reviews. Little warning: this is a sad chapter, if you feel down don't read it now!

Chapter 11

Everyone was startled at the kid's reaction, but when Aiden was about to run after her Sam stopped him. He had seen where his daughter was going. Everybody followed the girl with their eyes as she ran across the yard and stopped besides a man dressed in a stylish dark suit, white shirt, silk black tie and pilot sunglasses, that was standing near a cypress.

\- "Uncle Callen!"- she welcomed crying and throwing herself into Callen's arms.

\- "Hi sweetie"- Callen returned the hug, holding the girl very tight and kissing her on the head- "I'm sorry, honey, I'm so sorry." – He murmured, moved.

G let the little one to cry for a while holding her and caressing her hair, then he wipe out her tears with a batiste handkerchief and put it on Kamran's pocket. He kissed her again and taking her hand they walked together to the burial place where everybody was waiting.

A sigh of relief escaped from the team as they saw Callen approaching with the girl. Only Hetty keep her face serious at the sight of his pupil.

Kamran walked Callen to Sam's side, with the family, and she placed herself near her brother who put his arm around her.

As relieved as the rest, Sam stared at Callen piercing the sunglasses with his gaze and trying to read his friend grave expression. He could tell he had been crying, but there was something more… Breaking the eye contact Callen extended his hand and Sam instead of shaking it pulled Callen into a hug. He felt his close friend tensed up and, not wanting to embarrass him for continuing being the center of attention, he let him go with a pat on the shoulder. Tom Olsen started his discourse.

The sharp and painful jab he felt at Sam's touch and the warm liquid running down his back indicated Callen that the blister on the burn of his shoulder had opened. His eyes clouded over on the pain and the world around him became a distant scenario. To avoid the shaking of his hands to be noticed he interlace his fingers and lowed his head. With all his soul he concentrated on breathing just trying not to collapse.

G missed all the beautiful words that Michelle and Sam's friends dedicated to the family and he only react when the marines plied in triangle the American flag and offered it to Kamran who saluted the marine and hugged his dad crying. If the pain was bad, the sadness was immense. Dealing with emotions wasn't one of his strengths and now his compassion for the kids and Sam and the feeling of impotence and loss, were overwhelming. He only wanted to disappear, to go to the beach to try to find some peace, to get drunk, to sleep for days. But he looked at Sam with his son and daughter at his side, so stoic and so vulnerable, then at Kensi and Deeks holding hands and Eric crying on Nell's shoulder, Hetty who looked so fragile... His team, his family… they needed him. He needed to be the strong one. He promised once more to Michelle and to himself that he would keep Sam and the family safe, no matter what.

The sudden bangs of the honor salvo and the bugler's sad notes playing "Taps", were too much for Callen's damaged eardrum that started to buzz compromising his balance. He felt the world spinning even with his eyes closed, and his stomach seemed to be in a roller coaster. The pain didn't help either. For a moment he feared to be unable to control it, but his will was stronger than the vertigo.

From the distance Hetty had been observing Callen. She knew for sure that he was hurt. His parlor, his stiffness, his absent look behind the sunglasses, his slow reactions, probably he'd fooled everybody but not her. She took her cellphone and sent a text discretely.

Some minutes later Sam and his family walked to the stand to express their gratitude to family and friends, and soon the ceremony was over.

While people started to walk away from the grave and little groups were forming around Sam and the kids, Callen remained still, trying to gather enough energy to step aside. He knew he had to move before rising suspicious, but he was barely able to stand up as another wave of dizziness surprised him. On the verge of collapsing he could feel cold sweat run down his back, a ringing on his ears and a crawling sensation on his arms and legs. At this point he only hoped the sunglasses could hide his closed eyes while he prayed for the miracle of getting out the cemetery unnoticed.

-"At your three, twenty steps, Alfred has the back door open. Get in the car before you fell down, Mr. Callen."- instructed Hetty in low voice standing next to Callen.

– "Don't think. Go. Now."- She commanded.

At the order Callen reacted. He turned to his right and without raising his eyes from the grass he started to walk counting the steps and focusing on his balance. Nineteen, eighteen, seventeen, sixteen, fifteen, fourteen… a cramp on his back. He stopped and bit his lip trying to control the pain. Then he felt the reassuring presence of Hetty.

\- "Breathe Mr. Callen. That's it. Walk with me; I'm just at your side. Thirteen, twelve, eleven, ten… nearly there."

Callen was moving in autopilot thanks to Hetty's encouragements. The car, the salvation, was just a blurred spot in the distance. Why the hell he was feeling so bad? What was wrong with him? Nine, eight, seven, six… his back, again. He leaned forward, bent over with the pain and stopped, unable to move, ghostly pale. Hetty took his arm in a gesture that from the distance would be interpreted like friendly companionship.

\- "Sam is looking in our direction. If you don't get in the car in the next two seconds he will be here asking questions. Three more steps, Mr. Callen, just three more."- assured Hetty.

On the mere fact of hearing Sam's name Callen repressed a moan and started walking again, but his body wasn't responding. Just when he was about to fall, Alfred approached and took his hand like greeting an old friend, offering at the same time enough support to make him get into the back seat of the car where he finally passed out.

\- "Hospital or home?"- asked Alfred once installed behind the wheel.

\- "Get us out of here for now, let me check on him first"- said Hetty who was already loosening Callen's tie knot.

\- "No big open wounds, but his pulse is racing and he's running a fever. Do you have some water?"

\- "On the bar, next to the whiskey. There is some ice, too."

\- "Thank you Alfred."

Hetty wet her silk scarf and bathed G's face, then she made a little bag with the ice inside and placed it on Callen's nape. At the contact with the cold Callen came to, startled at first and relieved once he realized where he was. He closed his eyes again, exhausted and dizzy.

\- "Oh, no, Mr. Callen, you're not going to sleep on me. Here. Drink. Little sips."- ordered Hetty helping him with the water.

Some minutes and sips later, with the fresh air from the open window on his face and the ice still on his neck Callen was feeling better.

\- "Thanks Hetty."

\- "I only provided an escape plan, Mr. Callen."

\- "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

\- "…Get sick? c'mon. Any wound I need to know or you rather go to the hospital to be checked by a doctor?"

\- "No hospital, please. I'm just tired, too much action last days."

\- "Mr. Callen…"

\- "I think I may have a cracked rib, some scratches too… that's all, Hetty I swear."

\- "Ok, no hospital, head home Alfred, please, and you gentleman are staying with me until I consider you're ok."

Knowing better than arguing with Hetty, G finished the bottle of water, closed his eyes and rested the rest of the way home.


	12. Chapter 12

A.N.: Thank you to all the readers out there, specially to Amjm, countrygirl56, Petunia3116 for their feedback. I love you guys! Thank you for sharing the travel with me :)

Chapter 12

\- "Hey guys do you know where G is?"- asked Sam once he got rid of some compromises and could approach the team.

\- "He was right there just a moment ago"- commented Eric.

\- "I've seen him with Hetty just now, maybe he's accompanying her, she wasn't looking good."

\- "I'm going to my place with the kids, the Coronel and Michelle's mum and sister, you're welcome to come, there's food for an army."

\- "I don't know Sam, we don't want to intrude…"

\- "You're not intruding Kens, I'm inviting you."- insisted Sam.

\- "All right then"

\- "Good. See you in there. And bring my partner with you; he's not answering his phone." – said Sam departing.

\- "So… déjà vu, where the hell is Callen?"- asked Deeks again.

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Once at home, Kamran ran upstairs to change her clothes, she didn't like the black dress her grandma had bought for her. "It's a sad dress that makes me feel even sadder"- she thought. She chose some jeans, a sweater and sneakers and threw the dress on the chair. "Clonck!" It sounded like a stone hit the wood startling her, but nearly at the same time:

\- "Kaaaam"- called Aiden.

\- "Comiiiiing"

The house was full of people, all good friends mostly coming directly from the burial and some neighbors that where still shocked and asking questions very difficult to answer.

Sam tried by all means to remain calm and to be a good host, but he would have been lost without his team mates. Thanks to Nell's excellent memory able to remember each one choice, Deeks taking charge of the kitchen and Kensi and Aiden serving, everybody had diner.

Eric took advantage of Sam's distraction and sneaking into his friend's computer he reset the alarm system, reinforced the security and verified one by one all the cameras. Feeling better, he joined the others, but not before trying again to phone Hetty and Callen. Something happened and he was afraid.

\- "Still no answer?" – asked Nell discretely.

\- "How do you know?"

\- "Just for the way you look"

\- "No news means always good news, right Nell?

\- "I hope so, Eric, I hope so."- said the young agent holding her partner hand and wiping a tear off.

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\- "Really, Hetty, I feel much better now, I just need some ibuprofen and to sleep for a few hours."- explained Callen opening the fridge on Hetty's kitchen and helping himself a glass of orange juice.

\- "Maybe you're feeling better, but that doesn't mean that you're better. For God's sake, one hour ago you barely could walk!"

Callen drank the juice and served another glass.

\- "But now I can." – he answered nonchalantly as he swallow two tablets of the medicine and drank some more juice.

\- "Mr. Callen… I don't think that is a good idea… when was last time you ate something?"

\- "Honestly? I don't remember. What's for dinner…?" – started to ask Callen when suddenly he felt a sharp pain on his belly and he ran out the room.

Hetty's complaints about his stubbornness and the fact that an empty stomach doesn't agree with pills and acid, were drowned out by Callen's heaves coming from the bathroom. Leaning against the corridor wall she heard the flush of the toilet, the water running and then, the big clonk of Callen's fall.

\- "Oh bugger!"

Callen had a scare the moment he open his eyes and found Hetty's face at 20 cm of his. He was lying on his back on the big couch of the library. To the throbbing headache, the fever, the dizziness, the stiff and cramped muscles and the hurt at his back he could add an acute pain on his jaw.

\- "Arggggg"

\- "I know it hurts, my dear, but let me finish the stiches. Two more and you'll be ready."

\- "Hetty…"

\- "Schhh don't talk now." – she said raising a curve needle scaring Callen even more – "Alfred, please."

\- "C'mon kid"- intervened Alfred holding Callen's head, "Don't move; you have a deep cut on your chin that need to be closed."

Callen closed his eyes and tried to remain still when Hetty sewed another stich up.

\- "Please… "- he complained in pain.

\- "Just one more, promised."

\- "It hurts…"

\- "I never consider you a whiny Mr. Callen. Hold still."

Trying not to move Callen endured Hetty's ministrations and when she finally placed a white dressing over the wound he tried to sit up.

\- "Lay still for a while, you don't want you to get dizzy again, do you?"

\- "Please, my back… I can't…"

\- "Your rib?"

\- "Yeah… I was shot in the back…"

\- "Oh Lord, let me help you."

Completely dizzy, struggling to sit up without passing out finally Callen, elbows in knees, managed to hold his head still even while the world spun high speed around him.

\- "Try to control your breathing; I can nearly hear your heart from here!"

\- "I feel like shit, Hetty"- he confessed weakly.

\- "I can see that. You're suffering from a severe dehydration and you need fluids to restore your electrolyte balance. You know what it means."

\- "If the word stops spinning, whatever."

Hetty patted Callen's head and went out of the room only to come back some minutes later with an IV in a drip.

-"Shit"- murmured Callen when he felt the needle entering a vein on the back of his right hand.

He was still on the couch, now lying on his stomach after a battle to get rid of the shirt which was literally glued to the open burn on his back. Callen had invested all the remained energy he had in not crying out loud when Alfred removed the fabric from his raw shoulder. The pain let him shaky and completely worn out. He just wanted to sleep and wake up and realize that the last days have been a bad dream. But he had been through enough miseries in his life to know that happy endings only happen in fairy tales. Michelle. Sam. He felt tears on his eyes. No. He couldn't cry. He needed to be the strong one. Damn it. The IV burned.

Hetty could read Callen's thoughts. She knew that he was still trying to come to terms with Michelle's death, that he needed to feel strong and in control for Sam, but she also was aware that physically at this point only is pride and stubbornness were keeping him conscious. Seeing the angry bruise the bullet let and the cuts and burn on his back she wondered how he was able to endure the pain for so long. - "My tough cookie" - she thought with a hint of pride and then injected the content of a syringe in the IV's port. Enough was enough.

\- "Hetty…" – called Callen weakly when he realized what Hetty just did.

\- "I know, I know: you hate painkillers; but there's no point at suffering and you need to rest. Don't worry it's only a mild sedative to help you to relax."

\- "Sam..." –

\- "Sam is not going to call tonight and if he does I promise I'll cover for you."

\- "…"

\- "Schhhhh. Rest now, Mr. Callen, everything is going to be alright."


	13. Chapter 13

A.N.: Thank you again (and always) for the reviews. Are you ready for some anguish? ;)

Chapter 13

It was late, maybe too late for social gathering, but some of the Hanna family's friends were still at the house. Kamran went upstairs with her grandma long time ago; the poor kid was exhausted from the day and just after dinner she started to cry inconsolably in the way only overwhelmed pre-teenagers can do. Neither her father nor her brother could comfort her and the seasoned SEALS in the house were even more clueless. Finally it was her grandmother who leaded her to her bedroom. With all the unconditional love and tenderness that only a grandmother is able, talking to her from a hurt heart to another one, both women, the old and the young one, shared their sadness and sorrow.

Alone in the kitchen Sam was trying to maintain composure. He was sad, tired and worried and he couldn't decide in which order. Directly after the burial, family and friends went to the house to share a moment with him and the kids. He wanted to be alone, but at the same time he was grateful for all the good people that were a part of his life. He wondered again about G and Hetty. Something was going on and he wasn't happy to be left in the dark.

\- "Sam, do you have some ice?" – asked Deeks interrupting his thoughts.

\- "Yeah, in the freezer, right there."

\- "Wow! You really have food here for an entire army."- he commented taking out a big cake in order to reach the bag of ice.

\- "It must have been Hetty. She took care of everything. By the way, do you know where she and Callen are?"- asked Sam fixing his gaze on Deeks.

\- "No Sam, I've tried to contact them but their phones are off."

\- "Deeks if you're trying to hide something, sooner or later I'll know it."

\- "I swear, man, I don't know where they are, but I'm sure they have a good reason for not being here. Hetty seemed pretty tired before and I saw Callen walking her to the car arm in arm. I know that it's easy to say but try not to worry, ok? The ice - he added- "Kensi is waiting for it."

\- "Thanks Deeks."

Sam was angry. He couldn't understand G's absence. He was his best friend, he needed him more than ever and not only he arrived late to Michelle's burial, but he barely stayed till the end. His kids were asking for him, and he hadn't any answers. He wondered if Hetty had started an undercover operation. No, he knew she wouldn't do that. But on the other hand it was the only explanation. G promised him to be there for him, and now he knew his word was just rubbish.

In the bottom of his heart Sam knew that he was letting the fear to become rage, but at this point he could manage rage better than fear.

Back in the living room where only a few SEALS remained Deeks approached to his partner.

\- "Sam asked again for Callen"- he announced to Kensi giving her a glass of water full of ice–"he thinks I'm trying to hide something, and I can't blame him for it. What kind of friend is Callen, anyway?"

\- "A good one. Trust me. I know him."

\- "Well, what would you think if you were in Sam's shoes and your best friend doesn't go to your wife's burial?"

\- "That's no fair Deeks. Callen went to the burial, I'm sure he has a good reason for not being here now."

\- "I really hope he has the best excuse in the world."

People were starting to leave the Hanna's house. Sam and Aiden looked exhausted; it had been the saddest day in their lives.

\- "Nell, please, try again!"- begged Eric. He overheard Kensi and Deeks' conversation and he saw Sam's serious expression when he went out of the kitchen.

\- "Do you know what time is it, Beale? I can't phone Hetty well past midnight."

\- "But this is an emergency. Sam is going to kill me if I don't locate G and I've already tried everything in my power."

\- "Sam is not going to kill you and I'm sure that Hetty will phone us the moment she can."

\- "The moment she can or the moment she wants?"

\- "Let's go home Eric, it has been a long day."

\- "Home?"- asked Eric goofy- "what do you mean by home? Yours or mine? I can let you my Spiderman's pajamas whenever you want, anyway it fits better you than me…"

\- "Bealeee!"

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When Daniel arrived at Dovecoat to relieve Alfred, it was already one in the morning.

\- "Any news?" – asked the newcomer.

\- "The kid is here."

\- "For the night? Is Hetty ok?"

\- "Oh yeah, it's him who doesn't. He has a broken rib and scratches all over."

\- "Nothing serious then, he will be grumpy in the morning; you'll be able to beat him at chess."

\- "I bet that he'll wake up in some minutes to prepare his strategy. He's sleeping in the library"

\- "Wait, why is he downstairs?"

\- "He was dizzy and felt down, hurting his chin. Hetty sewed him up."

\- "Callen felt down?! Let's go check."

Both men showed their faces at the library door.

\- "He hadn't move."

\- "Since when?"

\- "Since… too long ago!"

Exchanging an alarmed look they walked over the couch where Callen was curled up. Daniel touched his forehead and taking the blanket off and pinching him in the arm, he announced:

\- "He's burning up and unresponsive. Call Hetty."

\- "But…"

\- "Quick!"

\- "No need gentlemen"- said Hetty entering the room- "Good night Daniel." she approached Callen who was completely oblivious to the trio, and touching him gentle on the face she confirmed the very high fever.

\- "He is unconscious"- affirmed Daniel.

\- "I see, but I need to know why. Could you please turn him on his other side?"

The two men moved Callen who didn't react at all. He was paler than the sheet that covered him and his skin was hot and clammy. When they turned his head they all saw the reason of his condition: it was blood on the pillow and Callen's left ear was festering.

\- "The dizziness wasn't just dehydration. Please take his pulse and try to low his temperature; I'm going to make some phone calls."- ordered Hetty.

Some minutes later Hetty entered in the room again.

\- "107,6o and 136 heart beats per minute" – announced Daniel alarmed.

\- "Do you want me to get the car to the door or you've called an ambulance?" - asked Alfred.

\- "Neither of them. I need you two to carry Mr. Callen to the white room and give him ampicillin intravenous as I prepare the autoclave."

\- "Hetty, you can't…"

\- "I've sent the helicopter to pick Dr. Costa up from San Diego, she is the best otolaryngologist of the West Coast. If we don't control the infection he risks a septicemia and with this temperature he can have a seizure anytime, so not time to lose gentlemen!"

Both men rushed out of the room to look for the gurney as Hetty caressed Callen soaked hair.

\- "And you Mr. Callen fight. Do you hear me? Fight!"


	14. Chapter 14

A.N.: Thank you for reading! here it goes another one!

Chapter 14

When Dr. Reyes Costa and his assistant arrived she was all business. Her display of activity contrasted with her short and chubby complexion. Her dark hair was tied back in a bun and she had bags under the black eyes. The guy seemed inhibited and still impressed by the helicopter and Hetty's house.

\- "Good to see you Reyes. Gentleman"- saluted Hetty shaking hands.

\- "My assistant, Tom Haddock. I hope you have a very good reason for getting us in a kamikaze flight at this time in the night Hetty."

\- "You know I always have one, my dear. But in this case I've just come ahead of time and provided you with a transportation service for your conference the day after tomorrow in L.A. in exchange for some example of your talent."

\- "You really don't do it for the love of it. Anyway where is she?"

\- "He. Follow me, please."

Callen was already installed on the operating table of Hetty's torture chamber as he used to call the well provided treatment room she set up some years ago. Still unconscious he wasn't aware of the cooler blanket that covered his torso, the heart monitor and the thermometer that Daniel just took from his armpit.

\- "The blanket is working, Hetty: 105,6."

\- "Still too high."- she answered.

\- "So there is the reason. I don't know if I want to ask why he's not in a hospital…" – asked without in fact doing it, the doctor. She took possession of the space in seconds and after washing and gloving her hands she started to check on Callen's ear with an otoscope.

\- "At this point it was easier if I'd made you come here, Reyes. Let's say he had a device in his ear when he was involved in an explosion two days ago. The other lesions are not relevant for his present state." – told Hetty.

\- "He has quite an infection here and I can see at least two foreign bodies embedded in spite of the swelling. I don't understand why he hadn't been treated before."

\- "I think he wasn't even aware of his condition."

\- "C'mon Hetty! You know how painful could be a simple otitis and he had the eardrum perforated, the middle ear like a pincushion and so much liquid that I doubt he could even remain standing. Nobody can't ignore this level of pain, believe me! "

\- "The only thing I can tell you is that the moment we knew it he was already burning up with fever."

\- "Whatever."– said Reyes a little bit suspicious- "Any allergies I must be aware of?"

\- "None."

\- "Good. I just hope for his shake that it isn't too late to control the infection before more damaged is done. At this point I can't guarantee he won't lose the hearing in this ear, hell I can't even guarantee his life if the infection has reach the blood or even the brain."

Not wasting time Tom and Daniel had prepared all the surgical instruments.

\- "I know you'll do your best, as always Reyes. Is there any way I can help?"

\- "Nothing for now. I'll let you know when we'll finish."

Sat on G's favorite couch on the library with her eyes closed and a now cold tea on her hands, the minutes seemed hours and the hours days to Hetty. Last days she felt like finally her age catch up with her. She was exhausted and devastated by the possibility of losing Callen, for not having realized before how bad he was hurt. It was her fault. The simple fact of him losing his hearing therefore his status as an agent was just unimaginable. In addition she felt terrible for not being with Sam and his family in this hard moment. And she knew that there were more problems waiting for her as the director Vance had announced. Not in vain she was responsible for releasing an international terrorist, spending a lot of public money, government resources and creating some chaos on L.A. streets.

\- "Can I get you something, Hetty?"- asked the ex-MI-6 agent.

\- "No, thank you, Alfred. I'm good, is the waiting that drives me crazy."

\- "The guest rooms are ready and Daniel has prepared everything the kid could need, even his favorite cookies. All this is my fault Hetty, for not checking on him before."

Hetty sighed and patted Alfred's hand.

\- "It's not, Alfred , it's not. And don't call him kid, you know how he gets"- she added.

\- "I won't the moment he stops acting like one."

The minutes turned into hours and each cuckoo of the clock made Hetty sank a bit more on the couch. Just when it was about to sing for the fifth time Dr. Costa went to the library and sat, exhausted, next to Hetty.

\- "Sorry for the waiting. I wanted to make sure he was completely stabilized and the fever under control before disconnecting the monitors. Your men and Tom are installing him in a bedroom. You had quite a fighter there, Hetty."

\- "I know. Can I offer you some tea while you tell me how it was, Reyes?"

\- "It's too early for breakfast? It smells delicious and operating always makes me hungry" - asked the doctor.

\- "Never is too early not too late for a good breakfast after a hard work, my dear."- smiled Hetty.

Both women went to the kitchen where an oven tray of chocolate chip cookies were cooling. A pot of coffee was prepared and generously served in two mugs. The fact that Reyes didn't elaborate only meant that the result of the operation wasn't a good one. Hetty knew she needed some time to fit together the words she wanted to say and she let her engulf a cookie before interrogating her with the gaze.

\- "I did my best Hetty, I really did. What could have been an easy operation when the damage was produced was a nightmare now. Too much swelling and the biggest infection I've seen in a long time. I succeed at extracting all the tiny pieces on the bones and to place them correctly. I took me quite a while to clean and drain the entire medium ear and I'm pretty sure the infection didn't spread to the inner ear. The eardrum was partially gone, although it will cicatrize once the infection subsides."

\- "But these are good news my dear!"- exclaimed Hetty.

\- "Well, yes, I guess. But as I told you before I don't know at this point if he's going to lose hearing. The damage is repaired, but now it depends entirely of the evolution. At this point he's not out of the woods yet, I don't understand why he is so severely dehydrated and why the infection was so extended."

\- "Let's concentrate on the solution now: what is the treatment? What can we do to keep him in good tracks?"

She took another cookie before answering:

\- "Antibiotics broad spectrum and specific. I gave him a bolus of amoxicillin intravenous and I want him hooked at the IV for at least four more days. Then he can take it orally for two weeks. Twice a day, for ten days, ofloxacin drops directly in the ear." – she seemed to think for a second and then added: "And painkillers, of course, also drops in the ear, the common ones like Tylenol will be useless. We can adjust the medication according to his response."

\- "Why on Earth you seemed so disappointed Doctor?"-asked Hetty surprised.

\- "You didn't pay my medicine studies to have this incertitude."

\- "Oh, sweetie. I've paid for your studies because you worth it, not expecting any results. I'm so proud of you! Now go to sleep, if the coffee and the cookies allow you, you can still get some resting hours."

Said that Hetty lead her pupil to one of the guest rooms and she installed herself at the rocking chair in Callen's bedroom to watch over his sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

A.N.: Your reviews and support are greatly appreciated. I'll try to answer everyone, thank you very much!

Chapter 15

Kensi woke up startled in the morning. It was late, nine already. Careful not to wake up Deeks she went downstairs where Monty happily received her moving his tail so fast that he seemed a fan. She petted him on the head and gave him his breakfast. The poor dog was starving.

Used to wake up around seven or even before in other circumstances Kensi would be grateful for the possibility of oversleep for two days on a row. The open door of the fridge prevented her for seeing Deeks coming.

\- "Good morning"- he said approaching from behind and kissing her lightly on the cheek –"why you let me sleep so much?"

\- "Good morning. I just wake up myself. Even if it's late we didn't sleep that much, we were at Sam's until one in the morning."

\- "Yeah, I could see that he was tired, but not in the mood for sleeping." -affirmed Deeks opening one by one the cupboards on the kitchen.

\- "I just hope he was able to rest. I can't even imagine how he is feeling these days."- said Kens – "and stop looking, there's not coffee, well, in fact we only have dog's food."

\- "Humm… what about if I treat my fiancée with a brunch at …let see… FIG in Santa Monica?- asked Deeks.

\- "I'd love it!"

\- "I know you love the lemon and ricotta pancakes."

\- "Yes, I love FIG's pancakes, but what I mean is that I love you saying my fiancée."- she said lending over the kitchen island and kissing Deeks on the lips.

\- "I love you."- said Deeks, kissing her more passionately.

\- "I love you too, but I'm starving and I would like to do something before going to Santa Monica."

\- "Something, something?"

\- "Not that something, silly, well at least not now."- she charmed him.

\- "Woof, woof!" – barked Monty.

\- "Yes, you're coming, but not boring programs on the radio, understood?"

\- "Woof, woof!"

Some minutes later Kensi was behind the wheel bearing a silly program on the radio as Deeks tried to justify again Monty's fixations.

\- "Listen Deeks, it's about time you buy your dog some headphones, I rather do not listen about menopause and hormones right now."

\- "Hey, you missed Santa Monica's exit!" – exclaimed Deeks signaling the sign in the highway.

\- "We're not going to Santa Monica"

\- "C'mon Kens! If you are mad with Monty we can let him with my mum, but you know that she would want to come with us, and I was thinking… "

\- "No, no, it's just that I need to check something before going."

\- "Care to share?"

\- "You'll see in no time"

In less than a quarter of an hour Kensi parked in front of Callen's house and Deeks understood. Both went out the car to the front door, but nobody asked at the knocking. Kensi tried to see something through the windows, but Deeks announced:

\- "His car is not here. I hope he had the decency to go to Sam's. Do you want to phone him?"

\- "No, no, I don't want to bother Sam today."

\- "But you're worried."

\- "Yes, Callen is still not answering the phone."

\- "He's a big guy, and frankly if he isn't able to stay with his friends in moments like this, the man has a problem."

\- "C'mon Deeks!"

\- "I'm just saying."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After taking his father to the airport and spending the morning cleaning the house, Sam was tired. Last day was one of the worst days in his life, nevertheless he only could feel grateful for the love displayed by family and friends. He was still wondering how his fellow S.E.A.L.S. could attend to the burial because he didn't phone anyone, in any case he felt loved and supported and the ceremony was just perfect. Exactly what Michelle deserved and a reason of pride for his children; their mother had died serving his country and they have a flag to remind them that forever.

Yesterday when finally everybody left he wasn't in the mood for tiding up, and it was too late to use the vacuum cleaner anyway. He couldn't gather the strength to sleep in his own bed, not without Michelle, not yet, and now his back was protesting for the night on the couch. He could understand why G would rather sleep in the floor. The kids went with their grandmother and aunt to a mall, the poor women wanted to spoil them and even if he wasn't very convinced of the utility of the method, he couldn't deny that little consolation. Now that he had some time for himself he realized that he didn't know what to do. He wasn't in the mood for joining the family, but he didn't want to be alone neither. Picking the phone he called G. No answer. He waited some minutes and tried again with the same result. He dialed Hetty's number without any hope and when he didn't get an answer he picked the keys of his car and drove to the cemetery feeling the weight of the loneliness in his heart.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

-"…"- G's soft moan made Hetty jump to his side. He was trying to reach his ear in a clear gesture of distress.

\- "Mr. Callen"- said Hetty taking his hand and touching his forehead still very hot. She renewed the cold compress and caressed his hair longer than usual.

\- "Hetty…" – he tried to get up, but Hetty's firm hand prevented him from moving his head.

\- "Schhh. Don't move. You gave us quite a scare Mr. Callen."

\- "What… happened?"- his voice sounded groggy, and his eyes were trying to focus.

\- "I guess your earpiece broke during the explosion and some remains damaged your eardrum and middle ear. You had surgery to repair the tissue, but you still have quite an infection."

\- "How…?"

\- "Not time for questions now. All you need to know is that if you behave and follow the treatment, some ear drops and antibiotics, you'll make a full recovery."- She observed Callen's expression and asked:

\- "How's the pain?"

\- "…"

\- "Mr. Callen?"

\- "Not too bad."- he said weakly.

\- "You know you need to rest"- said Hetty putting a syringe with a painkiller on the IV port.

\- "No! Please Hetty, don't! I'll try! "- seeing the fear in his eyes Hetty stopped and sighed:

\- "Just promise me you let me know if you feel worse."

\- "Promised"- answered Callen closing the eyes.

Some hours later G kept his promise. The drops in his very sensitive and sore ear made him scream in pain. The vertigo, the nauseas and the fever were the prelude of another very long night. Seeing Callen in such state made Hetty wonder if she took the good decision. Maybe he would be better in a hospital. The only thing she knew for sure was that if something happen to him she couldn't live with the guilt upon her shoulders.


	16. Chapter 16

A.N.: I'm absolutely overwhelmed by your kindness and support. You're great! I hope you enjoy this chapter, it was fun to write:)

Chapter 16

Merely some hours after saying goodbye to him Nell knocked at Eric's door. His first reaction of swearing eternal hate to the one who interrupted his sleep disappeared the moment he saw her partner crying.

\- "C'mon here"- he pulled her inside the house and made her sat on the couch- "what happen Nell? Are you ok? Are you hurt?"

The poor girl couldn't stop crying, but she denied with the head.

\- "Could a hug help?"

Nell threw herself into Eric's arms, still sobbing.

\- "Nell, you're scaring me, something bad happen, I mean something worse?"

\- "No, no, it's just… I couldn't sleep."

\- "A nightmare? I can lend you the Spiderman pajamas, they have superpowers, you know?"

Nell laughed tears still on her cheeks.

\- "Superpowers."- she repeated.

\- "Yes, I promise, Spiderman fight the nightmares for you and you can sleep. Really. I tested it myself."

\- "Thank you, Eric."

\- "Do you want to sleep? What about breakfast? Should I put the TV on? Or do you want me to call someone?

\- "Beale! Stop! I'll be fine. It's just that yesterday I felt that you guys are my family, I worked so hard to be part of this that now that it's about to happen I… I just don't want to lose my job."

\- "What? What are you talking about? Has someone told you something? If we need to hack the computer of some pencil pusher … "

\- "No, no not yet. But think Eric, I lay to navy officers. I backed up Hetty and Callen, I said that the SecNav had authorized Khaled's release and, even though I'll do the same one thousand times, I don't want to lose you."- she said as more tears escaped from her hazel eyes.

Eric hugged her again and caressed her hair as her head rested on his shoulder. Sam's tragedy had hit so hard that he was barely able to think in another subject. But of course, Nell with her beautiful mind was always some steps in advance. And now he was scared too. He didn't know if he would be able to do the same job without her. He was still trying to assimilate the implications of being a field agent, and he knew that if his main support in the office couldn't work with him anymore he probably quit as well. As Nate told him once there's no need to run when you're hurt. The ride can also be done step by step.

\- "Don't worry Nell. Don't think about it now. I'm sure that Hetty and Callen would fix everything and, anyway, these things take time. We have one more day off and I've downloaded the beta version of the "Pirates of the Galaxy". C'mon let's get some cereals. I have crunchy stars and coco pops and if you smile I let you put some sprinkles."

Nell, of course, smiled.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After a terrible night of pain, nightmares and vertigo finally Callen's fever broke at dawn. He was pale with dark circles around his eyes and the cheekbones noticeable under his skin, but the antibiotics started to work and the infection seemed controlled. He was a fighter, he just won the first battle, war wasn't over yet.

\- "Hetty"- called G without moving his head but opening his completely focused eyes.

\- "Are you ok Mr. Callen?"- she asked taking his hand between hers.

\- "I will the moment you go and rest."

\- "I'm fine, dear; it's you who need to rest."- his solicitude warmed her heart and she couldn't help to caress G's face.

\- "Ok, then I'll rest if you rest."

\- "Mr. Callen…"

\- "Hetty… You know that I can't rest with you looking at me and I guess you probably didn't sleep in days!"

\- "But you still have fever…"

\- "I'll be fine, Hetty."

\- "All right, but promise me that you'll call if you need anything."

\- "Promised"- answered Callen once more and closing the eyes again.

Hetty repressed the wish of petting him again and went out of the room. She was feeling, in fact, exhausted.

As much as he tried to sleep G couldn't. The constant dull ache on his left inner ear was rising, and to remain laid on the right side only worsened the pain on his rib. An hour later he finally desisted. With a groan that acknowledged the stiffness in his muscles, and his broken rib, Callen sat up, rubbed his face, and remembered that he was still hooked to the IV. He needed to relieve himself so he stopped the drip, took off the line from the catheter in his hand and swung to his feet, swaying somewhat. A bout of dizziness passed and he made his way to the enclosed bathroom without problems. Once he finished his business he confronted the image on the mirror and he didn't like at all the weak man he saw looking at him. The cut on his chin was a clean one and he admired Hetty's perfect work. No need to worry about a recognizable scar, he smiled. He felt sticky for the fever and the salt from the sweat made his wounds sting, so carefully he got rid of all the bandages and took a shower trying to keep the water temperature nearly cold. He paid special attention at not wetting the burn on his shoulder and not letting the water to wet the cotton that covered the wounded ear nor the catheter in his hand; in spite of the pain it felt good to let the water run on his body.

\- "How can I be tired just because of a shower?"- asked G to himself when he finished.

The effort was taking a toll, and he started to feel really weak. He dried himself, put a towel around his waist and started to brush his teeth. The noise of the water running and, above all, the buzzing of his ear, prevented him from hearing the knock on the door. G knew that he needed to be careful with his movements if he didn't want a vertigo attack. The knock on the door was now insistent as well as the voices calling him, he didn't hear a thing so when suddenly the door opened and an unknown tall man followed by a chubby brunette entered the bathroom he reacted the only way he knew and attacked the man knocking him with a kata under the chin and stabbing him with the toothbrush on the shoulder.

Callen could hear now the cries of the woman who helped the man out dragging him by the feet. The door was closed by a slam and Callen was left alone again. The surprise, the sharp cries and the worry about Hetty and the strangers on her house made G get dizzy. He tried to go out, but the door was blocked.

\- "What the hell?"


	17. Chapter 17

A.N.: It's a pleasure to share this story with you. Thanks for your comments :)

Chapter 17

The place was a pandemonium, at Reyes and Tom cries and calls Daniel and Alfred enter the room guns in hand followed by Saul who was that day the guard of the front door, ex agent Garcia with the radio ready to call for reinforcements, Lisa the housekeeping and finally, Hetty.

Callen was hearing noises and voices at the other side of the door, but he wasn't able to distinguish what they were saying. His ear was buzzing like crazy and the only thing that kept him standing was the adrenaline and the thought that Hetty could be in danger. He needed to open that door. The handler was definitely blocked from outside so he decided to loosen the hinges, but he couldn't find anything in the bathroom to do it. He considered for a moment to break the mirror and use a piece of glass only to set aside the idea, too dangerous to face Hetty afterwards. Then he saw it. He took the needle of his hand putting it flat in the slot of the screw he tried to use it as a screwdriver. The noises were getting louder, someone knocked on the door, and his head started to hurt.

When Hetty arrived at Callen's bedroom she couldn't believe the scene before her eyes. Her employees were in combat mode ready to use their weapons; Tom was on the floor screaming out loud bleeding from a wound made by… what was that? at toothbrush? Reyes was trying to calm him as she kept blocked the door with a chair.

\- "Ladys, gentlemen, what is happening here?"

Everybody started to talk at the same time, seven versions of the same fact. She sighed:

\- "I see. Please gentlemen, lower your weapons and come back to your occupations. Daniel, could you please help Mr. Hadock here to go to his room?"

\- "Hetty, you didn't tell me that you were protecting a criminal!"- exclaimed Dr. Costa out of her wits.

\- "Mr. Callen is one of my employees, dear."

\- "An employee? A beast! He attacked us for God's sake! The poor Tom."

\- "I'm sure there's a reason, Reyes, if you let me open the door…"

\- "What? No, Hetty he is dangerous, I'm not letting you in there."

At this point Hetty was more worried about Callen that amused by the situation.

\- "Reyes I assure you that the only person probably in danger here is at the other side of this door."

She knocked the door and called:

\- "Mr. Callen!"

But the only answer was a metallic noise, a clink of something little falling.

\- "Mr. Callen!"- she called again. Then she understood. She went to the desk, took a piece of paper and a pen and she wrote something.

\- "What are you doing Hetty?"

\- "I'm asking Mr. Callen to surrender"

\- "In Russian? Is he a spy? Oh, God. Should we call the police?"

Hetty passed the paper under the door and immediately the scratches ceased.

\- "C'mon, darling, I'm not in danger"- she said showing the doctor her gun- "Could you please go downstairs to check on Mr. Hancock? I'm sure he will appreciate your help."

Once the doctor went out, Hetty opened the bathroom door.

Callen was standing at the other side with just a towel around his waist, looking pale and confused and bleeding for the needle site on his hand.

\- "Are you ok Hetty?" – he asked worried.

\- "Yes, Mr. Callen, I am. I cannot say the same about you. You promised me to stay in bed!"

\- "No, I promised you to call if I feel worse and if I needed anything. I was just fine until some intruders decided to attack me!"

Hetty rolled her eyes.

\- "Sometimes you're just..." –she sighed when she saw Callen's confused expression and added- "I suggest you put some clothes on. I'll come back in a minute."

When Hetty come back she didn't do it alone. Callen was sat on the bed holding his head trying to hide the fact that he was in pain. Reyes stared at him from the entrance, still apprehensive.

\- "Mr. Callen"- called Hetty from the door, but when G didn't hear her she approached and gently took his hand. He barely moved when Hetty cleaned the dried blood and put a band-aid on the spot where the catheter was. He even let her to examine the stitches on his chin without protest.

\- "You didn't lose your touch, Hetty."- he said looking at her with a lopsided smile.

\- "Flatterer!"

Reyes was astonished. It was the first time she saw Hetty acting like a mother and the raging lunatic animal that attacked her assistant seemed tamed.

\- "Dr. Costa, let me to introduce you to Mr. Callen properly. Mr. Callen this is Reyes Costa, the doctor who operated on you last night."

\- "I can't say it's nice to meet you" – said Reyes still from the distance.

\- "It's your friend ok?" - asked Callen who was starting to shiver.

\- "He will be. You nearly kill him!"

\- "No, I don't. If I'd have wanted to kill him I'd have stabbed in the eye or in the heart"- said Callen defensively- "Hetty you have to believe me! I'd never kill someone in your house unless it's strictly necessary. I know how difficult can be to get rid of the body."

\- "Ejem… Mr. Callen, no need to elaborate."

But G didn't replied, the pain on his inner ear has starting to increase and he couldn't help touching his ear.

\- "That bad eh?"- asked Hetty – "Reyes could you…?"

\- "Ok. Lay down on your side and let me check on you."

Callen didn't have much choice. When he adopted the hated position he felt the cotton removed and something cold painfully exploring his swollen inner ear. He couldn't hear anything but the buzzing that made him dizzy; then he felt the first drop. At first too cold, suddenly too hot and then burning and stinging like hell. He tried to move, but Hetty's hand prevented him from doing so. The pain hadn't subsided when he felt one by one the other four drops. The world started to spin, his blood pressure drop and in seconds he was miserable and literally shaking. Comparing to this new pain, the IV on his arm and the burn from the antibiotic in his vein was nothing. The following hours were just torture for G.

It was already late in the afternoon when Callen's vertigo subsided, letting him completely worn out.

\- "Hetty…"-called G weakly.

\- "I'm here Mr. Callen"- she said changing again the wet compress on his forehead.

\- "I need a phone. I need to call Sam."

\- "I don't think a phone it's a good idea for you right now. The noises near your ear can make the vertigo return as well as the light of the screen. I'm sure that Mr. Hanna will understand."

\- "Please Hetty"- he begged in a voice so tiny and on the verge of tears that she knew she couldn't deny him anything.

Sometime later Alfred entered the room:

\- "Are you awake, kid?"

\- "Where's Hetty?"

\- "Dr. Costa accompanied her to her room. She nearly collapsed of exhaustion." – seeing the alarm in Callen's eyes he quickly added- "Don't worry G, she just need to rest. She gave me this for you."- he said extending him a cellphone with a duplicate of his sim card.

\- "Thanks Alfred. Please take care of her."

\- "That's exactly the same thing she tell me about you. Be good and try to sleep."

The moment he was left alone G made the phone call.


	18. Chapter 18

A.N.: Too many expectations... please don't kill me! ;) Thank you for reading

Chapter 18

\- "Hello Sam."

\- "G! Finally! Where're you?"

\- "At Hetty's."-he cleared his throat in an attempt to sound stronger than he felt.

\- "I've phoned you one thousand times! I was more than worried, buddy!"

\- "I know, I know, I'm really sorry, Sam. I've lost my phone, and I've just got a new one."

\- "Everything ok?"

\- "Yeah."- he said sighing-"It is now."-He paused and asked the question that hunted him: -"How're you Sam?"

\- "I don't know. Hard to say. The sky is blue, the birds sing, my kids are wonderful, family, friends… everything is good, but I feel like the day after a tornado. I can't say I'm good. I am like a spoiled child that has everything, but the only thing he really wants is the only thing he can't have."

\- "You need time."- G didn't know what else to say.

\- "The kids missed you yesterday and the Colonel came back to NY this morning."

\- "I'm sorry, Sam. Please tell them that I wished I could have been there. I did everything in my power, believe me when I tell you that the last thing I wanted was to worry you."

There was such anguish in G's voice that Sam didn't insist in his reproach.

\- "Is Hetty with you?"

\- "She is resting now, I tried to convince her before, but finally she followed doctor's orders. If you need to speak to her..."

\- "G, is she ok?" - asked Sam suddenly alarmed.

\- "Exhausted; it hasn't been easy for her taking care of everything, not too much sleep lately."

\- "I wanted to thank her, but I'll do it tomorrow if she's better. You sound pretty tired too."

\- "I am, you know, I'm allergic to doctors. But not as much tired as you I guess."

\- "Yes; as you said I need time. I was thinking about doing a trip with Aiden and Kamran before the new school year begins. Hawaii maybe."

\- "I think that's a great idea. They need you Sam, more than ever, and you also deserve some time off."

\- "It would be nice if you can join us some days."

\- "I'd love that. But right now..."

\- "Ok, don't worry. We'll talk about it later. Take care of her G."

\- "I'll do my best. You too take care, Sam."

\- "See you soon."

\- "Bye."

When G hung up the phone all the tension that kept him awake left his body and he felt completely drained. The constant discomfort and the hated IV didn't help him to relax; nevertheless he laid down on his bed and tried his best to sleep. He was glad Sam seemed to understand his absence even without asking questions. He was a good friend, the best one. Some minutes later G was blessed with Morpheus' visit.

At first Sam was so relieved to hearing from G that he didn't think twice about the conversation, but sometime later when the sleep didn't come in spite of the tiredness, he started to hash things over and he felt abandoned by his best friend. Alright, Hetty overdid with the burial's preparative and she collapsed of exhaustion, he understood G's worriedness and the fact that he took care of her, but Hetty had her staff and even when she was hurt in Romania G didn't spent all the time with her. He felt selfish and guilty for being selfish and alone and sad and angry for feeling that way. Finally overwhelmed by all the feelings and his own contradictions Sam cried until he run out of tears.

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Next day Callen woke up late but in better shape. His ear still hurt, but the hard soreness in his muscles had worked down to a dull ache. Good. He disconnected the IV, tidied up, put a T-shirt and shorts sat on the desk and checked the phone. More than fifty messages and missed calls in three days mostly from his team, probably a new record. He dialed and being careful with the volume of the phone he waited anxiously.

\- "Oh gosh! You really know how to drive people crazy! What happen with the "I'll phone you?" I didn't know if I should start looking for your body or to kill you myself if I found you alive!"- she was worried, mad and excited at the same time.

\- "I'm sorry Anna."

\- "I really hope you have an excuse."

\- "I guess I have one."

\- "You ok?"

\- "Now yes."

\- "Listen, you leave me with a body in my truck, the task of keeping track of a low cost arm dealer and you disappeared! Even Sam called me and I was just so… if you're not going to tell me anything I don't know why you bother to call…"

\- "I'm sorry, I don't know what else you want me to say. We need to meet. Please!"

He heard Anna cursing in Russian and then she sighed and said:

\- "At six at your place. No bodies, no terrorist, no tricks."

\- "Same hour, I'll text you the address, no bodies, no terrorist and no tricks, just me, promised."

\- "You own me big time, you know?"- she said calmer now.

\- "I'll do my best to compensate you. Thank you Anna."

G felt relieved, last thing he wanted was to lose Anna, now more than ever he needed her.

Then he thought about the conversation with Sam. He maybe could do something to push him a little bit to do that trip. Smiling he made a phone call.

The missing calls, the messages, he didn't feel like talking to Kensi or Deeks, however he could let them know that he was ok. Entering the code on his cellphone he activated his tracker. He was sure that Eric and Nell would see it and definitely they'll pass the message.

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First thing in the morning Nell phoned Hetty and for her surprise a woman with Hispanic accent answered the phone. She presented herself as Hetty's doctor and in a bossy tone she confirmed Hetty's exhaustion and asked her not to disturb her patient sleep. Somewhat reassured Nell phoned Kensi, Sam and Eric.

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The alarm took Eric by surprise. Callen's GPS was active and working! He was at Hetty's, logic he wanted to take care of her, so all good. Relieved, he texted Nell, Kensi, Deeks and Sam the consoling news.

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Cautiously Callen went downstairs, the movement sensor alerted Daniel who appeared from behind the stairs ready to use his weapon.

\- "Good morning to you too, Daniel" – said Callen.

\- "What do you think you're doing G?"

\- "Going to the kitchen? Where's Hetty?"- he asked walking the corridor.

\- "She's in her room, resting. She'll be fine in no time."

\- "Good."

\- "You've fever Callen."

\- "How do you know?"

\- "Your eyes; they're shining"

\- "They're shining at you"- he replied quick mocking the older man with a wink.

\- "Don't be silly! And don't walk barefoot! Listen, go to the library, I'll bring you the damned tea, if Hetty figure out that you are here we both will have a problem."

G went to the library without arguing, he was annoyed for being treated like a child, it was just ridiculous, but when Daniel entered the room with his favorite tea and homemade cookies he felt appreciated and loved. That was more than his own father had done for him since he could remember. Finished the tea he was about to bring the cup to the kitchen when he felt the terrible buzzing and all of a sudden his body turned in jelly. Daniel arrived just in time to prevent him from falling and gently helped him to lay down on the couch. G's stomach filled for the first time in days didn't agree with the vertigo and a wave of nausea made him bent over.

\- "Ahhhhh! – he cried in pain and protest as he felt the sharp prink of the injection in his tight.

\- "Phenergan" – said Daniel –"you'll thank me later".

He was barely conscious when Sam called him and he continued to collect missing calls from his team mates. The drops, the antibiotic and the fever let him so worn out and sored that he was nearly thankful when he received Anna's text in the afternoon:

\- "You were right, I could have something, talk to you tomorrow. xx"

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When Sam received the call he thought that in other circumstances he would be one of the happiest men in the world. The private jet that took him to the safe house was available late in the afternoon to bring him and his family wherever he wanted. The kids were so excited that the suitcases were ready in minutes. Hoping that G could join them he phoned him, but his silence was becoming a habit.

That night the Hanna's family slept in the Hilton Hawaiian Village Waikiki Beach Resort.


	19. Chapter 19

A.N.: I know some of you are disappointed, but this is not over yet! Thank you for reading and being there :)

Chapter 19

At 4am a big noise coming from the library awoke everyone on Hetty's house. Alfred followed by Hetty entered the room full alert gun in hand and fearing the worse, just to discover Callen wearing only his boxers and the armor's helmet.

\- "What the hell are you doing, kid? I nearly shoot you, for God's sake!" – exclaimed the ex-agent.

\- "Just wondering what the camera Hetty installed in here is getting through the visor. You should be grateful Alfred, I've found a blind spot"- answered G taking the helmet off.

\- "You better fix that before sun rises or I'll …." – cried Alfred unable to find comical the situation.

\- "C'mon Alfred, come back to sleep. I'll take care of Mr. Callen"- said Hetty barely keeping from laughing.

\- "You spoiled that kid, I'm telling you Henrietta"-

\- "I'm not a kid anymore, Alfred, but you're still a grumpy old man" – said G being provocative.

\- "Lippy boy"- murmured the man going back to his room.

\- "I'll fix the armor, promised!"- cried Callen

\- "Oh no, not now. Here, put this on – she said handing him a black Chinese robe – you don't need to catch cold with an infection and a broken rib."

\- "龙, long, dragon"- Callen read and translated the inscription from the front pocket of the robe.

\- "Since when do you know Chinese?"

\- "Still learning. Too complicated."

\- "Indeed. 你想和我一起去喝茶？Nǐ xiǎng hé wǒ yīqǐ qù hē chá? Do you care to join me for a tea? I don't think I could be able to sleep now."

\- "Sorry Hetty"

\- "Don't be. I wasn't sleeping anyway. How are you feeling Mr. Callen?"

Callen thought for a moment his answer:

\- "Sad."

\- "We all are, my dear. But I mean physically."

\- "Hungry."

\- "I can see why Alfred wants to strangle you"- said Hetty heading to the kitchen.

\- "He has violent tendencies, Hetty, in your place I'd sleep with the gun under the pillow"- mocked Callen following her.

\- "I already do."

Some minutes later sat on the kitchen table with the rest of a light breakfast he couldn't be able to finish, G was trying to find the words to proclaim and reclaim his independence.

\- "Just say it Mr. Callen, I can hear the engine of your brain turning!"

\- "Ok then. I need to come back to work as soon as possible Hetty. I mean, today."

\- "Oh dear! You had surgery barely three days ago! Are you aware of how close I've been to losing you? Even without your damaged ear you won't be able to come back until your rib is completely consolidated and that means two months if you are lucky. Then you'll have to pass your physical test to recuperate the status of active agent. You know the drill, Mr. Callen."

\- "Yes I know, but you also know that this is not over, that you'll probably go to Washington soon, that without Sam and me the unit is incomplete and that we can't be replaced by tomorrow."

\- "Well, anyway I don't think Director Vance is going to allow us to operate for much longer."

\- "Hetty, please, I'm not asking it for me, I just need… to be near the team. Maybe to do some research. I won't be out of the operation's center, and you know that me being there even doing paperwork, will reassure Eric and Nell if they have to go on the field. Please Hetty, it's my team!"

\- "What about your treatment? You know you can't leave it halfway."

\- "Your rules, Hetty. I promise I'll accept whatever you want if I can come back today."

Hetty knew that he was right. His presence would be the anchor the team needed, but she couldn't allow him to put his health, his life at this point, in risk for an impulse. She thought for a moment and then said:

\- "Rule number one: I'll administer your treatment. When I call you, you come. No argues. Rule number two: you'll rest. You'd fever, you stop. You're in pain you stop, you feel sick, you stop, you lose an eyelash you stop." - G sighed.

\- "Rule number three: not driving. Rule number four: no weapons."

\- "Hettyyyy!" – protested Callen.

\- "Rule number five: you'll pass a medical exam each week. Rule number six: rules one to four depend on the results of rule number five."

\- "But Het…"

She raised a hand stopping his protest.

\- "This is not a negotiation Mr. Callen. And believe me, these rules are more than reasonable, giving the circumstances." – she said offering her right hand.

Callen shook it, giving up.

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Deeks turned his head again on the pillow. He was sweating and babbling and suddenly he woke up confused, waking Kensi up with a startling.

\- "Hey hon, are you ok?"- she asked touching his face.

Deeks didn't answer, he felt an anguish hard to describe. Getting up without a world he locked himself in the bathroom.

\- "Deeks, Deeks open the door, please."- Kensi could hear Deeks crying at the other side. –"C'mon baby, it's just a dream."- she waited some more –"Deeks if you're not opening this damned door I'm gonna use your surf board as a jimmy!"

The door opened and Deeks appeared with puffy eyes. He had been crying.

\- "Don't you dare to touch my board."- he said hugging Kensi.

\- "What is this about, Deeks?"- she murmured on his ear still holding him.

\- "I don't… I don't want to talk about it, really."

\- "What happened with our no more secrets?"

\- "Kens…please..."

\- "Look at me. I'm here, with you, as you are here for me. In the good, in the bad and in the worst. No matter what. No secrets."

Deeks sighed and sat on the bed feeling cold all of a sudden.

\- "It was like being there again, running against the clock searching for Michelle." – Kensi sat at his side and took his hands with hers. – "This time we were good, Khaled was in prison and we found the container. You shot the door open and Michelle was there, but when I held her she was a skeleton laughing with Khaled voice."

\- "Oh God. Come here."- said Kensi hugging him again. –"I know is hard, but the more we talk about it the better. Now we have to focus in Sam. I can't even imagine how he's feeling."

\- "I know exactly how he feels. The same way I use to feel when your life was pending of a damn percentage. The only difference was hope, the hope he doesn't have."- said Deeks with the tears returning to his eyes.

\- "I love you with all my heart." – she found his mouth and kissed him long and slowly, trying to shoo the ghosts from his soul.


	20. Chapter 20

A.N.: Thank you again and again for this journey together :)

Chapter 20

It felt weird for G to be in the mission, but somehow it felt right at the same time. Eric nearly made him fallen with his big hug and Nell bombarded him with questions about Hetty's whereabouts and health that he really didn't understood.

\- "Good morning! Miss Blye a word please!" - Hetty commanded as she saw Kensi and Deeks on the corridor.

When Deeks entered the bullpen G was helping himself a coffee. He had just received a text to meet Anna in the boathouse in some minutes and he was excited and anxious at the same time. He didn't hear Deeks'call:

\- "Callen! Callen! hey Callen!- he repeated this time grabbing his arm. G gasped in surprise and pain, Deeks had just pressed the catheter hidden by the sleeve of his shirt and the needle pinched the vein.

\- "Damn!"

\- "Hey man! what's wrong with you?"

\- "What do you want Deeks?!"- protested Callen leaving the mug on the table and touching his forearm.

\- "I don't know just to say hello and ask you if it was so difficult to make a call to your friends."- he accused.

\- "Hello; and yes it was difficult." - said G automatically regretting his answer; cursing his bad luck he dribbled Deeks and went out to assess the damage in private.

\- "Do you know what the hell is wrong with Callen?" – asked Deeks to Kensi who just arrived to her desk.

\- "I haven't seen him. All I know is what Hetty told me before her phone rang. Apparently he had lost the status of active agent. He must be pissed off."

\- "Well, not more than me!"

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When Anna went in the boathouse G welcomed her with a hug. It was so unlike him that she knew he was really worried about her.

\- "Someone missed me?"- She saluted

\- "In fact I did"- he said kissing her gently.

\- "Where have you been, Callen? You look like you haven't eaten in days!"

\- "Long story. I tell you everything when you tell me what you got."

\- "Straight to the point, eh?"

They both sat on the big table and Anna started to put some pictures on.

\- "Your two teenager friends: Yamal Elmahdi and Francis Bacon." – G raised the eyebrows. -"Yes, I know, but it's his real name. I've checked. Yamal is still recovering in a center for young refugees and Francis has been kind of busy lately."

\- "They are inoffensive"- commented Callen discarding the pictures.

\- "Tu amigo Ramón Hernández, and …"- she put the picture of a Hispanic and a black man on the table – "his friends who looked for him at Little Ethiopia for two days."

\- "This guy, in the back… it looks familiar"- said Callen signaling the person who was behind the Mexican guy in the picture and trying to find the reason in his head.

\- "Well, they aren't in any database I could find, you know that my access is limited, but an African American guy with a Hispanic one… I think is worth to have a look."- Anna paused for a moment and announced - "I've another surprise for you"- she produced another picture – "Meet my new friend Aran Mafur."

G took the picture slowly he seemed to be studying it for a while and suddenly he got up and exploded:

\- "What the hell were you thinking?" – he asked trying to control his anger.

\- "I was doing exactly what you asked me to do."- she said defensively.

\- "I didn't ask you to get that close to the man! This could be very dangerous."

\- "Well, in that case you could have come with me, and just for information, this is my job. Silly of me, I thought you'd be happy."- she replied angrier.

\- "Anna, is not what you're thinking…"

The screen on the table turned on and Hetty's face lighted up the table.

\- "Mr. Callen!"

\- "Hetty. Not now."

\- "I thought that we had a deal Mr. Callen"- she said opening the door.

Anna put quickly the pictures away as Hetty made her appearance on the room.

\- "Miss Kolcheck. Good to see you, dear."

\- "Hi Hetty."

\- "Mr. Callen the sooner we start, the sooner we finish."

Reluctantly G sat on the couch and offered his arm to Hetty and said to Anna:

\- "Please, stay"- She sat at his side not knowing exactly what was going on.

\- "Where's the catheter?"- asked Hetty.

\- "Gone."

\- "I see that."- she said searching for a vein.

\- "Please Hetty, can you just inject the damned thing without the IV?- Callen was losing his patience.

\- "Yes, indeed, it's your choice, however it's less painful mixed with saline. A little prick. You know that this one can't be done quickly, don't you?"

Callen bit his lip and took Anna's hand with his free one. That was his way of telling her the truth even if he hated to be seen so vulnerable. Anna understood and squeezed his hand in appreciation.

\- "Are you doing good Mr. Callen?" - asked Hetty seeing him paler than before.

\- "Just go on Hetty".- he said eyes closed and head on the back of the couch.

If the ten minutes injection pushed G to the limit of his resistance, the drops on the still much sored ear knocked him down.

Anna was appalled to seeing him in so much pain and she guessed she had missed the worst of it the previous days.

\- "Hetty… What just happen?"

After a brief summary of Callen's condition Hetty said goodbye with a -"Take care of him, my dear."

Some hours later Callen wake up with a moan thinking he was alone. He touched his ear still hurting and sat up with difficulties biting his lip when the broken rib made itself noticed and the skin on his shoulder stretched. Anna was watching him from the other side of the room more than worried.

\- "Are you hungry?"- she asked –"Because I got tuna sandwich, and a salad, but then I thought that you don't like salads and I get a soup and fruit and…"

\- "Anna, I'm fine"- smiled Callen approaching her.

\- "No, you don't, and you scared me to death. It's my fault if you got worse, I could…"

\- "It's not your fault and you could have done nothing. I needed to be with Sam that day even if it was my last thing to do in this life."- he said combing her hair out of her face and kissing her lightly on the forehead.- "And, in fact I'm hungry."

Once Anna ate and Callen played with his food trying to hide the fact that he wasn't hungry at all, they come back to the pictures. G looked attentively the one with the two mysterious man in the car.

\- "Ok. Describe me the conversation with Aran Mafur."

\- "He called two days after your encounter with the boys. He was bossy, demanding, he wanted to meet and a sample of what we got."

\- "How did he sound?"

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "His accent. Was he American?"

\- "No, no, definitely. He sounded African, I'm pretty sure his first language is not English, but he speaks it fluently."

\- "Arabic? Do you think he may be Sudanese?"

\- "I can't say, I don't know, I'm not familiar with Arabic accents, sorry."

\- "It's ok. So he asked for a sample and you met."- Callen sighed.

\- "I was in the building behind, hiding with my camera. I sent Boris with an AK47"- she smiled.

\- "You sent Boris? Really? He doesn't speak English! Did your fa… Arkady knows?"

\- "He knows that I was hatching something, but he spoiled me. Anyway the man seemed satisfied and wanted more. Boris played along and he asked him to call again. I think that even if Mr. Mafur doesn't understand Russian the message was clear."

\- "He doesn't sound very professional to me." – Callen paused massaging his temples- "Where did you take that picture?"- he asked picking once more the one with the men in the car which was intriguing him.

\- "I took it from my hiding place. They were sneaking by, when Boris and my new friend talked."

Callen looked tired, fever rising again.

\- "At this point I only see two choices: this can be either an amateur trying to close a small deal or just the point of an iceberg."


	21. Chapter 21

A.N.: Thank you as always for your nice comments :) I hope you'll continue to enjoy the story.

Chapter 21

G didn't sleep well that night. Nightmares haunted him each time he closed the eyes and adding to the equation pain, fever and Hetty's mother hen attitude, the result was all the anger he was feeling.

\- "Mr. Callen, you promised!"

\- "I was forced to agree with a check-up, Hetty, but you didn't tell anything about going to the hospital."- G was furious.

\- "And that would have been the case if you haven't stabbed the doctor with your toothbrush!"

\- "How many times do I have to apologize?!"

\- "A life apologizing wouldn't be enough"- Hetty murmured trying to find some remaining patience.

\- "What?"

\- "Mr. Callen, walk before me!"

Callen fixed his steeled and defiant gaze on Hetty. He was anxious, tired and afraid of the results. He knew that sooner or later he had to give in to Hetty's commands, but he wasn't going to make things easy for her.

\- "I tell you Hetty, you've seen my arms, I've not a single spot without a hole or a blue; I'm not letting anyone to poke me with a needle."

\- "I'm not repeating this. Get. In. The. Car."

At the hospital Hetty was pleased to confirm that G's infection was subsiding thanks to the effect of the antibiotics and Callen was switched to the intramuscular version for three more days to his dismay, nevertheless she had to handcuff him in order to allow the nurse to do the task. She was getting old for dealing with his rebellion.

On their way to the office Callen started to search through the small glove compartment of the Jaguar.

\- "Mr. Callen! Stop bending your head like that if you don't want to cause yourself a vertigo attack! What are you looking for, anyway?"

\- "My lollipop." – said a pale Callen going into a mood- "If the shot hurts Sam gives me one. Besides I need some sugar."

\- "Today is not sugar what you need"- muttered Hetty.

\- "What?"

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Since Hetty ordered it the N.C.I.S. L.A. unit was ruling on the minimum staff. That seemed to agree with the two techs that completely owed the operation center.

\- "We have just few minutes before anyone can detect us. Are you ready?"- asked Eric typing fast on his computer. He was feeling bold breaking the rule of not using ops for personal purposes.

\- "We're not Eric! You know the first question Sam will ask will be about Callen, so if you don't know the answer, don't connect."- said Deeks earning a punch from Kensi. – "Ouch!"

\- "Too late"- said Eric – "Hello Sam!"

The big screen illuminated and the Hanna family appeared suddenly. Sam was holding the tablet and the kids were behind him making funny faces.

\- "Hi guys."- saluted Sam.

\- "Hiiiii" – they answered clumsily from ops.

\- "Where is G?"

\- "I told you"- murmured Deeks at Kensi's ear- earning another punch. This moment Nell entered in ops just in time to hear the question.

\- "Hello Sam, hey you two! G is with Hetty at the hospital."

\- "Is she ok Nell?"

\- "Routine check- up, I've just talked to her, nothing to worry about, they are in their way here."

\- "How are you Sam?"- asked Kensi.

\- "Already regretting being here with these two! Hey, would you stop, please?"- he said to his kids in a tone more acquiescent that angry.

\- "Hello Kensiiiii!" – said Kamran sticking out his face from behind her father's arm.

\- "Hi sweetie!"

\- "I see that you are not bored Sam!"- said Deeks smiling and waving his hand to the girl who waved back.

\- "Sometimes I wish!"

\- "Hey Deeks" – intervened Aiden- "Why don't you guys come here and teach me some surf?"

\- "Aiden for once you had a great idea"- said his sister.

\- "That would be awesome!"- exclaimed Eric.

\- "Yeah, anyway we don't have much work in here, and we all have pending holidays."- explained Kensi.

\- "If you can come I'll be eternally grateful"- said Sam rolling his eyes at the explosion of cries of his children.

The door opened and G entered the room. He wasn't expecting to see his partner and the kids on the screen.

\- "G!"- exclaimed Sam. He couldn't see his friend properly being in the back of ops.

\- "Hello Sam, hi guys! Are you ok?"

\- "Uncle Callen! Are you coming?"- interrupted Kamran.

\- "G, is Hetty alright?"- asked Sam regaining the control of the tablet.

\- "At this moment very upset."

\- "Why?"

\- "I guess I pissed her off."

Everybody laughed at the occurrence.

\- "Sam let us know if you need anything!"- proposed Nell.

\- "We're good Nell, thanks."

\- "Hey guys, we need to cut, we're exceeding the time"- said Eric -"Talk to you soon. I'm sending you a video of the best Hawaiian surfer Aiden!

\- "Coooool"

\- "See you soon!"

\- "Bye."

The screen went black and Sam's image disappeared letting everyone in the room with a silly smile. It was good to see his friend.

\- "Callen!"- Kensi hugged G who tensed anticipating the pain.

\- "Kens, good to see you."

\- "What happened to your chin?" she asked touching him lightly at the side of the bandage.

\- "I felt down."

Everybody laughed again taking Callen's answer as a joke.

\- "So, no cases?"- asked G somewhat confused about the reaction of the team.

\- "No new ones. I think the order is coming from Washington. What did you do to upset Hetty?"- said Eric nonchalantly.

\- "Just being me"- He sighed kind of sad. Without further explanation G went downstairs ruminating what Eric said and thinking about Sam.

When G opened his laptop Kensi's pencil rolled to the floor. His first instinct was to bend down and pick it, but the stabbing pain in his back prevented him from doing it.

\- "I got it"- said Kensi taking the pencil- "Sorry about the mess."

\- "I'd worried if your desk was clean."- smiled Callen trying to hide his discomfort.

\- "Your back. You're still sore from the shot, aren't you?"

\- "More than sore and very mad: I can't be on the field."

\- "Well, take it as a holiday. You can join Sam and the kids in Hawaii and sunbathe a bit."- she said remarking how pale Callen was.

\- "As much as I would like to do that I couldn't right now. Hetty…"

\- "Is she ok, Callen? Is agent orange …?"- she asked alarmed.

\- "No, no, nothing like that." – then he added mischievous –"Turn your head just a little bit and look at her."

Hetty was sat at her desk blowing her cup of tea and staring at Callen's back.

\- "She had his gaze fixed on me, I can feel it."- murmured G at Kensi's ear.

Kensi laughed. She was always amazed by the strange relationship Hetty and Callen had.

\- "So, why is she pissed off?"

\- "She treats me like a child so I behave like one. She wants me to rest when in fact she is the one who needs to do it, but she's too stubborn to recognize it."

\- "I see."

\- "Well, and you? Don't you have anything to share with the rest of the class?"-mocked G.

\- "Me? No. Why?"- she asked somewhat embarrassed.

\- "I don't know. Just guessing. You went to the beach recently with a ring that you're not wearing today in a special finger." – he said taking her hand and signaling the white stripe on his ring finger – "Deeks is throwing another kind of gaze to you and he has a cord around his neck with a round pendant."- at this point Kensi was turning red- "What do you give him, the ring to flush the toilet? Ouch!"

\- "It is the ring of a grenade! and close your mouth if you don't want a broken rib!"

\- "Ha, ha, ha. No, please, I've enough! I was just guessing. Congratulations Kens… or should give you my condolences?"

Kensi raised his fist.

\- "I surrender! I surrender! I'm happy for you, honestly. He's a great guy."- G said hugging his friend.

\- "Please, don't tell anybody. It's not the best moment to announce it, for Sam."

\- "Don't worry. You know he would know sooner or later, right?"

\- "Later is good."


	22. Chapter 22

A.N.: As always thank you for your support. Your comments make me happy :)

Chapter 22

That night neither Hetty nor Callen slept well. The omen of something dark coming was eating Hetty and darker nightmares were haunting G who woke up feverish, startled and anguished. Both of them went to the mission in silence. It wasn't even eight in the morning when the phone rang. Callen saw Hetty's resignation gesture and approached her desk.

\- "Yes Edmond, I'm perfectly aware of the situation. No, definitely, this won't be possible. Well, the Secretary of Defense ought to wait, I'm afraid. As I already explain to him Agent Callen's is in sick leave and I don't know agent Jones' whereabouts…. Yes …We're ruling in code 5. Of course, Edmond. I'll be there."

\- "Hetty?"- inquired Callen worried.

\- "We knew that this would happen Mr. Callen."

\- "I'm going with you."

\- "You are not going anywhere. First of all you need to recover; you're no compromising your health for a bunch of bureaucrats."

\- "But I backed up you; I gave a direct order as the agent leader of the operation. I'm as responsible as you are, Hetty, and I'm not letting you alone with that."

\- "No, no, no. We're not going to give them whatever they want. There's no point in destroying also your career, your team needs you here. You know that they have wanted my head for a while now."

\- "What about Nell?"

\- "I think it's a good time for her to go on holidays. In fact it will be a good idea that you also keep a low profile. They have already asked for a medical certificate and certainly they are going to verify that you aren't able to go to Washington."

\- "Well, I hope your friend the doctor could exaggerate the medical report."-he said G coming back to his desk.

\- "Oh my boy! You don't realize that there's no need to exaggerate even a bit."- she muttered as she saw him going away.

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Kensi was parking the car at the entrance of the mission, borrowing for once Sam's place. She went out of the Audi and Deeks did the same with a slam.

\- "I thought that you wanted to keep our thing in secret!- he exclaimed.

\- "And I did! But Callen guessed it. He's is good at that, you know."

\- "I don't tell even my mum and now he knows what means that Hetty knows, what means that Sam knows."

\- "He won't tell, Deeks, c'mon!"- Kens said following him to the bull pen. But Deeks wasn't in the mood. He went directly to the shooting range to discharge some adrenaline.

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Callen's pone rang.

\- "Hi Sam"

\- "G! are you alone?"

\- "I'm at work, you know that it's difficult to be alone here. Why?"

\- "When are you going to tell me the truth?"

\- "What do you mean Sam?"

\- "I know that something is going on with Hetty. If she is sick or something I would like to know, G, I deserve that."

\- "Hetty is sick of bureaucrats and sick of dealing with me I guess, but otherwise she's fine."

\- "Dealing with you?"

\- "She doesn't have lollipops in the car. I miss my partner."

\- "Ha, ha, ha. Try to behave for once in your life! Better idea, why don't you come here? The kids are excited about seeing uncle Callen and I'll really appreciate having you around; yes, before you said anything, I miss you too."

G bit his lip. He wanted to follow the lead Anna started, he was convinced that the threat wasn't over with Khaled's death and Sam's security was his priority. Besides, he knew that his perforated eardrum will prevent him from flying, but maybe in some days he would be ok, so he decided to gain some time.

\- "I don't know Sam, I'm buried under a mountain of paperwork. Next week maybe. For now what if I send you the guys? Eric and Deeks can do some surfing lessons and I'm sure Kamran will be glad to have the girls around."

\- "Yeah, it would be great, we can really use some company…"- asked Sam disappointed.

\- "Alright then I'll make the reservations."- he made a pause-"Take care, Sam."

\- "Yeah, thanks."

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G saw Deeks at the gallery emptying charger after charger. Even from the other side of the bulletproof window the noise ran through and his sensitive ear was starting to suffer. The moment the agent paused he opened the door.

\- "Deeks! Can I have a moment, please?"- asked Callen.

\- "It depends. If you're going to be as disagreeable as last time, no."

\- "Ok, fair enough, I'm sorry.- He paused and said- "I've just talked to Sam and…"

\- "Oh really? You did?"- Interrupted Deeks ironically- "Because the other day you didn't and we all were feeling stupid when he asked about you!"

\- "What do you want me to say, that I'm sorry, again? Well, I'm sorry. Now, would you listen to me for a second?"- G was starting to exasperate.

\- "So now Sam knows"- Once more Deeks interrupted.

\- "Yeah, he knows, but…"-

\- "You really are the best to screw things up"- and pushing Callen with his shoulder he went out the room.

G was about to follow Deeks but the buzzing in his ear made him to desist. He was more sad than confused. Sad for Sam, all the lost calls, he knew that he failed his best friend and he never forgive himself for that.

When he regained his composure he texted Eric and waited for him sat on the stool in the armory.

\- "What's up Callen?"- said the tech some minutes later- "Deeks wants to strangle you."

\- "I don't know and I don't care"- lied G - "Listen, I've a mission for you."

\- "Whaaat? Really G I'm not sure…"

\- "It's about Nell. I need you to protect her."

\- "What are you talking about? Is she in danger? Why you don't tell her? Do you want me to protect her? With a gun? I really don't know if I could…"

\- "Eric! Listen: she's not in danger, well not the danger you think, anyway."

\- "You're scaring me! I …"

\- "Please Eric"- Callen stopped him raising his hand- "The Secretary of Defense is going to summon her in order to clarify the chain of command at the release of Khaled. Hetty needs to buy some time and from now and for at least one week I need you to keep Nell out of the reach of Washington."

\- "How do you want me…?"

\- "Here, two tickets to Hawaii and the voucher for the hotel. You're travelling under an alias. With the excuse of cheering Sam and the kids up I don't want her near a computer or something that could be tracked. You know the deal."

\- "Are you sending us to Hawaii, like on a holiday? So what happen if someone is really coming for her?"

Callen smiled tiredly. The noises of the shots and the cries of the previous conversation with Deeks had worsened the pain in his ear. He was slightly slight headed.

\- "Don't worry Eric, Kensi and Deeks are going with you."

\- "You're not coming?"

\- "I'll try to catch up with you later. Could you tell the others, please? The sooner you go the better."

\- "Yeah, great! I mean, of course, we're going in a mission!"

Supporting his head between the hands G sighed when Eric went out the room. He wasn't feeling ok and he knew that later with the medication he'd feel even worse. Great.

\- "Callen!"- said Kensi entering the room minutes later.- "It's true what Beale is talking about? Are you sending us to Hawaii?"

\- "Well, you're not, your alias is going"

\- "Undercover? I don't understand…"

\- "Not really. Just for the trip. We need to keep Nell out of the reach of the Secretary of Defense for a while and I'm sure Sam could use your help with Kam."

\- "Wow, but…"

\- "No buts, Kens, the unit is in code 5, no new missions, so there's no point in staying. Consider it as a way of celebrating… you know what. I'll try to fix the paperwork in order you don't lose your days off. By the way I don't know what's wrong with your partner, just convince him to get his ass out of here."

\- "Eric told me you two had an argument. Oh Callen! I hope you won't hold that against him. He's not sleeping well, he's having nightmares about Michelle, and today he's specially jumpy."

Callen felt bad for Deeks, he can't even imagine how he would have been in his place, finding Michelle just to learn that it was too late. A sudden wave of sadness invaded the room. Kensi seemed to revive that fatal moment and Callen discovered that he has been so busy trying to manage things that he didn't took the time to think about Michelle. That time had to wait. Taking all the air that his broken rib allowed G asked in an unusual tiny voice:

\- "Do me a favor, Kens." – she raised her head and look at her friend who supported his head with his hands– "take care of them, please."

\- "You got it"- she nodded somewhat moved. She was about to leave the room when she asked:

\- "Are you ok Callen?"

\- "No. I'm not."- he sighed. She was the first one on his team to ask him how he was feeling- "Thank you Kensi."

\- "Yeah, this shit it's not easy."- she went out quickly hiding a tear.

The screen on the wall turned on:

\- "Mr. Callen. Rule number two."

\- "Damn."


	23. Chapter 23

A.N.: Still there? I loved to write this chapter, I hope you love to read it :)

Chapter 23

The sun was invading the cozy little living room of the hotel suite the Hanna family was sharing. The blue sky was only dotted by a solitary cloud on the horizon that danced in the light morning breeze forming a whimsical figure.

\- "Good morning dad"- said Aiden kissing his father who true to his habits woke up at dusk and was reading sat on the couch.

\- "Did you sleep well, bunny?"- asked Sam putting the book on the table in front of him.

\- "Daddyyy! I'm nearly eighteen!"

\- "Fair enough cadet."- smiled Aiden's father.

\- "Eh… Today I'm not going to the beach."

\- "Why? Aren't you feeling well?"- asked Sam touching his son forehead checking for fever.

\- "I'm fine, it's not that…"

\- "So?"

\- "I don't know; it doesn't feel right."

\- "I see."- said Sam understanding – "It doesn't feel right because you're enjoying it, but you're sad and that's confusing."

\- "I guess. Mom is gone and I'm surfing. Life sucks."

\- "The decision of going or not to the beach is totally yours. But the only thing your mother wanted is to know that her children were happy and loved. It's not wrong to enjoy life, now you have to enjoy it for you and for her. Come here bunny."

\- "Daaaaad!"- complained Aiden without resisting the hug of his father.

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\- "A little prick, Mr. Callen, deep breath"- said Hetty brandishing the syringe.

\- "Fuck"- exclaimed G when he felt the needle into his muscle.

\- "Mind your language! The day you learn to relax it won't hurt that much."

\- "Hettyyyyyy!"

\- "I know, I know, it burns, but this is the last one. The doctor said that you can switch to the pills."

\- "Pleaseeee!"

\- "Almost there… done!"

Callen was panting and sweating. Last days were a veritable torture to him. Pain, dizziness, nausea, needles and, above all, the terrible feeling of failing everyone.

\- "Thank you Hetty"- he said weakly laying still on his stomach and embracing his pillow.-"I think I wouldn't resist another one."

\- "Oh, I'm sure you would. But remember, you need to take the antibiotic every eight hours, nor before, nor later, no excuses. It's a strong one and it can make you feel sick. In order to avoid vomiting you have to eat, something that you seemed to forget lately."

\- "I'm eating."- he complained.

\- "You're picking at your food at most, and you need to eat, not just trying. You're losing weight by leaps and bounds."

\- "I'm not hungry."

\- "Then we'll continue with the injections until you get hungry."

\- "So English breakfast today?"

With the team gone Callen didn't need to go to the office when Hetty did, and Anna promised to show up later. That morning Rose sent him the results of Michelle's autopsy and he knew that Sam, Deeks and Kensi would need to read it. He felt anxious and angry and the only person capable of dealing with him was at 2,500 miles of distance. In an impulse he dialed Sam's number. He didn't get an answer, but he forwarded Rose's report.

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Kamran was the first one to see Deeks on the hotel lobby.

\- "Hello Marty"

\- "Hi Kam! Are you alone?"

\- "No, the boys are coming, I took the stairs and I ran faster than the elevator."

\- "Girl power!"- saluted Kensi giving five to the little one. – "Sam!"- she hugged her friend who just arrived.

\- "Hi Kensi, Deeks."

\- "Hello Sam"- Deeks give him a shoulder hug. – "We have a surprise for you"- he added amused signaling the revolving door where Eric, dressed in a green Hawaiian shirt and flip flops had managed to block the mechanism with his surf board, trapping Nell on the other space.

\- "Oh gosh! This is going to be entertaining at least."

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\- "I don't know in which language I ought to explain you the situation Leon. Agent Callen is in sick leave. He can't fly and it's out of the question his presence at the hearing."

\- "Hetty believe me or not I'm playing every card to keep your unit together. The only chance, if there's still one, of saving your sorry ass is if you, Callen and Jones present a jointly declaration with all the details of the operation, you plead guilty and comply with the verdict without making noise. That probably would save you three from prison."

\- "At this point I give a damn about my career, but I'm asking you to leave my people alone, Leon. Next time I won't be asking."

\- "When are you going to understand that I'm on your side Hetty! Anyway, the first reunion is tomorrow at 12 PM. Don't be late."

Hetty hang the phone up and helped herself a well-deserved whiskey.

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After a light lunch Callen was napping on the library when Hetty took the wooden ladder and placed it on the other side of the bookshelves.

\- "What are you doing Hetty?"

\- "I didn't mean to wake you up, I'm sorry."

\- "Don't be, I wasn't sleeping. Can I help you with that?"- he asked supporting the ladder as Hetty climbed nimbly reaching the Greek section of the high shelves.-"Revisiting your classics?"

\- "Always, Mr. Callen, always. Herodotus Halicarnassus"

\- "The father of History" – he added taking the little book as Hetty descended of the ladder – "In original version, Hetty?"

\- "You used too."

\- "My Greek is more than rusty I'm afraid. Maybe if you read me aloud…?"- he looked at her still on the ladder, with that blue twinkle in his eyes able to seduce the world, but his cheeky smile was a tired one.

Hetty smiled remembering Callen's studies, his insatiable curiosity, his gift for the languages and his passion for learning. How long ago seemed now that afternoons reading aloud in Latin, Greek, French, Russian, Spanish, while he played chess with Alfred! She would do anything in her power to protect him, but this time it will be an arduous task.

\- "Thermopylae Battle."

\- "Greco-Persian Wars 480 BC"

\- "Very good Mr. Callen. 300 Spartans led by Leonidas against the whole Greek army."

\- "They lost the battle."

\- "Indeed. But in this case nobody remember the conqueror."- she paused before announcing -"I'm leaving to Washington now. And before you do something stupid, remember that Nell is also in the boat. You know that I'm not going to jail and I can possibly organize your escape if necessary, but Miss Jones wouldn't be able to live that kind of life. Stay here, stay safe, take care of yourself and your team and we'll face whatever it comes the moment it comes."

\- "Hetty…"

From the height she kissed him lightly on the head before descending the ladder.

\- "For once in your life, humor me Mr. Callen."

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Once Hetty gone, a wave of anguish invaded Callen's chest. It was amazing how he could feel safe and protected by an old tiny woman, but without her he needed to take the reins of the situation and of his life. Hetty's kiss was the prelude of a farewell and he couldn't bear losing her.

He took a shower. The wounds on his back were healing well, he coated the burn with the antiseptic unguent that Hetty prepared, covered it with a big plaster and bandaged his wrist. Then he shaved avoiding the stiches of his chin, and changing the length of the electric razor he cut his hair to the navy standard. He passed his hand over his head and looked himself in the mirror. When some minutes later Anna went to pick him up he was ready to start business.


	24. Chapter 24

A.N.: Thank you for your support, you make me happy with your comments. Here it goes another one :)

Chapter 24

\- "Callen my friend! To what do I owe this honor? and don't say that you only want my daughter because you'll hurt my feelings! Besides I don't know if I want to know what you're doing with my daughter!

\- "Hi Arcady. If you want to know what I'm doing with your daughter, ask your daughter."

\- "You look like shit, Callen, and not only for this radical haircut of yours."

\- "Thank you, man."

\- "No, I mean, I'm sorry about your friend. Express my condolences to the big boy. In the bottom of his heart he knows that I love him. "

\- "I'll do, thanks Arkady. Can I speak to Boris for a second?"

\- "Boris? Two days ago Anna and now you. Definitely I don't know if I want to know."

Installed at the table of Arkady's opulent living room, Callen talked to Boris in Russian for more than an hour. Then he asked for paper and pen and started to write his impressions with Anna's aid. Soon the table was full of papers and pictures. Ideas, motives, a psychological profile of Aran Mafur and a map of the city, in Callen's head everything was starting to take shape. He didn't stop even when he felt the fever rising afraid of losing the common threat, hopping that Hetty didn't appear remembering him the rule number two.

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The round of Monopoly was eternal but the kids and the not so kids seemed to be enjoying it. Eric and Aiden against Deeks and Kam were playing for hours while Kensi and Nell went to the city center to do some shopping. Sam taking advantage of the situation went to the beach to contemplate the sunset, grateful for these hours of solitude.

When she and Kensi arrived, Nell joined the party in a flash.

\- "So who is winning?" – she asked.

\- "Meeeee!" – cried in unison Kamran and Eric making everybody laugh.

\- "Can I join you?"- she said sitting at the table.

\- "Nooo, you are my partner, you come with us!- exclaimed Eric.

\- "Nellosaurus is with us"- said Deeks making Kamran laugh.

\- "Do you play Kensi?"- Asked Aiden handing a chair over Kens.

\- "No, don't worry, thanks Aiden, you keep playing I'm going to stretch my legs outside" – she answered and touching lovingly Deeks shoulders as she stepped by his side she went out the room to the hotel garden.

The navy blue sky was spattered with shiny little stars and from the sea blow an agreeable cool breeze. Kensi inspired deeply enjoying the marine scent. She leaned on the wooden fence that separated the garden from the beach and in the distance she saw Sam's silhouette stood out under the moonlight. She took her sandals off and rolling up her long dress she headed for his friend.

\- "Mind if I head out with you?"- she asked.

\- "Not at all, Kens"

\- "It's beautiful out here"- commented Kensi admiring the gleam of the pale moon.

\- "Yeah"- he answered absentminded.

Both of them remained in companion silence sat on the cold sand for a while, a chill ran on Kensi's back and she hugged herself raising her knees. Sam put his muscled arm around her shoulders.

\- "You're cold. Are you up for a walk?" – he asked not in the mood to come back inside yet.

\- "Sure."

The two friends walked on the seashore avoiding the timid waves, until a bigger one came and splattered Sam's legs wetting all his pants. He laughed.

\- "It's good to hear you laughing"

\- "It's not easy, believe me."

\- "I can only guess your pain, Sam. I don't know even what to say to you, I don't know how you can start to heal, but if I can do anything for you, I'm here."

\- "Thank you Kensi. You're doing more than you think. Being here, taking care of the kids, walking now with me. That means a lot."

\- "It's the least I can do."

\- "Well, not everybody seems to agree with you."- Sam was thinking on G, wondering once more why the hell he wasn't with them. He really missed his best friend, nevertheless the title of "best" was starting to teeter. Sam stopped for a second and looked at Kensi's eyes. –"Have you seen Hetty lately?"

\- "The day before yesterday."

\- "And?"

\- "Well, she seemed tired, kind of old, although she didn't lose her intimidating power. The other day she was piercing Callen with her stare"- she smiled remembering.

\- "Why?"

\- "I really don't know, I think that Callen was trying to make her rest and vice versa. She overdid all these days and now she's paying the consequences."

\- "I want your opinion. Do you think it's something serious?"

\- "I've asked Callen the same thing, I was even wondering about agent orange, but he assured me that there's nothing to worry about."

\- "But…"

\- "Nothing"

\- "Kens…"

\- "It's not Hetty, is Callen…"

\- "What happen with G?"

\- "Nothing, really it's only an impression. He's jumpy, and grumpy. He argued with Deeks the other day without a reason. I think he's not sleeping because he looks tired. You know that he is not good at dealing with emotions and I think that maybe this is too much for him."

\- "He seemed fine at the phone last time we spoke. Even resolute. I hope that now that Hetty is better he can come."

\- "Yeah, he can use some sun, that's for sure."

Another chill made Kens to cross her arms around her chest.

\- "It's getting cold. Let's come back. I hope they have finished the damn Monopoly."

\- "Not if Nell is in!"

Both friends smiled in the dark as they walked quicker now to the warmth of home the group had formed.

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After working together for hours Anna stopped unable to keep on. She yawned and looked at G who was still writing.

\- "You look exhausted"- said Anna touching Callen's nape.

\- "I'm good"- he answered in a voice that proved exactly the contrary.

\- "No, you're not. I'm going to find the keys and I'm driving you home."

When Anna come back to the living room Callen was still seated in the same place sleeping over the table using his arms as a pillow. She approached ready to wake him up, but Arkady, stopped her.

\- "Schhhh. Don't touch him."- putting a finger in his mouth to indicate silence he took Callen's jacket from the back of the other chair and trying not to disturb his sleep he put it carefully over his shoulders.

Anna followed her father outside the room. She was surprised of the affection her old man showed for Callen with that simply gesture, and she discovered a hint of jealousy.

\- "He's not good a sleeping. If you wake him now he wouldn't sleep in all night."

\- "How do you know?"- she asked curious.

\- "It's not the first time he sleeps here. And I mean here or in the kitchen or besides the swimming pool or on the couch… anywhere but on the guest room. Don't ask me why."

From the glass door Anna watched Callen's rhythmic breathing. She has a lot to learn about him and the journey promised to be fascinating.


	25. Chapter 25

A.N.: A big thank you to my followers. It's great to read your comments and knowing that you're enjoying the ride. I can't write faster, sorry!

Chapter 25

Sat alone on the beach Deeks was feeling like crap. Another night haunted by nightmares and another day trying to cheer everyone up, exhausting exercise. In the distance he saw Eric surfing, the man was amazing and the waves perfect. Sun, surf, friends, holidays, love, everything he could dream and he was just unable to enjoy it.

\- "Something is eating you."- a voice said at his side.

\- "Hey Sam. No, no, I'm fine."

\- "Deeks… you're not fine, I'm not fine, none of us is fine. We're just coping with the situation. But sometimes is better to talk about it."

\- "Sam… I can't…"

\- "What? Do you think that I can't take it? that you should protect me? C'mon Deeks!"

\- "Ok, I think that I need to say you something, but you don't have to do anything and I'd understand if you get mad and you won't talk to me anymore."- he said looking at the horizon.

\- "Just say it."

\- "That day, the day Michelle was kidnapped, I talked to the guard and I thought something was off and I didn't stop to think about it. It was just an impression, but I'll never forgive me for not following my gut."

At this point tears were falling from Deek's eyes. He needed to free himself of the burden he was carrying even if it would be the end of his friendship with Sam.

\- "Then when we found Michelle, I was slow, maybe if I've be quicker, maybe if I'd run faster… it was my fault, Sam, and I'm not asking you to forgive me."

\- "I'm nothing to forgive you, pal, believe me. I only can thank you, and my whole life would not be enough to thank you for being there for Michelle, for trying, for fighting, for founding her, and now for being here for my kids and for me."

The two friends hugged, deeply moved.

\- "You need to know something, Deeks. G sent me Rose's report; the toxicological test in the autopsy showed traces of the botulinum toxin. Even if you had been faster or you found her before, she couldn't have been saved."

\- "Oh God! I'm sorry, Sam, I'm so sorry!"

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After two days of investigation and hard work Callen had completely invaded the boat house where he was even passing the nights. Although nightmares never allowed him to sleep more than three hours in a row he was feeling better, stronger little by little and even the vertigo seemed to be in remission. Regularly Hetty called from Washington just to remind him to take his pills or the hated drops or his appointment at the hospital.

A story board full of causes, facts and consequences was hanging on a big board, the pictures that Anna had been taking these days were the center of all his paperwork and the screen showed a map of Los Angeles divided in quartiers.

\- "This is a crazy theory."- said Anna. She had just brought two glass of apple juice and some fruit hoping that G ate something.

\- "And that's precisely why it can works. Listen, we know that the Sudanese are asking around to get a massive shipment of weapons; Aran Mafur wants just to prove his superiors that he's able to provide, using us, with the intention of being promoted in the organization. On the other hand there's a connection between the Molina cartel and the Sudanese, not only at lower level but at a high one. "

\- "That's a very long shot, Callen."

\- "No, not so long" -he said smiling and putting in the top of the papers the picture with the mysterious guys in the car. - "and it was you the one to prove it. I've done my homework and this is Mario Alberto Suarez"- he said signaling the Mexican guy of the picture with the two men in the car –"a big fish of the Molina cartel; his presence at Little Ethiopia isn't due to Ramón Hernández, there's something bigger going on."

\- "Ok, let's say that effectively is something going on. So what?"

\- "So we introduce a variable, an X factor. A new Russian network able to provide drugs, weapons and what the client wishes before the Molina cartel does. If we block the little deals the cartel has, the connections with the Sudanese cellule will weaken and we'll be perceived as the only alternative."

\- "A crazy theory and a crazier plan; that would be like rustling a wasp's nest and the only thing that you're going to provoke for sure is the cartel's rage."

\- "That's the idea. We force them to make a move, if the cartel goes for us we send the agencies and L.A.P.D. will have less to worry about. On the contrary if the Sudanese cellule looks for us then I'm not going to stop until I wipe them out of the map.

\- "Even if we want to start it we don't have nor the people nor the weapons or drugs or whatever to do it; and even with drugs and weapons, are you telling me that you want to be the boss of the new mafia?" - she asked smiling approaching G.

\- "Lately I'm thinking about a career change, and this one I can do it!"

\- "Oh really, agent Callen?" - she said sitting in his lap.

\- "It would be a quick way to fill my piggybank" - sighed Callen- "We can't do it alone, but we know who is able to lend us some goons speaking Russian."

\- "He's going to kill us."

\- "It depends on the benefices, believe me."- he said kissing Anna.

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After hundreds of hall talks, veiled insinuations, open accusations and three unproductive hearings. Hetty knew that her career was over. She only hoped to be able to save Callen and Nell from the debacle and all her energy was focused on that task.

\- "No, Michael, I told you that this is not negotiable."

\- "But Hetty if they testify, I could have something to put on and maybe to gain some time. Don't you realize that we have nothing?"

\- "Neither them, at this point is my word against the word of some obscure agent."

\- "International terrorism, Hetty"- sighed the lawyer.

\- "And the terrorist is dead. So…"

A new murmur ran the hall. Little groups of people were forming and the whispering was getting loud.

\- "I'm going to find out what is going on"- Michael said.

\- "Not need"- affirmed Director Vance approaching.- "Hetty, gentleman"- he saluted.

\- "Good morning Leon. So what is the last gossip?"

\- "A bad one, Henrietta. And I really hope you have an ace in your sleeve. The conversation between you, Callen and Jones was recorded and they got the record."

Hetty expression changed. Suddenly she seemed old and fragile.

\- "Hetty …

\- "I give a damn about my career, my dear, but my head is the only one that will roll. You only have to concentrate in saving Miss Jones and Mr. Callen's career."

\- "Give me something then, the last hearing is in three days!"- exclaimed the poor guy at lost.


	26. Chapter 26

N.A.: Again and always, thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm in Spain for a week without access to my original document which I'm trying to recover via Dropbox. All that just to ask you patience if I'm not able to post everyday. Sorry in advance and thank you!

Chapter 26

Weather was just perfect; sunny with a light breeze that prevented it from being too hot. In other circumstances Callen would have jumped to the swimming pool. That day he was all business even if he was still sore for the antibiotic in his ear. Sat at the table near the pool eating a not very healthy lunch Arkady listened to G's idea.

"What? Do you need what? You're a very madman my friend."- said Arkady at Callen's request.

"C'mon Arkady. At the end you're keeping the money and I'll pay you for your men. You know where to find the weapons and it would be piece of cake to make them to swallow the bait."

"It's risky and I don't know what you're pretending with all this nonsense. Do you realize that you my friend, a federal agent, are asking to me, an honest citizen, a model for the society, to steal weapons from my brother in law and to sell them to a terrorist?"

"I know it sounds bad when said aloud, but this may be the only opportunity I have to follow the lead. Besides think that you're doing a real favor to your brother in law dispatching the weapons."

"And you my beautiful daughter, do you agree with him?"- he asked more to include Anna into the conversation than to in fact listening to her version, knowing that she would be in.

"C'mon dad, it will be fun."

If Callen was surprised at Anna's answer, Arkady nearly chocked with the fries he was eating and he knew I wouldn't be able to deny anything to the couple.

"Fine, whatever, you two are going to cause me a heart attack and you'll have a guilty conscience forever and ever."

That same afternoon the small network was implanted. Five neighborhoods and two of Arcady's men in each. The game begun and the results started to show nearly straight away. Patrolling the streets, listening every conversation, controlling the suspects and intercepting the deals before quickly sneaking into safety. Eight little operations of the Molina's cartel were aborted by the Russians. Arkadi's men shaped in the armed conflicts in Europe and Asia were even grateful for the action, but the enormity of the task was too much for ten men. They needed people able to be everywhere without being seen, loyal and trustful.

"Think about it Anna! There is already an army in place, we only need to recruit them for our cause!"- exclaimed Callen.

"This is even crazier than using the Russians."

"I can't believe I'm the optimistic of the partnership"-he smiled.

"I'm not being pessimistic, just realistic. How are you going to pretend that a bunch of homeless cooperate with you?"

"Do you know how many veterans, former marines are living in the streets? I'm sure that they will be willing to gain some money opening his ears. And even if they can't help us, we can help them. The line that divides us is very thin. I'm going to need get some serious cash."

Callen said that with such simplicity and generosity that Anna was taken aback.

"What?"- asked Callen amused trying to read her expression.

"It's just that I love you."

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It was Deeks and Kensi turn to distract the kids while Eric, Nell and Sam where in one of the rooms fixing the cables and the commands of a 3D simulator.

"Thank you guys; Aiden was asking for this since, I don't know, forever!"- said Sam.

"It's not a big deal Sam. Just two more cables… and ready"- Eric's voice came from under the table.

"Yes, it is. You being here supporting us, spoiling the kids… it means a world to me."

"I was Callen who sent us"- said Eric regretting his words the same moment he said them. He couldn't reveal his secret mission, even if sometimes he forgot he was in a mission.

"Do you know anything about him?" – asked Sam knowing how easy was to read Eric's reactions.

"Not really. He didn't keep in touch. Last time we talked he told me that he had lot of work to do, but that he'd try to join us."

"Obviously he has more important things to do"- said Sam bitterly.

"Don't blame him, Sam, probably Hetty needed him in Los Angeles"- commented Nell, who could imagine in what Callen was working.

"Speaking of devil, do you know something about her?"

"No, but we're here big guy"- said Nell hugging Sam.

Out in the beach not in the mood for more bruises on the surf board Aiden and Kensi were eating a monstrous ice cream decorated with colored umbrellas and sparklers.

"I think that you're the second girl I know that doesn't want to share dessert."- Aiden said.

"Really? And who is the other one?"- asked Kensi amused.

"My sister."

Both laughed.

"She's a great girl, Aiden. Now you have to take care of her, but, believe me in some years she will be your best friend and it would be her who takes care of you."

Meanwhile in the water:

"Wow Kamran you're a natural!"- exclaimed Deeks when the girl stood up on the board at the first try.

"Hi, hi, hi. I haven't forgotten my lessons, that's all."

"You took surf classes?"

"Not really. Uncle Callen taught me when I was little."

"I didn't know he surfs!"- said Deeks surprised.

"Have you ever asked him?"- answered the girl paddling with her hands.

Deeks was taken aback for the simplicity of Kamran's logic and noted mentally some questions for Callen.

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That night Anna drove G to Little Ethiopia. He had passed the previous hours glued to the street cameras in ops studying the people living in the street; then a man in crutches caught his attention. For his way of moving he recognized a soldier, and he seemed sober.

"Please Callen, let me go with you! You're not well yet and this can be dangerous."

"I'm ok, and I need to do this."

"Then I'm going with you."

"If you were ugly and old I'll let you come, but do you really think that a young beautiful blonde could infiltrate in the homeless community without attiring attention?"

She sighed worried sick. This plan was nonsense, inviable from the beginning; the possibilities of success were insignificant compared to the infinite risks Callen could take.

"Do you have your antibiotics?"

"Yes, you already asked."

"Phone, extra battery…?"

Callen interrupted her.

"I've all I need. I promise once I've done I'll send you my position and I let you buy me breakfast."

"Take care, please."

"Always."

It took no long to G to find the man he was looking for. Sat on the steps of a closed shop smoking slowly a cheap cig he seemed to be letting the life pass. He had the darkest skin Callen had never seen that made the white of his soft brown eyes stood out and his left leg was missing from the knee down.

"Do you mind if I sit down for a while, Captain?"

The man looked at G curious.

"This was a free county last time I've checked. And it's Sargent. How did you know?"

"I'm still have one of those." - Said Callen signaling his duffle bag. –"Carlson"-introduced himself extending his hand.

"Everybody calls me Sargent Ben. And I'm under the impression you want something."

"You're absolutely right Sargent Ben, Uncle Sam wants you."

Ignoring good sense, pain and tiredness, G passed the following two days living in the streets, talking to veterans, listening sad stories, buying meals, giving money, sleeping out in the open, showing support and asking for help.

Sam and the guys were coming back soon and he was running out of time. Besides, no news from Hetty only could mean bad news.


	27. Chapter 27

N.A.: I'm back! I want to apologize for the delay and to thank you for your patience. Are you ready for some action? because I am.

Chapter 27

\- "Run!" – cried Callen doing as he told and checking that Anna was following.

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The previous day Anna received Aran Mafur's call. He was interested in doing what he called "some serious business" and he needed proof that his new friends, the Russians, were able to provide him with two hundred Kalashnikovs the next day. They fixed a meeting in a vacant lot near Little Ethiopia, clearly he wanted to play in his field. Even knowing that it could be a trap Callen made Anna to go along and agree with a price that would be paid in cash.

\- "It's a trap" – said Anna.

\- "No, it's not. It's a test."

\- "If the cartel is collaborating with Mafur they will be waiting for us."

\- "I know. We don't need to close the deal, we just need to show our power, to play them with fake weapons."

\- "Power? Really? And which power are you talking about? Because I only see Boris here."

\- "Well, I see you, I see me and let's say that the moment of demonstrating the worth of my little army has arrived."

\- "I don't like it, Callen."

\- "Well, then propose an alternative. If you got anything better I'm all ears".

This settled up Callen passed the afternoon talking with Sargent Ben and Boris indicating positions, codes and strategies. He studied satellite pictures, the structure of every building in the area, roads, access and possibilities. It was like a chess play, letting your opponent to believe that he has the control when, in fact, you were reducing his possibilities and leading him to dig his own grave.

That night G insisted on sleeping in the empty building next to the meeting point. The van with the fake weapons conveniently occulted in plain sight in the vacant lot and a bullet proof car was strategically parked providing a scape plan for Boris and his man.

\- "Still hurts?"- asked Anna seeing G touching his ear.

\- "Not as bad as before."

\- "Callen, please, this is nonsense. You aren't ok, we don't know who we're dealing with. Go home, eat something, sleep in a decent bed and let me take care of this."

\- "I appreciate your concern, but you know that I'm not letting you or the Russians to do this alone. I'll be fine. It's just this nasty infection; it takes longer that I've thought to get rid of it. Try to sleep. I'll do the first guard."- he said.

Anna looked at him and seeing the resolution in his eyes she knew that the battle was lost.

\- "Ok, just wake me up in two hours."

G smiled, knowing that the dull pain in his ear will prevent him from sleeping he didn't have any intention of waking her up.

At four in the morning G's phone vibrated with a sms. It was Sam inviting him to dinner the day of the family return.

\- "I'll bring beers & dessert"- he wrote back.

\- "What are you doing awake?"

\- "I can ask u the same"

\- "Touché"

\- "Too much time with Deeks."

\- "Sleep!"

\- "Yes mum. Night, night."

Sam smiled. He missed his partner and he was willing to catch up with him. He was sure that the kids will love to tell him about the holidays and the preparations for school.

Out of the corner of his eye G saw movement on the street. He woke Anna up and sent a code to Sargent Ben. Ten men were taking positions; they didn't know that they weren't the first ones.

G prepared a stock of shuriken in the pockets of his jeans, closed the zip of the black sweater and put the hood on.

\- "Ninja stars? Really?"- asked Anna preparing her gun.

\- "Rule number four. Long story."

The next minutes were crazy. Aran Mafur showed up with three nervous men, it was clear that the operation was a first one for them, their positions and their behavior spoke volumes about their inexperience, they were looking around as expecting external intervention. An imperturbable Boris displayed a brand-new AK-47 and gave him the keys of the hidden van, giving a masterstroke when he discovered the vehicle. G was under the impression that this one wasn't his first or his second not very legal deal. Boris' man recovered the money and just when they were about to leave, bullets started to fly. The cartel was showing its cards.

Callen gave the signal and followed by Anna went out of their hiding place to cover the Russians retreat who, before gaining the bullet proof car, managed to kill Mafur and two of his men. Sargent Ben and his little squad neutralized without many problems six of the men, but Callen and Anna found themselves trapped between two fires. Crouched down beside a low wall, G said:

\- "At your ten behind the tree! One, two…" – he get up and threw two shuriken in one fluid move – "three!"

Anna got up and shot dead the man.

\- "Run!" – cried Callen doing as he told and checking that Anna was following.

\- "Jacket!"- he took his black sweater off and hold it in the hand as he continued running the full speed his rib allowed.

\- "Park!"- he panted heading up Olympic Boulevard to La Cienaga Park trying not to reduce his speed.

Once he stepped on the grass he laid down and took Anna's hand who landed near him. Callen hugged her and rolling on his back he kissed her cheek.

\- "I… don't know… if we've… lost them"- he managed to say gasping for air and gritting his teeth in pain.

\- "You're insane, you know?"- she said.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw the pursuers coming.

\- "They're there!"- she exclaimed.

Leaning on G and let her hair down on his face. He hugged her and turning his head, he saw the men looking around searching for them. The simple stratagem of taking their black jackets showing his blue T-shirt and her white blouse and laying on the grass like two lovers, was working and, soon, the men leaved the place.

\- "Gone"- muttered Callen rolling into his side and trying to hide his pain without success.

\- "Are you ok? Silly question. I'm going to put my hands in your back to support your rib, you just try to breathe, ready?"

\- "Arrrrrg"- the stabbing pain was terrible and for a moment Callen was afraid of not being able to bear it without passing out. He closed the eyes and tried to breathe rhythmically. Thanks to Anna's support the air started to flow easier and minutes later he was able to sit on the ground. Ghostly pale, trembling and sweating he looked at Anna and laughed.

\- "Completely crazy"- she said laughing also.

With G unable to walk back to the car they paid in cash a cheap motel room in the next block where Callen nearly collapsed on the bed bent by the pain.

\- "You stay here I'm going to look for some ice and water." –Anna said

\- "Be careful."- he said.

\- "Always."

Seconds later G's phone rang. The moment he saw the screen he knew that something bad was about to happen.

\- "Director Vance."

\- "Callen. How're you?" – just for the tone of G's voice the director suspected that Hetty wasn't lying about his health.

\- "Been better. Is Hetty…?

\- "She is fine, but tomorrow at midday is the final hearing. Things aren't looking good Callen. They got the tape with the conversation you three had in the helicopter. Your medical report can make you gain some time, but Jones will be summoned very soon. This is an extra official call, agent Callen."

\- "I appreciate it, Director. Please, don't let Hetty do anything stupid."

\- "Mission impossible. Take care Callen."

Trying still to recover from the sharp pain on his back and burning feeling on his lungs after the run, G dialed Hetty's number. No answer. At the third try he leaved a message, knowing for sure that no matter what he could say it won't be enough to make Hetty change her mind for whatever she wants to do.

When Anna arrived with the water he already had made his decision.

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\- "It's so beautiful here. I don't want to come back."- said Kensi looking at the calm sea. The suitcase was nearly ready on the bed.

\- "It's amazing how quick we get accustomed to good things"- commented Deeks hugging her waist from behind.

They were at the balcony of their hotel room, relaxed, happy and enjoying their mutual company. That break outside Los Angeles with the team was doing more for them than weeks of therapy.

\- "It's the first time that I sleep more than eight hours without nightmares, and it feels wonderful."

\- "I think that you just needed to spend some time with Sam, to talk to him and the kids."- Kensi commented.

\- "Yeah, probably. In any case I'm feeling good."

\- "Me too."

They kissed holding hands long and sweet before Kensi pulled him to the room and kicked the suitcase out the bed.


	28. Chapter 28

A.N.: Thank you for your support, it's great to know that you are still there waiting for more. I hope you'll enjoy this one ;)

Chapter 28

At 12pm sharp the Congressional hearing started in Washington. The Secretary of Defense Edmond Richardson, after a brief introduction of the subject, called the Department of Justice Attorney who made a passionate allegation about the chain of command, the direct orders and the necessity of following the rules. His centerpiece was, as announced the tape with the famous conversation in the helicopter that caused Khaled's liberation.

Hetty was resigned, she bet it all playing her hand with the bad cards she received and she lost. Director Vance couldn't help feeling sorry for her.

The Secretary was about to react to the record when a noise coming from outside made him stop. He called to order and when the noises and the voices increased he sent the janitor to check. The moment the door was unlocked the guard on the other side was launched though the opening his hands tied at his back with a marine knot made with a blue tie. A thin man dressed in a grey suit and pale blue shirt entered handing the guard's gun. With a well-practiced move, he took off the charger and ejected the extra bullet from the chamber, then raised his hands and advanced to the presidential table where he put the gun down.

\- "Agent Callen! What are you doing?" –exclaimed Director Vance scandalized.

But before Callen could answer five guards knocked him down, handcuffed his hands on his back and punched him several times with fists and nightsticks.

\- "That's all you got?" – asked G gritting his teeth.

Hetty went to his defense and before anyone in the room could react she pinch a guard in the butt with the needle of her brooch, took the nightstick that the man released at the surprise, and from behind, between the guard's legs, she hit his crown jewels with all her forces. With a cry the man fell down, and once in the floor was easy for her to steal his weapon and shot at the ceiling pointing then at the guards that were restraining Callen.

For a moment the chaos took over the place. More guards arrived, but Hetty didn't move.

\- "Edmond, could you please tell your gorillas to walk out of the room? Since agent Callen is here against medical advice, the least you can do is listening to what he has to say."

\- "Henrietta, put the gun down."

\- "Edmond, I'm not repeating myself and I'm the one with the gun, remember?"

\- "Guards! Out! Now!"

The guards let Callen on the floor and went out of the room dragging their partner who was still holding his balls. Once they went out Hetty mimicking the easy move that Callen made minutes ago discharged the weapon and let it near the other one. A sigh of relief followed by the murmurs of the presents run the room, but the voices ceased as people saw G stood up staggering slightly. He was bleeding from an open cut on his right eyebrow and a bruise was already forming on his cheek.

The sudden silence was broken by the clonk of the handcuffs against the floor. Callen raised his hands and said:

\- "Jeez what a welcome! Do you receive the same way all the people you summon?"

Some laughs and more nervous comments spread between the presents. Hetty took advantage of the distraction, made Callen sit on her chair and tried to stop the bleeding with her handkerchief.

\- "A bit of order, please!" –called the Secretary – "Fifteen minutes of recess. Bring a paramedic here for God's sake!"

\- "What the hell you think you're doing Mr. Callen?"- asked Hetty worried at G's parlor.

\- "When a door is closed use a window. You told me that once, Hetty, and that's precisely what I'm doing."

\- "Next time make sure you open the window first."- she smiled putting pressure on the wound. – "Your ear?"

\- "Buzzing"

\- "Your rib?"

\- "Killing me"

\- "And your eyebrow, open, I see. What am I going to do with you?"

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Callen's odyssey to arrive to Washington started the previous day. Still in the motel, barely recovered from the pain caused by the crazy run on his escape, he started to look for a way to go to the capital. Discarding for obvious reasons a road trip the perspective of a commercial flight didn't appeal to G.

\- "Listen to me, Callen, you can't do that, I'm serious. You know that you won't be able to regulate the pressure in your ear when flying, you'll risk your hearing for God's sake!"- said Anna.

\- "If I stay I risk more than my hearing. Hetty and Nell need me and I assure you that some atmospheric pressure won't change my mind."- he was typing frenetically at the computer, gathering information about the operation which lead to Khaled liberation and about the one he had just started.

\- "You're just a damn crazy stubborn!"- cried Anna in despair.

\- "If you're not going to help me leave me alone! I don't need you to tell me again that I'm crazy!" – he regretted his words at once. She was crying- "Sorry, Anna, please forgive me. C'mon here" - He said caressing her hair - "I need to do this. It's my people and this is more important than a broken tympanum. I'll be fine, you don't need to worry about me."

\- "But I do. And I know that is your people, you only need to find another way. What about Skype?"

G smiled tiredly.

\- "It's the Congress Anna."

Finally, after asking for some favors at Camp Pendleton, he found a military flight with a free place going from San Diego the next day early in the morning to the Marine Safety Center Coast Guard Base in Washington, DC. In a rush the couple went to the mission to pick up a suit and Callen's credentials, and Anna took the car to drive him to the base.

\- "Here, eat this"- said Callen offering her a protein bar- "You'll need some energy if you don't let me drive."

\- "You can't drive yet"- she said munching the bar -"hummmm this is good!"

\- "Ha, ha, ha, Sam and you are the only ones who like that shit."- he said forcing himself to eat one. Then he realized that it was nearly impossible to come back to have dinner with Sam and the kids on their first day after the holidays. Cursing in every language he knew he sent a text to Sam apologizing.

Nearly immediately after the taking off, G started to suffer the effects of the pressure. Minutes later he was pale and sweating completely dizzy because of the vertigo before of the mocking faces of the five marines sharing the flight. The four hours flight lasted like four years.


	29. Chapter 29

A.N.: Thank you for reading and for comment guys! you make me happy. Ready for more?

Chapter 29

G was dizzy. The vertigo had started the moment he received the hard blow on the side of his face. It wasn't too strong and he was trying to control it without moving his head rested on the back of the chair previously occupied by Hetty. The room was full of people talking in small groups that little by little started to dissolve. One of the Delegates went to speak to Hetty and Michael.

\- "Hetty, I don't know what you're pretending with this charade. Your agent and you playing cowboys, maybe that was normal for you in the far west, but here... I'm pretty sure that both of you are going to be the main subject in the next month conversations."

\- "Don't make me laugh, Sebastian, this is Washington I assure you that the main subject next week will be the terrible taste that Congressman Taylor has at choosing his ties."

\- "Anyway, this is serious. We're talking about jail and the only disagreement is about life sentence or thirty years."- said the Delegate.

\- "Wow! These are very strong words, Delegate! are you telling us that you have a verdict even without listening to the declarations of Agent Callen and Jones? - exclaimed Michael shocked.

The Delegate looked at the young lawyer the same way he would look an annoying mosquito.

\- "Michael -said Hetty- the Delegate is here just showing his good will, and I appreciate it to the extent of its value."- she continued, putting her hand in her lawyer arm, but staring at the Delegate, with mocking eyes.

\- "I just hope that your agent here – the Delegate said signaling Callen with a gesture of his head- don't do anything crazy. Edmond in his head has already locked you and throw the key to the river."

\- "Until my status change, my agents are my deal. I hope you, Edmond and the rest of you, bunch of bureaucrats, have that clear in your heads." - said Hetty looking at Callen.

He was sat with his head on the back of the chair with his eyes closed, enduring without moving the ministrations of the paramedic who was cleaning the cut on his eyebrow. Hetty could see that G didn't feel good, but just when she tried to go to his side a guard went to look for her.

\- "Sorry Madam, you need to come with me. Secretary of Defense's orders"- he said a little bit worried about her reaction.

\- "So, Edmond is worried about some mind tricks and he is isolating me"- said Hetty loud enough for Callen to hear and looking at him waiting for a signal.

Apparently, G didn't react, but while the paramedic was putting some butterfly stitches on his eyebrow, without moving and without opening his eyes, he tapped in Morse code two words: "Molina cartel".

Amused Hetty decided to play along and followed the guard without incidents. She didn't know what could be Callen's intention, but the deck has changed of hands and she had another card to play with.

Some minutes later a little committee formed by Director Vance, Hetty's lawyer the Department of Defense Attorney, five members of Congress and two Delegates reunited in the room where the hearing was taking place. Once the paramedic went out, Hetty's lawyer went to Callen's side:

\- "The Secretary is here, you have to stand up."

Callen opened his eyes and little by little sat up with hands crossed on the table, but he didn't stand.

\- "Agent Callen! Are you aware of the problem you're in?"

\- "The only thing that I'm aware of is that not only one, but five of your men tried to prevent me from doing my constitutional duty of declaring in my behalf and in behalf of my team."

\- "Are you suggesting…?"

\- "With all my respect, sir, you wanted me here, I'm here, even against medical advice. If you have any question related to the case I'm willing to cooperate. Sir."

Michael cursed internally Hetty and all her agents. Usually he was good at his job, but first Hetty and now Callen were ruining his reputation.

\- "Secretary, could I ask for five minutes of recess to talk to agent Callen, sir? I need to…"

\- "It won't be necessary, sir. As I told before I'm willing to cooperate." – interrupted G.

\- "In that case we'll proceed with the summary of the facts that give rise to this hearing in the first place. Delegate, proceed, please."

The following thirty minutes the Delegate talked about the Sidorov case, Randall Sharov, Tom Olsen, Tahir Khaled and Michelle Hanna. For everyone in that room just a list of names, descriptions and statistics, but for G it was his life. Each detail recalled a vivid flash back in his head. The moment he picked Sam up from the prison, the easy banter, the kidnap, Michelle on the screen, the calculation of the oxygen remaining, last time he saw Michelle alive, Sam's anguish, the search, the impotence, Kensi's message letting him know Michelle's death, the injustice, the pain, the guilt, oh God, Sam…

\- "Agent Callen. Agent Callen! Would you answer the question?"

G raised his eyes startled. Cold sweat running his back.

\- "Secretary, sir, it's obvious that Agent Callen isn't in condition to continue." - said Michael, worried.

\- "Could you repeat the question, sir?"- asked Callen in low voice.

\- "Do you admit having given the order to release Khaled?"

\- "Yes, I admit it."

\- "Agent Callen…" – started to say the lawyer.

\- "Do you admit that Henrietta Lange gave the order in the first place?"

\- "Agent Callen, please…"- begged again the lawyer.

\- "I admit that that day Hetty gave the order, but not in the first place."

\- "What do you mean exactly agent Callen?"

\- "I mean that that day we were just following the chain of command, sir."

\- "Are you implying that another person gave you the order to release an international terrorist?"

\- "Not explicitly that day, but implicitly, sir."

A murmur ran between the presents. Director Vance was revolving in his chair.

\- "And who exactly gave that order, agent Callen?"

\- "You did."- Callen stood up and added with a studied pause- "Sir."

The murmur became an explosion of comments and protests. The lawyer didn't know where to hide as Callen, pale, all beaten, the untucked shirt dotted with blood, defied the Secretary of Defense with his blue stare.

\- "Order, order!"- called the delegate.

\- "Agent Callen, I'm going to ask you to consider carefully your next words and I'm going to ask you to answer again the question."

\- "My answer is the same, sir. You gave the order."

\- "And when exactly I supposedly gave you the order?"- asked infuriated the Secretary.

\- "On November 27th 2015 at 17h29 min to be exact."- he said Callen taking a flash drive from the pocket of his pants. - "You can find here the record of the conversation. You can keep the copy, I have more."

\- "You are clearly mistaken, agent Callen. How could I give and order two years before the fact? Don't play with us, agent!"

\- "I'm just going to say two words: Molina cartel."

The Secretary of Defense went pale and Director Vance covered his mouth with his hand to hide a smile. The main promise of the government even before the elections was to finish off the Molina cartel that was operating in the West Coast for too long. The Secretary of Defense, newly promoted, were more than vehement when asked Hetty and Callen to use everything in their power to eliminate the cartel. The recorded conversation was literally a blank check. In other circumstances G would be enjoying every minute, now he was barely able to stand.

\- "Agent Callen, are you telling to this tribunal that the Molina cartel was behind Khaled?"

\- "You have the record, sir. How many identic Corolla went out of the parking during Khaled release? Do you really thought that a Sudanese, first time in the USA, in prison for nearly a year could stage such escape without connections? The release of Tahir Khaled was part of a bigger plan to finish off the Molina cartel, according with your order, sir."

The murmurs were now open conversations, the surprising declarations changed everything, but at this point G dizziness was winning the battle. He felt something hot leaking from his ear and raised a hand to touch it. It was blood. He passed out even before the Secretary could put order.


	30. Chapter 30

A.N.: Thank you very much for your nice comments. Last chapter was intense, I hope you'll like this one as well.

Chapter 30

\- "Easy, Callen, easy!"- the Director Vance was trying to calm a ghostly pale G who came to disoriented and startled.

He was in an observation box of the Military Hospital's ER. The shirt open, IV's in one arm, cuff to measure his blood pressure in the other, ice pack on his side and the chest full of electrodes. Taking off the oxygen mask from his face G asked:

\- "Hetty..."

\- "Don't worry about Hetty; the Secretary of Defense wants to make her talk and he thinks that isolating her is going to achieve something. She's driving him crazy"

G smiled. A nurse came and tried to check on him, but Callen didn't cooperate.

\- "Callen, please!"

\- "I need to go out of here"- said G weakly.

\- "Sir, you need to keep the mask on; don't talk and try to take deep breaths while the doctor comes. And please lay down, your blood pressure is still very low."

\- "Callen, c'mon, stay calm!" - asked Vance putting his hand on Callen's shoulder.

\- "I need to..."

\- "The only thing you need now is to take it easy. I'm sorry I phoned you, I thought your condition was one of Hetty's tricks to gain some time."

\- "You did the right thing"

\- "I only hope you know what you're doing, Callen."

\- "Just..."

\- "Please sir, you need to go out" - the nurse said to Leon Vance -"and you"- she added addressing to Callen - "to stop talking."

\- "See you tomorrow Callen, take care."

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Edmond Richardson was annoyed. Once the shock due to Callen's declarations passed, he felt betrayed and anxious for the possible consequences the affair could have in his political career. He decided to keep Hetty for as long as he could under custody, until Michael started to threaten him with a scandal if he didn't release her immediately. Reluctantly he entered the room. It was three in the morning. Hetty was calm sat on a chair, apparently sleeping or worse, meditating.

\- "Henrietta."- he said in low voice. Hetty raised the head and slowly opened her eyes fixing her stare on the Secretary who wasn't able to hold her gaze.

\- "Edmond. Care to explain my detention?"- she asked demonstrating her great composure addressing the situation.

\- "Your agent."- he didn't like the slight wavering in his voice.

\- "What about him? I hope you are treating him better than me."- her stare was now even more powerful taking advantage of his fear.

\- "I don't like his methods, but if you're able to confirm his story, maybe we should reconsider the reason for the hearing in the first place."

\- "Ha, ha, ha, Edmond. You sound pathetic and it's too late for a bed time story."- time to put the cards on the table thought Hetty.

\- "Please Hetty, the Committee only wants to solve this situation as soon as possible and in the best interest."- begged this time unable to control his impatience.

\- "I'm going to say just two words" - Hetty paused.

\- "Well?"

The silence was so thick that could be cut with a knife.

\- "Molina cartel."

Studying the sudden parlor of her opponent Hetty knew she had won the game with a bluff.

\- "Why didn't you say it a week ago, Henrietta?"

\- "Edmond, Edmond, so much to learn! one week ago I still thought we were friends."

\- "What do you plan to do now? Because we can always negotiate..."

\- "Of course, my dear, but not now, and evidently with my conditions and your full back up for every one of my agents."

\- "I can..."

\- "Edmond, I believe I make myself clear: not now. Where is Mr. Callen?"

\- "He's at the hospital. He felt dizzy and just for precaution..."

\- "Don't you dare to lie to me Edmond!"- exclaimed Hetty ballistic. - "What happen to him and why on Earth I wasn't informed?!"

\- "He fainted, I don't know why, but he is in a room at the Military Hospital. His condition is not serious."

\- "I'm his next of kin and he was unconscious. I'm the one who decides about his condition and if something happen to him next time you'll see me I would be holding my gun! Understood?"

\- "It's a threat, Henrietta?"

\- "No, Edmond, no. It's a fact."

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\- "Why is Uncle Callen not coming?"- asked Aiden.

\- "I don't know, Aiden, he didn't say. Look, what about a pizza before going home?"- offered Sam. Since they said goodbye to Kensi, Deeks, Nell and Eric at the airport the spirits were suddenly low.

The house seemed empty and cold when Sam and the kids opened the door. Kam was even tempted to call her mum as she always did when coming back from the school. The silence was only broken by the noise of the suitcases and suddenly the lightness of their moods disappeared. Aiden excused himself and disappear way his room.

Kam looked at his father who seemed hypnotized by a picture of her two year old self with her mum. Distracted he wiped a tear from the corner of his eye and that was more that the girl could stand.

\- "Good night dad, thank you for the dinner."

\- "Good night sweetie. Do you want me to cover you later?"

\- "I'm a big girl, dad."

\- "Yes, you are. Sleep well."

She ran upstairs feeling that her world was falling apart. Why? Why her? Why her mum? She needed her mum! And his daddy wasn't the strongest man in the universe as before! She entered her room and started to throw the clothes she cumulated in the chair that usually her mum put in the closet for her. Angry she took the damn black dress from the floor and then, something heavy felt from the pocket. It was the handkerchief that Callen gave her the day or the burial, but there was something inside. A cellphone. An old fashion one with keys and a little screen hi, hi, hi, the kind of thing that should be in a museum. On the phone there was a post-it note with a pin code and a phone number. She recognized Callen's neat calligraphy. The rage she was feeling gave way to the curiosity. She put her pajamas on, brushed her teeth and went to her bed where she turned the phone on.

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Unable to sleep hooked to an IV, alone in the impersonal room of the hospital, G was thinking about Sam and the kids back at home, when his burner phone biped. Reading the text he smiled.

\- "Hi U.C."

\- "Hi u. U found the phone."

\- "Today. Sorry."

\- "No need to apologize. How r u?"

\- "Fine. I guess. Why didn't u come 2 Hawaii?"

\- "I hurt my ear. Couldn't fly."

\- "Are u ok?"

\- "Better. Don't worry."

\- "U.C. I'm the saddest person in the world."

\- "We're the saddest persons in the world"

\- "Dad says l should enjoy life"

\- "And u should, when ready"


	31. Chapter 31

A.N: I can't thank you enough for your nice comments and encouragements. Thank you for reading:)

Chapter 31

When Hetty arrived to the hospital in the morning, she found Callen half-dressed with his pants from the previous day and cursing at the bloody shirt in his hands. The doctor had just checked on him and with a little pressure he had signed his release.

\- "I guess you've threatened the doctor to be free so soon."- saluted Hetty noticing the new bruises on G's torso and how much weight he had lost recently. The needle marks on his arms explained the bags under his eyes.

\- "Not this time."- After a night fighting demons Callen wasn't very rested, however the relief of seeing Hetty was reflected on the smile on his face. -"Are you ok Hetty?"

\- "It's me who should ask you that. But let's go out of here. Washington makes me hungry; how about waffles? Here, you may need this"- she said handing over a suit bag.

\- "Thank you Hetty"- Not wanting to prolong his stay one minute more than necessary he picked the bag and went to the toilet to get dress.

Hetty took advantage of the moment to read Callen's chart: his blood pressure was still low but under the limits of a normal range. She was pleased to see that the infection in his ear was in remission and in general his levels were higher than last time she checked his analytic run, however he was far to be one hundred per cent fit yet.

\- "Ready for the waffles"- announced Callen dressed in an elegant blue suit.

\- "And for some answers, I hope!"- smiled Hetty.

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Once more Sam couldn't find the courage to sleep in his own bed and he woke up grumpy and tired. His morning ride that usually made him feel great only contribute to increase his sadness. The loss of Michelle was so sudden that the shock was atrocious. And now he had just two days, two more days with his kids before they had to go to the Academy. All was happening so quickly! He felt alone. The time in Hawaii was great to reinforce family ties, because he considered his team mates as a family. They spoiled the kids, they cheered them up, they provided him with some freedom, time to be alone, to assimilate the horror and the fact that his partner in life had gone forever. Every one of his friends had tried to talk to him, Kensi, Deeks and even Nell and Eric, but he could feel their fear, their caution, the sad looks, the compassion and he didn't know how to deal with it. He needed the truth; he missed the brutal honesty of his best friend, his pessimism optimistic, his caustic way of facing life. He needed Callen to tell him how to survive, because he needed answers from someone who had lost everything in life and was able to carry on. He needed his support, his companion silence, a beer, a game together and he didn't understand nor his absence nor his lies, because he promised to be there for him and the kids and he didn't appear.

In an impulse he looked for Callen's number in his phone, the screen displayed a "G" and when he was about to dial Kamran jumped on the couch at his side:

\- "Morning dad!"- she kissed him and seeing Sam's cellular she added nonchalantly- "Don't worry about Uncle Callen, he'll be ok. Can I have some cereals? When are we going to buy the things for the school? Why Aiden sleep so much? In the Academy he needs to wake up early. How many girls do you think I'll find in my class? Dad, dad! are you coming with me the first day? You can't let me alone in the plane with my brother. C'mon daddy! I'm hungry!"

Sam saw his girl running to the kitchen and suddenly a lump formed in his throat. In two days his little bundle of energy will leave him alone, more alone than ever.

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Sat in the far corner of Lincoln Waffles with each cups of tea with milk and waiting for the orders to arrive, Hetty admonished Callen:

\- "Are you telling me that you slept three days in the streets, that you recruit an army of homeless veterans and that you participated in a shooting where people were killed?"- She asked alarmed- "What about rules two and four?"

G looked like a boy catch with the hand in the cookie jar.

\- "Hetty I took my meds, I didn't use a gun and I rested!"

\- "In the streets!"

\- "Only for two days, the other one was an old building!"- he protested.

\- "And the plane..."

\- "Even the doctor said that the pressure of the flight had no consequences, it was just…"

\- "Painful"- completed Hetty looking at G in the eyes and guessing how bad he must have felt.

\- "…The quickest way to get here in time for the hearing."

\- "You don't understand that you are more important than any hearing?"

\- "But I'm fine, really!"

\- "You collapsed yesterday and you passed the night at the hospital, you're better, not fine."

The waitress arrived with the breakfast: fruit for Hetty, eggs and bacon for Callen and waffles for both of them. Once she served the table, they continued with the conversation:

\- "Are we going to discuss how bad it could have been or can we concentrate in making a plan to get ride off your friend the Secretary? - exclaimed G more than tired of being the center of attention. -"Because we have less than three hours to convince them than we are going to finish the Molina Cartel."

\- "Fair enough."- Hetty agree letting aside her worriedness and attacking her bowl of fruits. - "Let's focus. How to annihilate the Molina Cartel: we both know that the cartel is the best implanted criminal organization in the West Coast, not only the N.C.I.S., but all the agencies are behind them and it has been nearly impossible to make important detentions over the last years."

\- "This is because of the lack of a real aim of collaboration. The D.E.A. and the C.I.A. are more worried about having all the credit than actually doing the job."

\- "And that's not going to change."

\- "It depends on your friend the Secretary. If he give us the control, the possibility of coordinate the forces maybe we can hurt the organization."

\- "It's a possibility, in fact. But you don't care about the Molina Cartel…" – guessed Hetty.

G smiled, she knew him too damn well. He played with the fork and the bacon. Some minutes ago it seemed a good idea, but after the waffle he wasn't sure of having the place for it.

\- "No, I don't. This is about Sam. I'm convinced that Khaled had contacts with the cartel. If the cartel is helping the rebels in Sudan they can operate in our country any moment and Sam is a target."

\- "You don't know that."

\- "I don't have enough proofs, you're right, just some hints and a picture." – He begged: "Hetty, please I need your help to keep Sam and the kids safe."

\- "You know this is my priority too. Let me deal with Sam, I don't want him to worry about anything."

\- "I can't lie to him" – said G not convinced.

\- "And you won't. The moment the connection with the Sudanese is confirmed I'll let him know and he and his family will be protected. For now I rather spare him the anguish."- she explained –"now stop playing with your food and eat something if you don't want to come back to the hospital!"


	32. Chapter 32

A.N: As things are complicated for them I thought that Hetty and Callen deserved a breakfast with waffles in the last chapter ;) Thank you for reading!

Chapter 32

Nell was worried sick. Even if the days in Hawaii have been a blessing she couldn't help to feel that she was saying her goodbyes to the team. She knew that losing her job won't be the end of their friendship, but she loved so much what she did in the unit that she couldn't imagine her life out of the N.C.I.S. Eric had been so close to her that she hadn't had one moment to look for the consequences of her acts supporting Hetty and Callen.

In an impulse she bought tuna tacos and drove to Kensi and Deeks house, she needed to talk about it because in the beach with Sam and Eric it had been impossible.

\- "Freckly Nelly! C'mon in!"- saluted Deeks.

\- "Hi Shaggy! I should have phoned, but I decided to come on the fly."

\- "You're not interrupting anything, nevertheless if you want to talk to Kens she is with her mum today."

\- "In fact I need a lawyer, so…"

\- "You need a lawyer!" – repeated Deeks somewhat amused.

\- "What are your fees?"

\- "Whatever you have in that bag."

They sat at the table and Deeks brought two beers and two plates.

\- "Delicious! I love tuna tacos! You just saved me from a lunch of salad left over."- he said when they started to eat, and looking at Nell's face he added -"Oh, oh, this is serious"

\- "How do you know?"

\- "This little wrinkle of yours"- he touched her front with a greasy finger- "Oups, sorry"

Nell laughed and cleaned herself with a paper napkin.

\- "Yes it's serious." – she affirmed and then she told him every single detail of the operation that her privileged mind remembered.

\- "Wow, Nell! Yeah, this is more than serious. That implies that not only you, but Hetty and Callen, and, by extension, the whole unit can be compromised. What they are saying? I mean Hetty must know what is going on the high command."

\- "I don't have any news. Nor Callen nor Hetty are answering their phones, but I need to know, Deeks, please!"

\- "I'm not familiar with the internal procedure, Nell, but the article 107 is about false official statements"

\- "And? The worst case scenario?"- she looked at him in such way that he knew he couldn't lie.

\- "Five years of confinement and forfeiture of all pay and allowances."

\- "I see"- she said suddenly pale.

\- "But you're not going to prison."

\- "And how do you know that?"- she asked with tears in her eyes

\- "Because you have the best lawyer in town and you can pay me in fish tacos" – he said making her to smile. – "C'mon here"- he hugged her tight.

\- "Thank you Deeks. I don't know if you're the best lawyer in town, but you're the best friend."

Once Nell leaved the house Deeks couldn't help thinking about what Nell told him. He decided not to tell Kensi, he didn't want to worry her, and in case she discovered he can always allege professional secret. He took his phone and dialed Callen's number. No answer. "Where the hell are you?"- he thought.

Some minutes later the sound of a key in the door took him off his reverie. It was Kensi.

\- "Hey honey!" – she said kissing him.

\- "Hey you! I thought that you were going to spend the day with your mum!"

\- "And that was the idea until Aiden phoned me."

\- "Something is wrong?"- he asked suddenly alarmed.

\- "No, no it's just… they are going to buy some stuff for the school, and he asked me if we can go to have an early diner with them. Callen didn't show up yesterday and Sam is a little bit down."

\- "He promised."

\- "Apparently he texted Sam last minute"-Kensi sighed –"I'm going to take a shower, have you seen my shampoo? Last time I had to use yours!" – she cried from the stairs.

\- "Second drawer in the left. And don't touch mine!"

Once he heard Kensi had opened the faucet he phoned Callen again. This time he let a message in the answering machine.

\- "Listen, I don't know what is wrong with you, but since you don't have the guts to be here supporting your friends at least you can have the decency of answering the phone! Sam and Nell are bad because of you. Frankly, you don't deserve their friendship."

Enough was enough!

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The meeting with the Secretary and a selected group of people were more than intense. Sat around an oval table Edmond Richardson started to regret the concessions given and tried to retract his word. Callen was losing his patience, although he was a good player when needed, not for nothing he had started his career as an agent at the C.I.A.

\- "Sir, you listened to the record. I'm sure you recognized your voice. The message was explicit and very clear. We were just following your orders."- said Callen knowing positively that nobody could have listened to the audio file because he only showed the flash drive without in fact giving it at the hearing.

His expression was so decided and his stare so firm that no one in the room could doubt of his word.

\- "Gentlemen, we're losing time. The longer we stay here the longer are you preventing us from doing our job."- intervened Hetty.

\- "This is not that simple Henrietta. We need to clarify more than one point: after years doing nothing against the Molina cartel your unit is finally moving its bottom. Why now and not before? How do you justify that agent Callen?"- asked the Secretary.

\- "Over the last three years we intervened directly in seven operations against the cartel, even in Mexico. We found and closed a tunnel that served to contraband drugs and even people; we made sure Enrique Peña, from the Peña cartel, which was the most active collaborator of the Molina cartel was judged and imprisoned, we even stopped a terrorist attack! You must have the reports of each one of our cases. Now we have a new hint that can lead us to finish the cartel. We never stopped working against them, sir."

\- "Very convincing speech, agent Callen, except for a little detail. If you were so determined to eliminate the cartel why is it still operative? Is it because of a lack of interest or ability?"

Before an angry Callen could answer, Hetty did it:

\- "It's rather for a lack of money, my dear, or should remind you the last budget you approved?"

\- "That's all you need, agent Callen? Money?"- a delegate asked.

\- "My team, resources, collaboration, coordination, autonomy, that you turn a blind eye about procedures and, yes, money."- G affirmed.

A murmur ran over the table, two delegates were doubting, but the others seemed convinced. Hetty exchanged a quick look with Callen; after all they could come off well of the situation. The Secretary in the bottom of his heart knew that for him was a win-win situation. If Callen succeed he would take the credit and on the contrary if he failed he would have his head on a silver platter.

\- "All right then, tomorrow first thing in the morning I want your financial rapport in my table. A list of what do you need and how much this is going to cost me. Well, to this administration. A commission will study every detail and, if it's viable, you and your unit, Henrietta, will have the opportunity of doing something useful for this country. Of course the charges against both of you and agent… what's her name?... Jones, are summited to your success. And this time I'm not going to wait three years. You have three months."

\- "With all due my respect sir, that delay …" – started to say Callen who, more than tired, thanked God not having his gun.

\- "Are you telling me that you can't do it, agent Callen?"- the Secretary cut him.

\- "No, sir, but I don't think that a threat will help."

With a stare of triumph addressed to Hetty Edmond Richardson said:

\- "Oh, but it is not a threat, agent Callen, it is a fact."


	33. Chapter 33

A.N: It's great to know that you're there sharing this story with me :) thank you for all your support, you're great!

Chapter 33

On the taxi in their way to Hetty's hotel she was still outraged, but Callen was just happy to be out of that room full of bureaucrats and to have the possibility of following his plan with the resources and back up of the government. The only thing he didn't like was the perspective of passing the night settling up a financial plan. In the hotel lobby, while Hetty negotiated two adjoining rooms, he took the phone out of his pocket and taking off the airplane mode he saw all the missing calls: Nell, Deeks, Anna, Aiden, Arkadi, and Deeks and Arkadi again. He listened to the voice message from Deeks and went pale.

\- "Mr. Callen, everything all right?"- asked Hetty sensing troubles in paradise.

\- "Yeah, yeah, Hetty… could you please phone Nell and tell her not to worry? I need to make another call…"

At the third tone the voicemail activated: "Sam, please, I know you're there, answer the phone... Ok, listen: I'm in Washington stocked with a financial report. I can't make it for the first day of class, please tell Aiden and Kam that I'm sorry. I'll compensate you next week… you take care. Bye."

In L.A. Sam listened to G's message. He was angry. Since then G give importance to a financial report and what is he doing in Washington? he had to recognize that as an excuse it was original. At the bip he pressed number three to erase the message. He didn't bother to answer.

Alone in the room of the hotel sat in front of a laptop with an untouched sandwich that Hetty brought some minutes ago, G tried to put aside his sadness and tiredness and focus in the task of writing the damn report. The night promised to be a long one.

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\- "Morning Kens! I hope you weren't sleeping"-saluted Nell.

\- "Hi Nell. No, you just interrupted a discussion about dogs and potty training."

\- "Monty again?"

\- "I don't know if Monty or Deeks but… hey!" – Deeks took the phone from Kensi's hand.

\- "Hello Nell! Don't listen to her. You know, these days of the month…ouch… arggg… ok, ok, ouch I'm sorryyyyy! I take it back, ahhh, Kens! Please!"

\- "Kensi, don't kill him yet"-cried Nell- "Hetty called. We have a case."

\- "Saved by the bell, Deeks"- said Kensi -"Sorry Nell, he is always in "these days"."

Nell chuckled on the other side as Deeks recuperated the phone.

\- "Nell, please, tell me that you have good news."

\- "I supposed so. Hetty wants all the team ready to act. Apparently an old case is reopened and she needs us to be ready."

\- "That means…"

\- "I don't know what that means Deeks, for now the only thing I know is that I see you in the office in an hour to clean the weapons."

\- "Ok, see you then." – He hang up the phone- "Ready for some action Kensilina?"

\- "Oh yeah, more than ready"- she said, even if she knows in the bottom of her heart that she wasn't.

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If the night was long, the morning meeting was eternal. After a light breakfast and a short debate with Callen, Hetty went to the Congress to negotiate the future of the N.C.I.S. unit in Los Angeles. On the other side G reunited with the commission of delegates to discuss the operation against the cartel. For more than three hours he broke the list of his needs down discussing every element to the centime. He needed weapons, tons of weapons ready to be sold. Drugs, the cartel preferred cocaine, but he could manage if he had the access to some synthetic new ones. He knew that he wasn't asking for impossible, but all the illegal stuff took time and paperwork, and he needed to simplify at maximum if they put a delay of three months to have results. The main problem was the human capital. Callen needed people, hundreds of people in the streets, qualified and speaking Russian and Spanish if possible.

\- "Listen Callen, if this is an excuse for not doing the job, you better go to prison now and we'll save some time and money."

\- "You are asking for results and in order to give you what you want when you want it I need to have qualified people."- said G.

\- "Nobody speaks three languages nowadays! not people in the field."- protested the delegate. G sighed, between Sam and himself they covered more than fifteen languages.

\- "Ok, if you can't find the people I can. I just need freedom and autonomy, no questions, no pressure, no explanations."

\- "You're asking for a blank check."

\- "The one I already had, yes."- he said calmly.

After a little debate one of the delegates addressed again to Callen.

\- "All right agent Callen. You'll have the money and the people."

\- "I want it in writing as well as Nell Jones and Henrietta Lange impunity in advance."

\- "And now you're asking for the Moon."

\- "In fact is not that much. You know that Hetty is not going to jail, because of her age, even a mediocre lawyer could succeed at spare her for that. And are you going to jeopardize the possibility of finish with the Molina cartel just for an analyst? I would be the only one responding for the operation and for the past actions. You need a scapegoat, I'm offering you one."

\- "I don't know if you're crazy or you're just playing hero, agent Callen. It's alright; we'll give you what you want. But in exchange we want you to personally supervise every detail of the operation, you'll be the one coordinating and managing every single person and I hope you're ready for the task."

\- "We'll know that soon, I guess."- said Callen standing up and more than ready to leave the room.

\- "One more thing, agent! You're not going in the field until you have a clean medical record. We don't want you to get killed at the first opportunity, a suicidal mission would be more than convenient for you."

\- "You'll have your record. I appreciate your concern as far as it goes."

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Hetty was happy of finally coming back home. She had managed to guarantee the operability of the unit even if the mission failed and, even without Callen's confirmation, she knew that in spite of the magnitude of the task in hand, the results were more than satisfactory. Three days ago just the perspective of get rid of jail seemed impossible, but her stubborn boy did it again. She was worried about him; she knew he hadn't slept a wink that night and how painful it would be for him to fly again. The whole taxi journey to the private airport Callen had remained still, with his eyes closed, apparently resting, but when they arrived he seemed to be as happy as Hetty.

\- "Ready to go home, Mr. Callen?" - she asked from the short stairs of the plane.

A little hesitation, an imperceptible gesture touching his ear, insignificant for everyone but for Hetty contradicted his answer:

\- "More than ready, Hetty."- he said going up after her.

Soon the private jet was ready to take off. Hetty and Callen were sat one in front of the other, two shots of tequila on the little table that separated them.

\- "Is a bit early to get drunk Hetty."- exclaimed G thinking at all the work he had to do before arriving to L.A. and hoping that the pain in his ear won't be so bad as it has been during the first flight.

\- "C'mon Mr. Callen, we need to celebrate! And we can always sleep during the flight."- she said cheerfully. – "And now, please, tell me what was in that flash drive, because we both know that the famous conversation with the Secretary was never recorded."- she leaned over the table curious. Callen smiled somewhat amused.

\- "Our last karaoke session"- he said gulping the tequila down.

\- "Ha, ha, ha! I thought it was Eric's "Call of Duty" victory on the big screen."

The plane was taking speed at the runway ready to take off in seconds.

\- "What… did you do, Hetty…?"- asked Callen losing his tie and trying to keep his eyes focused as a wave of sudden exhaustion took control of his body.

\- "Schhhh Mr. Callen, relax, don't fight it. You don't need to suffer."

His last thought before the drug made him to sleep was about Sam and the children.


	34. Chapter 34

A.N: I know it's frustrating for some of you not to have a solution right away. There're so much action to come! Thank you for reading and for your reviews I really appreciate you take your time to tell me your feelings :)

Chapter 34

The hours had passed very quickly on the open house day at the Keaton Military Academy. Sam and the kids had arrived in the first flight that morning. Aiden was about to start his last course and Kamran the first one. It was a huge step for everyone in the family.

\- "Ok, jellybean, I'll have to go in some minutes"- announced Sam.

\- "Dad! What if I don't like to be in here?"- asked Kamran in nearly a whisper. She was dressed in uniform and it was cool, very cool. Her room was nice, her roommate great and Aiden said the food was yummy. Nevertheless the moment of being left alone was a scary one.

\- "I'm sure you won't like it. You'll love it!"-tried to reassure her father.

\- "But what if I don't?"- she seemed distressed.

\- "In that case you can always come back and take care of your old man"- he cheated.

\- "You're not old!"- Kam laughed, somehow relieved.

\- "Listen, you still have tomorrow to familiarize with the surroundings before the classes begin on Monday. Time to shine, baby. You have to show from now that there's another Hanna in town."

\- "I'll make you proud, dad."

\- "You already did, sweetie."- said Sam trying to be strong. His baby was ready to fly solo and he will be more than alone.

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The headache was the first one to welcome him to the conscious world followed by the familiar discomfort in his hip caused by an antibiotic injection. He didn't know where he was or for how long he had been out, he didn't dare to open his eyes. Concentrating on his breathing he succeeded at raising a little an eyelid. At first he couldn't see anything, just light blue walls, but he didn't care, he felt like floating, it was hard to concentrate. Next time he tried, he focused and recognized Hetty's home. He was in his room. Hetty! She drugged him, again! Extending his hand he found a big bottle of water. He was thirsty, very thirsty. After he gulped half a litter he felt better. Opening completely his eyes he saw a note with Hetty's beautiful calligraphy:

"I hope you forgive me Mr. Callen. Please eat something, took a couple of aspirins for the headache and drink as much as you can. Alfred is at your service."

He showered and dressed in seconds and went downstairs.

\- "Hi kid! I wasn't expecting you for another hour. What did you do this time to get hurt?"

\- "Where's Hetty, Alfred?"

\- "She didn't say, and even if she did I couldn't tell you."

\- "Shit!"

\- "C'mon! Don't blame the messenger! I've even charged your cellphones, they were as out as you last night. Let's have lunch and…

\- "Lunch?! What time is it?- asked G alarmed.

\- "13h. Why? Are you late for a date?"

\- "I'm late for life!

\- "Well as you're already late you can spare some minutes to move a chess piece, it's your turn."

The older man managed to give Callen a sandwich and two aspirins while he was thinking in the library about his next move. G discovered he was really hungry so he advanced the knight and went to the kitchen to prepare another sandwich. On the table he saw his cellphones plugged; turning them on, G look over the list of lost calls that had increased during the night. Alfred entered the room at the sound of an angry male voice in the voicemail cursing in… what was that? Russian? Callen was pale and he could swear he saw a tear in the corner of his eye.

\- "Please, Alfred, I need to go" – he whispered.

They arrived to Arkady's house in less than an hour. From the rear mirror Alfred tried to figure out what happened, but G was concentrated on his cellphone.

\- "Thank you for the ride, Alfred, you don't have to wait for me, enjoy your time off."- he said as a farewell – "and, by the way, check!"- he added running in the direction of the main house.

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\- "Where is she?"- he asked to Arkadi who, seeing him coming on the security cam, went to the front door.

\- "How do you dare to come? I thought my message was more than clear: I don't want you in here"

\- "Where is she, Arkady?"

\- "Callen, I'm serious; go away! Now!"

\- "I'm not going until I speak to Anna. Where is she?"- G cried.

\- "She doesn't want to speak to you!"

\- "I'll go the moment she tell me to do so. Annaaaa!" - he called entering the house and going to the stairs.

Arkady did an imperceptible gesture with his head and four armed men appeared on the hall. Callen drew his gun and automatically Arkady's men aimed to him. G looked dangerous, the bruise on his cheek and the stitches on his eyebrow contributed to stress his determination. The tension was more than palpable.

\- "Arkady I'm not leaving, and, believe me, I don't have anything to lose."

Something in G's stare told Arkady that he wasn't lying. One of his men took the safe off and Callen aimed the gun to his head; he decided to put some good sense before someone got killed. With another gesture he indicated his men to lower the weapons.

Slowly Callen did the same; at this point this wasn't enough. Arkady was really pissed off. Extending his hand he asked his friend without words to give him the weapon. Finally it was Arkadi who won, and, reluctantly, Callen gave him his gun. Two of the men took Callen by the arms roughly and pushed him back to the porch, he didn't resist and it was precisely the lack of fight and the deep sadness that Arkady could read in his eyes that made him to change his mind.

\- " стоп (stop)"- he ordered – "идти (go)"

At the order the men set him free.

\- "What is wrong with you, Callen?"- asked Arkady softer this time.

\- "Please, let me see her, if she doesn't want to, I'll go; even forever if you want, but let me talk to her." – Arkady had never seen Callen begging.

\- "Follow me."

Callen followed his friend upstairs where Arkady stopped in front of a closed door that another armed men was watching over. Again a simple gesture was enough to make him to go away. Callen's impatience turned to dismay when Arkady opened the door.

Anna was lying on a bed, sleeping. She was pale. A big bandage surrounded her head and a loose lock of blond hair covered her eye. The room had the distinctive smell of antiseptic lotion.

In two strides G was at her side. Kneeled near the bed he didn't dare to touch her. A lump formed on his throat and he covered his mouth with his hand. Then, with infinite delicacy, he retired the lock of Anna's face. She didn't move. Arkady put a hand in Callen's shoulder and lead him to the exit. Neither of the two men talked until they arrived to the living room.

\- "What happened to her? how is she?"- Callen asked, a hint of fear in his voice.

\- "Fifteen stitches on the side of her head, concussion and bruises all over. Boris, who is also hurt, managed to bring her here before passing out. Yuri is death. I don't know what you were thinking about when you risked my daughter's life, I don't care what's going on, I don't care if the world finish today, but listen to me because I'm not going to say it twice, this is over! I don't want you near her!"

This was the first time in all his life that Callen saw Arkady so serious, but he was right; he wasn't good for Anna, she tried to tell him thousand times that he was crazy and now she was hurt because of him.

\- "I'm sorry" – said G.

This was the first time that Arkady saw Callen apologizing, his usual insolent attitude gone. He seemed sincere, somewhat lost.

\- "Listen"- he continued standing up and trying to hide a wince at the jab of his broken rib, -"I need to speak to Boris; it's important, Arkady. Don't worry, just two questions and I'll be gone."

\- "In the garden."

Callen found the Russian sat near the pool. He had his bandaged left hand in a sling and some scratches on his face.

\- "пуля" (bullet)?- asked G.

\- "да" (yes)

\- "что случилось?(what happened?)"

Boris described how in an apparently simple operation in which Anna, Yuri and himself have prevented another little drug deal of the cartel in West Hollywood, a van coming from nowhere shot their vehicle killing Yuri, who was driving, and hitting his hand. Their car rolled over several times and he was able to rescue an unconscious Anna before it blew up. He got to see the van to overtake them and flew away. They were Hispanic with modern automatic weapons.

Overwhelmed by the description and for what could have happened Callen shook Boris hand, traversed the garden and went out. He didn't hear Arkady calling him. Alone he walked his way out of the neighborhood. He was probably the only human being walking in L.A.

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Callen's pre-paid cellphone biped, breaking the silence of the night. Alone on the uncomfortable couch of the boat shed he was still trying to make sense of what had happened. He was more than sad. It was like having a hole in his chest that grew up when he read the text.

\- "I miss mum"

"Poor thing"- He thought. -"I don't have any right to complain."

\- "I know sweetie, me too. Casserole day."

\- "Yuck!"

\- "Yuck! :-D :-D :-D."

\- "I knew! U didn't like it!"

\- "Secret?"

\- "My lips are sealed."

\- "Good girl."

That night Kamran went to sleep with a smile and Callen felt less alone.


	35. Chapter 35

A.N: Yes, black clouds ahead for Callen, but he is a fighter and he has a plan. Thank you as always for your encouragements, you make me happy!

Chapter 35

When Hetty arrived at the mission before five in the morning she didn't expect to find anyone working so early.

\- "Good morning or should I say good night?"

\- "Hetty!"- Callen jumped from his chair startled.

\- "I hope you had rested."

\- "You drugged me again! I think that I've done sleeping for the next decade."- he accused her, walking to the area where she had her bureau.

\- "Forgive me, I miscalculated the dosage, you'd lost so much weight lately that probably two drops would have been enough now."

Callen rolled his eyes. He was more than mad at Hetty. Even if he could understand her reasons, she didn't have any right to sedate him against his will. In other circumstances he wouldn't talk to her for ages but now he needed her help and he couldn't afford to be pissed off. He needed all his capacity to face what was coming.

\- "Could I offer you some tea?"- asked Hetty who was already preparing the kettle.

\- "I'm good thank you"- he said signaling a cup of coffee in his table that in fact it was his second one. He sighed and sat on the sofa carefully. His back was bothering him and he couldn't find relief with any posture.

\- "Oh no, you're no good. And I'm not talking about your broken rib or your shoulder. I can see doubt in your eyes and if I did not know you, I would think that even fear."

\- "This is huge, Hetty."-it was his way of recognizing that she was right. For a moment he closed his eyes wishing to disappear, overwhelmed, insecure and tired.- "Really huge."

\- "Stand up Mr. Callen"- she said waiting for him to do it. Then she stood up just in front of him, very close, their feet nearly touching.

\- "Look at me my dear."-she said taking his hands.

Callen looked down. That close Hetty was tiny at his side.

\- "Size is a matter of perspective. A microscopic virus can kill an elephant. The power is in your brain, don't forget that. Think big Mr. Callen, think always big."

G smiled boosted by Hetty's encouragements and squeezed gentle her hands before let them loose.

\- "I'll need your help, please. I'll be unable to control the bureaucrats if I want to focus in the operational."

\- "I'll deal with them, I have the Secretary in a short leash, don't worry. What else do you need?"

\- "A teleconference with the persons responsible in L.A. for the C.I.A., the D.E.A., L.A.P.D. and Port Authority. Today in the afternoon. I'll need also the team and Connor and Murphy's units. And I need Eric, now, even in pajamas."

\- "Consider it done, Mr. Callen."

Eric arrived half an hour later yawning and munching a donut from a big greasy bag.

\- "G! good to …"- he stopped when he saw Callen's eyebrow and bruises - what happen to you?"

\- "Long story, Eric. I need your help and we don't have much time."

\- "Not even for donuts?" – he said offering the greasy bag.

\- "There's always time for a donut."-smiled Callen choosing one. He licked his sticky fingers.- "C'mon, I'll update you upstairs."

Taking advantage of the fact that Hetty was distracted phoning a big fish they snuck to ops with the bag. For the next ten hours they worked together on Callen's plan on the big screen. It was the first day of work for Eric after his time off in Hawaii and he was more than tired. He didn't understand why he was the only one in the team back, but Callen was relentless on the pursuit of his goal and each try he made to change the subject he was rewarded with G's silence.

\- "Why don't we call Nell? She can help me with the grid on the map and to get the access to the cameras."- tried again Eric.

\- "This time you're not going to work with her and I need you to dominate this from A to Z."

\- "Callen this means… the mission you'd sent me…"

\- "No, Eric. That mission is over, you did a good job, but now we have a bigger one. This only means that I have another plan for Nell. Trust me she'll be ok."- Callen said going out the operation center – "Don't overthink, and please, I need the screens downstairs in less than an hour."- he said nearly from the corridor looking still to Eric as the door closed.

G didn't hear that somebody was running from the stairs to ops, and nearly bumped into Deeks.

\- "Deeks!"- he exclaimed surprised.

\- "Hey Callen! I was looking… how do you…? – Deeks signaled his eyebrow.

\- "Long story, no time"- said Callen trying to pass at his side. Deeks put a hand in his chest to stop him.- "I know that Hetty asked to be here at five pm, but I came earlier just to speak to you."

\- "I'm sorry, when this is over…"

\- "Yeah, of course, Mr. "I don't have time for my friends.""

\- "Deeks it's not the moment, really."-Callen let him win the duel of gazes, but nothing else.

Deeks was more than annoyed; he had everything planned in his head about his conversation with Callen, even his possible answers. He needed to understand his absence and his silence, but above all he needed to check what kind of team leader he was following.

\- "Mr. Calleeen!"- called Hetty from downstairs, G dodged Deeks and went to the dressing area where Hetty was holding two suits. -"Lets get you dressed like a gentleman. Your big moment starts in some minutes and if you want to convince someone to follow you, you definitely need to change. They said that Napoleon wore a red shirt to prevent his troops from seeing the blood if he was hurt in the battle."

\- "No time Hetty! Besides, I can't go to the field and I'm not wearing red."

\- "Indeed, but nobody is going to follow a general in rags! This one."- She chose.

\- "Beige suit?"

\- "Not everybody has the style to wear a light suit, Mr. Callen, it denotes confidence as well as class and it's not perceived as aggressive. Here…"- she said handing the hanger- "…white shirt no tie. Try not to bleed on this one."

\- "I'll do my best."


	36. Chapter 36

A.N: Thank you for your support, it's very nice to know that you're enjoying. Your comments help me a lot! Now I let you to discover what Callen is planning :)

Chapter 36

In spite of Hetty's encouragements Callen was nervous. He was more a man of action than a man of words and he wasn't a team player even if he had learned how to do it. Now he had to lead more than one hundred hostile people who had never worked together before, and that probably didn't accept his authority.

Suddenly the connection was on. In front of him one screen divided in four sections, in each one the designed contact for the C.I.A., the D.E.A., the Port Authority and L.A.P.D. and their respective teams; behind him another screen, a big touch one with a satellite image of the city that Eric put together some minutes ago.

Sat at one side were the N.C.I.S. units with Hetty, of course, Kensi, Deeks, Eric and Nell who seemed more united than ever, and Murphy with his team.

Callen took a deep breath, cleared his throat and started:

\- "Ladies, gentlemen, good afternoon. First of all I want to thank you for your availability in such a short notice, I'm well aware of the value of your time and I really appreciate you being here. For those who do not know me my name is …"- here he did an imperceptible pause- "…Grisha Callen currently team leader of the special first unit of the N.C.I.S., here in L.A., and former C.I.A. and D.E.A., specialized in undercover operations for more time that I can recall."

Some smiles appeared on the screens. Callen continued. He was looking imposing in Hetty's suite, classic enough for the old school directors, bold and casual for the white collar operatives. The bruises on his face and the butterfly stitches were his credentials to win over the field agents.

\- "As you probably already know, I've been designated by the Secretary of Defense, Edmond Richardson, to coordinate a joint operation against the Molina cartel which ought to be the definitive one."

Kensi and Deeks exchanged looks with Nell and Eric, all four more than surprised, and some murmurs came from the screens.

Callen stopped the comments with a simple gesture of his hand and a defiant look.

\- "We are on the same boat here and I'm not going to lie to you: the only person, who is going to hang a medal on his neck if we succeed, is the Secretary of Defense. We'll gain cleaner streets and, if we're lucky, a greeting card next Christmas from Washington probably without an extra pay."

This time laughs came from the screens.

\- "The Molina cartel. What do we know about it? A Mexican national called Guillermo Molina, settled with his large family in South California. He previously lived in Colombia for five years where he stablished connections with the guerrilla. His plan was quite simple: to recover drugs from Colombia and to introduce them in U.S.A. via Mexico. With the money, and in exchange for the drugs, the family will provide the guerilla with weapons. The first operation of the cartel in L.A. was in 1992, when they succeed at introducing 500 Kg of cocaine in the country and killed two marines. Since then, the organization grew up and nowadays, it's the main leader in the black market of all California. We estimated that presently it has more than 250 members mainly born in our country and there isn't an only leader, we know at least three of them: Julio Molina, his brother Alberto Molina and Rico Cabrera." – Callen paused as he showed some blurry pictures of the suspects on the big screen.

He could see that some of his spectators were losing the train of his thoughts and were moving restless on their chairs. He looked at the floor trying to regain the control of the situation. The pause was longer than a normal one and Hetty started to worry. Callen was pale. Some quiet steps sounded in the bullpen of the mission, but everybody was looking at G. In low voice and raising progressively his tone Callen recited by heart looking at the people in the screen right in the eye:

\- " Raul Dempsey, Brian Folk, Fred Ground, Sara Taylor, Marion Cooper, Elijah Hagenbourger, David Troian, Laura Garcia, Ralph Morrison, Alonso Gomez, Elena Zenith, Gordon Cameron, Harry Kim, Bill Bishop, Andrew Rodriguez, Nathan Deschamps, Fito Herrera, Carmen Lucas, Nicholas Lee and Johan Smith-Fritz"

Callen accompanied his words with the images of each one of the persons of the list.

\- "Some between us knew this persons, they were colleagues, friends, they used to work with us and they were killed. C.I.A., D.E.A., N.C.I.S., L.A.P.D. and Port Authority we all want the same, the possibility of finishing the cartel who is killing our people. This is not about taking credit or someone's caprice in Washington. It's about justice, it is about us."

At this point a silence was nearly tangible; Callen's words had touched the heart of each one of the listeners and he got all the attention he needed to explain his plan. He continued his speech:

\- "I'm aware of the enormity or this mission and of the shortage of staff, - we all suffer the scarce budget, - for this I'm only asking you to lend me ten persons in two units of four; four field agents and two technicians who will act as coordinators. I need people able to speak Spanish and Russian if possible. If not, anything but English."

A timid hand from the representative of Port Authority was seen on the screen.

\- "Yes Lisa?"- asked Callen.

\- "We can't even dedicate two people to your project Callen, nevertheless we are more than interested in the success of this mission."

\- "In fact the only thing I need, we all need, from you, is information. You don't even have to dedicate someone to pass it, just the access to your real time database will be precious."

\- "That I can do it." – she affirmed relieved.

\- "Thank you."

\- "What are you going to do with such a little team Callen? as you said the Molina cartel has more than two hundred members, it is nearly an army in the streets."

\- "You're right Walter, I'm counting also with the help and resources such as the network of informants that each one of the agencies has and some army veterans already in place."

Callen turned and touched the screen behind him where a map of L.A. appeared. Touching it again a grid divided artificially the map, but in a way that respected the morphology of the city. He started his explanation:

\- "Los Angeles will be divided in 64 areas 8 from North to South and 8 from East to West. We will position one unit per area from the South covering the 16 first areas of the city. We will prevent each little transaction, each little movement, each little extortion or business the cartel could have, providing an alternative. From there we will move forward obliging the cartel to back up. Sooner or later they'll have to face us.

\- "I don't understand Callen, what alternative do you mean?"- asked the assistant director of the C.I.A.

\- "Exactly what the cartel is offering. Drugs and weapons mainly"- answered G without hesitation.

Even Kensi and Deeks roared with laughter. But Callen remained composed and serious.

\- "Are you kidding right?"

\- "No, Charles I'm not kidding. This operation is at the most high level, we have carte blanche."

\- "What do you mean exactly?"

\- "That we can use the same weapons that the cartel. No laws, no limits to debunk its deals; the only rule I'll impose and it isn't negotiable is not collateral damage. Any more questions?"

A murmur extended in the bullpen and in the screens, nobody could believe such freedom, being accustomed to follow law and protocols for each little action.

\- "Hey man do you know that you're crazy?"

Callen thought about Anna feeling suddenly sad and tired. His back was killing him and he knew he had to sit soon.

\- "Yeah, Warren, I've been told that. And now if you don't have more questions I'll conclude asking you to select your units today. Don't let the language skills to be a problem; you know the profile I'm looking for. Tomorrow at noon I would like to address to everyone again"- he paused to add next: "Ladies, gentlemen, I don't need to remember you the confidentiality of this mission. Thank you very much for your attention and for your help."

One by one the screens went black and the N.C.I.S. team stood up commenting between them and with Hetty what had just happened. Callen sighed and touched his eyebrow when he felt a strip pulling, slightly dizzy, and exhausted, he definitely needed a painkiller. From behind the column next to his table a person advanced.

\- "Sam!"


	37. Chapter 37

N.A.: I know, I know, sorry for the waiting. I hope you guys like it! thank you for reading!

Chapter 37

In an impulse G hugged Sam, letting both of them surprised at the reaction.

\- "I didn't know you were here. How are you?" he asked anxious, he had started to feel dizzy some minutes ago and he knew that Sam would notice it at once.

\- "Amazed. It's the first time since we know each other that you said more than three words altogether. What a speech!"- he said, the banter coming natural to him. G smiled.

\- "Yeah Callen that was impressive. I didn't know you were such an orator. Hello Sam!" - said Kensi approaching and hugging her two friends.

\- "Hi Kens; you look good."- said Callen happy to have a distraction from Sam's examination.

\- "Thanks, sunshine and beach."

Deeks was some steps behind the group; he saluted Sam without looking at G. On the other hand Sam didn't take his eyes off Callen.

\- "What's this, G?" - he said doing a vague gesture with his hand.

\- "Just one of Hetty's fancy suits."

\- "I mean this" – Sam said this time taking G by the chin and turning his head to have a more clear view of his cut eyebrow and the bruises.

Sam let some of his frustration out and his touch was more brusque than pretended. G not expecting that, reacted and pushed Sam's hand in the same abrupt way, looking at him hurt.

\- "A bigger guy?"- asked Kensi feeling the sudden tension between the two friends.

\- "No, four of them."- answered G still annoyed.

\- "Five Mr. Callen, they were five"- intervened Hetty who had followed the exchange from some distance and sensed problems.

\- "Hello Sam"- she saluted- "it's good to see you".

\- "Thank you, Hetty, is good to see you too."- he said hugging her. Addressing to Callen again he exclaimed:

\- "So you were alone for some days, you become a politician and you get in trouble" -his tone wasn't kind, but all the emotions of the past three weeks were surfacing.

\- "Not that I had much choice, believe me."- G answered in low voice, sweat started to form in his forehead. He touched his ear unconsciously. He was feeling weaker by the minute and it scared him. Last thing he wanted was their team mates saw him passing out.

\- "Congratulations are in order Mr. Callen, you had everyone eating right out of your hand."

Callen looked at the floor blushed without a quick joke or an ingenious or cheeky sentence to answer Hetty, and that was also a first for Sam to see.

\- "Let's go to have dinner"- proposed Kensi -"it looks that Eric had already started and I'm starving."

They looked at the wonder twins. Eric was explaining to Nell how the screen system worked while eating a big sandwich. G looked helpless for a second and Hetty went to the rescue.

\- "I'm afraid that Mr. Callen and I couldn't join you today. We have a teleconference in exactly two minutes and we'll be busy for the next hours."- she lied.

\- "C'mon Hetty we have to catch up!"- begged Kensi.

\- "You can blame the Secretary of Defense, my dear, he's such a party pooper!"

\- "Ok, let's go."- said Deeks speaking for the first time and initiating the march.

\- "See you tomorrow Callen"

\- "Good night, Kens. Guys."- he answered.

\- "Talk to you later G."- said Sam with a look that meant business, going with the others reluctantly.

Callen made a farewell gesture with his hand, and the moment the others left he leaned his back against the column and closed his eyes. Even if he was willing for the guys to go he couldn't help but feeling excluded from the group; the bond between them was stronger than before. Hetty approached looking at him worried.

\- "Can you make it to the couch?"

\- "Yeah, yeah, I'll be fine, I just need to lay down for a second"- he said as he walked feeling his legs like jelly. When finally he sat down he had to bit his lip for not crying.

\- "Is your ear hurting again?"

\- "Everything hurts and I don't know why"- he said with a grimace as he laid. Hetty knew that he wasn't exaggerating.

\- "You didn't eat today, did you?"

\- "Yeah I did!"

\- "What?"

\- "Donuts"

\- "Yes, in ops and at six in the morning, Mr. Callen, it's eight thirty in the afternoon."

\- "I was busy and not hungry. I forgot. Are you telling me that I'm in pain for not eating?"

\- "I've seen it before, in Vietnam, prisoners in the camps deprived of food and sleep were permanently dizzy and their suffered hyper sensibility among other symptoms."

\- "Hetty this is not a forced-labor camp. The doctor in Washington said I'm fine!"- he said weakly supporting his head between the arms.

\- "Are you?"

Hetty gave him a mug and two pills. G looked at her, he didn't want to end sedated like last time.

\- "It's just ibuprofen, Mr. Callen. Drink, all of it."

\- "Disgusting" - he protested, but he took the pills and drank it anyway.

\- "Yes, tea with a lot of sugar, but apparently is what you need."

He was paler than some minutes ago and his skin looked clammy.

\- "Try to rest now. I come back in a minute."

When Hetty come back she found G sleeping on the couch, the shirt wet with sweat and the suit all wrinkled. She touched his front, it was lightly hot.

\- "Bugger!"

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Still munching their burritos the rest of the team were talking about the strange mission and Callen's teleconference.

\- "Hey Beale wake up! You've spent all day with him. What the hell is doing Callen?"- Called Deeks.

\- "Don't remind me! I arrived at 6am and Callen was already working, it was exhausting!"

\- "But what did you do?"- asked Sam

\- "We prepared the teleconference. He needed the grid on the map, but he supervised every street such that in each one of the intersections we'll find at least a security cam. Then I did the program in order that every agency could have access to the web cam and the signal on live simultaneously with the same information. Then he made me double check the statistics of every operation done by the Molina cartel the last ten years and after…"

\- "All right, Eric, we get an idea."- cut Deeks earning a nudge from Kensi.

\- "Why didn't you call me, Beale?"- asked Nell.

\- "Callen didn't want to."- he said not wanting to elaborate. Luckily Sam changed the subject:

\- "How was he, Eric?"

\- "Well, you know Callen, he ate nearly all my donuts in ops, but he was all business. He passed more than 3 hours studying documents and files without raising his eyes from the screen. No time to chat really."

Somewhat reassured Sam didn't insist, the conversation changed and he expend the next minutes talking about their kids' first day of school. Eric felt asleep again and they decided to go home. Next day they will have the opportunity of knowing more details about the mission.

First thing Sam did the moment he closed the door was to phone G. He needed to talk to him. What was that of a quarrel with five guys in Washington and that crazy mission? At the third tone the voicemail biped. G knew he was going to call and he disconnected the phone. He felt more hurt than disappointed this time.


	38. Chapter 38

A.N: You're the best readers in the world! thank you very much for your support.

Chapter 38

G bore with patience the X-rays and with stoicism the treatment of the wound on his eyebrow, the burn of his shoulder which started to hurt again, and the invasive poke and prod in his ear, but when I took more than fifteen minutes and two persons to draw blood from his sore veins he was ready to kill someone. After last night episode Hetty scheduled an appointment in a private medical facility with Reyes Costa who was visiting L.A. again. G was angry when he learned it, too much work to do, but he recognized that he needed help to get better. He couldn't afford to get dizzy anymore; nevertheless he hated doctors, hospitals and needles, he hadn't decided in which order yet. After the torture session Dr. Costa told him that everything was healing nicely.

\- "So if I'm good why I'm feeling so low?"- asked Callen.

\- "Because you had subjected your body to an incredible stress. The infection you got put you on the verge of a septicemia, you've been on antibiotics for three weeks and you have a broken bone and open wounds. Another person in your circumstances would have been on complete bed rest for a week and taking it very easy for two months. You, on the contrary didn't take time to recuperate. You'd lost more than 13 pounds; you have been moving and even travelling by plane. The pressure didn't cause extra damage, but I guess it wasn't a pleasant trip. Your eardrum is healing well and if you avoid loud noises, headphones, planes, of course, sudden head movements and blows, I'm pretty confident you'll have a complete recovery which is just a miracle."

\- "When?"

\- "If you rest enough probably in around a month, but this are not mathematics."

\- "And the dizziness?"

\- "One of the consequences of the infection was the low blood pressure, as your normal one is already low, which on the other hand is a good thing, is perfectly logical that you're feeling tired, dizzy and even sick."

\- "How can I know if I'm feeling dizzy because of the ear of because of the blood pressure?"

\- "Well, usually your ear will make a ringing before you feel dizzy, you'll need to lay down and wait until it stops. If you have nauseas it would be difficult to control them without medication and your blood pressure can get down very quickly putting even your life at risk. That's what happened to you in Washington according to the medical record. On the contrary if you feel dizzy because of your blood pressure, the buzzing in your ears will occur after you start to feel bad. Just eating salty or getting some sugar quickly can prevent a faint."

\- "So no solution for now." - Callen was pissed off.

\- "My recommendation is lots of rest and good food at regular hours; to restore your levels it would be a good idea a vitamin complex, but never as a substitute of a meal. We had to wait the analysis results to know your real needs."

\- "Can I drive?"

\- "What I've just told you about resting?"

\- "It would be worse if I walk, believe me."

\- "I guess you can if you're very careful."

\- "What about training?"

\- "You didn't get it, do you?"

\- "I need to know when I would be able to be in the field."

\- "The limit is the pain. Don't force your body, if it hurts and you don't stop you'll be worse."

\- "Could you write it down?"

\- "What exactly?"

\- "That I can drive and train."

\- "I don't know how Hetty put up with you!"

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The team was already at the mission when G arrived in a hurry. The teleconference with the operative units started in half an hour and he wasn't ready. Like the previous day Eric was working to place the screens and testing the connections with the agencies. The others were drinking coffee and chatting with Murphy's team, they seemed closer than ever, the easy banter, the laughs, the touching, more than a family. G went directly at the coffee machine and he smiled when he saw a big basket of fruits, nuts, cereal bars and bottles of water. Hetty's way to remind him to eat. He rolled the sleeves of his shirt down to hide the needle marks, took a banana and a bottle of water and went to meet Eric.

\- "Hi guys! Everything ready Eric?"

\- "Nearly, give me two minutes"- he said, tapping on his tablet.

\- "Thanks"

\- "A banana, G, really?"- asked Sam approaching.

\- "I'm hungry. Besides I'm not the only one you know who eat bananas anytime."

\- "The little one. I don't know if she could do it at the Academy. It will be hard to her to adjust."

\- "She's fine, Sam"- said Callen nonchalantly.

\- "And you?"

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "You didn't answer the phone last night."- Sam tried to control the rage in his voice. First G talked about his daughter without having seen her for weeks and now he answered his question with another one.

\- "Sorry about that. I…"- he doubted about what to say, but finally decided to be sincere –"…I was exhausted and fell asleep on the couch."

Sam knew it was true and he couldn't be mad for the missing call. At least not for that one.

\- "You didn't look good yesterday."

\- "Big headache. I guess I overdid with the preparation of the teleconference."

\- "What is going on G?"

\- "Exactly what I explained. It's time to finish the Molina cartel"

\- "Calleeeen! One minuteee!" – informed Eric.

\- "I've to go."- said G going to the center of the space he asked everyone to take their seats. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hetty at her desk, he hadn't notice when she had arrived. How the hell she does that?- he thought.

In seconds the screen lighted up and Callen saw the expectant faces of the teams from the C.I.A., D.E.A. and L.A.P.D. Without the presence of the big bosses from the previous day the ambience was somehow more relaxed. Everyone seemed pleased at seeing Callen dressed with his usual jeans and a plaid blue shirt, but the people from the C.I.A..

\- "Good morning everyone. I know that you sent me your C.V. and I appreciate it, I didn't have time to know you yet, but I promise I'll do. If you are here it is because you've been selected for being part of one the biggest operations against a cartel implanted in our country.

\- "Why now, Callen? The Molina cartel exists since I was in school."- asked a Tom Jones from the D.E.A.

\- "I'm not the one who should answer that question. I'm following orders as well as you. We are merely the executors. Please let me expound the plan and I'll answer your questions at the end."

Right after, Callen showed on the other screen the map divided with the grid and explained again the division and how he wanted the teams moving. He summoned the coordinators for a reunion in the boatshed the next morning in order to set the parameters and continued with the polemic points:

\- "The teams in the field must avoid communicating in English. When this operation started we let the cartel believe that the Russians were behind just because we were operating under very special circumstances. If you don't speak Russian, do it in Spanish. That would be confusing for the cartel; usually they have certain feeling of impunity because they think we aren't able to understand them." – he paused for a second and continued:

\- "Clothing is important. Nothing remarkable. Nothing remotely military. The key word is "camouflage". Financial district I want you wearing suits. Hollywood Boulevard shorts, sunglasses and cameras and so on. Jeans and a black sweater will do it. You have to become invisible."- so far Callen just described the basics of the undercover work, and everyone seemed to agree with the premises.

\- "About the weapons, feel free to use whatever you need even if your weapon overpowers the one of your opponent. Needless to say that you can't use nor your service weapon nor a registered one. As I told you yesterday the only rule to follow is to protect the civil population. No collateral damage and no undesired casualties. It's that clear?" – Callen paused and looked in the eye at each one of the people in front of him. Once he was sure the message had passed he continued– "The same way there's no law, there won't be detentions."- a wave of protests and comments went out of the screens, and even the N.C.I.S. members were more than surprised. – "We have to act like criminals, remember? We need to force the head of the cartel out and we won't if they sensed we're behind. If we cut the head of the snake, the snake will be death anyway. We'll get the information to act in the future, but not until the main responsible of the cartel fall. If I consider one of you is risking the operation, this person will be out, without protests or questions."

\- "At the end of each day I want a report from each coordinator and I'll be the one giving the orders."

Callen continued with the little details for another half an hour and then cut the communication with the agencies. He felt more confident each time he had to speak in public, but he didn't like at all being the center of attention. Now he needed to do the most difficult task: to speak with his team. He had made a decision and he knew that it won't be a popular one, in fact it could tear the team apart.


	39. Chapter 39

A.N: Do you really think that things are bad? wait and read ;) thank you

Chapter 39

\- "Mr. Callen" – saluted Hetty- "I've just read the medical report you let in my desk. What can I say? You, handsome devil, managed again to trick a doctor to get the results you want. You know that when this operation starts I'll pass more time in Washington than here and I won't be able to save your sorry ass again."

\- "I'll take it easy, promised" – smiled G.

\- "But you're not here for that. What can I do for you?"

G told her his plan. When he finished Hetty sighed:

\- "Are you sure this is the good thing to do right now?"

\- "I know them, Hetty, even if they didn't agree I'm convinced that in the long term it's the best decision. When can you bring him back?"

\- "Not before a week, I'm afraid."

\- "Good. Wish me luck."- he said going to the boatshed.

\- "You'll need more than that Mr. Callen"- said Hetty for herself.

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\- "Why are you so nervous?" – asked Kensi to Deeks.

\- "Callen told me that he wants to speak with me."

\- "Ha, ha, ha! And…?"

\- "I don't know, there was something about the way he said it that I didn't like."

\- "C'mon Deeks! It's Callen!"

\- "Yeah, it's Callen"- he said going out.

When Deeks arrived to the boatshed G was helping himself a coffee.

\- "Hi Deeks. Coffee?"- he asked.

\- "I'm good. Why here, Callen?

G sat carefully on a chair at the big table, his rib protested at the movement and he couldn't help a grimace that didn't go unnoticed. Deeks sat in front of him.

\- "They hit you for good."

\- "Yeah, they got me… but we're not here to talk about my bruises. We're here for some privacy."-Callen paused- "Yesterday you wanted to talk to me."- he affirmed looking Deeks in the eyes.

\- "Yes. And you didn't have time."- he reproached.

\- "No, I hadn't; as you could check, yesterday I was pretty busy."

\- "Like the day before yesterday and the last three weeks."

\- "As a matter of fact yes, Deeks, I've been pretty busy for the last three weeks. If you have something to say go for it now."

The tension was building up. Deeks didn't expect to have a conversation like that and Callen had things more important to do than waiting for Deeks to decide. Deeks was nervous, It was now and never and even if he didn't like it he knew that Sam deserved his sincerity.

\- "Ok, I'll say it. I'm very disappointed with you; you let Sam and the kids down so many times when he needed you in the worst time of their life. Nell came to me crying because she thinks she needs a lawyer not only to keep her job, but herself out of prison. Kensi, oh Kens! You don't deserve her as friend. She tried to justify the unjustifiable, she even cried when you didn't come to Hawaii. Yes, Kensi crying. I didn't know how to fix things, I needed you there and you didn't even answer the phone!"- his tone of voice had been raising and he shouted his last phrase at the same time he stood up and threw the chair to the floor.

Callen gulped. He felt guilty for not being able to be there for his friends, he thought that the preparations for the burial, the trip to Hawaii, the craziness of Washington were enough for them, but maybe he had been wrong all that time. He sight, this wasn't the moment for regrets. He needed his team, operational and working. In a low calmed voice he asked without moving from his chair:

\- "Have you finished? Because if you did, stop walking, pick the damn chair, sit down and listen to me."

Deeks stopped. He didn't expect Callen to be so cold, so indifferent, but something in his tone made him to calm down and sit again. G looked at Deeks deep in the eyes, challenging him. This time he wasn't going to let him win.

\- "Listen to me: I apologize for not letting you to cry in my shoulder when you needed. For not being there to fix the things you couldn't fix. If you need me to say that I'm sorry, well, I'm sorry Deeks. If Sam, Kensi or Nell have a problem with my behavior they don't need a lawyer to talk to me. Thank you for your services anyway."

G knew he was being hard on Deeks, the guy didn't deserve that, but it was time for him to face reality.

\- "Now that we had the conversation you wanted, we'll have the conversation I want"- continued Callen imposing his control over a shocked Deeks. – "I need you as the coordinator of one of the L.A.P.D. units and I need you to choose the other one to work with."

\- "What?!"- cried Deeks.

\- "I think I made myself clear"

\- "Do you want me out of here? And Kensi? She is not going into the field without me!"

\- "Well, this isn't your decision to make. I'll be the one deciding that."

\- "Oh gosh! are you kidding right?! You can't do that Callen!"- now Deeks had tears in his eyes.

\- "I already did it. Of course if you disagree or you aren't ready for the responsibility you can request an unpaid leave or even resign. It's up to you."

\- "I'm not going to give you that pleasure"- he said angry gritting his teeth and fists.

\- "Good, because I need you to join your unit right now and I'm expecting the first report tomorrow first thing in the morning."

\- "How could you…?" – unable to speak without crying Deeks went out of the boatshed. He showed his anger by a slam of the door when he left.

Callen waited sat on his chair barely moving. His coffee was cold matching his mood and his heart. The wait didn't take long. Kensi entered the boatshed like a hurricane and face him more than angry.

\- "Is it true that you fired Deeks?"- she shouted.

\- "If you mean that I designated Deeks as a coordinator with L.A.P.D. yes, it's true"- said Callen softly.

\- "Why, Callen, why did you do that? I get that he pissed you off…"

\- "Kens, please, look at me – said G raising his hands in surrender gesture- do you really think that this decision is a revenge for something Deeks could have said to me?"

Kensi sat in the chair occupied previously by her fiancé; it was her way of saying that she believed him.

\- "I need him, Callen."- she affirmed. G could read the fear in her eyes and he didn't like it.

\- "No, you don't, it's just that you think you do."

\- "Why are you doing this to us?"- she asked anguished.

\- "Not to you. I'm doing this for the mission. I've worked at the C.I.A. and the D.E.A., but never at L.A.P.D. The network we're creating must be a strong one, and strength is based in confidence. I don't trust L.A.P.D. and I don't know how to work with them, but I do trust Deeks, I do know him and I do know how he works. I need him there right now because he is the best to do this job."

\- "I understand."- she said accepting it – "So I'm going to work with Sam?"

\- "No, Kens. – answered Callen- You're going to the D.E.A.'s second unit with Talia del Campo."

Kensi was taken aback. She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. Standing up she leaned on the table, denied with her head and finally said:

\- "You know what? I always thought that we were family, that our ties went far beyond work. Now if you want to break these ties keep on like that. You're doing a great job."

\- "Duly noted. Talia is waiting for you tomorrow at 7am. Send my regards."

Her slam on the door was stronger than Deeks' one.

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Alone one more time G took the cellphone out of his pocket. He looked for the number, stared at the screen for a minute and pressed the green button. Anna didn't answer.


	40. Chapter 40

A.N: I know, from bad to worse and from worse to... let see! :) thank you for reading!

Chapter 40

Sargent Ben was looking for something to eat in a trash bin when someone handed him a paper bag that smelled like heaven.

\- "Carlson! You look like shit."

\- "And I feel like one Sargent."- said Callen- "Do you mind if I join you?"- he asked.

\- "Be my guest."

They both sat on the sidewalk and started to eat.

\- "This is good."

\- "Yeah, I don't know if it's very nutritious, but it's damn good" - Callen tried to swallow another piece of meat, but he wasn't hungry at all and the smell of his companion wasn't helping either.

\- "Troubles in paradise Carlson?"- asked the Sargent Ben speaking with full mouth and signaling with the sfork Callen's eyebrow.

\- "In paradise, in hell and everywhere in between right know."

\- "When I have problems I sat and I do nothing, sometimes they go the same way they've come."

\- "Mines are here to stay, I'm afraid."

\- "That's because you're creating them."

Callen laughed.

\- "You're right Sargent."

\- "You're not here just to invite me to eat. You need to know what is going on in the streets. Am I wrong?"

\- "Right again."

\- "And if I guess why you're here you'll stop playing with your food and can I keep it for diner?"

Callen smiled and closed his box.

\- "All yours anyway."

\- "You have a special mission for old Sargent Ben."

\- "Three of three. Your lucky day. – he said giving him twenty bucks- I need you to take care of someone for me."

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He was aware that the clock was ticking and that he didn't have time for personal affairs, but he positively knew that he couldn't move a finger without knowing. Instead of going directly to the mission Callen discovered himself driving to Arkady's place. He parked more than one block away and walked from there avoiding all the security cams. Last time he checked he had less than now installed, probably the new ones were in his honor. Nevertheless he hid and waited. Ten minutes later he was ready to go, at least in his head he had the entire choreography, he was about to find out if he was able to execute his plan.

Ok. Brick, support, wall, garbage bin, one, two three jump! Arrrrrgggg! C'mon breathe! Tree. One, two steps, up! One, two, three, four, five…go, go, go! Shiiiiiit! This barbed-wire fence is devilish. Ok, ok, too high, move to the vine. Slide. Damnit. Good. One, two, three, four, run! Against the wall… now. Cool. Shit, it hurts. Ok, second window to the right. Support and jump! Move, move, move. Stop. Ok, ten seconds. Breathe and go. Feint, balance, right hand. Arrrrrgggg! Jump! Breathe. Five, four, three, two, one. Go!

And with a single movement G entered to Anna's room by the little balcony of her father's house.

She was alone, sleeping in the long chaise, a video game on the flat screen was still on. Probably she felt sleep playing. Callen advanced quietly. He just needed to check that she was ok and he'll be going. He kneeled at her side and tried to keep his heart in step with hers. His ribs killing him, his muscles protesting and his head throbbing. He wanted to tell her so many things! That he never expected to feel like that for a person, that she made him laugh, that each day was a good surprise with her, that …

\- "You stink"- she said making him laugh.-"How do you…?"

\- "I just jumped the wall and scaled my way here. How're you Anna?"

\- "Sore, mostly. My head hurts and I don't remember much of the last days, but I'm better. Pissed off with Arkady and with you, but better."

\- "I'm sorry, really, when I knew I…"- his voice decided to stop cooperating and his eyes reflected the sadness he was feeling.

\- "It's ok, I'll be ok"- she said touching his face gently- "not like you, this are fresh ones"- she added signaling his bruises-"you better clean that cut before it gets infected."

\- "Yes ma'am."

\- "And now you're being a gentleman just to humor me, but you're not going to take care of you."- she was worried and angry.

\- "Complete doctor check-up yesterday. I can drive and even train."

\- "Yes but no jump walls, run in zig zag, get caught on barbed-wire protection, scale vines…"

\- "… and kissing the lady."

\- "You're not going to kiss me smelling like that!"

The noise of steps approaching made them to stop talking.

\- "You need to go or Arkady is going to kill us. Use the tree and the lateral door."

\- "And the cams?"

\- "I'm not only playing games with this" –she said pressing a button on the control and showing him all the security system of the house.

The handle moved and before the door opened Callen stole a kiss from Anna and jumped to the tree. Ten minutes later he was walking to his car limping and hurting all over, but reassured and happy.

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\- "Mr. Callen! What is that smell?" – said Hetty approaching to Callen's desk. G had arrived some minutes ago and he was working in his computer. – "One thing is to dress like a homeless and another one is to smell alike!"

\- "Hetty…"

\- "Don't Mr. Callen. Go, take a shower and pick some trousers of your size, unless you want to continue showing to the word your yellow boxers."

Callen was going to reply, but he had nothing to do against Hetty. In fact a hot shower could be a good idea for his sore muscles.

Fifteen minutes later he was on the dress room freshly dressed. One of the butterfly stitches was gone with the water and the wound was open. Clumsily he was trying to fix it when the door opened. It was Sam.

\- "G."

\- "Hi Sam. I didn't know you were here."

\- "I was training. You're bleeding G."

\- "It's nothing."

\- "Yeah, nothing as the stiffness when you move or nothing as the weight you lost. Sit here under the light."

\- "I'm still sore and I've lost the same weight as you. How are you Sam?"

Sam took gauzes, disinfectant and sterile strips from the first aid cabinet on the wall. He washed his hands and decided to avoid answering the question. He didn't want to have that conversation right now. Not in a dress room with people passing and not like that. He took G's chin and turned his head to the light. Carefully took off the rest of the butterfly stitches.

\- "Ok, you know the drill."- he said pouring the liquid on the wound and cleaning thoroughly the eyebrow.- "Hold on still."

G tensed and closed the eyes, it hurt like hell, and he knew for previous experiences that Sam wasn't being as gentle as he usually was, but he bear the pain without protest.

\- "You didn't answer my question."- G said trying to look Sam in the eyes, but he avoided the eye contact.

\- "Be still."- he said taking G's chin again. –"What's that?" –he asked seeing for the first time the recent scar there.- "And don't said nothing."- he put an antibiotic ointment on the cut making G hiss at the sudden sting. Usually Sam warned him.

\- "I fell down, Hetty fixed me."- He felt the pressure of the strips and at the last one he stood up glad to be free.

\- "You're lying."- Sam was angry.

\- "I'm not. By the way, you're not coming back to work until you don't pass an evaluation."- Counterattacked G hurt.

\- "What?!

\- "Physical and psychological"

\- "Are you kidding right?"

\- "I'm not."

\- "This is Hetty's decision? Because I'm going to…"

\- "It's mine, and it's my last word. Thank you for this." – he said firmly.


	41. Chapter 41

A.N.: I can't believe that this is chapter 41. This story has a life on its own and sometimes I get as surprised as you. Thank you for sharing it with me.

Chapter 41

Hetty saw Sam running stairs up picking his bag from his chair and going out still in his sport clothes. One minute later she saw a showered and bandaged Callen slowly going up the same stairs and sat on his desk like he had ran a marathon.

She only hoped for the good of the unit that Callen knew what he was doing.

G was hurt, sad, but, above all, angry with himself for being rude with Sam. Now it was too late, he hurt him and even if he didn't regret his decision he knew he could have found a better way to make him understand it. Out of the corner of his eye Callen saw Nell and Eric trying to hide behind a plant. So much to learn about camouflage yet!

At the third try they made to move, he called them:

\- "Ok guys. What do you want?"

\- "How do you ...?"- started to ask Eric but Callen glaze made him stop – "never mind. Well, we were wondering..."

\- "Who Nell or you?"

\- "What?"

\- "Who wants to speak to me? it's that you, Nell, or do you want to say something, Eric?"

The wonder twins looked at each other, confused.

\- "Well, in fact both of us"- said Eric.

\- "Ok. Could you wait on the couch Nell, please? I'll go to speak to you in a second."- said gently Callen signaling the couch to Nell who seemed appalled.

\- "Well... we..."

But Callen stare didn't leave room for doubt and Nell left.

\- "So, Eric, what can I do for you?"

\- "I mean, you know, it's about what you said about Nell and me... you know..."

\- "Yes?"

\- "And we want..."

\- "Eric, Eric, stop. Listen to me for a second. Do you have job to do?"

\- "Yes, but..."

\- "Do you have any problem or any doubt about what do you have to do?"

\- "No, no, Callen, it's clear."

\- "Is it about your work space then? is something missing, any new material you need, the parking place or there is any problem I can solve?"

\- "No, no, I mean everything is fine."- Eric was confused.

\- "So, if it's not about job it's something personal. Are you feeling ok? are you sick? do you have family problems?"

\- "No Callen!"

\- "Well, then sorry but I can't help you. Good talk. And now it seems that Nell wants to speak with me. If you excuse me." - he said letting Eric without words for once in his life. When Eric went back to ops Callen approached to the couch were Nell was waiting. He sat heavily and sighed at the pain on his back.

\- "You ok?"- asked Nell.

\- "Sore and tired, but I'll survive" -he smiled- "and you Nell? we haven't spoken for a while" - he could say that she wasn't fine. She seemed even younger and completely lost when Eric went away making reassuring gestures thinking that Callen wasn't looking.

\- "I..."

\- "Nell, I know that Hetty told you about Washington. You have nothing to worry about, you're not going to jail, you don't need a lawyer, and you're not going to lose your job. It's a promise."

\- "But..."

\- "But in exchange we have the biggest operation the N.C.I.S. has done in the West Coast and I can't do it without your help."

\- "Eric told me about the areas to cover and I think we can improve..."

\- "No, Nell, I have another task for you. I need you as the coordinator of coordinators."

She seemed surprised, unsure about what to say or what to do.

\- "Are you telling me that I'm not going to work with Eric?"

\- "Yes, Nell, you're not going to work with him, not this time."

\- "You are going to be here downstairs, in the area where the screens are, but you'll need to go to the headquarters of the other agencies, they have very specific orders about you. You'll have full access to the information, to the teams, and on the other side you'll be working with me directly."

\- "I don't know if..."

\- "Nell, you're the only one with the capacity of analyzing data at speed light"

\- "But Eric..."

\- "We're not talking about Eric, we're talking about you. Eric is good, the best on his field, he can find anything anywhere and he is quick. But I need someone able to analyze data, to find connections and give me just the important information. I need someone with experience on the field and, the most important I need someone who I know and trust."

Nell was serious, still she seemed to be thinking and assimilating everything Callen said; she was scared at the enormity of the task and completely unsure about her abilities.

\- "I know"- said Callen, closing his eyes and resting his head on the back of the couch – "it scares me too, and I'll understand if you don't want to do it. You can choose, Nell, but I need you."

\- "I don't know if I can do it, Callen."

\- "You maybe don't, but I'm sure. I'll send you the list of tasks and I want you to start … yesterday."

She smiled, but the smile wasn't a sincere one. She knew that Callen was trying to be nice, but in fact he just separated her from Eric. She felt like crying. Being apart from him and working in the field were the two things that she definitely didn't need right now. With the excuse of looking for her tablet, she went to ops.

Callen was exhausted and for a moment he just remained sat on the couch without moving thinking about what he had done that day. His team, his friends, his family, he had just cut the thread that keep them together and he only hoped that it was for good, because he needed them, more than ever.

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\- "Go home Mr. Callen"

\- "I can't, not finished yet."

\- "I guess you did what you told me"

\- "Yeah"

\- "And?"

\- "I pissed everyone off"

\- "I see, but you knew it anyway"

\- "Yes, I knew it"

\- "C'mon, tomorrow I'll go to Washington and we need to discuss some details. We can do it over diner and you can stay for the night. I'm not letting you to sleep in that couch again."

\- "Do you think I'm crazy, Hetty?"

\- "Do you want a sincere answer?- she cheated.

That night after diner Callen went to the library. Alfred had made his move on the chess board and it was his turn again. His cellphone biped and he felt his heart melt.

\- "U.C., u miss ur mum?"- he read.

\- "I don't remember her that much"

\- "How is life without a mum?"

\- "It sucks"

\- "Hi, hi, hi bad word"

\- "Sorry. Another secret?"

\- "Okey, dokey."

\- "U had ur mum, she loved u with all her 3, and u'll always treasure that."

He was sad, exhausted and feeling like crap. Even if he'd planned to continue to work he couldn't, so he went to his room, threw his clothes on the chair and got into the bed. The cellphone biped again:

\- "U.C. What if I forget mummy?"

\- "Impossible. I won't let u, nor dad, nor Aiden."

\- "Thanx U.C. Love u."

\- "Love u 2"


	42. Chapter 42

A.N.: I know, I know... but if you want to know also you'll have to keep reading ;) thank you!

Chapter 42

Sam was furious. Another night without sleeping, thinking about what Callen told him and trying to make sense, but definitely he couldn't understand G. What was he doing and why he was doing this to him? He needed to come back to work, to be with him, with the guys, not alone surrounded by dark clouds and feeling alone and sad. He needed action and there was a mission, the biggest mission ever and he was excluded only because of his partner, his best friend's decision.

He wasn't worried about the tests, some shooting, running and jumping with a chronometer and a chat with a psychologist. He'd been there, he knew what to do, but he had to wait at least one more week to get the status of active agent. It wasn't fair, he wanted to understand G, but his attitude wasn't normal, always busy, on the defensive, without time even to have dinner with his friends and all beaten up. The phone rang.

\- "Morning Deeks."

\- "Hi Sam. Listen, I need a favor"

\- "Why are you whispering, is something wrong?"

\- "No, it's just... Kensi is on the shower and I don't want her to know that I'm phoning you"

\- "Now you're scaring me, Deeks"

\- "No, no... ok, are you ready? Callen sent me to work with L.A.P.D. and Kensi is going with the D.E.A."

\- "What? you're kidding, right?"

\- "I wish. I'm wondering if you can talk with him and try to fix things up."

\- "Apparently I've lost my status of active agent; I'm off for another week at least."

\- "How the hell? You need to talk to Hetty..."

\- "It wasn't her, it was G. He told me his decision was irrevocable."

\- "So he got a new job in Washington and he loses it."

\- "I'll try to speak with him, but at this point I can't promise you anything."

\- "Are you coming to dinner? Pizza party, at home, all you can eat, well if you arrive before Kensi."

\- "Beer is on me"

\- "Done. See you"

\- "Bye Deeks."

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\- "Morning guys" - said Callen to the wonder twins that arrived together – "Nell I thought you had a reunion with L.A.P.D. in an hour."

\- "Yes Callen, I'll do it online and I'll save sometime to help Eric"

\- "Ok, both of you, come here.- he said standing up and surrounding his desk- "listen to me: you're not going to work together in this one, not for now, not until I need you together. Nell, screens are great, but you lose the human factor. Deeks is going to be there and I'm sure that he'll appreciate some support. So, please, go, now."

Both technicians were taken aback, and Nell went out the bullpen nearly crying.

\- "Callen..."

\- "No Eric"

\- "But..."

His cold blue stare made him to desist and he went upstairs upset. In fact he had a lot of work to do.

The day was a succession of challenges for G each one of the coordinators tried to cheat him in order to gain some autonomy. The idea of a global mission with a conjoint force wasn't going to be accepted without wrestle and he needed to show a strong hand from the beginning.

Nell's role will be fundamental for his purposes, but she needed also to fight to get hear and it wasn't the case yet. Nevertheless at the end of the day the units were ready to operate on the streets and Eric started to receive information. The pieces were set, the game was about to start.

Callen was tired. He was a man of action and passing the day on the phone trying to make people to work together wasn't one of his strengths. With Hetty in Washington for some days he knew that he'd have all the responsibility without the moral support.

It was late and Eric was about to leave.

\- "Still here Callen?"

\- "Yes, I just started my report, night is young."

\- "I'm tired I'm hope Sam didn't want to stay long." - he said without thinking, but regretting it at once at seeing Callen's surprised face.

\- "To stay long in..."

\- "It doesn't matter Eric, have fun. See you tomorrow."

\- "You can come with us if you want"

\- "Don't worry, I've things to do, but thanks anyway."

\- "Ok, see you."

Once Eric went out Callen stopped working. He couldn't help but feeling sad. He certainly could use a beer and some company, he didn't remember last time he laughed. To have friends was a privilege in life and he will have to earn it again. For now he just wanted to keep them safe.

Unable to continue one more minute in front of a screen he we went to the gym, he needed to move from the damn chair.

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At Deeks and Kensi's house the team was divided. The girls found an excuse to sit together on the couch as the boys were on the kitchen opening the pizza boxes and getting diner ready.

\- "I can't believe it" -said Kensi –"you too?"- she asked to Nell.

\- "Yes, Eric is in ops and I have to deal with the coordinators of each unit and report to him. He wants me to be a human filter."

\- "And?"

\- "Well, in fact he told me my mission in a way I should be flattered."- recalled Nell.

\- "Do you think the unit is in danger and he wants us to find another job testing other agencies?"-

\- "He assured me that everything was ok."

\- "Then it's ok."- said Kensi convinced.

\- "But it's not."

\- "We don't know."

\- "If Callen says that is ok is because it is. He never lie."

\- "The legend of undercover work never lies? c'mon Kensi!"

\- "He never lied to me!"

\- "Neither to me, but I'm worried."

\- "Yeah, me too."

The guys in the kitchen were also gossiping.

\- "So each one of us is working in a different unit."- was telling Eric.

\- "And which is his excuse to split you guys up? - asked Deeks

\- "He wants Nell to coordinate all the agencies, well to coordinate the coordinators"

\- "So now Nellysaurus is my boss, great."

\- "I don't know if she can give orders, but she would be reporting to him."

\- "She will be the most popular girl in the police station."- retorted Deeks.

\- "It makes sense, he needs to analyze a lot of data and Nell is good at that"- said Sam-"but I don't know why I'm excluded."

\- "Maybe Hetty..."- started Eric

\- "Oh no, I asked G and he said that it was his decision."

\- "At least you could talk with him, because with me he was an arrogant asshole."

\- "Guys we are talking about G! This project, mission or whatever it is seemed important to him. The quickest we finish it the quickest everything would be normal again!"- exclaimed the poor Eric who was really suffering with the situation.

\- "Do you really think that, Eric? Because to me it seems the end of the unit."- said Deeks.

Eric paled and Sam knew that he had to put some sense and stop the conversation.

\- "Ok guys, I'll talk to him. This weekend I'm going to San Francisco to see the kids. It's Aidan's birthday and I'm sure he'll come if I ask him to. I'll have all day with G and I know how to interrogate him."


	43. Chapter 43

A.N.: just remember my dear readers, the world is not always black or white, but grey ;)

Chapter 43

Next day Callen woke up in the weight bench of the gym without remembering when he had fallen asleep. He looked his cellphone, shit, nearly seven in the morning! he showered to get rid of the cold and stiffness and he went upstairs.

\- "Morning G."

\- "Sam! what are you doing here?"

\- "I thought we can have breakfast together"

\- "Sorry Sam, I'm already late, I can't go out..."

\- "All bases covered"- said Sam signaling a bag on the little table in front of the couch.

\- "In that case I'm starving, thank you!"- Callen served two coffees and sat in front of Sam.

They both opened Styrofoam boxes with scrambled eggs, bacon and toast and G started to eat like he hasn't eaten in decades.

\- "Take it easy G! what? you didn't had diner yesterday?"

\- "As a matter of fact, no"- he said without giving any importance to his commentary.

Sam felt a pinch of guilt thinking about how many pizzas they swallowed last night, but then he remembered that it was Callen's actions that lead the team to that situation.

\- "You had not come here only to invite me to breakfast"- commented Callen munching some bacon.

\- "No."

\- "If you're going to ask me to change my decision, you could have saved yourself the ride and the eggs.- he said- Even if you don't think so, it's in the regulations. "

\- "G, I know the regulations and it is discretionary to the team leader."

\- "And it was the right thing to do Sam, you've been through a lot."

\- "You don't know what I've been through."- answered Sam bitterly looking at the wall.

\- "Sam…"- Callen's heart sank. He could feel the pain and the reproach in his friend's voice and he didn't know what to do. A lump formed in his throat and suddenly the eggs weren't such a good idea.

Sam sighed and said in a more controlled voice:

\- "Aiden's birthday is on Sunday, I'm going to the Academy to spend the day with the kids and you're invited. They are willing to see you, G."

\- "Hey! Uncle Callen had never missed a birthday."

\- "More like a birthday cake, I should say."

Even if the joke came naturally, G felt that something had been broken between them and it was his fault.

\- "Thank you for the breakfast, Sam. I promise I'll be there on Sunday."- he said standing up an extending his hand.

\- "You're welcome. I'll phone you to let you know the details."- answered Sam giving a handshake. He wasn't in the mood for nothing more.

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That morning things started to move on the streets. L.A.P.D. stopped two operations apparently small but with the indistinct smell of the cartel. Just some hash and joint traffic that finished with a kick on the butt, and two unmarked pistols that never got to its destination. Deeks was pleased, it was good to be the leader for once, but he knew that for the Molina cartel, these deals were just nothing. As a cop he was aware that his unit was probably the best prepared to be in L.A. streets and he touched the pride of his men in order to increasing the number of extortions. On the other side he was pissed off. Being far away from Kensi wasn't easy, he missed her badly and he discovered himself thinking on excuses to phone her. Another thing hard on him were the stupid and artificial division of the city. It meant to stop following a suspect just because he crossed the street with the inconvenient of having to communicate with other unit to continue the chase. Stupid nonsense. He decided to talk to Nell about that.

On the other side of L.A. the unit two of the D.E.A. had received the information of a drug exchange in Park Hancock near the museum in La Brea. Carlos and Dimitri were in position with the drugs ready to act and Talia and Kensi were sat on a bench taking advantage of the good weather to tan under the sunshine. Kensi was checking her phone every two seconds making Talia to feel uncomfortable. Being accustomed to big operations she loved the fact of limiting her territory to a few blocks; that was much easier to control and increased the possibilities of success.

\- "At your 10 Kensi!"

\- "Oh yeah"

\- "They are handsome!"

\- "More than handsome."

\- "Why the bad guys look better than the good ones?

\- "The appeal of crime. Look! They are going to cross the street, not our business."- said Kensi somewhat relieved.

\- "What is wrong with you? C'mon, these guys are ours!

\- "Talia..."

But Talia was already on the move ready for some action.

\- "¡Guapos! ¿qué tal? my friend and I have a little problem that you guys can solve."

\- "¡Hola, hola chicas!"- saluted in Spanish one of the guys.

\- "What are doing here so lonely?"- Said the other one.

\- "In fact we're waiting for you."

\- "We've a business to do, we'll come back in a minute, promised!"

\- "Not anymore guys, your deal is cancelled but we've exactly what do you need."

\- "I don't think so, you can be a cop."

\- "Do I look like a cop to you, baby?"- said Kensi making advances toward the tallest guy.

\- "Tenemos coca de la buena, the good stuff for you at very special price."

\- "What? no, not here!"

\- "Ok, behind the trees there."

\- "Chicas, chicas esto no funciona así"(girls it doesn't work like that)

\- "What, do you need a sample?"- asked Talia snorting a little dose of the white powder and offering some to the guy.

\- "Honey, you're crazy"- he said and looking in both directions he tested the cocaine.

\- "Maybe, but I've the good stuff only for you, amigo."

As Talia and the guys closed the deal selling for the first time in her life two kilos of cocaine Kensi tried to worm information out of the other guy.

\- "Cariño, ahora que somos amigos, cuéntame con quién querías hacer tratos" (Honey, now that we're friends tell me with who you wanted to do business).

\- "Ya sabes, los mexicanos." (You know, the Mexican)

\- "Si amor, pero si tú me lo cuentas todo podemos hacer más negocios" (Yes, love, but if you tell me everything we can do more business)

In less than fifteen minutes everything was over and Talia and Kensi were on the car counting dirty money.

\- "That was bad"- said Kensi.

\- "Really bad. I wish I can come back there, beat them for good and read the Miranda."

\- "I hope this plan works, because I don't feel comfortable giving drugs to kids."

\- "Honey, you're not feeling comfortable, but it has nothing to do with these kids or the drugs. Troubles with Shaggy?"- she asked.

\- "No, no, the contrary in fact."

\- "I see, you pass the day petting and I'm not as good as a partner."

\- "We don't do that!"

\- "Really?"- asked Talia with a funny face.

\- "I mean, at work! You're impossible" –said Kensi laughing.

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At the end of the day Callen was working on the level of response of satellites when Nell literally telephoned and her tired face appeared on the screen in ops.

\- "Hi guys"

\- "Hello Nell, how was your day?"- asked Eric who was more than bored for another torture day with Callen over his shoulder all time.

\- "Hi Nell"- saluted Callen- "You know what?"- he asked addressing to both of them – "if you just tell me the number of operations and the sectors where they were done, I let you two alone and call it a night."

The exchange of stares didn't escape G. He knew he was being hard on everyone and he only hoped they forgive him one day. Once Nell told him everything he went downstairs and passed the information to the grid. The busiest units were concentrated in the East where L.A.P.D. was operating. He needed to know if it was because of the police experience or if it was a pattern behind, but it was still soon to know. Tired he rubbed his eyes and went to the gym. With Sam coming back presumably in one week he needed to recover the status of active agent as soon as possible, no way he let his partner alone in the field. The problem wasn't to manage the pain, that he could do it, the problem was to keep up the rhythm and the fact that anybody couldn't conceal a broken bone.


	44. Chapter 44

A.N.: Another one! thank you for reading :)

Chapter 44

The routine was soon settled and with that the problems on the following days. The number of operations increased exponentially and Callen's decisions were making everyone crazy. L.A.P.D. units were doing great, in spite of two detentions done by the guys in blue who taking advantage of the information the units had, they sent the cops after the operations were finished. On the other hand the C.I.A. wasn't really trained to deal with small operations and in their sectors G knew that the Cartel could be more annoyed.

Conscious of the extraordinary situation he tried to be patient with everyone; he multiplied the reunions and answered silly questions, trying not to impose his condition of leader. He wasn't sleeping more than four hours, he barely went out the mission and the only food he had were the protein bars that Hetty left before going to Washington. His eyes were permanently red for all the time he passed at the computer and they stung. Nevertheless he tried to dress the way Hetty liked, shaving his hair nearly as often as his beard, he didn't overdo with exercise and he even bought a vitamin complex the day he went to pick up to the armory in West Hollywood the Glock 17 that Michelle let there for Aiden. Michelle… he wasn't able even of thinking about her during the day, and at night her last day of life was his new recurrent nightmare. He was sloppy, and he couldn't allow that to happen again. The moment he sensed the importance of the operations scaled he made the units to wear cameras, GPS and intercom. These measures were usual for the N.C.I.S. but not for the rest of the agencies, in particular for L.A.P.D. that didn't like the idea of being monitored.

\- "Nell, I need unit two of the C.I.A. to move three sectors in diagonal towards Korea town."

\- "Are you sure Callen? Because if we move just one sector unit one of L.A.P.D. you can have that sector covered."

\- "I know Nell, but then unit two of the D.E.A. would have more than three sectors to cover. So make that happen, please."

\- "It won't be a popular order."

\- "I get that, but I know what I'm doing."

Nell sighed on the other side of the screen. She was tired and the day had just started. It was more than hard for her to make people listen and each reunion with the coordinators was a nightmare. Even working with Deeks was hard because nobody seemed to agree with the orders and, even if she was the only one at having all the information in hands, she couldn't make sense of what Callen was doing. He was so focused, meticulous and perfectionist that even Sam would pale at his side. That was so unlike him that Nell was worried and the poor Eric was nuts.

\- "Eric I need to know."- Asked G again.

\- "About what this time?"

\- "The real time information."

\- "Yes?"

\- "What do you understand for real time?"

\- "Exactly that, Callen. For instance the images of the cam you're seeing in the right hand side of the screen are happening right now."

\- "These are traffic cams."

\- "Yeah."

\- "But what about satellite images?"

\- "It's the same."

\- "Are you telling me that a satellite is giving you the image of an action at the same time that action is happening?"

\- "More or less."

\- "Eric…"

\- "Well, it's like a trip in the space."- said Eric using the screen as a black board-"the image travels to the satellite which send it back to your computer."- he said painting a triangle.

\- "So it's no real time, you have to know how many time it takes to go and to come back for the image then to divide it in two and to multiply it by the speed of light."- calculated G surprising Eric.

\- "Yes, that's right, there is the SLR…"

\- "The satellite laser ranging"-interrupted Callen thinking.

\- "Correct again. And it can help to measure the time in each type of satellite."

\- "What about the cameras the units have in their uniforms?"

\- "We received the signal from the satellite."

\- "And the sound is travelling at another speed, so why are you telling me that communications are in real time when, in fact, they are not?"

Callen seemed disappointed and worried, and Eric was hurt and frustrated.

\- "I need to know the gap between the image and the action according to each type of camera we use."

\- "What? Callen, I can't do that!"

\- "Why? Because you don't know how to do it or because you don't want to do it?"- challenged G who went out of ops without waiting for an answer.

Tired of struggling to get every single thing he needed. He sent a text to the only person who made him happy lately.

\- "Banana! What does the cookie say after the hunter shot her?"

\- "?"

\- "OMG I'm a donuts"

\- "Lol. U'r silly U.C."

\- ;0)

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\- "Hi Beale!"- said Kensi letting her bag at the side of her desk.

\- "Schussss!"

\- "What is the mystery?"

\- "I'm going home before he finds me!"

\- "Who?"

\- "Callen."

\- "That bad, eh?"

\- "Worse! What are you doing here?"

\- "I'm going to work out for a while before Deeks arrives home."

\- "Schussss!"

\- "All right! Go, go, see you."

Kensi was on the stairs when she heard the noise of rubber soles against the polished floor followed by a bump. She cursed internally for having let her weapon upstairs, but then the noise of rubber soles started again. Curious she hide and sticking her nose out a little bit she saw Callen doing the time circuit, one of the silly mandatory exercises to be an active agent. She could see that G was sweating and moving slowly, one feint, two and bum!, Callen stumble over the cone on the floor. He laid there, breathing hard and cursing in a language that she didn't understand, then he tried to get up, but it was like he was still out of breath. She had seen enough. Entering the room she approached Callen and asked him:

\- "Can I?" and thoughtlessly she kicked the cone with all her forces sending it to the other side of the room.

\- "Pending business?"- said Callen sat on the floor. He was pale, soaked wet and shaking slightly.

\- "Something like that"- she said extending a hand and propelling Callen up who swayed a little and couldn't help a grimace of pain -"Hey, are you ok?"

\- "I just need to sit for a sec." – he said going to the bench where he sat with the eyes closed and his arm around his torso.

\- "Here, water."

\- "Thank you."- After drinking he felt better, but he was far from being ok.

\- "The five guys in Washington did a number on you, didn't they?"

\- "Just bruises. It's still my back."

\- "Your back?"

\- "I got shot, remember?"

\- "Of course! I thought you…"

\- "Broken rib."

\- "What? Why you didn't tell me?"

\- "I told you the day I guessed you were engaged and you menaced me with another one. You knew that I'd lost the status of active agent."

\- "But I didn't…"

\- "It changes nothing, Kens. I just need to recover the status asap."

\- "You can't jump with a broken rib, Callen!" – she exclaimed, but seeing his resolute stare she sighed and add- "Well, then you're doing it wrong."

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "The way you train. For how long have you been doing the circuit?"

\- "Dunno. One hour, maybe?"

\- "Wrong again. No more than ten minutes."

\- "Oh no, you haven't seen my time, I need to do it in less than twenty seconds. I need training."

\- "You don't. You only need the choreography, the speed came after if you don't force it. Believe me, I was doing exactly the same mistake as you, and the only thing I got was a blue knee and stiffness. Look"- she said putting the cone on its place she lay down and started the circuit doing it perfectly and fast even without warming up."

\- "Is it your way of calling me useless?"

\- "It's my way of coaching you, if you want to."


	45. Chapter 45

A.N.: Changes are coming ;)

Chapter 45

\- "C'mon Nell, these meetings aren't about you telling me the coordinator's complains! Don't get me wrong, but I need you to give me useful information and lately all I have is rubbish. You know they are blocking the data, they are not collaborating!"

\- "Callen…"

\- "I know it's hard, that you're alone in the middle of imposing people with an ego bigger than this city and unwilling to cooperate. You're not here to tell me that the wire of the cam in the L.A.P.D.'s uniform is itchy, you're here to help me to analyze the data of each incursion the units do and I don't have any information from the last incursions L.A.P.D. and the C.I.A. have done."

Nell was on the verge of tears overwhelmed by the situation. One side of Callen wanted to hug her, but he knew that doing that was precisely the contrary she needed.

\- "You have to understand that you're a colonel not a soldier. If they are complaints, and I'm sure that the list is huge, they can complain to me or to the Secretary of Defense."- Callen paused for a second and added softly- "What happened to the fifteen years old girl who confronted family, teachers and system to go to the university? I expect more from you because you're better than that."

\- "Yes sir"- said Nell going out.

Callen closed his eyes for a moment feeling a piece of filth; to say that he was tired was to describe his normal state. That night Port Authority's alert woke him up before 4am when he had barely managed to sleep two hours over his desk; he was running on adrenaline and coffee since then. A charger with Panama's flag coming from Acapulco was about to dock in L.A. everything seemed legal and it wasn't the first time that same boat docked in the city, in fact it was the fourth time it did it at regular intervals. The cargo chart said industrial material, but the drug could be easily camouflaged. Lisa's advice was to let them unload without further intervention, but his gut was telling him otherwise. The cartel was moving from East to West and that cargo was just in the right place in the right moment. Unable to have the information he needed, he went to ops and looked all the cameras until he found the ship. It was a low draft cargo boat completely different from the cartel's usual mode of transportation. Nothing seemed to indicate suspect movements or drugs, but he needed to know everything about that ship. He passed the next hour reprograming a satellite, a task that probably Eric could do in seconds, but he was not going to wake him up again at six in the morning, the poor guy was working more than 10 hours per day lately.

He phoned the agencies one by one just to remember Washington orders and the necessity of collaboration. He asked explicitly full collaboration with Nell Jones and required the D.E.A. to move forward unit one to the next sector. He needed that ship controlled and to know how much cocaine the cartel was moving. He was hungry. - "Wednesday! the food truck will be outside in an hour, Eric and I deserve some decent food"- he thought.

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Nell's first instinct was to go to Eric's house. Since Port Authority's alert and Callen's call she was ready to act, but apparently she wasn't doing her job. She was feeling hurt, alone and weak. Never before in her whole life she was told that her job wasn't good and Callen just did. What was wrong with him? Why he was so bossy? What happen with his kindness and caring? Why he was blaming her? Crying she parked in front of her partner's apartment ready to curl at his side and to borrow his Spiderman pajamas, but then she looked the time displayed in the car's screen. 4.30 am. She couldn't wake Eric up just to cry on his shoulder. Something that Callen said triggered on her mind: what happened to the unafraid girl she used to be? Since Michelle's death she was feeling scared and she didn't like it at all.

At the corner she saw a 24/7 diner, she took her tablet from the car, went into the nearly empty local and asked for the biggest breakfast they had in the menu. If she was going to read the riot act to the representatives from the most important agencies in the country she will need extra energy.

Even before her second pancake she had let the messages on the voicemails. The meeting will be at the C.I.A. headquarters at 9am, no excuses.

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The melodies of Kensi and Deeks's phones sounded in unison waking them up nearly at the same time.

\- "Good morning sunshine!"

\- "Morning… I wish I could sleep more…" - murmured Kensi hugging the pillow.

\- "You arrived late yesterday"- commented Deeks kissing her and getting up.

\- "Yeah, I'm training with Callen."

\- "What? You're doing what?"

\- "It's not a big deal, he needs to recover the status of active agent and I'm helping him"

\- "Why? After what he did? He split us for God's sake! He is being a completely idiot lately!"

\- "He is my friend, Deeks, he was always there for me when I needed him and it is the right thing to do."

\- "And Sam? Was he there for Sam and for all of us? C'mon Kens!"

\- "Deeks! I'm not going to start the day quarreling with you! We are talking about Callen, and for your information he put you on the L.A.P.D. because he trusts you and he needs someone to trust in there!"

\- "I'm not buying it. He threw me to the lions! I'm like a gladiator fighting the lions with one hand and the rest of the gladiators with the other one and it scares the hell out of me!"

\- "And do you think that's funny not to have you in the field? Do you think that I'm not afraid? But this is work and that are orders. I've to go. Surveillance mission. Cargo ship."

\- "Funnier than a coordinator's meeting."

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When Eric arrived to ops he saw Callen playing with his toys.

\- "Wow, wow, wow that means that I have to go in the field while you work with the big screen?"

\- "Hi Eric, sorry. I needed some information and I reprogramed the S1Q25 to…"

\- "You what?!"- Eric took the tablet and checked the program and the satellite information.

\- "I'm sorry if I messed up but it seems to work and I need…"

\- "You did this?"- he asked with a funny face.

\- "Eric, please, tell me that the satellite is not falling down of something like that!"

\- "Well in fact your code works, I wouldn't have done the same way, but it works. Where did you learn, Callen?"

\- "I've passed last days watching you, what do you expect?"- he asked confounded – "you can close your mouth biting that donuts, Hetty is not here, so enjoy the breakfast and when you finish I need the identification of every single person near that boat."

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Talia knocked on Kensi's car window and installed herself inside once she open the safe.

\- "So what do you think? We've been here for hours and still nothing."

\- "Well, if they are drugs in that ship we're about to find out."- Said Talia signaling with her head a boy with his puppy.

\- "How…"

\- "Meet agent Sully and agent Flurry. I know, he looks too young for being an agent, but he is cute and above legal age."

\- "Talia!"

\- "Flurry on the other side is one of the best canine agents we have. If someone in that cargo has smoked a joint the day before yesterday he'll let us know."

Kensi followed with the camera the movements of the agent as she activated the signal for Eric who watched, next to an impatient Callen, how Sully freed the dog who run happy to the boat's ramp and jumped inside. They didn't have to wait for the reactions. Three occupants of the boat started to run on the deck behind the dog who seemed possessed. Agent Sully cried crazily from the boardwalk and some minutes after finally one of the men trapped unceremoniously the poor Flurry and gave him back to the agent.

The price of knowing for sure that the boat didn't have drugs was a dog's cookie and a scratch behind the ears.

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Downstairs at the bullpen Callen passed the next hours working on the grid and the positions of the units. Something was missing on the big picture, and he couldn't grab it. Every single movement led to that damn cargo ship and a big contraband operation, and he was willing to risk his life to prove it.


	46. Chapter 46

A.N.: Sorry for the break guys, it's hard life without wifi! I hope you'll enjoy.

Chapter 46

With the first light of the morning information started to flow in the screens. The details of the last operations were finally arriving thousands of data, images, and reports from the units. After a night with Sargent Ben on the streets, G was already showered, but the hot water didn't take away nor the stiffness of his back, nor the spider web the nightmares had left on his head. He was pouring the tea on his mug when Nell arrived like a hurricane.

\- "Callen I need to speak to you" – she said bossy.

\- "If you're going to complain about something the mountain is there; - he said signaling a stack on his desk- I'm kind of busy right now."

\- "No, you're not. You're blocked and I may have some information to move forward."

\- "Huuu now the Nell I used to know is talking, what do you got?"- Callen's eyes brightened.

\- "I've all the incursions done by each one of the agencies since we started the operation against the cartel. I've created a program that allows classifying and sorting each data of the mission.

\- "Do you mean that you have created a database? Oh! Nell it's exactly what I was trying to do since the beginning!"

They started to work crossing the data and soon Nell confirmed the pattern Callen could only suspect.

\- "So, they are indeed moving to the west"- said Nell surprised.

\- "No, Nell, it's better than that, we are pushing them to the west and they are trying to stop us and strike back, they are playing!"

\- "Playing? What do you mean?"

\- "I mean that we have a choice to stop them and this choice starts with that boat in the next hours."

\- "But I told you, it's confirmed, there aren't drugs on that ship."

\- "I'm still missing something on the picture… please, Nell, go with Eric, I need you to cross the GPS positions of each one of the units' main operations against the cartel, the ones we have confirmed, with the kind of contraband, drugs or weapons. Send it to this screen when ready. Then move unit two C.I.A one sector to the north, please. Prevent Port Authority that we're going to intervene in the port and elevate the alert to level one."

\- "On it"- A Nell full of confidence and all business ran upstairs proud to help and more than happy to work with Eric.

A crazy idea came to Callen's mind, but he needed confirmation. The buzzing of his phone took him off his reveries.

\- "Hetty!"

\- "Good morning Mr. Callen. How are you, my dear?"

\- "Alive."

\- "I see."

\- "But you knew that, you're my next of kin."

\- "Alive and as cheeky as always, I'm afraid."

\- "They must have put a serious pressure for you to call"

\- "You're aware of the situation, they want results and they want them now. If you have something to share I'll appreciate it, my next resource is to dance La Macarena."

G chuckled remembering Hetty last time at the karaoke. It seemed another life.

\- "And what happen with the three months?"

\- "Well, if I can get you three weeks you can consider it a victory."

\- "That bad eh? I've nothing specific yet, but I feel that very soon I can give you some good news."

\- "That's an optimistic way of saying that you have nothing but your gut."

\- "Wasn't "Trust your instincts" your motto?"

\- "Lately I changed it for "Save your butt" and I heartily recommend you to do the same Mr. Callen."

\- "Have a good day Hetty"

Great. To the mountain of work he had to add the pressure of saving everybody's butt in record time. The phone rang again:

\- "You forget something, Hetty?"

\- "Hi G."

\- "Sam!"

\- "Are you ready?"

\- "Ready for what?"

\- "Aiden's birthday, remember?"

\- "Yeah, on Sunday, of course."

\- "I've our tickets, we're leaving tomorrow at 4 pm"

\- "What? Wait Sam, I can't! I'm in the middle of something huge!"

\- "G, you promised!"

The data Callen had asked for appeared on the screen, he hadn't had time for this conversation.

\- "I promised to be there on Sunday, yeah, and I'll be there, but not tomorrow!"

\- "I thought you wanted to catch up and to spend some time with the kids and ..."

\- "And I'm willing to Sam, believe me, I'll do everything in my power to be there for the birthday"

\- "Yeah, right."

Callen's phone vibrated again, it was Kensi.

\- "Sam, listen, I'm sorry I've to go. Talk to you later."

\- "G… " – said Sam, but the communication was over.

\- "Kens, I hope this is important."

\- "They are preparing the unloading, Callen, but according to the experts here, no drugs, everything seems legal."

\- "Nell will send you the details, but hey Kens… be ready for some action."

Out of the corner of his eye he saw it on the screen. How he could have been so stupid! Running he went to ops.

\- "Eric, Nell, tell me that you're seeing the same as me!"

\- "What do you mean, G?"-asked Eric.

\- "Put the data Nell just sent me" – The satellite image of the city appeared on the big screen and little by little the GPS dots signaling the place of the interventions of the units. –"Don't you see it?

\- "I can see nearly two parallel lines if we link the dots"- said Nell.

\- "Can you put in blue the interventions with weapons and in red the interventions with drugs?" – the dots in the screen changed its color.- "Ok, can you link now the dots, Eric, please? Good, and now can you add the boat's GPS?"

\- "OMG!"- exclaimed Nell – "They were trafficking in parallel importing and exporting drugs and weapons under our noses in so small operations that the big agencies never got the information!"

\- "Holy guacamole! That means that the ship…"- started Eric.

\- "…is transporting weapons and no drugs."- completed Callen. – "Nell give the go to intercept the merchandise, this time we need to do it right, following the law, but pass the message, all the agents must cover their faces and the identification as law forces must be done in the last minute. We need the guys on that ship alive and talking. Eric, please, verify with each unit the perimeter of their area, even if this is a joint operation the rules don't change, they can't jump from one area to another, it's the only way to know where everybody is and to send the right person in the right moment to the right spot."

The screen illuminated suddenly with the images of the street cameras near the ship. The traffic in the adjoin streets were even worse than usual.

\- "An accident with no victims. Apparently a truck transporting oil had a leak and the cars behind were sliding on the asphalt."-informed Nell.

\- "Damnit. Eric which is the shortest way to get there?"

\- "Callen, you're not going to…"

\- "I need to be there, Eric! If there're detentions I need to know who. The cartel is not going to leave this operation in inexperience hands."

\- "Go through the airport and then South for Sepulveda."

Just when G was about to go Nell stopped him:

\- "Callen! You'll need this" – she handled him an earpiece.

G couldn't help an involuntary gesture touching his left ear. Then he nodded, put the earpiece into his right one, and mimicking the military salute with two fingers he said before running outside:

\- "Colonel"

\- "General" – murmured Nell.


	47. Chapter 47

A.N.: Thank you guys for being there. Hey "Guest"what a responsibility! I'm really flattered, thank you! I hope you can sleep after this one!

Chapter 47

G was about to leave the building when he realized that he didn't have the right of going to the field. His presence if he intervened could compromise the operation if a lawyer found out, and the Molina cartel had the best ones, so he left his identification and weapon secured on his locker and took the only thing able to open doors in this world: money. After nearly forty five minutes driving G was stocked into the traffic jam.

\- "Eric, Nell, an update!"

\- "They have started to unload the boxes to four trucks. All units are in position."

\- "Ok, let's them finish, if we show our cards now the cartel will blow up the boat even with his own people inside. But don't let the trucks leave the port. Is L.A.P.D. informed? We need to cover all the exits."

\- "On it!"

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Deeks and his unit were ready to act, but they didn't know against who or when. The only order was not to move from their sector, even if they were four blocks away from the port. His men started to ask questions, again, and the only answer he had for them is that orders were orders. As always, it would be the C.I.A. taking all the credit for L.A.P.D. job, and the situation infuriated the teams.

He knew that Kensi was on the other side of the street, if the trucks tried to run away the logic way to do it was through her sector. He texted her:

\- "Have you seen the handsome guy on the other side of the street, Kensilina?"

\- "Not now" – she answered.

Talia was positioning the boys one block away when she saw Kensi again with the phone. Touching her earpiece she cried:

\- "Look girl, I don't know if the N.C.I.S. pays you for playing with the phone, but now you're on my team waiting for the "go" to intervene. If you're not ready you better go, and I mean it."

\- "Sorry. I'm ready." – Kensi turned her phone off and cursed Deeks.

The black sweater she was wearing was ample enough to hide the weapons and she remarked that she was touching the safe of her gun in a nervous tic. She was anxious and for one second she considered to retire, maybe she could just to cross the street and back up Deeks' unit. The moment she thought it she knew that fear was wining so she took a deep breath and waited for the next order.

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Unable to advance anymore due to the traffic Callen parked and went out the car. He was merely twelve blocks away when Eric gave the alert confirmed by the units near to the boat.

\- "Go, go, go!"- Shouted Callen as he accelerated his pace – "Talk to me Eric!"

\- "Murphy's unit is controlling the first truck; they're two occupants, merchandise and suspects secured. C.I.A. unit one is taking control of the second truck, but they are resisting!"

Damnit he needed to be there! Then he saw the solution. He took five yards off his wallet and went directly to a young guy who was about to start the engine of his old cross motorcycle, a light 50cc with great suspension and the fenders full of dirt.

\- "Hello! I'll buy your bike. Thank you!"

Before the guy could react, Callen had put the money on his pocket and was already on the motorcycle turning the key in the ignition.

\- "A "Grant" for the helmet. Good deal. See you!"

The white helmet was too big for him and he tried to adjust the strap to the top as he rode. With the motorcycle he arrived to the limit of the sectors in no time and taking advantage of the slope on the street he stopped just to appraise of the situation.

\- "Truck three on the run, I repeat, truck three on the run."- said Eric

\- "Nell! Prevent Talia they are going her way!"- shouted Callen -"Eric where is the other truck? C'mon! there's only a way out!"

\- "Controlled Callen! N.C.I.S. got it! but there're shooters on the run. I see two men going south!"

Then G saw what Eric was saying first hand. Few blocks away people were running and screaming. It only could mean trouble.

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Without moving one inch Talia shot several times to the tires of the truck that approached at full speed. Kensi was covering her from her position, ready for a big explosion that didn't come. The truck stopped sharply and, all of a sudden, five men went out shooting. Without thinking it twice Kensi shot dead two of them and followed another two who tried to flee. Talia without bullets after shooting the truck, started to fight with three of the suspects, but in no time the guys of her team were there to help her to control the situation and to secure the truck and the weapons.

From the other side of the main street Deeks saw the truck stopping and the men on the run in the sector covered by the D.E.A. He and his men were doing nothing while the action was merely some blocks away. He needed to know. He phoned Kensi just to check her phone was dead. He run another block to the north and saw her, at the other side of the street fighting two men only with her knife and her bare hands. That was more he could stand so he gave the order and he ran with his men to support Kensi.

His heart was beating so fast that he thought that he could die from a stroke before arriving.

\- "Please, Kens, fight, fight, fight, I'm coming!"

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Callen stopped for a second and saw the shooters Eric was talking about. Two men, dressed in suits, they could easily camouflage and run away. Ok, they were in Deeks' sector now. Where the hell was the unit? The four blinkers of a parked grey Ford turned on and off, and the doors were unlocked, they were going to flee!

\- "Eric, Nell! Where's Deeks!?"

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When the first man kicked her gun away from her hands Kensi nearly panic, but then the familiar feeling of the adrenaline rush took over. Automatically she found the knife on her pocket and menaced the men. They were young, she could tell, and probably without any experience in fights with a knife because the moment one of them made the attempt of touching her she cut him on his neck and pushed him away. The other man turned around. Four men dressed in black sweaters were cutting his retreat so he attacked, but Kensi was ready. With a fluid movement she feinted and stabbed him on his shoulder. She was putting him the handcuffs when Deeks hugged her.

\- "Deeks! What are you doing here?"

\- "I saw you fighting alone and I came to have your back!"

\- "They were only two, Deeks, and I had a knife!"- exclaimed Kensi upset making laugh the police fellows.- "You have to come back to your sector!"

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The moment the shooters were about to reach the car Callen knew he had to act and fast. He turned the motorcycle facing the traffic in the one-way street and ran on the border of the pavement dodging people and avoiding obstacles. One of the fugitives was opening the passenger's door and the other one was doing the same on the opposite side. The driver saw him coming; gun on the ready he tried to shoot, but Callen was already there. With the motorcycle at its maximal power he jumped forward and pushed with the front wheel the car's door catching the man, who screamed like a pig, between the car's frame and the metallic door; the motorcycle landed hard making G lose his balance and nearly fall, but he recovered just in time to avoid the bullets that the first guy was shooting from the other side of the Ford. Turning as fast as he could and covering himself with the car as the bullets continued to fly, he kicked the driver on the head before he could take his weapon, letting him unconscious. The motorcycle jumped again.

Suddenly the man on the passenger's door seeing that the car wasn't going to provide him a way of escape loaded his weapon while Callen tried to control the motorcycle. G looked at him on the face for the first time and what he saw made his heart skip a beat.

\- "Eric, is Mario Alberto Suárez, the man in the Ford, I repeat I have eyes on Mario Alberto Suárez! We need him alive! Nobody shoot him!" - cried Callen at the same time he threw the motorcycle towards him with the bad luck that the motorcycle stopped making the vehicle jump one more time. His side hurt like hell.


	48. Chapter 48

A.N.: Happy and spooky Halloween!

Chapter 48

\- "Deeks!"- shouted Nell- "on your sector! the two fugitives are about to enter in a parked grey Ford at Gaffrey St between the 15th and the 14th "

\- "Damn!"- he called his men and ran again to the address five blocks away from his position.

\- "Deeks! unit two, don't shoot the suspects, bring them alive!"

\- "Copy that Nell" –said Deeks and then to his men: - "No shooting guys, we need them in good shape!"

\- Shit, c'mon, run, run, run! - asked Deeks to his men as he saw the men reaching the car.

The cartel members were going to flee just in front of them. The traffic was impossible, the crossroad was blocked by vehicles trying to move and it was difficult to advance between them. Then Deeks' lucky star shined, a guy in a motorcycle pushed the door against the driver. Ouch! at first he thought that it was a providential traffic accident, but the guy dribbled controlling the motorcycle and came back to the car clearly trying to prevent the driver from getting behind the wheel; they were shooting at him! damn! this was not casual.

Eric was crying as crazy on the earpiece, it was difficult for Deeks to make sense- "Mario what? Oh gosh! One of the bad guys was apparently a big fish. The same big fish that started to run away from the car on the pavement in zig zag. The man was armed and he moved his gun around threatening people who reacted lying on the ground or running around; Deeks was getting closer, nevertheless the terrible traffic made difficult to cross the street; he indicated his team through signs to go around the car; the man next to the driver's door was unconscious and soon a team member secured him. Deeks continued to run behind the other one, but it was impossible to shoot, too many civilians and they hadn't uniforms to let people know they were cops. Then the suspect pushed a woman who fell hard on the floor, he picked something from her. Oh no! he took her baby as a hostage and he was running!

Deeks was cutting distance, but he was still in disadvantage, his team mates were behind him so if the man flew that was entirely on him. The stupid order of remaining in the sector suddenly didn't seem so stupid. All his daily training was making the difference and when the suspect turned at the left hand side corner to the perpendicular street, he knew that he was nearly there. He heard more bullets; oh no, no, no, no, when Deeks arrived to the corner saw the man had shot a person in order to steal her car. He cried identifying himself:

\- "L.A.P.D.! freeze!"

But the guy had no intention of stopping. Just when Deeks was five meters behind him the man turned and threw the baby in the air. In that moment Deeks knew the suspect had won. With all his energy he jumped forward to catch the boy who was about to hit the ground. Two of the unit team members reached the corner at that moment, in time to see how Mario Alberto Suárez pushed the wounded man from the car in order to open the door. From nowhere, at the same time Deeks succeeded at catching the baby in the air, a motorcycle burst into, and, in a dangerous balance riding on the back wheel, jumped to the car smashing the front wheel against the windshield, that exploded in thousands of glasses. With the front wheel blocked the biker turned moving the back of the motorcycle against the suspect who fell down. Then, with a supreme effort he pulled the front wheel free from the car and jumping on the roof made the motorcycle descend for the back in one clean movement and once in the ground he accelerated to go away down the road.

With his last bullet Mario Alberto Suárez shot at the guy in the motorcycle just at the same time two policemen in black sweaters jumped over him. He knew his ride was over, he only hoped the biker's one too.

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The moment G felt the impact of the bullet on the back wheel he knew he was about to lose the control of the motorcycle and he prepared himself for the fall, so when he finally he hit the ground the collision wasn't unattended, nevertheless he felt his right knee explode as he managed to turn on his back. The speed made him to slide hard on the asphalt across the road, his shirt did nothing to protect him from the abrasion, the scarce seconds of the slipping seemed eternal, and G's eyes filled with tears and he couldn't help crying at the sharp pain of the asphalt opening the still tender tissue of the burn on his shoulder. His course was abruptly stopped by the crash of the helmet into the edge of the pavement on the other side of the road, where he laid motionless completely shocked, dizzy and out of breath.

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Deeks saw the action like in a slow motion movie: the jump, the baby in his arms, crying, the suspect shooting the motorcycle, the rider who fell and slipped across the street and laid on the asphalt without moving, the cars that passed hiding him from his view, the voices of the police identifying themselves as they handcuffed the suspect who surrender, the cries of the people and the sirens of police cars, everything seemed distant, alien. For a moment he felt lost waiting for someone who tell him what to do, and the realization that the others were waiting for him to react and to take the lead hit him hard. Little by little the blurry slow movie became a speedy reality. The mother of the baby, crying at his side reclaiming her son, the team mates asking for orders, Nell on the earpiece sending reinforcements and the guy of the motorcycle... missing. He gave the baby to her mother, verified that the suspects were secured, told Nell the current situation and ran across the street stopping the traffic. The motorcycle was dented near the pavement, one of the wheels still spinning, with some effort he dragged the machine out of the road and turned to help the guy. Some meters behind he found the helmet, but not a trace of his owner.

"Eric, have you seen everything? I need you to locate the rider of the motorcycle!"

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In spite of the adrenaline, it took G ages to get to a motel room in Venice and when he finally arrived to the miserable pigpen, he collapsed on the floor bleeding from his newly open wound on the eyebrow and concerned by how sticky and soaked his shirt was becoming. An urban bus going to Santa Monica that miraculously passed at the moment of the crash served him as a gateway of the scene. His presence could compromise the operation that otherwise was a great success, so he knew he needed to disappear as soon as possible from there. The good news was that he can move his knee and in spite of the pain he was able to put some weigh on it, the bad news were the excruciating pain on his raw shoulder and the dizziness he felt. He barely managed to text Nell some instructions about the interrogations: a conjoint task force, isolation and terrorist treatment for all the prisoners. No information leaks to Washington, just a discreet message to Hetty. On the verge of a vertigo attack he saw a text from Anna asking him to meet. The only thing he could do was sending her his coordinates before the darkness claimed him.


	49. Chapter 49

A.N.: Thank you very much for the nice comments, you keep me writing and it's not easy with this complicated story. Ready for a sad chapter?

Chapter 49

A knock on the door, other, another one… the noise made the black turn grey and G's hazy world registered a scratch at the locker some quick steps and a familiar voice:

\- "Callen, Callen! Oh God! Callen!"- Anna knelt at his side alarmed at the sight of his prone body on the floor; she touched him on the back and her hand came back wet with blood.

\- "…mmm…"- a sudden wave of pain washed over G making him gasp involuntarily.

\- "What the hell happened to you?- she asked turning the light on and seeing for the first time Callen's back. –"Oh my…"

\- "Chasing a suspect… I… had some troubles…"

\- "Ok, I need to get you to a hospital, before this got infected."

\- "No… no hospitals, I can't… please, Anna!"

\- "A bullet? You get shot?"

\- "No, no… mostly scratches… If I go… bye, bye operation…"

\- "This is insane! Scratches! Callen … gosh … your shoulder and the eyebrow again! Anything else?"- she sighed exasperated.

\- "I hit my knee…I can't clean the wound alone… please…"- his voice was weaker and Anna knew she needed to act quickly.

\- "Alright, let's get you out of the floor"- she leaned over and helped him to sit on the bed.

The parlor of G's face contrasted with the dark red traces of dried blood from his eyebrow, his skin was getting clammy and his breathing superficial.

\- "I've a first aid kit on my car and I need to get something from the pharmacy. I'll be back in a minute. Don't sleep, do you hear me?"

When, true to her word, Anna came back in no time carrying two big bags a flashlight and a bucket with ice, she found that G had took his shirt off but some of the fabric was embedded with rests of asphalt and dirt into the open burn. The pain was excruciating but as the shock was winning the battle G felt like floating. In a record time Anna prepared gauzes, saline, tweezers, antibiotic ointment and gloves.

\- "Ready. But first take the jeans off and lay on the bed."

\- "Are you coming on to me, Miss Kolcheck?"- tried to joke Callen unable to disguise his hands' shake when he took the belt off.

\- "This is not funny! I text you to have diner, you sent me a GPS and silly of me all the way here I was thinking on a chili hot dog at Jody Maroni's Sausage Kingdom."

\- "Sorry…"-that's all his level of energy allowed him to say.

Anna put some ice in a towel and wrapped it around G's knee. Then she helped him to lay on his stomach and covered him a blanket waist down, she hang the flashlight, she tied her hair in a ponytail , she washed her hands thoroughly on the sink and put a pair of sterile gloves.

\- "Alright, no matter what, this will hurt."- she said as she poured the saline directly into the wound and with the help of the scalpel and the tweezers she started to extract the dirt and the remains of the shirt from the injury. Most of the scratches that covered his back from shoulder to elbow were superficial, but the wound were the burn from the explosion had been was deep, probably candidate for a graft if it wasn't treated properly.

G bit the pillow and grabbed the iron bar of the headboard of the small single bed until his knuckles became white. The floating sensation vanished with the first sharp pinch and after that all he could feel was pain.

Anna tried to concentrate on the task without overthinking. She hated to make G suffer and she could tell he was trying to remain conscious with everything he had. When she finally finished cleaning Callen's injuries he was shaking and his teeth chattering for the shock. The situation made her furious, but when G reached for her hand she only could interlace her fingers with his and laid at his side to give him some warmth.

The night was hard for G. Shock gave way to fever, fever to nightmares and nightmares to irrational fear. At first Anna tried to hug him, but that only made things worse, soon the only thing she could do was seeing him suffer and that was more than she could bear. With dawn G's fever broke and he seemed to fall in a restful sleep, nevertheless Anna felt completely lost and she hated that feeling.

When G opened his eyes first thing he saw was Anna sitting legs crossed on the dirty carpet. He knew immediately that something was wrong and that it was his fault, as always.

\- "How do you feel?"- she asked.

\- "Better, thank you." – in fact he was still weak and shaky –"I just need a shower."

\- "You need more than that."- she sighed- "Don't wet your shoulder."

The subsequent change of bandages was painful nothing to do with last day nightmare though. They didn't talk much through the early breakfast, but when Anna drove Callen to the place where he parked his car last day they both spoke at the same time:

\- "Hey Anna…"

\- "I …" –she started to say- "Ok, you first."

\- "I just want to thank you" – he said kind of timid suddenly –"I know that this isn't easy for you…"

\- "No, it isn't. Following you to gross motel rooms, seeing you suffer like that, not knowing what to do…"

\- "I'm sorry"

\- "Yeah, this is the only thing you say lately. You are doing everything wrong and you think that you can fix it saying that you're sorry."

\- "What do you want me to say, then?"

Anna laughed nervously, a treacherous tear escaping from the corner of her eye.

\- "Nothing Grisha, I don't want you to say anything you don't feel. You being broken, I can deal with; you being crazy not anymore."

\- "Then this is the end, I guess."- he said deeply hurt and more than sad, but resolute- "I'm sorry for not being enough for you, I'm only hope there are not hard feelings, because I wish you all the best and all the happiness you deserve."- he opened the car's door – "Thank you. For everything."- he added in a tiny voice going out.

Anna passed the afternoon killing virtual zombies with her console, crying and eating chocolate.

Something broke inside G. All this time he thought he was doing the correct thing, he was trying so hard to look after the people he loved, but nobody seemed to understand or by no means to appreciate that. First Joelle, now Anna, his bold little Russian. Both of them where right; he had no right to condemn nobody to his life of risks, hurt and nightmares. That time he thought he could do it, he had a house, friends, even a family, he was doing what they told him it was normal, what he was supposed to do, but he screwed it up, again, and this time he didn't have more furniture to burn.

By the time he arrived to the mission G had locked his feelings deep inside and threw the key away. He didn't know why he was feeling like a victim if he was the one hurting others. Anna was right, maybe he was just crazy.


	50. Chapter 50

A.N.: I told you, it's not an easy situation. I hope you bear with me and continue this journey, I can't believe this is chapter 50! Thank you so much for being there, I really can use your feedback!

Chapter 50

\- "What are you doing still here?"- asked Kensi. When she noticed that Deeks hadn't go to bed even if he had said that he was about to do it, she took a plaid and went downstairs finding him still glued to his computer.

\- "I've just finished my report."

\- "C'mon, you can do it tomorrow; it has been a hell of a day."

\- "Yeah…"

\- "Something is eating you, isn't it?"

\- "I don't know Kensi, it's nothing and it's everything" – he hid his face behind his hands and Kensi approached. She pressed the key enter sending the e-mail with the report, closed the lid of the computer and started to massage Deeks' head and shoulders.

\- "Hummm… that's good!"

\- "Today, we did it. We got all the bad guys. Fifteen arrests, one death – guilty of charge- and only a wounded civilian. You must be proud."

\- "I'm not. I screwed it up."

\- "Don't be so hard on you! You saved that baby, you arrested the main suspect and you lead you unit! If you're not, I'm very proud of you."- she said kissing him.

With a smooth movement Deeks took her arm and got to sit her on his lap. She laughed. Oh God, he loved her laughter. He hugged her thanking the universe for the gift of having her. Kensi looked at his blue eyes and, as always she seemed to understand. She kissed him on the forehead, on the eyelids, on the cheek, on the nose, Deeks did nothing until their mouths found each other and they kissed; gently at first, avidly later, their bodies looking for more.

The sun was waking up in the horizon when they got to bed, but Deeks couldn't take out of his mind the guy on the motorcycle.

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The bull pen was empty and that suited perfectly G who wasn't in the mood for pretending that he was feeling good. He put some ice on his knee, prepared himself a tea, took two ibuprofens in a feeble attempt of mitigating the constant dull pain and started to see the videos of the first interrogations' records.

The team coordinators had summited their reports to the cloud he shared with Nell, an euphoric feeling exudated from all of them, but Deeks'. G didn't like what he read between the lines; he needed him back on the game the sooner the better, so he took the report and erased all the references to the mysterious motorcycle giving Deeks the credit for the last detentions.

If he wanted to be the next day in San Francisco he barely had two more hours, so he went to the locker room, took the ice off his knee, changed his jeans and shaved trying not to be appalled by the image the mirror reflected. Then, carefully, he retired the gauze Anna put that morning on his shoulder and looked at the wound. It was not his first burn, but definitely it was the winner of the title to worst he never had. The task of putting the antibiotic ointment, a patch to keep the zone humid and a bandage was not only difficult to perform with his left hand and the help or the mirror, but very painful. He managed to dry the cold sweat with a towel and to put a shirt on, before realizing that he needed to rest for a minute. He barely managed to get to the boat shed where he laid on the couch. The minute became hours and G woke up startled and confused on Sunday morning.

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Sam was more than angry. Rage was an emotion which he can manage and at this moment that's exactly what he was feeling flowed on his veins against his best friend:

"Again, he did it again. He broke the team apart, he took my status away, he excluded me of the operations. He pissed me off even when I offered him breakfast as a pipe of peace, he promised me to be there and he disappeared, he didn't answer the phone, and now he refuses to be there for my kids, again! Sam thoughts were dark, since Michelle's death Callen seemed distant and cold, why?" He definitely didn't want to go there, but his attitude was more than suspicious. One thing was clear: he wouldn't allow him to ruin the weekend he was going to spend with his family.

\- "Daaaaaaaad!"- Kam jumped into his arms. Since she started the classes she was formal and paused, but sometimes her childish side fought to get out and her spontaneity won the battle, making Sam the happiest man on Earth.

\- "Why do you have to do that in front of everyone, silly?"- murmured Aiden.

\- "Hi kiddo! Cadet!"- saluted Sam.

\- "Where's Uncle Callen? You said you'll come together!"- asked Kam who didn't understand her dad's sudden change of humor.

\- "Don't worry about Callen, I'm here and we're going to spend a great weekend together."

\- "Dad, as a matter of fact I don't want to get out of the Academy"- said Aiden.

\- "Why? I've reserved a hotel with views at the Bay and on Sunday we're going to that little diner you like, Aiden."

\- "Yeeeeees!" -jumped the girl, her enthusiasm contrasted with the serious attitude of her brother and the sadness of his father.

The weekend that Sam had planned meticulously was a disaster. The visit to Alcatraz, the soup on the bread, the excursion to Sausalito, the pictures with the section of the bridge cable at the Golden Gate Park, Aiden did everything but his lack of enthusiasm worried his father who couldn't find a moment to talk to his son in private until lunch time on Sunday when Kamran went to the toilet.

\- "Are you going to tell me what's going on or do you want me to go knowing that my son had the worst anniversary day of his life?"- asked Sam

\- "I… I don't know dad, I am not in the mood, that's all. This is not magic, you know? I just can't be happy, smiling and taking silly pictures because you want to."

\- "I know it is hard, son, but you have to try, do it for your sister."

\- "If I'm behaving is for her and for you, but I rather be alone or with my friends at the school."

Sam was about to reply when Kam arrived with the four old waitresses bringing a chocolate cake with an awful pink candle and started to sing "Happy birthday to you" completely off pitch. Aiden wanted to vanish and Sam laughed out loud at the comical situation.

\- "This is good"- said Kam wiped the plate clean for the second time –"Can I have more? Please?

\- "No, no, no it's my birthday I'm finishing it! this is the best cake ever!"-said Aiden who had already eaten the other half.

\- "Yeah, not like mummy's cake"

The three of them laughed remembering past birthdays with Michelle's terrible and sticky cakes.

\- "The only one able to eat the cake was uncle Callen."- pointed Aiden out.

\- "And mum always gave him the rest to take away. Do you think he ate it, dad?"

\- "Eh? C'mon guys, the moment you finish I drive you back to the school, I don't want to lose my flight."


	51. Chapter 51

A.N.: Thank you for let me know your opinion! sometimes I think that I'm boring you. Anyway, I hope you love this one. I do.

Chapter 51

At first it seemed the right thing to do to keep his promise, but the trip on the Greyhound bus was longer than Callen believed, painful and tedious and the nearly 400 miles on the I-5 seemed to be the double without company. G missed Sam much more than he knew his friend missed him, lately their brotherhood was put to the test and he didn't know what else to do to deserve Sam's friendship again. His back and shoulder hurt to the point that he thought that the plane alternative wasn't so bad after all, but he needed to do this not only for Michelle, but for Aiden. First thing he did once at Folsom St. was to call Sam, he knew it was late, he just hoped to arrive on time to meet the family. When he didn't get an answer he went directly to Enterprise in order to rent a car.

G arrived at the academy just one hour before the school closed, exhausted, hurting all over although happy with his decision. It was his lucky day because walking away from the parking he saw Kamran with a shorter girl.

\- "Hanna Banana!"- he called.

\- "Uncle Calleeeeen!" – she ran to him and threw herself in his arms –"you came!"

\- "Is this your uncle, Hanna?"- asked a girl with pony tails.

\- "Yes"- she said proudly- "My dad's brother.

The girl looked at G's blue eyes incredulously.

\- "I'm adopted"- said Callen seriously making Kam chuckle.

\- "I'll wait for you on the game's room, don't be late for the film!"- Kam and G saw her ran to the main building as they installed in a bench in the garden.

\- "Uncle Callen, you tell me you were better, but you don't look better! Are you hurt?"

\- "I fell down from a motorcycle, and I hurt myself, nothing serious, bunny. So game's room, film… it sounds great!"

\- "I guess."

\- "But you've been crying."

\- "Dad just gone."

\- "And? Do you miss him? Already, really?"- he made a funny face making Kam smile again.

\- "No, well, yes. Well I mean it's …"

\- "What, little monkey?"

\- "I just remembered last time I saw mum. I didn't know that it was the last time I was going to see her."

\- "I see."

Both looked at the sunset, the beautiful pink, orange and blue sky in contrast with the green of the grass that was getting darker.

\- "Do you remember the last thing you said to your mum?"- asked G in a soft tone.

\- "Yes, mum and dad went with me to the bus stop, mum said "I love you" and I said "I love you too"."

\- "Imagine for a moment that you could talk to your mum once more, what would you said to her?"

\- "I love you"- she asked quickly without hesitation.

\- "Well, you did it. You did it and she knew." – he put an arm around her shoulders and she leaned her head on him for a minute.

\- "You're right"- she finally said with serenity.

\- "I'm always right!"- said G

\- "You're not. Ha, ha, ha"

\- "Who says that?

\- "Dad."

\- "He is right."

They both laugh.

\- "So, where is the birthday boy?"

\- "He must be at the running track. He volunteered to sweep the leafs. In his birthday, can you believe it!" – she rolled her eyes comically-"Right there!"- she signaled.

\- "Ok, thanks. Now go inside, you're going to miss the film!"

\- "Yeah, sure." – she seemed oddly quiet and reluctantly to leave, then suddenly she hugged Callen who hugged her back and said:

\- "I love you!"

\- "I love you too."

And she ran looking once back to wave goodbye the same path her friend did some minutes ago. The sunset was stunning, the light wind made the flag flap and the noise of the fabric against the post was mesmerizing. For a moment Callen just sat there enjoying the moment, then he breath all the deeply his rib allowed and he walked to the sport area, still thinking about Kamran; she was growing up so fast! Alone, broom in hand the boy fought against the wind and his own demons.

\- "Hey Aiden!

\- "Uncle Callen! Dad said you weren't coming! He had just gone. What happen to you?"

\- "Classified information, cadet! But I'll be fine" – he smiled- "I didn't want to miss your party! Sorry I'm late!"

\- "The party or the cake? Just kidding, it's great to see you."

\- "How are you doing, buddy?"

\- "Good"- he answered too quickly.

\- "Cleaning in your birthday?"

\- "It's just another day, not big deal."

\- "Yes, it's big deal. You're turning eighteen."

Aiden didn't answer. He took a seat in the grandstand and put the broom at his side.

\- "You know that I know, right? That life is everything but good. Pretending you don't care or that you're fine changes nothing. Believe me."

The teenager seemed to think about that for a second.

\- "How did you do, then?"

\- "I didn't for a long time. Denial allows you to survive, but not to live."

\- "And?"

\- "I met your family and your mother made for me my first birthday cake. It was the worst and the best birthday cake I ever had."- G smiled remembering.

\- "Well, no more cakes, now"- said Aiden bitterly.

\- "You're right, but you've enjoyed seventeen."

\- "And that's supposing to make me feel good?"

\- "No. Not now, not yet. But maybe this will."- Callen took a package out of his pocket and handled it to the boy.

\- "You came here just to give me a present?"- he was surprised.

\- "Not mine, your mother's."

\- "What? She promised me something, but dad disagreed and they fought because of me."

\- "And as usual she won the fight. She let this for you. Are you going to open it or not?"

At first he tried to take his time, but after two seconds he did as he always used to do when little and he tore the paper that covered the box. Carefully he opened the lid and his eyes filled with tears.

\- "I guess it is what she promised."- said Callen.

\- "Yeah…"- Aiden was overwhelmed.

\- "When you finish school I'll give you the recoil spring and the hammer pin. Don't forget that even useless is still a weapon and you should be careful."

\- "I… this…"- the poor boy had lost his words and was deeply moved.- "Thank you Uncle Callen."

\- "Aren't you a bit old now to call me Uncle Callen?"

He laughed and wiped his tears.

\- "Noooooo. Even old people have uncles"

\- "I guess so, nephew."- Callen patted his back in a tender gesture.

The sun had disappeared on the horizon a while ago and a chill wind started to remove more leafs from the trees. The automatic lights in the garden turned on and they both knew that the conversation was over.

\- "So now is when you're telling me that I've to take care of my sister."

\- "Nope. Let her find her way, she'll be fine, but if you are feeling sad just share a banana with her, she'll make your day better."

Aiden walked Callen to the parking lot and hugged him. It was the first time of that day that he felt good, then, running he went to the school; maybe the film wasn't that bad after all.

When G reached the highway it was completely dark. If he was lucky he'd have six hours of driving ahead and he was more than tired, nevertheless he felt better than he did in a long time.

P.S.: Sleep tight Guest ;)


	52. Chapter 52

A.N.: Don't be shy! I'll be more than happy if you let me know what do you think of this story. Thank you as always for reading and for being there for soooo long!

Chapter 52

Next day Sam woke up early, definitely his back didn't agree with the damn couch on his living room. He was resolute to come back to work as soon as possible because he couldn't stand the idea of being alone in his house without Michelle and the kids. Last afternoon for a first time in his life he wasn't in a hurry to get out of the airport. He knew nobody was waiting for him at home and that fact was taking him down. He was conscious that life was hard; he had dealt so many times with the worst of humanity that he knew first hand, but never like that. Each time he came back to L.A. from a terrible mission, each time he was injured or simply sad, he could rely on something: a true home filled with the laughs of two wonderful and funny kids and the love, support, understanding and caring of Michelle. Without all that he had nothing but his job and nobody would prevent him from being in the field doing what he had to do to carry on with his life. At seven a.m. he was already in the office.

\- "Good afternoon G!"- saluted Sam when Callen entered the bull pen.

\- "Afternoon? nine thirty in the morning!" - he said looking at his phone.

\- "If I didn't know you I would say you were sleeping."

\- "In fact I was sleeping."

\- "Where is your watch?"

Callen looked sad at the recent pink scar on his wrist and sighed. Michelle… it seemed like an eternity ago. He couldn't go there. Not yet.

\- "It blew up..."- he whispered.

\- "Mr. Callen! Good afternoon!"- said Hetty approaching the two partners and making G roll his eyes.

\- "Hello Hetty, I didn't know you were coming so soon."

\- "Well, given the last developments I considered my presence here would be more appreciated than in the capital. And, what the heck, I was tired of that bunch of hypocrite politicians and cold rainy days. Can I have a word with you on my desk, please?"

\- "Only if I can have a tea."- smiled G glad to have Hetty back.

\- "What about a jasmine blue lagoon?"- she asked going to her space.

G was about to answer when out of the corner of his eye he saw his partner gliding on his chair apparently disappointed about something.

\- "Lunch together, Sam?"

\- "Yeah, why not?"

Trying to hide his limp G followed Hetty. The car trip hadn't gone as well as planed and after three hours driving he was hurting so bad that he couldn't continue anymore. Luckily he was able to hang in there until he found a motel where to crash for a while. He was really pissed off, the new injuries could postpone his return to active job and with Sam back he needed to be there for him, but even without Sam he couldn't compromise an operation like last time. He had been lucky, but luck didn't last. Feverish for the pain and the effort he barely managed to change the bandage on his shoulder, to take two aspirins and to put some ice on the knee, before collapsing in bed. Another terrible nightmare woke him up some hours later. It was about Michelle again, trying to say something that he couldn't hear because Khaled had his ears in his hands. The distress was so intense that he felt like crying and for a while he wasn't able to react. It has been a long time since nightmares did that to him, experience was the best teacher and he usually found the resources in his mind to avoid that haunted and spooky feeling once he awoke.

In spite of the rough start of the day and the painful change of bandages that let him shaky and weak he recalled the last day conversations with Sam's kids and his heart let him know that he did the right thing. They were amazing guys and he only had to make sure they would be ok which implied more than ever to protect Sam no matter what. Overall he felt better. At five in the morning, after a light breakfast and some coffee, he was ready to hit the road again and to deal with the terrible traffic jam of L.A. rush hour.

Hetty and G spent the next hours talking about what happened in Washington, the Machiavellian maneuvers and plans of the Secretary of Defense and his gang, the operation, the prisoners and the status they had, the next moves and the possible new strategies to follow concerning Washington. But G had other worries in his mind. Tired of the disgusting political shit he asked Hetty:

\- "What about what I asked for? It's been more than a week."

\- "For reasons beyond my control your request can't be granted yet."

\- "Hetty is more than urgent now!"- he cried more than upset.

\- "And I'm well aware of that Mr. Callen"- answered Hetty not expecting his reaction.

\- "When?"- G's eyes were cold.

\- "Another week, I'm afraid."

G's temper exploded, he got up pushing the chair abruptly and walked around trying to calm down.

\- "How the hell I'm supposed to do my job, Hetty? I need more resources, there's no turning point now, don't you see it? this is war and I'll need new soldiers if I can't fix what I have."

\- "Mr. Callen I know you're subjected to a lot of pressure, but I remember you that you caused this situation and, right now, your rage is not helping."

\- "Now, it's me who don't help, as always." -he blurted out really hurt for Hetty's words.

There were not many things that could surprise Hetty, but she was surely taken aback by her pupil's subtle deterioration. Certainly he was trying his best to control every detail on his appearance: he was tidy, freshly shaved and stylish dressed. Casual conversation, cheeky smiles, he was for sure more than good, nevertheless she knew better. His movements weren't as fluid as they should be, the bandage on his eyebrow was bigger which indicated that the butterfly strips were gone for bad and even if he was more than good at dissimulating it, Hetty guessed a lesion in the leg, fortunately not a broken bone. He was the master at hiding pain and probably he had even a plausible answer if someone asked him about the marks of his teeth in his lower lip, the fact that he was using more his left hand than his right one, the unnatural parlor on his face or the now sadly habitual dark bags under his eyes. Something had happened during her absence and for his inappropriate remarks and his lack of perspective she doubted for once if that mission wasn't above of his possibilities and capacities. As he said the moment all this started, this was huge and accustomed to work alone or with a select group of people the operation was far beyond his comfort zone. And she felt guilty. Guilty of giving him wings and letting him know that he could do it when it was clear than the price was too high. Behind his explosions of rage it always was pain. She couldn't stand seeing him suffering and if it was time to short his leash, she would do it without a doubt, for his own good.


	53. Chapter 53

A.N.: As always thank you for reading and supporting this story. You're great! :)

Chapter 53

Ruminating Hetty's words G reached the stairs before Sam could remind him about the lunch. His shoulder hurt, a lot, and that made him feel even angry. When he entered ops he thought that Eric's smile was out of place.

\- "Hi Callen"

\- "Hello Eric. Nell."

\- "Congratulations!"

\- "On what?"

\- "Well, the operation, all the detentions, that was awesome!"

\- "This is only a battle Eric, not the war"- he cut his enthusiasm- "Nell, why aren't you working with the C.I.A.?"

\- "They are the experts Callen, I can't do anything and Eric needs help"

\- "I thought I made myself clear last time. If Eric needs help he can ask me for it and I'll try to provide. On the other hand I need you to control the interrogations. Nobody but you touch Mario Alberto Suarez."

\- "He is not talking."

\- "Well, then you have a problem and I expect a solution."

Nell went out of the room without discussion. She wasn't happy she believed that once the operation finished she could return to her habitual job and Callen just threw cold water on her.

Eric was more than disappointed.

\- "Please Eric, send to my computer the last update of the teams. I need everyone alert and in their zones."

\- "Sending"- he said in a tone of voice that showed how upset he was.

\- "And now, tell me what is preventing you for doing your job."

Eric's list was more an excuse to work with Nell than a real necessity and one hour after Callen headed downstairs ready to work on the reports. Still upset for the attitude of the youngest members of the team Callen sat at his desk, turned the computer on and downloaded the files. The trip to San Francisco wasn't such a good idea after all - he thought seeing the enormity of the job cumulated. His phone rang.

\- "Callen"

\- "Hi G, it's Sam Hanna, your partner, remember?" – said Sam from his desk looking a G in the eyes.

\- "Why are you phoning me?"

\- "Because I'm waiting for you since seven in the morning and eight hours later you went directly to your desk ignoring me."

\- "I'm sorry, Sam"

\- "What about lunch?"

\- "I really…"

\- "You really need to eat and so do I, your choice"

\- "Sam…"

\- "Ok, then I choose, chicken tacos at Marina del Rey, taqueria Chihuahua, you invite for keep me waiting, and thank your god that I'm cheap."

\- "You're everything but cheap."

Reluctantly G followed Sam to the little restaurant near the beach. The tension in the car was palpable and G couldn't do anything to prevent it. His mind was on the operation and how to play the next move, he needed his team back on the game as soon as possible.

\- "Ok, G, that's enough."- said Sam

\- "Eh?"-

\- "Can you come back to Earth or you are planning to remain silent all the time?

\- "Sorry Sam. What do you want me to say?"

\- "I want you to answer me a question."

\- "I can't answer if you don't ask the question."

\- "Why?"

\- "Why? That's you question? Why what?"- said G looking at his partner- "What kind of question is that? Why? Instead of "how are you?" or "how was your trip" or "how can I help you?""

\- "How can I help you? You're kidding right?"

\- "Forget it."

If Sam was angry G was upset, but they remained in silence until they found themselves sat in the terrace with all kind of tacos and guacamole in front of them.

\- "That's good"- commented Callen engulfing his second taco in no time.

\- "You didn't answer my question"

\- "Your question."- sighed G- "Why. Why what?"

\- "There are many whys, like why are you eating like there's no tomorrow or why you look like you had a motorcycle accident or why you didn't come to Aiden's birthday or why Nell was crying?

G laughed bitterly.

\- "Well, maybe it's because I'm really hungry and this is good, maybe I did have a motorcycle accident, maybe I was at Aiden's birthday and maybe Nell is not doing her job."

It was Sam turn to laugh, but he wasn't happy.

\- "And maybe you're lying."

\- "Why?"- asked G letting his half eaten taco in the dish.

\- "Why? Why what?"

\- "Why do you think I'm lying?"

\- "Because you weren't there yesterday"

\- "This is ridiculous. You don't believe me ask your kids! I phoned you, I was hoping to come back with you, but you didn't answer the phone!"

\- "You went to San Francisco."

\- "I told you I would!"

Sam looked at his partner in the eyes and he only could see hurt.

\- "I changed my ticket plane. Aiden wanted to spend some time with his friends and I let them soon at school. I didn't see you call."

\- "I know. It's ok"- contemporized G giving another try to his taco that suddenly wasn't so good.

\- "I… Aiden went around like a lost soul and Kam, well, she can be so… I mean… one second she's telling jokes the next one she's asking you for the universal remedy."

G chuckled.

\- "They are teenagers and they lost their mum in a terrible way, what do you expect?"

\- "I don't know."

\- "You have great kids, Sam, you must be proud."

For the first time since they were together they recovered a shadow of normality. The day was beautiful, light blue sky, sunny but not hot, some seagulls approached like buzzards at the sight of the untouched tacos. G shuddered and Sam looked at him realizing his parlor.

\- "It's getting cold"- justified Callen standing - "and late. Have you finished? Because I think that these ladies here are waiting for their diner."

\- "Ladies? How do you know they are ladies?"

\- "Well they seemed to be."

\- "Oh yeah? Why?"

\- "I don't know, the way they were looking" – said Callen entering into the car careful of not touching the back of the seat with his shoulder. He was in pain and the tension of the day was taking its toll.

\- "Now you're an expert in seagulls."- said Sam sitting behind the wheel.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw G touching his eyebrow. He knew his partner and he knew he was in pain even if nothing in his demeanor suggested it.

\- "Ok. Let me see."

\- "What?"

\- "Your eyebrow. It's bothering you."- he stared at his partner seriously.

\- "It's nothing Sam-"- G sensed that no matter what he said Sam wasn't going to let it go –"ok, just be more careful than last time"- he warned turning his head and presenting his bandaged eyebrow to Sam who carefully removed one side of the surgical tape exposing the wound. It was a big blue surrounding the cut that had the edges red and purple.

\- "You need stitches, G, and it doesn't look good"- he said covering it again.

\- "Well, you're not going to sew me up!"

\- "Nope. I'm not. I don't know how do you managed to open it again, it's like someone hit you full force."

\- "I already told you"- answered G defensively.

The tension returned as an uninvited third passenger of the car and both friends remained in silence until Sam let G in the front door of the Spanish mission.

\- "Thank you for the ride." – said Callen getting out.

\- "G!"- called Sam- "On the stack of your table. It's what you wanted."

Callen tapped twice the hood of the car by way of farewell. When he arrived at his desk he saw it and his heart sank. It was Sam's test to be an active agent passed with flying colors, as always.

\- "Mr. Callen!" – Hetty's bossy tone didn't presage anything good –"are you ready?"

\- "Ready for what?"

\- "Your stitches!"

Hetty's torture let G in not condition to work. Lying on the couch he read the text Kam just sent:

\- "Daddy called. He can be reaaaally annoying."

\- "I know" – G texted back.

\- "How do u bear w him?"

\- "He keeps me safe & makes things better."

After several minutes of silence another text came to G's phone:

\- "U re right"


	54. Chapter 54

A.N.: Sometimes the people you love is the people you hurt the most. I hope you like this one ;) As always thank you!

Chapter 54

When next day at seven in the morning Sam and Eric walked in the bull pen G had been already working for two hours. He spent the first one after another nightmare woke him taking care of his wounds. The shoulder burn was killing him. It was like having one hundred needles that randomly pinched him without warning. He knew that he needed to be extra careful in order to avoid an infection and in spite of the pain and the difficulty of the posture he took his time cleaning it and putting the antibiotic ointment. The good news were that his rib allowed him to breath more deeply each time without making him bent over because of the pain. He knew it was healing, just not as quick as he needed to and that made him be mad.

\- "Morning guys"

\- "Good morning G"

\- "Callen" – saluted Eric on his way to ops.

\- "Don't you stay for a coffee, Eric?"- asked Callen.

\- "I rather start working"- he said disappearing upstairs.

G sighed. He really missed Eric's nonsenses.

\- "How was it?"- said Sam signaling G's new bandage over his eyebrow.

Callen killed him with his stare.

\- "Painful, thank you. I didn't know what to choose if the needle of the lidocaine or the other one with the thread. You fed my nightmares for another season."

\- "Don't be such a scaredy-cat. You needed the stitches and the sooner the better."

Sam seemed to be having fun at the expense of Callen's fear, but G was making a true effort to erase from his mind the awful and vivid memory of Hetty and the syringe. He had no time to deal with that now, so he picked his mug and went to the sideboard at the back to refill his coffee trying to hide his limping.

\- "So, did you see it?"- asked Sam signaling the stack of papers on G's desk– "My status."

\- "Yeah, Sam, I've seen it."

\- "And?"

\- "And what?"

\- "You know, what is my mission? This is your operation and the only thing I know is that apparently you have a lot of prisoners waiting to be interrogated."

\- "Hum, oh, yeah, the prisoners…"- said G distracted- "I think you can use some free time, just to get things settled and to figure out how to deal, well…, the kids at the school."

\- "Say it G. Without Michelle."- now was Sam's stare which could fulminate Callen.

\- "Sam…"- he couldn't go there, it was too painful.

Sam knew that if he pressed the issue G would retreat himself into his shell so he changed the subject:

\- "I'm ready and you have the proof, right here"- he picked the paper from the table and handled it to his partner.

G had been thinking all night about it and he more he thought the clearest he saw it. Of course he needed Sam doing the interrogatories, of course he could use his expertise in the field with the units, and of course he would be happy to have him at his side challenging his decisions and making things better, but he was sure that precisely that is what Sam didn't need at this moment. Until Hetty didn't provide him what he had asked for he was condemned to play by ear.

\- "In fact Sam, I may have something for you. I need you to go undercover."

\- "Undercover? In the Molina cartel? Are you kidding right?

\- "No, Sam, not in the Molina cartel, but in a special unit that I can't lead right now."

\- "Why don't regroup our unit G? You know how everybody is willing to work together again."

\- "I wish I could, but I need the guys right where they are, and in fact I think it's also good for them to have some distance."

\- "I totally disagree. We need to stay together now more than ever!" – Sam couldn't prevent his voice from rising, upset.

\- "Well, I'm sorry you don't agree Sam, but the decision is taken."

\- "Stop saying that you are sorry when you're not."- said Sam.

Lately his conversations with G swung from an extreme to the other and it was exhausting for both of them.

\- "You're right, I'm not sorry, the way you're not sorry for making Hetty to stitch me yesterday."

Callen's blue stare was defiant and Sam had to bit his lip to stop his response.

\- "Ok. Where is my unit and what is the mission?"

\- "Ready for a ride? Give me five minutes. I'll meet you in the car."

True to his word five minutes after G put a package in the Challenger's truck and gave Sam an address.

\- "This mission is about information Sam. I want you to be open minded even if you disagree."

\- "You know that I'm an open minded person, G, what is this about? Extraterrestrial life?"

\- "Kind of."

G's phone biped with a text message:

\- "U.C. what's the formula for the ammonia?"

\- "NH3 Why?"

\- "Making a bomb"

\- "WTF?"

\- "I got u. Another bad word!"

\- "Another secret?"

\- ;-)

Out of the corner of his eye Sam saw G smiling for the first time in ages. His eyes seemed brighter and he had that childlike expression that drove Hetty crazy. Sam smiled back and looked his partner for a moment guessing he was texting Anna.

\- "What?"- G asked blushing.

\- "Nothing."

\- "So why are you looking at me like that?"

\- "That girl, she really conquered your tin heart."

G smiled.

\- "Yeah. She did."- he said putting the black phone on his pocket.

\- "So, what about E.T.?"

\- "He is a great guy, you can call him Sargent Ben and he had a large unit under his wing."

\- "Military?"

\- "Mostly"

\- "And why undercover?"

\- "Your mission is to provide Sargent Ben the aid and the vision he could lack. I expect you to read between the lines and to send me a report with what's important without underestimated the messengers."

\- "You're not being any helpful, G."

\- "Ok, you can park here. And by the way my name is Carlson."

Sam parked next to a park genuinely intrigued. G took the parcel from the truck and handled it to Sam.

\- "What's that?"

\- "Artie's big brother"

\- "What?"

\- "You know, Deeks' jacket"

\- "I know who Artie is"

\- "Then?"

Sam was still trying to process the information when a black man wearing rags and all smile showed up from nowhere.

\- "Carlson, man, good to see you!"

\- "Hey Sargent Ben! What's up?"- saluted G shaking hands.

\- "I may have some information for you…" – he said waiving his hand secretively- "They are moving…"

Callen put a hand in the other's man back and lend a bit to whisper in his ear:

\- "Sargent Ben, do you remember the special mission I told you about? Well, he is here. Please take a good care of him. And all the information you may have, he'll know what to do about it. He's a great guy, even if he doesn't seem one."

G addressed to Sam who was still shocked:

\- "Roger, this is Sargent Ben, your new partner."

\- "Sargent Ben"

\- "Roger"

\- "Well guys, I hope you make a good team."

Without further comments G turned and went away down the street knowing that he was hurting Sam. He only hoped one day his partner could forgive him because he was resolute to be inflexible.


	55. Chapter 55

A.N.: Still there? thank you!

Chapter 55

When G arrived to the mission he was shocked at the sight of his desk. Instead of his computer, tablet and papers, his table was covered with a tablecloth and a full service of silverware was settled. Angry he went to talk with the guilty party.

\- "What's that Hetty?"- he asked signaling the desk.

\- "Do you want a description or a reason?"

\- "Really, Hetty, I don't have time for this!"

\- "Answer me a question Mr. Callen and I want a sincere response. When was last time you eat properly, sat on a table and using silverware instead of your hands like a monkey?"

G doubted for a second; in fact he couldn't remember.

\- "Thank you. You've just answered. So please, sit and enjoy your meal."

\- "Hetty, you can't do that, you can't treat me like ..."

\- "Like what Mr. Callen? like a person I care for?"

G looked at Hetty in the eyes and saw a hint of something he knew very well but that he had never seen in her: fear. He refused to be the cause of that he decided he could certainly spare half an hour for Hetty as long as it didn't became a habit, so he sat at table and ate a three courses meal in her company. In other circumstances he would have been delighted, nevertheless pain and anguish were not very fond of appetite and lately it was all he was feeling. He knew he had to be grateful and he was, but he didn't stand to lose control of his life.

After four hours of reviewing transcripts, listening to interrogatories, following leads and testing possible movements of the units on the computer, G was exhausted and angry, but Hetty was pleased of seeing him focused and apparently calm. The moment she went out, not before insisting in bringing him with her, G changed into sweat pants and a now too big long sleeve T-Shirt, and hit the gym. His head had always worked better when he moved, all that inactivity drove him crazy; the problem was to manage the pain and to force his body to do the things he wanted to do. The climbing wall was inconceivable, treadmill or bike with the knee like that out of question, lifting weights no way. He started with a light stretching and even that was painful. He didn't know how he was going to pass the test, nevertheless with Washington putting pressure and Sam back on the game he was more resolute than ever. Half an hour later he was more than pessimistic but Kensi's smile when she entered the room was like a sunshine illuminating his dark thoughts. Some minutes of casual chat and they were in position.

\- "So, are you ready?"- she asked.

G nodded from the floor concentrated on the first cone.

\- "Go!"

He propelled his body forward launched his right leg in order to start running just to fell down the next second in pain; his knee wasn't ready to support all his weight.

\- "Are you ok?"

\- "Yeah. Let's do it."

He stretched a bit and got in position.

\- "Ready, steady, go!"

Again Callen fell down and this time he could prevent a groan of pain and rage. He got up quickly but he limped to come back to the start spot.

\- "Wow, wow, wow! Stop. What's happening Callen?"

\- "It's nothing serious, really. I need to do it Kens!"

\- "The only thing you are doing now is hurting yourself! let me see."

\- "Kensi! please!"

But she was already raising the leg of his sport pants and revealing his swollen and purple knee.

\- "Oh gosh! how can you even walk with that? are you sure it's not broken?"

\- "Yeah, I'm sure" - Callen tried to prove it flexing his leg quickly, but it was obvious that the movement was painful.

\- "Let me get you some ice."

\- "Kens! I'm fine!" -but she was already gone.

Minutes later both were sat at the bench. Kensi had secured with a bandage an ice pack on G's knee and they were sharing a bottle of water.

\- "How did you manage to do this number on you?"

\- "I fell down."

\- "Right. Ok, ok, you don't have to tell me. But you know that you're not going pass the test."

Callen looked at her in the eyes, defiantly and started to take the bandage off.

\- "Callen, please, stop!"

\- "I'm going to pass the test this week, with or without your help."

\- "You know that you're a bloody pigheaded, don't you?

\- "I'd been called worse."

\- "Ok, so broken rib, hurt knee, your eyebrow obviously..."

The way G averted his gaze made Kens ask.

\- "And?"

G sighed and raised the sleeve of his shirt letting her see some of the scratches along his arm, deeper on the elbow.

\- "It goes on to the shoulder."

Kens was appalled.

\- "You fell."

\- "Yep."

\- "From a helicopter?"

G laughed.

\- "C'mon Kens I'm not a cripple. I really need to do this."

\- "There's maybe a way..."

\- "I'm all ears!"

\- "If you just want to pass and you don't care about the time you do, even if it's going to your file."

\- "I don't care."

\- "Then I think that if you do the circuit at the wrong side you can have a possibility"

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "Well" - she said walking to the lines and cones on the floor- "the way you're supposed to do it to optimize your time is from right to left, but if you start with your left..."

\- "I'll be eating all the cones because they will be placed on my way."

\- "No if you add an extra step, look!" - she said doing it.

\- "I see, but the time..."

\- "I know it will be awful, but if you only want to pass this is the only thing I can figure out."

\- "Ok let me try!"

\- "What? you're kidding right? not now! you only hurt yourself more!"

\- "But Kens..."

\- "You have to practice in your head."

\- "In my head."- he said incredulously.

\- "Yes, like learning a choreography. The moment you can see the movements in your head your body will follow, so for now watch me."

Kensi did the circuit twice and when she was about to start again G stopped her.

\- "I got it Kens, thank you."

\- "Are you sure?"

\- "left, left, right, left, jump, left, right, left, right, left feint left, right left turn, left down, left up left, right, left feint and repeat.

\- "Yep, you got it" - she said surprised.

\- "Well, you did it twice."

\- "Ok, now the only thing tricky will be the shooting test."

Callen touched his ear, he positively knew that a big noise could make the word spin, but Kensi was thinking about a different matter.

\- "Vaseline."

\- "Vaseline, you mean the sticky jelly thing for chapped lips?"

\- "I'm sure Deeks would have found another use, but yes"

\- "He is not my type"- interrupted G laughing. Quick Kensi hit him on the arm -"Ouch!"

\- "Surf, Callen, I meant surf boards; why all guys are always thinking the same?"

\- "Maybe because we have a misplaced neuron."

\- "It must be, the only one you guys have is definitely misplaced."

\- "So Vaseline."

\- "Yes, these scratches you have will be covered in some days with a scab and your movements would be limited. You force and your skin will open."

\- "I haven't thought about that."

\- "If you put a big layer of Vaseline on your arm your skin will gain elasticity. You only have to dress a very tight long sleeve impermeable undershirt to prevent people from noticing."

\- "I'm starting to wonder if I need to review your last evaluations."- said Callen amused.

\- "You know it's not cheating, you still need to be fit enough to be able to do everything in time and it's not so simple. And in the field is Deeks' back the one I should watch, I'm not bargaining with his life."- she was serious.

\- "Hey Kens, I swear you that I'm not going to put in the line anyone's life because of my injuries. Me not being an active agent can cause legal problems on the operation and I can't risk losing everything for a loophole."

\- "Good to know."

\- "I thought you knew me well enough to even think about that."- he said sad.

\- "C'mon Callen! I didn't mean to say that!"

\- "It's ok"

\- "Are we good?"

\- "We're good."- He answered, but in the bottom of his heart G was hurt. He always thought that his co-workers knew he would be there for them, no matter what, and in the field he was willing to take more risks than the others just to protect them. Kensi's innocent but veiled accusation opened even more the gap between him and his team.


	56. Chapter 56

A.N.: I know, dark times for the team. I hope you bear with Callen and me ;) thank you for your support! It means a lot, really!

Chapter 56

After another rough night at the boatshed G and his headache arrived at the office just in time of finding a very angry Sam sat on the big couch talking to Hetty, who didn't seem happy either.

\- "Mr. Callen, good morning."

\- "Is it, Hetty? Sam, I believed you were undercover."

\- "And that's precisely what we're discussing"- said Hetty- "could you, please, have a seat?"

\- "I didn't know you needed an intermediary to talk to me Sam."

\- "G, don't do this more difficult."

\- "Ok, you corned me without even the right to have a coffee and I'm doing things difficult."

G sat on the little sofa facing his friend and mentor and for the look in their faces he knew exactly what was going on.

\- "Mr. Callen, please. Mr. Hanna updated me about his new, ahem, mission, and we both are wondering about the exact purpose you may have with his assignment."

\- "I thought I made myself clear. The purpose is to obtain privileged information."

\- "And you sent me to work with your new friend who is incapable of peeing in a toilet and his bunch of beggars that are so excited about you giving them money that they are inventing stories just to get my attention."

G paled. He knew that Sam wasn't in his best moment but his lack of perspective made him sad.

\- "What do you think Hetty?"- asked G.

\- "I must confess that at this point I am more than confused about this operation. Three days ago you assessed a big blow to the cartel and, instead of taking advantage of the situation and put some pressure, you just gave the order of blocking the units on their last positions. Then you recover a lead agent, someone you trust, and instead of putting him in charge of the interrogatories you sent him to the streets in doubtful company."

Callen knew Hetty was being sincere and open, she seemed genuinely surprised and she was trying to give him the opportunity to explain. Nevertheless, G felt once again his authority being questioned, he felt the lack of respect his team had for his decisions, it was clear that they didn't trust him, neither as a professional nor as a person not even as a friend. He knew he decision was a good one. Sam needed to be right where he sent him unless until he got back his damn status of active agent. He swallowed his sadness and replaced it by coldness. Getting up without a word he went out of the relax zone.

\- "Hetty…"- started to complain Sam.

\- "Shhh Mr. Hanna. He is coming back."

Cursing the stabbing pain on his rib G disconnected the wires of one of the screens and made a new connection with Nell's secondary computer. He searched for a while until he found the file he was looking for, then trying not to hurt himself further, he pushed the screen to the area where Hetty and Sam were, and installed, without any rush, the equipment there.

\- "G, this is ridiculous. Are you going to give me a lecture? You don't need all this stuff to give me an explanation."

\- "It seems to me that I do. Both of you have questions and I'll do my best to answer them once and for all."

G clicked on the first file and the picture of a young smiling black man appeared on the screen.

\- "This is Sargent Benjamin LeBron Kent. He was the second of his promotion at Lyman Ward Military Academy, Camp Hill, in… yes, you guessed well, Alabama. The first one was his twin Sargent Michael Demondre Kent. They both did two tours on the Gulf War and both won the Bravery Medal for their intervention at the Operation Southern Watch. Sadly Sargent Michael Demondre Kent won it posthumously. Sargent Ben was badly injured; he lost a kidney, half a lung and the splint and a leg and he passed nearly two years from hospital to hospital trying to find a remedy for his incontinence even without a health insurance. Eugene L. Mansen, he hates Eugene, so you better call him Gene. His two years in Bosnia as private made him to leave the army just to join the United Nations humanitarian force. Roberto Silva, Captain Silva, he saved the twenty men of his unit one by one at Colombia in an operation that our country deny, so his actions never took place and he never got the pension he deserve. It just happens that I was walking by the same country, the same dates and I've a little idea of the hell that prevents him for sleeping at night. Do you want me to follow? because the list goes on. I've spent enough time with these guys in the street to know that they can be fucked up, but they were good then and they are good now if you know how to listen. I need them and I need you to be with them."

Sam was furious.

\- "Now are you accusing me of what? I know how it looks the hell you describe, I've been there, but I don't understand the point. This is not an N.G.O. and my job is not taking care of homeless population. But now I see the time you spent with these guys is the time you didn't spent with my kids."

Hetty looked at the two partners. Sam was fighting to control his temper, his eyes full of questions and reproach. Callen seemed calm, composed, but Hetty knew him well enough to know that Sam's words were hurting him, that behind his cold front was a sensitive heart waiting for approval.

\- "You're making this personal and it's not. Of all people working in this operation I didn't expect you to question orders, and right now, you're disobeying the order of your immediate superior. I want you to come back to your unit and I'm waiting for your yesterday's report."

Hetty sighed and incredulity reflected on Sam's face. He looked at Hetty searching for support but she reacted the only way she could do at that point.

\- " , you heard your team leader. If you don't have further questions about your assignment I suggest you to come back to work."

\- "My yesterday's report is on your desk as you ordered, sir. Maybe next thing you find there is my resignation."

Without further words Sam went out the Spanish mission. Callen, who had been trying to keep his façade all the time, felt all of a sudden the forces leaving him and the headache which had been waiting his turn returned with renewed energy. He sat in the sofa and supported his head with his left hand.

\- "Thank you Hetty" -he said.

\- "Oh no, Mr. Callen, don't thank me. You were right about Sam's attitude and this time I didn't have any other choice but supporting your decision, but God knows that I don't understand nor share your reasons. This is the last time I'm going against my own judgement."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Deeks was angry. Three days already since the operation in the port and he was still trapped with his bored unit in the same zone. He couldn't even leave to go home at night because he risked a rebellion on board, so he was alone in the task of controlling his ex-coworkers and hatting every second of it. Nothing was happening there and he and his men were sure that action was taking place in another zone of the city. The usual network of L.A.P.D. informers was talking about a deal in a warehouse, and old factory between Little Tokyo and the Arts District, nevertheless Deeks was resolute to follow orders this time, his head was playing over and over again the fall of the biker that saved his day.

\- "Nell you have to do something, I don't think I can control the guys one more day here."

\- "You already told me Deeks, as well as Talia, Bradford, Murphy and the others, but it's not me who give the orders!"

\- "But you're the liaison, talk to Callen!"

\- "He disappeared just after the operation he barely grunted me some instructions about the interrogations and took a free weekend to go to San Francisco. Now he put Sam to work on the streets with some beggars without back up. I'm sorry I'm not supposed to say all this, but you're not the only one fed up with this situation."

\- "The man has definitely lost it."- Deeks thoughts were more than dark- "Listen Nell, there's a way, a legal one to end all this nonsense. We have proofs that Callen is not acting right, if you help me to recover the information I'll write the report to the N.C.I.S.' direction and the Secretary of Defense in order to take him out the case."

\- "Deeks we can't do that! He'll probably lose not only the operation, but they can expulse him of the unit."

Deeks sighed. Nell was right, he couldn't do that to Callen without talking to the group first.

\- "Just get the information ready. I'll talk with Sam and everybody before doing anything, but Nell it's Callen's foolishness or us. At some point we'll need to choose"- he paused before adding- "For now let him know that we have all indications of contraband weapon near Little Tokyo, I don't know if I could prevent my men from going there."

\- "Copy that. But I'm not making any promise Deeks."


	57. Chapter 57

N.A.: I know, the team has lost his patience and Callen is even more alone... or not? Thank you for reading and of course for reviewing! you make me happy :)

Chapter 57

Sam wasn't answering G's calls, but his GPS was active and he knew for Nell that he was on his zone safe and communicating regularly. That's all he needed to know for now. The apparent calm of the Molina cartel was just that, apparent. They were testing and teasing with clues that Callen know couldn't be true. Every unit had suddenly important information about deals and exchanges, it was the cartel's turn to make a move.

\- "Nell, you have read the reports, why do you think that L.A.P.D. is right about the warehouse?"

\- "It seems logic Callen!"

\- "Well, not to me! You're the clever one, so convince me with arguments."

Nell was tired. Her brain was working extra hours with extra pressure. Even if things seemed easier with the coordinators she lately had too much information to process between the daily reports of the units and the interrogatories.

\- "Mario Alberto Suárez confessed and he corroborated the rumors Deeks told me about."

\- "Yes, I saw the video of the interrogation. By the way, congratulations, you are getting to him now. And effectively nothing in his demeanor indicates that he is lying."

\- "But you think he's lying."- affirmed Nell.

\- "Think about it. Imagine for a moment that you're the leader of the Molina cartel and all your operations go wrong suddenly. You don't know the reason and you don't know the enemy, what you will do?"

\- "I'll send someone to check and supervise the operations."

\- "Right. The cartel acts like an enterprise, it has an executive committee and shareholders that in that case are also the owners. All the subaltern staff is not doing their job, so the executive committee reacts and intervenes. Mario Alberto Suárez is the leader of this executive committee. You're a shareholder, what do you do next?"

\- "I'll check what is going on before my enterprise go to bankruptcy."

\- "Exactly."

\- "Are you suggesting that the big bosses of the cartel, the Molina family, are coming?"

\- "No, Nell. They're already here spreading the word about more deals and cargo ships, they are telling us were to go, directly to the lion's den."

\- "I don't understand, Mario Alberto seemed sincere, I don't think he is lying."

\- "Because he probably isn't! don't you see it yet? He is just another piece!" – exclaimed G.

Everything was so clear in Callen's head that he didn't understand why Nell couldn't see things the same way. He agreed with her disagreement, but he needed more from her if she wanted him to change his mind. It was so frustrating!

\- "Anyway Callen. You have L.A.P.D. informants, you have the most prepared unit telling you that the information is good, the principal prisoner corroborates the information, you know that he is not lying, and you don't want to act based on…?"

\- "Call it… experience?"

Nell laughed bitterly.

\- "I call it a hunch and stubbornness."

\- "Whatever. I'll buy your story if you get corroboration from another source. The moment you have it you and Deeks can have the go to set up a plan. But I'm telling you, it's not logic.

\- "I'll tell Deeks. Thank you Callen."

\- "Don't thank me yet, another source, that's the condition. And I think it's time to interrogate … what's his name? Luis García, the driver captured with Suárez. Ask the C.I.A. to question him, please, I would like to see what he has to say."

\- "On it. And by the way, Deeks says that he can't control his men anymore."

\- "Deeks has to learn to follow orders and to take responsibilities."- answered G trying to ignore the pain on his shoulder and back.

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Later in the afternoon:

\- "Ok, ready, steady go!"

Callen started the circuit, the extra step he did to avoid overstressing his knee made him lose time in each sector and when he finished he was pretty sure he didn't get it.

\- "So?"

\- "27 seconds"

\- "It's too much Kens" - he said panting - "I'm going to start it with the right leg."

\- "You know that you can't do it; this is the first time you did the circuit without falling"

\- "But I'm too slow!"- he complaint -"I know the movements and I'm doing them, it's just that I need to train."

\- "If you overdo now your knee will get worse, and the rib hasn't consolidated yet; I don't think is a matter of speed, it's a matter of rhythm."

\- "What do you mean?"- he was sat on the floor massaging his knee with his left hand. He knew she was right, the pain was worse and he wouldn't be able to do it many more times.

\- "It's like dance, you can execute the steps, but your movements will suck until you get the rhythm."

\- "C'mon Kens! - his tone was desperate.

\- "Callen who is the coach? bear with me!"

She went out just to return some minutes later with several cd's.

\- "We need something quick... that's it!" - She put the cd and the first chords of LLCool J "You Can't Dance" started to sound.

\- "Rap, really?"

\- "C'mon Callen!" said Kensi dancing and giving him a hand to get up -"I have seen you, and I know you dance."

\- "Viennese waltz!"

\- "It's all the same, waltz, foxtrot, bachata, rap... all is about rhythm; look! five, six, seven and ..." - she did the circuit following the rhythm of the music.

Callen was more than down, seeing Kensi everything seemed easy and fluid, he was starting to feel really weak and he knew that he couldn't practice much more. Kensi read his mood on his eyes, she had been there not so long ago and she knew the way to come back to the word of the living.

\- "Hey, just once more, promised, but on my way. Close your eyes, c'mon Callen!

Callen complied, he would try just to humor Kensi.

\- "Now breath and count listening to the music, one, two, three, four... visualize your movements in the lyrics. Your turn."

\- "This is silly"- he said but he got in position.

\- "Count in your head and dance, five, six, seven, eight and one, two...c'mon! up, left, left seven, eight, right, left, three, four, five, six, seven, eight! Oh man you're a natural!"

Callen was panting sweat on his face. Every single cell of his body asking him to rest.

\- "And?"

\- "23 seconds"

\- "It sucks"

\- "Of course it sucks, but you've pass. Dance, baby, dance."

Both of them laughed a ray of hope made his way through the black clouds of G's heart.

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The change of the bandage had let Callen completely worn out. The sweat and the exercise didn't contribute to make things easier and once the rush for the sport was down he needed to sleep. Since her return he could feel Hetty's eyes permanently in his nape, she was watching every movement, every detail and even if for now she seemed to back him up he knew that that would last much longer. He gave her the slip and installed on the couch of the boatshed waiting for Morpheus to come. His phone biped:

\- "Dad called again!"

\- "He miss u."

\- "Ur dad calls u a lot?"

\- "No"

\- "Why?"

\- "I guess he doesn't love me like ur daddy loves u."

\- "And do u love him?"

\- "Kind of weird, but I do."


	58. Chapter 58

A.N.: First of all my apologizes for not being able to update before. More than busy days the last ones! Anyway I hope you are still there and you'll enjoy this chapter :)

Chapter 58

For the first time since the capture, interrogations started to yield some fruits. They got an address 206 E 8th St, the address of a little Mexican restaurant, Sonoratown, where Julio Molina used to diner each first Wednesday of the month. Later in the day the confirmation came unexpectedly from Sam in his report for the previous day. One of the members of the silent army, the new name that Sargent Ben had created for them, told Sam that the suspect gave him every week a ten dollar bill before going to eat. Definitely that day was perfect- thought G.

\- "So you did it!"- exclaimed Kensi giving five to Callen.

\- "With the worst time and scores ever, but I've passed. I'm an active agent now! Thanks to you Kens. I owe you big time."

\- "It's funny, I never thought I could teach you anything new about cheating."

\- "Always learning."

Alone in the gym Sam was angry, in fact more than angry; half an hour of battering the punch bag hadn't change a bit his wish of doing the same with his partner. This time was bad, he screwed up, but he wouldn't allow this to happen anymore. He heard voices and laughs on the stairs, Kensi was saying something about changing her clothes and then Callen went into the room.

\- "Hey Sam! I thought you were at home. It's kind of late."

\- "Yeah. I could say the same about you. Do you want to train? What about a wrestling match?"

G saw something was wrong with Sam, nevertheless he tried to keep it cool.

\- "I need to warm up for that."

\- "Ok. I'll help you with the warming. Catch this!"- said Sam throwing him a ten kilo medicine ball that G was barely able to caught and throw back.

\- "Too heavy for a start. Don't you think?"

\- "I'm going to tell you what is really heavy."- exclaimed Sam throwing the ball again even harder. – "Heavy is that your partner lied to you."

\- "I've not lied to you Sam"- G returned the ball rolling it on the floor, he didn't like the tone of the conversation.

\- "No? are you sure? Ask me where I was this morning."

\- "Sam if you want to tell me something just say it!"

\- "This morning I was in San Francisco, the director of the Keating Military Academy called me because my son, my son! had committed a grave infraction and they began the proceedings of expulsion against him."

\- "What?"- asked G more than surprised.

\- "They found he was in possession of a gun, G, the gun you gave him!"- Sam cried throwing the ball with such a force that Callen fell down on his back, his hurt shoulder hitting the floor first. Sam approached to him completely out of his mind.

\- "I can explain Sam I'm sure…"- started to say G when a big punch on his face made his nose bleed. He didn't do anything to stop the next one on the cheek. His ear started buzzing even if he knew that Sam hasn't employed all his energy, and his shoulder was sending waves of sharp pain.

\- "Sam!"- cried Kensi running to Callen – "What the hell are you doing?"- she put herself between the two partners and pushed Sam away. The man was furious:

\- "You have nothing to say? Hey G? you just thought that you could compensate my kid for not being there with a gun!? You don't know anything about family, this time you fucked everything up! Don't mess with my kids! Do you hear me?!

\- "Sam, stop! Just go! Please! Now!" – insisted Kensi. Sam threw the gloves to the other side of the gym and went out in two strides.

G didn't make a move, he didn't try to defend himself, he knew his partner damned well to know that he needed time and space at this moment. He felt sad and hurt, but the message was clear. He screwed up. Sam was right he didn't deserve to be part of his family.

\- "Callen! Are you ok?"-Kensi asked kneeling at G's side and touching gently his face- "What the hell happened? Don't move; let me get a towel or something."

Deeks was descending the stairs when Sam went out furious pushing him on his way out. Kensi was the next one going out the gym.

\- "Kensilina, what the hell…?"

\- "Deeks, go with Callen, he is hurt!"

\- "What?!"- running he entered the room just in time to help Callen who had his face and shirt covered in blood to get up. – "Easy, easy"-he said supporting him when he noticed his lack of balance.

\- "It's nothing, really…"

\- "No, of course it's nothing, your partner broke your nose and it's nothing!"

\- "Deeks!"- cried Kensi looked daggers at him-"let's go upstairs. Here"- she added putting a wet towel on Callen's nose-"hold this."

At the end of the stairs Deeks was practically carrying Callen who sat down on the couch like a rag doll. Hetty jumped from her chair more than worried.

\- "Oh Lord! What happened?"- she asked.

A fine sheen of a sweat was building on G's brown and his face continuing to grow paler by the second. He tried to control his breathing, but the room was spinning so quickly that it didn't take long for the nauseas to appear.

\- "Callen, what's wrong?"- asked Kensi anguished.

\- "Dizzy."

\- "Mr. Callen!"- Hetty touched G's nape where a cold sweat was starting to run to his back. G's breathing was fast as well as his heartbeat. He started to retch unable to control it anymore. His blood pressure suddenly down.

\- "Help him to lay down on his side, please."

\- "Careful Deeks! He has a broken rib! – warned Kensi.

A blood stain appeared on the back of G's T-shirt. When Deeks saw Hetty preparing the syringe he also paled.

\- "Miss Blye, please take your partner out of here before we have another accident"-she asked and then added – "Mr. Callen, a little prick."

She swabbed G's hip with alcohol and skillfully, without any hesitation, inserted the needle and depressed the syringe's plunger quickly. The injection stung as sharply as it always did, but by then G was concentrating too hard on not throwing up to even whimper in protest. Some minutes later the nauseas and the vertigo disappeared, letting Callen exhausted and shaky.

\- "Why you always say "a little prick" if it hurts like hell, Hetty?"- he tried to joke.

\- "Well, I guess it's more reassuring than saying that this is going to feel as if a swarm of angry bees are taking their frustrations out deep in your muscle, the pain will increase exponentially, and while the nausea will cease, you will not be able to sit on your butt for two weeks."

\- "True is overrated."

\- "Do you care to explain, Mr. Callen?"

\- "I did something wrong, Sam was angry and punched me, it's my fault. Sorry."

\- "You know that this unit doesn't allow this kind of behavior."

\- "Hetty, please…" – he started to get up-"…I assume all responsibility …hsssss"- a sharp pain made G to hiss and to stop his movement, the blood stain on the back of his T-shirt started to grow. He bit his lip to avoid screaming. The vertigo had let him completely worn out and the protests of his shoulder took advantage of his vulnerability to drew attention.

\- "Calm down now. Just breathe. Let me have a look at you and we'll have this conversation another time."

Hetty got up and went to the toilet to wash her hands.

\- "Miss Blye, could you please bring here the first aid kit? And you Mr. Deeks, please, help Mr. Callen to take the T-shirt off."

When Deeks went to the couch G had already started to get ride off the bloody T-Shirt.

\- "Hey Callen, let me help you."- said Deeks taking the back of the T-shirt.

\- "I don't need your help Deeks."

\- "C'mon don't be stubborn! you're getting things more difficult!"

\- "I'm not the only one, then."- G stared at him.

With the T-shirt finally off Callen laid down again on his stomach, trying to do deep breathings, fighting to recuperate some control. At the sight of the bloody bandage the blues and the nasty healing scratches on his back and arm, Deeks was appalled and all of a sudden he understood.

\- "You were the guy of the motorcycle!" – he said before adding- "And I the one that didn't follow orders."

\- "This is on me, Deeks, it was my fault and it didn't happen, you hear me?"- the tone on Callen's voice didn't leave room for interpretations.

Deeks paled not knowing what to say.

\- "Mr. Callen, save your strength, and you Mr. Deeks go out of here before you pass out"- said Hetty approaching.

With her gloved hands and with infinite delicacy she took the bandage off uncovering Callen's raw shoulder. The marks of the asphalt were deep, it seemed like someone has taken the skin off and then pounded a claw in the wound discovering the muscle. The fall had opened the thin layer of new tissue and he was bleeding.

Kensi shuddered and Deeks put a hand in his mouth. Hetty was horrified; she knew something was wrong but this was too much.

\- "Ok, mister, this is the moment you are going to the hospital. Miss Blye, please call an ambulance."

\- "I am not!"- cried Callen trying to get up -"I can't lose the status again!- the anguish in his voice made Kensi's heart sank. She knew how much he had fight to get it just to lose it some hours later.

\- "Oh yes Mr. Callen, you need proper medical attention not some patch up on a couch."

\- "You can't make me Hetty!" – he was fighting to stand up full of rage.

\- "Of course I can and this is not a negotiation!"

\- "Please Callen! Don't fight."- begged Kensi, but he managed to stand up. At the sudden change of position his nose started to bleed again and he swayed. Deeks managed to catch him before he fall when he passed out.

\- "To ask Mr. Callen not to fight is like asking a kangaroo not to jump. Please, make that call, Kensi."

\- "Hetty…"


	59. Chapter 59

A.N.: Thank you for your wonderful reviews, I'll try to answer everyone, but for all the guest just to let them know that your comments are greatly appreciated. I'll try my best to update everyday this week, so enjoy this one ;)

Chapter 59

First thing G noticed was the disgusting smell of sanitizer and the bip of a heart monitor. A hospital, however something was different. He tried to open his eyes but they were not cooperating so he tried to concentrate in other things. The haze, ok, painkillers, he moved a little and he felt no pain, so it meant an IV. Damn it. Where? He needed to get rid of it. He moved again waiting for the pinch of the needle in his arm, but it didn't come. The noise, better, the lack of noise... it was so hard to focus… the fluffy cotton cloud he felt on his head was claiming him, inviting, warm and cozy, tempting… he hated it and he fought with all his strength.

Kensi heard G's weak moan, how was that possible? Hetty told her that he would be out five more hours, but definitely he was moving and opening his eyes. Unfocused first, but now his blue stare was completely focused on her and full of questions.

\- "Hey Callen! Don't move, it's ok."- she asked touching lightly his arm.

\- "Kens… what…"- his voice was raspy, his throat sore.

\- "Here, some water. You gave us a scare yesterday."- she offered a glass with a straw.

\- "Thanks. How… I mean…"- he was confused.

The moment he pushed the spider webs out of his head and he recognized his room at Hetty's house the questions piled and tried to get out.

\- "Hetty wanted to get you to a hospital, but Deeks and I convinced her. I know how hard you worked to get the status of active agent and Deeks told her about the legal implications for the operation, so she made some phone calls and brought a surgeon here."

\- "Deeks… thank you Kens, really."- he tried to sit on the bed but he felt more than weak. Hated painkillers!

\- "C'mon Callen, lay still, you need to rest. You put such a fight last night that up to four people were needed to put the IV. I don't know how you're able to even move."

\- "I didn't want to go to a hospital"-he looked at his hand with the IV immobilized by a plastic support and bandaged in the way hospitals do with little children to prevent them to harm themselves. He grimaced.

\- "Oh gosh, are you in pain?"

\- "No, no, I'm ok. For once nothing hurts. Where is Hetty?"

\- "I'm here Mr. Callen"- she said entering the room with a tray.

Kensi sensing the seriousness of her boss decided that that was the perfect moment to go out the room.

\- "Hello Hetty, see you later Callen, hum… get well!"- she felt guilt for leaving him alone in the face of danger seeing his imploring eyes, although she ran out as fast as she could.

\- "Hetty…"- started Callen.

\- "No, Mr. Callen, don't say anything. More than fifty dissolvable intradermal stitches on your shoulder, your blood pressure so low that it took two bags of saline wide open to get you back to a normal level, and when finally you stabilized you pulled out the damn IV and started the Third World War. As your colleagues remind me one thousand times yesterday there're legal implications that prevented you to be in a hospital, but this doesn't mean that you're fit to work in the field or even in the office."- Hetty was ready for an explosion of rage, her hand on the pocket of her jacket with the handcuffs ready.

G sighed.

\- "You're right. I'm not ok."- said G closing his eyes.

Alarmed Hetty touched his face, his forehead a little warm.

\- "Do you feel any pain?"

\- "No, not now, but it was bad Hetty."- a chill ran through his body remembering the torture when Anna cleaned his wounds in the motel not so long ago. He barely could suppress a tear thinking of Anna.

Hetty patted his short hair and held his hand, her walls completely down and her heart melted. That cheeky rascal was the only one able to do that to her.

\- "Why, Mr. Callen? You don't have to!"

G smiled. "Why?" The only question that Sam asked him and the question he wanted to ask to his team.

\- "Because we are getting closer than ever, we have the opportunity of finishing the most important mafia of the West Coast."

\- "You know what I mean Mr. Callen, keep that fancy discourse for the Secretary of Defense."

G remained silent for a moment, feeling the warmth of Hetty's little hand in his. Looking at her in the eyes, all sincerity, he answered.

\- "Because it's what we do."

Hetty held his gaze, understanding. Then, smiling, she turned and picked the gloves from the tray.

\- "Well, not today, I'm afraid. I'm going to change the bandage before the painkiller's effect subside and give you the antibiotic shot."

G groaned. He knew that overall it was a small price, but he hated needles!

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Sam was completely sunk into despair. He went out of the office grabbed his car and drove like a crazy, but when he arrived home he knew that he couldn't face the weight of silence and loneliness.

He stopped for a while trying to make sense at what had just happened. His best friend, his brother messing up with the most sacred thing he had in life. Why, why, why, why?!

The question was driving Sam crazy, he knew he needed to speak to someone. Someone with perspective; he changed his sport clothes for the ones in the truck and drove again. Before entering the zone he parked and walked around for more than an hour in the chilly night. From a bench on the park, he heard a voice calling:

\- "Roger! What are you doing here? I thought you were to going take some time off."

\- "Well my time off is over, Sargent Ben."

\- "You don't look happy, my friend."

\- "But you do, Sargent."

\- "I'm happy, yeah you can say that. Hey are you hungry? I have some pizza, a good one from the restaurant not from the bin."

\- "I'm ok, but thank you."

\- "It's beautiful here."- said the man looking around.

Sam looked too, but he didn't see anything special about the place. The neighborhood was quiet some buildings kept his lights randomly lit, the restaurants still open and people passed on their way home.

\- "What do you like about it?"

\- "It's safe and that's all I need."

\- "People need more things to live, Sargent Ben, and I'm not talking about stuff, I talk about love, respect, appreciation… that kind of things."

\- "Big words, Roger, big words. When you have nothing just to feel safe for some time feels great. Love… I had once a family, my bro, he did everything one minute before me: to be born, to graduate, to kiss a girl… when he died I thought that I had just one more minute to live, and I was ok with that, but I didn't die. With him gone I lost love, with time the appreciation of my colleagues and the day I lost the respect for myself I lost everything I had. Now I survive and that's ok. From time to time angels visit me and I'm happy."

\- "Angels?"- asked Sam.

\- "I like to call them that. People like your friend Carlson or the lovely lady that bought me the pizza tonight."

\- "Carlson is using you."

\- "You talked about appreciation and respect; the day I met Carlson he gave me that with his first handshake and one hard night full of demons he was there and he hugged me. It was the first time in fifteen years that someone hugged me. I don't care if you think that he is using me, he treats me as a person and I've forgotten what is like. I'm just happy and you can't take that away from me."


	60. Chapter 60

A.N.: I can't believe we've reached the chapter 60! I don't know how to thank you for being there reading and reviewing, supporting me and bearing with my crazy muse who is still in good shape :)

Chapter 60

Once the effect of the strong painkiller went down, Callen started to feel restless. He had too much work to do and he was losing time but he reckoned that at this point he was in Hetty's hands and he was confined in the house with one operation to put together.

He was also worried about Sam, he knew his friend was suffering and that probably he'll be ruminating what had happened between them. He had gone too far with his kids without his consent, Sam was right he had no clue about what a family should be and he did everything wrong. He'd always been surprised by Sam's papa bear attitude, nobody touches his little ones, and he respected him more for that.

\- "Mr. Callen! What are you doing there?"- asked Hetty distressed by the sight of Callen on the last step of the ladder at the library.

\- "I was just looking for something to read!"

\- "And you didn't think about asking for it? What about your vertigo?"- she said watching attentively how he descended.

\- "I'm ok, Hetty, really! When are you setting me free?"- he asked going down the steps one by one starting with the right leg.

\- "You're staying here until you recover, your back, your knee, your eardrum… not even the cut you have in your eyebrow is completely closed yet."

\- "I'm fineeee!" – Complained G in the childlike tone he used when Hetty annoyed him with her attentions-"I need the computer and my phone, I have to listen to the interrogatories, I need Nell, please Hetty!"

\- "Come here and sit down"- she ordered touching G's forehead.

\- "No fever, really, I feel good. Hetty we need to act tomorrow. Let me explain you everything!"

\- "I haven't decided yet if you're still in charge. Behave for once, stay here and read your book. In one hour I'll give you the painkiller."

\- "No painkiller please! It doesn't hurt that bad and they make me dazed! I need to listen to the interrogations Hetty, I can do it from here and I promise I won't move!"

\- "We'll see, Mr. Callen, for now get some rest."- she said going out the library feeling G's despair and frustration. But she was still in shock for last day. She needed to make a decision, not before a whiskey or two.

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Deeks wasn't able to sleep that night. He couldn't get rid of the image of Callen's injures and what he said. Callen was not only covering his back during the operation, but giving him the credit for the detentions when he was the one who put in danger everything. He felt guilty and bad for him. It was terrible seeing him suffer like that and the only thing he could do, even if he disagreed, was to convince Hetty for letting him in front of the operation.

He was tired, he needed to be with Kensi, at home, but he understood when she decided to stay with Callen. Hetty didn't seem to be in a good shape and Callen could use a friend, that's for sure.

When he met his men they confirmed the information about the weapons, another L.A.P.D. informant was the third source. Deeks wasn't very convinced about the source, something was going on in his unit, but if they said that the cartel was behind the deal he needed to finish it as soon as possible.

Picking the phone he updated Nell.

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Hetty opened the library door like a bullfighter who expects a fighting bull. But Callen was sat still reading and apparently calmed.

\- "So you have my sentence."- said G serious, resigned, sad.

\- "To have a sentence I need to judge first. It won't be fair to do it without listening to you."

G sensed he had still a possibility and he will fight to grab this new opportunity. Once he finished exposing his plan, Hetty agreed in going on with the execution.

\- "Nevertheless this is your last chance Mr. Callen. You can't go to the field, your time of work will be limited and you're not putting in jeopardy your health."

\- "Don't worry Hetty if this is going as planned the whole operation will be over very soon."

\- "I want Sam out of this until I decide a penalty."

\- "What? Why? No, please, Hetty, you don't understand, he needs to be there, if you take him off he'll be desperate!"

\- "Mr. Callen he attacked you!"

\- "I provoked him, it was my fault, if you need to punish someone I'm the one to blame, really, please, I'm the only aggressor, Sam was defending his family, please, you punish me!" – G exploded his eyes imploring with tears that didn't fell down.

Hetty was totally taken aback for G's words. He perceived the whole situation like a punishment and he wanted to protect his friend from that. He was hurt and so distressed that she knew that only one thing would calm him.

\- "I'm not punishing anyone, Mr. Callen, this is not about blaming or paying for some kind of sin, this is about safety, your safety."

\- "Sam won't hurt me, I know him! Please, let me finish this damn thing and then you can have my head."

\- "The only way I want your head is on your shoulders and without stitches or fever or whatever! Listen to me, this operation can't last any longer. I give a damn about Washington or the Molina cartel. Tomorrow you have the last opportunity to finish with that situation and then we talk about the team, but if your plan fails you'll be the one stopping this."

\- "You have my word."

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Late that afternoon everything was ready for the meeting with the coordinators.

\- "Callen"

\- "Hi Nell"

\- "You're on-line now, can you see us?"

\- "Yes it's perfect, thank you."

Everybody was sat on a long table and Nell had put the screen at the head creating the impression, for the people in the room and for Callen in Hetty's library, that Callen was in fact there. Simple and clever.

\- "Good afternoon everyone. First of all I want to apologize for the meeting at this ungodly hour, I know that you're tired and you are willing to come back home."

\- "Yes, Callen, it's already difficult to do the meeting in the morning but at this time ... I don't know how do you do with your family man!" - said the coordinator of the D.E.A.

\- "Duly noted, Connor, I can continue to apologize or I can get straight to the point and you can come back home" - Deeks and Nell exchanged stares knowing that the subject was a sensitive one for Callen.

\- "As Nell Jones probably told you we are pretty sure of where Julio Molina could be tomorrow between 19h and 21h. Apparently he had diner once a month in a little Mexican cantina in the 8th St."

\- "Is the source reliable, Callen?"- asked Talia del Campo.

\- "We have two sources, one of the detainees confessed and the information was confirmed by one of the men of the first unit that briefed Sam Hanna. We can't be one hundred per cent sure, but we have a good possibility and that's all I need to act."

A murmur of excitement ran between the presents. The perspective of a movement forward after several days of inactivity seemed great.

\- "How do you want to operate? I can send my unit right know and wait for him!"- said Talia.

\- "My unit is near the area, we'll take him"- affirmed the C.I.A.'s guy.

\- "What if we send a task force?" proposed Murphy from N.C.I.S.

\- "No, no, no. They are waiting for us to do a false move. The units must stay in their zones, they are watching and we can let them suspect that something is going on. The idea is to send just one person, a sniper and take down the man from the roof of a building some blocks away. There're is a police station in the area, L.A.P.D. can make the detentions later if Julio Molina is not alone."

\- "Then we'll take the lead, we have pretty good shooters."- said the C.I.A. coordinator.

But Callen cut him off:

\- "I want Kensi Blye in that building."

\- "Why her? she is not even team leader!"

\- "Because she is the best and pretty good is not enough."

\- "Who is having here back? her unit will be on the other side of the city"- asked Deeks worried.

\- "I'll send Sam, she will be fine"- reassured Callen.

Nell smiled at Deeks, Kensi wouldn't be alone. Deeks took the floor to explain the operation in parallel. His unit would jump to the new zone to prevent the cartel from doing an apparently important weapon exchange.

\- "Why L.A.P.D. if we're closer? Asked Curtis for the D.E.A.

\- "Because is my unit who confirmed the information"- asked Deeks, thinking that in fact he had just the word of a cop and the word of a terrorist.

Callen picked up the threat:

\- "Ladies, gentlemen, I'm aware of the fact that this is hard, that everybody is tired because it seems to be and endless operation, but tomorrow we have a great opportunity of giving a death blow to the Molina cartel; I'm asking you for a little bit of patience. Please go and have some rest."

People started to get up of their seats and to leave the room.

Callen called from the screen:

\- "Hey Deeks!"

\- "Hey"- he noticed that Callen had recovered some color.

\- "Are you sure about the operation?"- Callen was full of doubts.

\- "Yes, I'am."

\- "All right, then. But wait my order to act, I don't want one operation to interfere with the other"- he paused not convinced at all. – "By the way I own you a big one. Thank you." - said G looking at him in the eyes.

\- "No man, thanks to you; the day this shit finish beer is on me."

Callen chuckled.

\- "I'll hold you to that."

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That night Callen couldn't sleep. Nell had passed him the files with the interrogatories and he was more than interested to know what the driver had to say. The man was talking full of fear, in fact he was so nervous that he didn't stop talking for hours. Isolation could do that to people, the man had lost his mind, thought Callen. The transcriptions were just a confusing nonsense. However a phrase intrigued Callen:

\- "The city is a chess board full of whims."

\- "What do you mean?"- was the question asked by the interrogator.

\- "The fabric is a sample."

He noted mentally to ask Nell about it first thing in the morning. Because tomorrow will be his D-day.


	61. Chapter 61

A.N.: Are you ready? another one! Thank you so much for your encouragements :)

Chapter 61

With Hetty's consent Callen went to the Spanish mission early. The pain wasn't so bad if he didn't force his back, his vertigo seemed to be in control and he, definitely, was feeling better, even overexcited about the operations. Everything seemed to be in order, each detail controlled, it was a simple plan with the best people to accomplish it, but he couldn't help an odd feeling. Pushing the dark clouds out of his mind he took the black phone off his pocket. He thought for a while about what he was about to do, his brain was telling him to stop, nevertheless his heart won the battle.

\- "U.C. to Banana do u copy? Two days of silence is suspicious. "

\- "I'm studying."

\- "What?"

\- "The economic crisis in the inter-war period."

\- "Sounds boring."

\- "Yeah."

\- "Need help?"

\- "Need time."

\- "Ok, pause is over!"

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When Sam received Eric's call he sighed relieved. A real mission, something concrete covering Kensi's back. Lately he felt like he had reached his limit, his entire world upside down. All he always had was his family and without Michelle and the kids he counted on his brother, who seemed to be more absorbed by the damn mission than worried about his friends. Something wasn't right with G, he recognized him on Sargent Ben's words, human, compassionate and generous, but why he was acting like that with everyone but with his friends? He was sorry for punching him, he overreacted, and even if he really wanted to kill him he knew that what he did wasn't right. Nobody touches his kids, not even G. Even if he succeeded at convincing the director of the academy of Aiden's innocence and he will be able to continue his studies without a blemish on his record, his son was ballistic and wouldn't talk to him, not even a word; he guessed G probably was also angry and confused. It was all he could remember, G's blue stare full of pain and confusion.

Sat on a bench in a park Sam was more than tired of being in the street, maybe that operation would be the last one, because he was dreaming about a hot diner, a bath and clean sheets. And Callen, of course, he needed to talk to G even if he had to tie him to a chair.

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Since Kensi saw that it was Nell calling her she knew that something big was about to happen. Sniper mission with Sam as back up. Good. Time to get things done and to come back to normality. She needed to spend time with Deeks and, of course, the first thing she was planning to do is to sit Callen and Sam in the big couch, aim her weapon to their chests until they solved their differences. Boys, why are they soooo complicated? She passed the hours previous to the big moment on the armory cleaning her rifle and dreaming on a sunny day.

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Nell was more than ready. Concentrated on the tasks, she had already reviewed the protocol with every unit but Deeks' who seemed to have some issues with the communication devices. She wanted to give them some time to take positions before his operation start, but now it was Kensi's turn. In some hours everything would be over.

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\- "I'm the king of ops!"- Eric was rolling on his chair from one side to other on the space.

He had put a sweater around his neck simulating a cape and he seemed confident and happy. Kensi was getting ready, Sam and the team in position, Nell on the other side of the line, and he can feel the end of the nightmare.

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Callen was downstairs on his desk, he just talked to Kensi who was already in place at the roof of the building opposite the restaurant. The moment she'd confirmed Julio Molina's death he'll give the green light to Deeks. Something was eating him since last day, something the driver said didn't make any sense in English. That was it, Spanish, not English! All of a sudden he understood and a cold sweat ran on his back. As fast as he could he picked the tablet and went to ops.

\- "Eric, where is Deeks? I can't see any GPS from his unit on the screen."

\- "Let me check… I got Deeks! he is in Avery St."

\- "Damn it! I told him to wait! Where exactly? I need his location and to know what's there."

\- "It's a little street, there're some warehouses and an old factory. Deeks is moving to the factory."

\- "Show me the all the cameras in the zone. Thanks. What the hell…?" Callen touched the interphone changing the frequency- "Deeks! Deeks!"- nobody answered. "Connect with him Eric, quick!"

\- "He has not an earpiece, I can't, Callen."

\- "Nell!"- shouted Callen at the interphone.

\- "Yes Callen?"

\- "Connect me with Deeks, it's urgent!"

\- "I can't Callen he's not plugged."

\- "WTF? Ok, put me with the leader of unit one, now!"

\- "She is not answering."- Nell was now nervous.

\- "Nell, Eric! put me in contact with someone in the L.A.P.D. operation, c'mon guys!"

\- "I... I can't Callen. They have disconnected the earpieces."

\- "Then turn them on!"- cried G.

\- "What's happening?"

\- "It's a trap! we need to take Deeks out of there. Eric a plan of the factory. Now."

It was an old brick and wooden building, open space floors with wooden columns each five meters. At the exterior there were emergency exits in each floor with metallic ladders N.Y. style.

\- "How do you know Callen? it's the easiest operation of today."- asked Nell.

\- "The driver said it! The transcription was a translation full of mistakes! "Fabric" is a bad translation, "fábrica" means factory in Spanish and if you listen to what the man said he talked about "trampantojo", not an "antojo" a "whim", literally he said the city is a chess board full of tricks for the eye and he warns about a factory."

\- "I don't understand what you're talking about. A translation? Anyway that's a long shot Callen."- said Nell who in fact was more than worried.

\- "I don't care if I'm wrong, Nell, I'm not risking anyone's life. I need Deeks on line now!"-

On the screen they saw the L.A.P.D. team advancing to the building. Deeks seemed to be trying to stop his men, at the call two of them stopped and went out of the building but Deeks continued advancing in an attempt to stop the other two.

\- "Ok, I need all the images you can get of the factory. Now Eric!"

Eric divided the big screen in ops in a grid with several images, the street, the interior of the building from some different angles, the traffic in the street, the building opposite, the central one belonged to Deeks' button camera. He was going up the stairs, the mezzanine, the first floor, the second one. He was still following his men.

Out of the corner of his eye Callen saw it. Explosives. A wire in the side door at the first floor emergency exit.

\- "We need to take Deeks out; c'mon! The building is going to explode! ok, Nell put me with Kens now!"

\- "Callen… she is about to…"

\- "Do it!"- he shouted- "Eric, images." - They saw Kensi in the roof of the building getting ready to shot.

\- "Audio." – commanded G.


	62. Chapter 62

A.N.: Sorry for the cliffhanger and thank you as always for your enthusiasm :)

Chapter 62

Kensi was breathing rhythmically, his finger resting on the trigger, she had his objective aimed and she was ready. She never failed. The operation would be nearly over if she made the shot; Julio Molina. A big victory, the biggest ever against the cartel.

\- "On line, Callen."- said Eric.

\- "Kens!" – cried G.

She nearly jumped, startled.

\- "Listen to me, I need you to contact Deeks. Now."

\- "Callen! I was about..."

\- "Kens!"

The urgency of G's tone made Kensi react. Through the camera on the screen Callen an Eric saw her touching her ear changing simply the frequency.

\- "Eric, use Kensi's earpiece to contact with Deeks."

\- "I need some minutes."

\- "We don't have minutes! –touching the button of the intercom he said: "Kens! say Deeks to get out of there. It's a trap! He needs to take the team out now."

\- "Deeks! get out! It's a trap!"- she shouted.

On the other grid of the screen they saw Deeks touching his ear and to pass a message on a radio. Then he moved forward; he was advancing to the side door.

\- "Kens, repeat what I'm going to say: wire side door. Sniper, automatic, at your ten."

\- "Oh gosh Callen!"

\- "Kens, repeat!"

The screen showed Deeks moving his head checking the information and shooting at his ten. A man fell. Eric finally could put the audio on, but the sound didn't match with the image that was going some seconds delayed.

\- "We can hear the unit, but they can't hear us, Callen."

\- "Jack, back, now! The side door is wired!"- they heard Deeks' voice.

Too late. A sudden explosion killed the policeman and sent a ball of fire towards Deeks who had barely the time to cover his face from the flames. Callen and Eric could see some shadows at the other side of the curtain of smoke and fire.

\- "Kens! To the ground, now!"

She repeated the message just when the bullets started to fly and the only thing they could hear were cries. Eric parted the image and zoomed in one area; a dead body. One of them.

\- "Deeks, Deeks! oh God Deeks!"- cried Kensi.

\- "Kens, listen to me, he is ok, I can see him, but I need you to focus, tell him to crawl to his three, five meters.

\- "Eric zoom in camera four."

Kensi repeated the instruction and they saw Deeks moving, barely a shadow in the screen because of the black smoke. Deeks couldn't see anything, but in ops they have images of the other side of the space. Callen heard a cry and then he saw Deeks in the screen touching something in the floor and stopping.

\- "Kens! told him to go on."

\- "There's fire Kensi! I'm trapped!"- they heard Deeks screaming.

\- "Deeks go on!"- he can't he is blocked by the fire. Oh Callen! take him out of there!"

\- "Trust me Kens, told him to go on three more meters to his right. There's a wooden column he can't be hit there!"

The shooter started to fire again and Deeks was alone trapped between the bullets and the fire. They can see Deeks trying to figure out where the shooter was. He rather fought him than die burned.

\- "Callen... there's fire he can't advance."

\- "Yes he can, the flames are small, tell him to go now! Just three meters. The shooter is at his eleven"- c'mon Deeks, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon.

Eric was terrified, he tried to clear the image of each camera in an attempt to give Callen a better vision of what was going on. Another shadow. A member of the cartel was cutting the access to the balcony door. They saw Deeks moving following Callen's instructions. He was coughing sat on the floor, his back against the column as the bullets ricocheted in all directions. They were three options to go out the building: the stairs probably guarded by members of the cartel, the emergency door with external metallic ladders to the floor just some meters at the other side of the column where Deeks was hiding, or the closed windows with iron bars on the other side of the room. Deeks was blinded by the smoke and he didn't have a clue of what it was merely one meter in front of him. The tension was so intense that Eric was under the impression of being at Deeks side surrounded by flames and bullets.

\- "Eric, I need images of the back alley. Now."- In spite of the tension G was keeping his cool, the adrenaline acting enhancing his senses.

Another pop out window appeared on the right hand side of the screen and Callen made his decision.

\- "Nell I need you to send ambulances and L.A.P.D. to the address."

\- "But you said... our cover ..."

\- "Nell!"

\- "Kens, listen to me carefully. Tell Deeks not to think, not to worry, he just need to do what I'm going to tell you the moment I tell you. I can see him, Kens, but you're the only one who can talk to him."

Kensi repeated Callen's words. She was on her knees, still on the roof, the rifle lying, inane. She had passed in seconds from glory to hell.

\- "Up; to your three, ten meters. Go now. Down. Stop."

The bullets flew each time closer to Deeks who was barely covered by the column. In front of him a wall of fire at his sides and behind him shooters.

\- "Eric, screen six, zoom; on the stairs appeared some armed men dressed in jeans and black sweats. Unit two is here!"- said Eric. Nell, confirmed. But something on their way of moving told Callen the contrary.

Deeks protection was about to disappear. The bullets made cheap wood shatter and Deeks cried when the one piece hurt him. He was coughing and trying to get some air to his lungs.

\- "Callen!" - shouted Kensi – "he's hurt! he needs to move!"

\- "Eric! The satellite images and the sound, do you remember? are you sure about the two seconds interval?" - Callen asked.

\- "One hundred per cent."

\- "Not yet Kensi."

\- "Callen!"

\- "At my three repeat: creep thought the flames there's another column ahead at his twelve.

\- "One, two three! Eric and Callen saw Deeks moving, the delay between the order and his moving was of nearly six seconds. Two much, he thought; I need to anticipate or he's not going to make it.

He saw Eric looking at him with tears in the eyes, he didn't realize that he had verbalized his thoughts.

\- "Nell the ambulance!"

\- "Confirmed Callen it arrives in two minutes! The backup is there!" - she shouted.

\- "Kens, tell Deeks to put his camera on the column I need to see the South side."

\- "But Callen, you're going to lose visual contact with him"- said Nell.

\- "I know."

Some seconds after another blurry image appeared; a shooter in a place that Callen thought it was free of danger. The fire was advancing, the smoke was more intense and the shooter had Deeks cornered. G knew that if he didn't get Deeks out of the hell in the next minute he'll die. He heard six bullets, the semiautomatic the member of the cartel was using had ten. Ok, the shooter needed to reload. Callen counted.

\- "Kens!"- Callen shouted- "Tell him to run and jump to the second window on his right at his two; do you copy? second window at his two right behind the flames. He can't see it, he must trust, Kens!"

\- "Copy that!" - she was crying.

\- "Ready Kens...- Callen counted again- Now!"

In ops Eric and G held their breath. Callen counted the seconds, three, four, five, six... the camera on the interior or the building as well as Deeks' one showed just black smoke. C'mon Deeks! seven, eight, C'mon! nine, ten, eleven... no, no, no c'mon! Oh God, please! C'mon! twenty five, twenty six…

\- "Callen!"- Kensi was desperate. They saw Sam approaching, securing the weapon and hugging her. Eric was crying calling Nell.

Just when Callen was already thinking the worse, they saw something flying thought the second window in an explosion of glasses, debris and flames.

The fall was huge. Deeks body laid on the floor without moving.

\- "Callen! Callen!"- shouted Kensi crying.- "Deeks! You're ok? Deeks!"

\- "He's out Kens"- he said in low voice-"you did great, you lead him to the exit."

\- "Why is he not answering? Callen!"

\- "Talk to him, Kens, even if he doesn't answer. Don't let him go."

G couldn't stand it anymore. If Deeks died it was entirely his fault.

Eric zoomed with the exterior camera. Deeks was in an awkward posture unconscious, a pool of blood was forming under his head and a cop just kneeled at his side. They could hear the sirens of the ambulance approaching.

Callen run out of ops, his cellphone vibrating hysterically on his pocket. He needed to get out, to hell with everything!

Please, Deeks, be ok, please, be ok, be ok, be ok, be ok...


	63. Chapter 63

A.N.: I know, I know I did it again. Thank you so much for your encouragements and nice comments that are really appreciated :) I let you with a new one:

Chapter 63

Finding a place to park near the hospital was just impossible so G drop the car in a parking lot ten blocks away. It was starting to rain and a cold breeze came directly from the ocean. Callen knew that he had just lost not only Deeks, but the game against the Molina cartel and his freedom. That was the deal with Washington: his head in exchange of Hetty and Nell's; running as fast as he could on the busy street he reckoned that he didn't care, the only thing he cared about was Deeks' life. Nearly one minute, he had miscalculated everything and if something happened to him it was entirely his fault. Kensi... he couldn't even think about what he'd done to her. Now thinking about it, getting her involved to contact Deeks was the cruelest thing he could have done, and he never forgave himself for that.

When he arrived at the hospital he was soaking wet and hurting all over even if he didn't registered the pain; the noise of the sirens at the emergency entrance was too loud and when he finally arrived at the reception and asked about Deeks he couldn't hear the answer. The hall was busy, people crying, talking, moving, it was like being surrounded by an incomprehensible chaos completely alien. People and noise made him dizzy. He needed to find Deeks. Trying to walk against the crowd in the ER's corridor was difficult, doctors running, nurses pushing a gurney with a man crying made him to nearly fall and he leaned against the wall looking for support. He touched his ear and closed his eyes just trying to breath. He felt a touch in his arm.

\- "Sir, sir, are you ok?"

He didn't have time for that. Then he saw Sam, just in front of him at the end of the corridor; getting rid of the arm that supported him he followed his friend who went to the stairs. Callen tried to advance fast, one, two floors up, he hadn't have strength to call him so he followed his path to another corridor, less busy, less noisy. He was afraid, of knowing of not knowing, he only needed to hug Kensi, to ask her to forgive him to tell her that he tried... the door of the waiting room was open. Kensi was sat on a plastic chair with Nell's arm around her shoulders; Sam who was just some steps ahead G, handle her a bottle of water. They all turned when G arrived looking like a punch-drunk boxer after a combat.

\- "Kens" - he called softly.

Kensi stood up and looked at him with her eyes full of tears. He had never seen her like that, he only wanted to hug her, to comfort her to tell her that he will be there no matter what.

\- "Leave me alone! How could you…? you told me he was ok, Callen! This wasn't supposed to happen… all this shit is your fault!

She crossed her arms and turned away seeking solace in Sam's arms. Sam hugged her and stared at G denying with his head, with his eyes he told him to go, but he couldn't move, frozen by Kensi's words. She was right, it was his fault for not checking the information before, for not doing the interrogations himself, for delegate his work on others, for not getting Deeks out of the hell in time. A doctor entered, the words concussion, lack of oxygen, intubated, broken fibula, operation... G only could think that Deeks was alive, he was alive and there was hope. A wave of dizziness caught him by surprise and he leaned once more against the wall. The doctor went out crossing his path with Hetty that arrived followed by the help G had asked her some weeks ago: Nate. Nell jumped into his arms and Hetty went to Kensi who was still under Sam's protective wing.

Overwhelmed in his corner, unable to breath G sneaked out the room. He needed to go out, to have some fresh air. He was shaking, disoriented, the stairs moving under his feet, someone pushed him, he stumbled. The noise too loud, the spinning too fast, the world suddenly hazy and then black.

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Hetty was taken aback for the circumstances. Callen told her the operation was an easy one, just a sniper, Kensi with Sam backing her up. And suddenly Deeks seriously injured and the team grieving again. Why they can't have a rest? This situation was her fault, she should have stopped Callen when she could, he clearly was in no condition of leading an operation of such caliber and his team was paying the consequences. The only thing he did right was insisting on getting Nate back. First thing the moment they have more news about Deeks would be to prepare Callen's resignation and to come back to Washington to assume the consequences for his acts.

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Nate was appalled. He knew of course about the circumstances of Michelle's death and Hetty told him about the cartel, the pressure from Washington, and Callen's insistent and unexpected request for his help, but he didn't expect to arrive in the middle of that drama. The doctor had just gone, Deeks prognosis was guarded, his unstable condition was due to smoke inhalation, but the rest of his injuries were not life challenging. A broken leg, some first grade burns and splinters, a cut above his right ear and a slight concussion. The doctors had put him in a ventilator to help his body to oxygenate because his CO2 levels in blood were too high: They didn't know for how long his brain was deprived of oxygen due to the fact that he was unconscious the moment the ambulance arrived. The next 24 - 48 hours would be decisive to see his evolution.

Nate found the team devastated, Kensi was unable to talk, Nell was seeking for comfort, and his saw tears in Sam's eyes. Eric called several times, he was holding the fort in ops. But where was Callen? He saw him just for a second in the corner near the door and then he disappeared. That was weird. But he had things to do first.

\- "Nell, would you come with me please?"

Nell looked at him, Nate read in her stare that she didn't want to go, and he found an excuse quickly.

\- "I'm going to the cafeteria before it closes and I won't be able to bring everything by myself"

Reluctantly Nell got up and followed him. In the elevator Nate asked softly:

\- "What happened today Nell?"

\- "There was an operation, an easy one, Deeks' unit..."

\- "Wait, what do you mean by Deeks' unit?"

\- "Deeks was working with L.A.P.D."

\- "But you were aware of the operation..."

\- "Yeah, of course, I was coordinating the units, one operation would follow the other one, but Deeks started before Kensi."

\- "So if I understand well N.C.I.S. and L.A.P.D. are working together."

\- "And the C.I.A. and the D.E.A as well."

\- "Wow, that is a first! and you're coordinating everything..."

\- "Well, yes."

\- "That's impressive Nell; you must be proud that Hetty put you in charge."

Nell's face went somber.

\- "It was Callen who wanted me there, not my choice, believe me."

\- "Callen? giving you the control? that's another first. He must really trust you, then."

Nell said nothing, thinking about what Nate just said while he commanded sandwiches and bottles of water.

\- "And today? two operations?"- asked Nate.

\- "Yeah, Kensi was supposed to shoot one of the cartel big fishes, she was at the roof of the building in front of the target it was an easy shot. Deeks was near little Tokyo, his mission was to stop a deal, an exchange of weapons, not a big one, something easy.

\- "Something easy that went wrong. That happens. Well, at least one of the operations went ok didn't it?"

\- "No, Nate, you don't understand, we couldn't contact Deeks and Callen stopped Kensi just to stop Deeks."

\- "I see, he knew they would be in touch. That's bad."

\- "Really bad. What do you think it will happen now?"

\- "In fact you're the one who has the information to answer that question, Nell. I can't tell you about the operation or about what will happen, but you know that I'm here for you and if you need to talk, I'm all ears."

\- "Thank you Nate."

\- "Let's go upstairs. So a cartel…"

\- "The Molina cartel"

\- "Holy crap!"

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A bright light, a shadow, again the light hurting his eyes. A penlight.

\- "Pretty eyes welcome back"- said a nurse checking his pulse and noting his reads in a chart.

G looked around completely disoriented and worn out; damn it, the hospital. He tried to sit up, but a hand in his chest prevented him from moving.

\- "Don't try to move or you'll pass out again, your blood pressure is very low and you need to lay down; what's your name?"

G didn't answer; he closed his eyes and tried to focus. He was cold and even if he had his jeans and boots on his shirt was missing. Still in ER he deduced.

\- "Do you want me to call your family? any friend or someone special?"

Callen couldn't prevent the tears from forming in his eyes. He had no right to call anyone, he was the reason of their pain, Deeks… it was his fault, he had earned to be alone... the hand of the nurse patting his arm, this little human touch was more than he deserved.

\- "It's ok, handsome, I understand. Too many questions, rest now. I'll tell the doctor you're back. Rest now."

Once the nurse went out of the box he tried again to move, but the haze came back. He understood that his body needed time; he read the monitor, yeah, he was low, low and in pain, no painkillers, that was the good news. For now. A cuff in his right arm, the oximeter in his finger, again an IV on his left arm and the chest full of electrodes. Unable to move or doing anything he curled on the gurney and closing his eyes he dozed. He was so cold…


	64. Chapter 64

A.N.: As always thank you :)

Chapter 64

\- "Kensi, dear, don't you think it's time to phone Mr. Deeks' mother?"- asked Hetty.

\- "I don't know Hetty, really, I don't think he would like that, her mother is in a road trip and she can be… how could I say…"- Kensi was overwhelmed unable to think. She positively knew that Deeks wouldn't want her mum there, but if something happen she wouldn't forgive herself.

\- "Hetty, we can wait until the next doctor's visit."- said Nate wanting to take some pressure off Kensi.

Since his arrival Nate had managed to send Nell home, and after several conversations and reassurances he managed to do the same with Eric, but he knew that with Sam and Hetty wouldn't be possible. With the excuse of going to the toilet he phoned Callen, wondering again why he wasn't there with his team. Not even answering machine. Something was going on and he was ready to get to the bottom of it.

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A pinch in his ear made Callen jump. He cursed internally for not having been able to remain fully awake.

\- "I'm Doctor Wilson, how do you feel Mr….?"- asked a man on his fifties reading the chart and the monitor.

Callen didn't want to answer, but he knew that probably they had already checked his wallet and anyway without identification the doctor would follow the standard procedure and took his fingerprints. With that it was just matter of time that Hetty discovered he was there. But he also knew that one question would lead to another one and he didn't want to add problems to his already too long list.

\- "Carlson." – his voice sounded weaker than he pretended.

\- "Do you remember what happen to you Mr. Carlson?"

Callen just closed his eyes; he didn't even need to fake a headache.

\- "I see. The light is bothering you. Headache?"

G just nodded. He felt so tired and cold, he just wanted to sleep, even better, to disappear.

\- "I'm going to order a sedative, we need to take care of your shoulder and then we'll try to find a room for you. Your electrolyte balance is better but not optimal and your levels are very low. I would like to keep you in observation for some days. Do you want us to call someone for you?"

\- "Not yet, thank you."

\- "Mr. Carlson, you have nothing to worry about. I'm going to send nurse Holland and I'll be back in a minute."

No time to lose. The moment the doctor went out of the curtain G took the needle out of his vein and biting his lower lip inserted it again under the skin covering it with the surgical tape, then he rolled on his stomach just one second before the nurse entered with the syringe.

\- "Hi sweetheart. Finally the doctor authorized to give you something for the pain, you'll feel better in no time"- No wanting to disturb G's position she injected the sedative in the saline bag as Callen had guessed.

\- "Thanks"

\- "You talk! Good to know, but for now just relax. You'll feel like floating in some minutes, try to sleep and when you wake up the worst will be over."

\- "Thank you, really"- he said.

G was sincerely grateful to that nurse and wondered for a second how there could be such nice people in the world. Now he tried to breathe rhythmically and to calm down, he needed the heart monitor to register a lower rhythm to make them believe that the sedative was working. The doctor came back and the torture began, just the saline on the raw flesh was excruciating. G pretended to be sleeping, but soon he realized that no matter what the pain was making his heart accelerate. He moved in a way that made the electrode he had in his chest to fall. The nurse realized it.

\- "The heart monitor. He must have dislodged the electrode. Do you want me to put it again, doctor?"

\- "Not now, I rather finish debriding the wound. It seems like he had quite an accident some days ago and he had received treatment, look at this stitches, very professional, but this shoulder needs daily care and all these cuts could still get easily infected. I wonder if he is in antibiotics."

\- "Have you seen these scars? Do you think they are…?"

\- "Bullets? No way. Nobody survives five shots in the torso. Could you please find a silicone pad? It will protect the wound and help to keep it hydrated."

When some minutes later Callen was thinking he couldn't stand the pain anymore, the doctor stopped.

\- "He is shaking. I don't know why it's always that cold in E.R.!"- he said as he put over Callen's shoulder the thick silicone burn pad and a big adhesive gauze covering it.

\- "I'm going to look for a blanket, it would be a while before they find a bed upstairs."

The doctor's beeper called and he went away to attend another case. G knew he had barely two minutes before the nurse came back, so, in spite of the weakness, he stood up carefully, took off the needle of his arm, the rest of electrodes and the stuff that kept him trapped and looked around for his shirt, wallet and keys, that were nowhere to be found. No time! He covered himself with the white pad of the gurney and pushed the curtain that divided his box from another one. An old sleeping woman laid there alone, but her dress was out of consideration. Then he heard the sirens, the voices, the chaos of people running. Probably an accident. He took advantage of the situation and went to the corridor. Nobody cared about him. Some doors away he found the doctors' locker room and inside a pile of neatly folded blue V-neck pajama shirts. Perfect. Without losing time he went to the street crossing the ER's main door, not before seeing out of the corner of his eye the wonderful nurse Holland with a blanket in her hands looking for him.

The sun began to make its appearance on the horizon and the black of the night started to dilute with its first lights. G was cold, his shoulder stung, as well as the place where the IV was, but above all he was sad, and the fact of knowing that his days of freedom were about to finish didn't improve his mood. He couldn't go rogue, he had given his word to the Secretary of Defense that he'll pay for Hetty and Nell if the operation failed. Once in prison he had two choices: trying to go out and live the rest of his life as a fugitive or simply get himself killed. Not a bad idea, after all.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nate looked at the group in front of him. Hetty seemed tiny in the plastic chair, she kept her eyes closed and her breathing was rhythmical but Nate suspected she wasn't sleeping. Kensi was curled in an impossible posture over two chairs, using Sam's thigh as a pillow. She didn't talk much and he didn't want to force her, she was fighting so hard to keep cool! Sam's hand rested on Kensi's shoulder, he was alert, vigilant, but Nate could read the deep pain in his eyes, the impotence and loneliness, and once more time he wondered about Callen. A nurse passed and he went to ask her a favor. Usually he can be very persuasive; it was just this team, his team that could make him lower his walls.

\- "Kens, hey Kensi"- he called after his conversation with the nurse.

\- "What?! What happened? Deeks?!"- jumped Kens startled.

Automatically Sam and Hetty leaned on their chairs.

\- "Schhhh, don't worry, nothing bad happened. Here, put these on" –Nate handled a paper robe, covers for the shoes and a shower like, plastic hat.

\- "Why?"

\- "I got you five minutes with Deeks, I promised the nurse that you'll be out before the doctor come, so hurry!"

\- "Thank you Nate, thank you, thank you!" – she said getting ready in seconds.


	65. Chapter 65

A.N.: I'm really overwhelmed for your nice comments and your reactions to last chapters. You really make me happy for being there! I hope you like this one.

Chapter 65

G was freezing. The chilly dew became soon a continuing drizzle. The short sleeve pajama shirt he stole from the hospital wasn't enough to keep him warm, his knee was killing him and the ten blocks to the parking lot were more than a hard time.

Deeks barely hanging in there, the operation against the cartel failed, the Sudanese connection without confirmation, his team... well, not his team anymore, he was sure about that. He screwed up everything and the worse thing was that he didn't know how. Probably if he had another opportunity he would do exactly the same, because he was sure he did his best each time he had to make a decision. Maybe he could have been kinder or nicer, but definitely he wouldn't change anything; he needed to use the last hours he had in freedom to write a report of the operation and to put everything in order before the wolves of Washington claimed him.

No wallet no car keys, great, another reason for Hetty to kill him, but maybe it was about time, the moment he finished what he had to do he would need to reconsider his reasons to live. His half empty bottle was now the inexistent bottle.

By the time he arrived to the car he was shaking so hard that he needed to break the window in order to open it, and took him more than three minutes to bridge the contact. He put the heat on in an attempt to warm up and took the phones from the glove compartment.

Missing calls. Nate. Oh gosh Deeks! What if... trembling he dialed the number.

\- "Nate, you called me."

\- "Callen! are you ok?"

G was surprised, he expected a reproach or a complaint certainly not that question. Nate and his mind tricks.

\- "Been better, but thanks. Deeks?

\- "Intubated, oxygen 100%. Some burns in his hands though quite small and a broken leg that needs to be fixed. No swelling from the concussion. He is responding to the treatment, but it's still too soon to try to wake him up. The doctors don't want to give a prognosis yet. The next 48h will be decisive."

\- "The team? Hetty?...Kens?"

\- "You know, after Michelle, it's not easy."

Callen gulped… don't go there, don't go there, don't go there... he was in no shape to compete with Nate.

\- "I know" -he answered gulping again.

\- "Why don't you come to the hospital and check it by yourself? it would be good for all of you."

G laughed.

\- "I can't come back; please take care of them, they need you Nate"

\- "Callen!" called Nate but G had already hung up.

G closed the eyes for a moment and hugged himself still cold. The conversation with Nate had let him a renewed feeling of guilt. The little light on the burned phone caught his attention before his dark thoughts took possession of his soul.

A missing call from an unknown number. His first thought was Kamran, the little one, but then he realized that it was the week of exams, she was probably enclosed at the school and Sam wouldn't be at L.A. if something bad happened. Sargent Ben. Oh no! he forgot about the silent army he needed to cancel the operation right now.

The sun was hiding behind clouds that were getting darker and the rain were heavier as well as the traffic. An atypical Californian day. When G finally got out the Mercedes some blocks away from the area where Sargent Ben could be, all the calories from the car's heating vanished at once. No one was to be seen at the park where the Sargent used to be and his habitual corner was also empty. Callen ran completely wet to the back alley where he knew people from the Italian restaurant gave some free food.

\- "Gene"- he called at the sight of the former military.

Startled the man ran clumsily, but he wasn't able to jump the wall of the cul de sac.

\- "C'mon Gene! It's me Carlson I'm not going to hurt you, please!"

\- "Carlson?"

\- "Yeah man, c'mon, what's up?"

\- "It's bad Carlson, really bad."

\- "What happen? Where is Sargent Ben?"

\- "He did a bad thing, no, no, no, I can't tell you, you're a cop, I'm bad, I'm bad" - the homeless started to hit his head.

\- "Gene, Gene, please, calm down, I'm not a cop, and I'm here to help, no matter what. C'mon, sit down, ok, c'mon man, it will be ok, promised"

\- "Yesterday the guy at the restaurant...I can't tell you, I can't tell you, I'm bad!"

\- "Listen to me Gene, no matter what happened yesterday I'll protect you and the guys, is somebody hurt? Sargent Ben? Where is he? I can't help you if you don't tell me!"

\- "You promise?"

\- "I swear, man."

And Gene told him. All of a sudden G's world turned upside down and he sat at Gene's side wetting even more his pants with the mud of the ground. He forget about the cold and the pain, about his team and Deeks about everything, but Sargent Ben.

\- "Where is he?"- he asked softly.

\- "Dunno."

\- "Gene, I know that you know, you're trying to get a pizza for him; I'll get the pizza and then we're going to find him together. Don't worry, you did great, Gene, you did great."

With the head about to explode G only wanted to confirm the news. He couldn't think properly he just needed to see Sargent Ben. Proud with the pizza under his overcoat Gene led Callen through alleys, fences, waste lots and buildings in construction; when he finally arrived to the huge pipe where Sargent Ben was lying, he was completely wet, freezing and exhausted.

\- "Sargent Ben, I got you a pizza, a new one!"

The stinky bulge didn't move.

\- "Sargent it's from the restaurant and it's still hot!"

G sat down besides the bulge and touched the back of the man.

\- "C'mon Sargent, Gene get you a pizza and you don't want it? I think I'm hungry" - said Callen realizing than the man was probably drunk.

\- "Carlson! you come!" - the bulge moved and throw itself forward making Callen to touch the wall of the tube with his back. He couldn't help a moan from coming out of his mouth.

\- "I'm sorry for not being here before. I didn't know. How are you Sargent Ben?"

The veteran looked at G in the eyes and he could just read a sincere concern and pain.

\- "I didn't know what to do, Carlson. You tell me to take care of your man, Roger, and he never came back and I didn't know what to do."

\- "I know, it's ok, you don't have to worry about him anymore. Just tell me what happened. Everything you remember."

\- "I was in the street with Roger. He was listening something from a radio in his ear and he didn't listen to me. When the target was arriving Roger left running, he let me alone with the target! You told me it was important, you told me it was the mission, and Roger left me alone..."

The man started to rock forward and backwards, crying. G knew he had cried all night long and he felt bad for him. He was his responsibility and he had no right to do this to the poor man. He hugged him and let him cry for a while.

\- "Please Sargent, tell me what happened then"

\- "The target opened the back door of the car and I approached, he was smiling and I asked him for some change, before he could reach his pocket I..."

\- "What Sargent?"

\- "I killed him."

\- "Are you sure? I mean he could be just hurt or..."

Sargent Ben's eyes were focused and deadly serious. He put the hand on his pocket and took it off with a switchblade knife.

Callen's mind was racing.

The homeless pressed the button on the knife and instantaneously a huge triple blade full of dried blood came out.

G jumped and nodded understanding nobody could survive that. Sargent Ben was trembling but he managed to hide the blades again.

\- "You can tell the police, I know you're one of them."

\- "I'm not a cop, Sargent Ben, I'm just someone who can help you and right know we need to take you out of the streets. Do you trust me?" - G extended his hand and coming out the tube.

\- "I don't know why, but I do"- he went out and shake hands, then he picked the plastic bag that covered the pizza box and he put the weapon in his pocket again – "And you owed me a pizza"- he said signaling Gene who had eaten everything and was sleeping in another tube.

\- "I owe you much more than that Sargent, you just recovered my life."

\- "You're freezing Carlson"- the older man took off his dirty coat with the knife in the pocket and put it on G's shoulders.

\- "Thank you. For everything."

The game wasn't over after all.


	66. Chapter 66

A.N.: Back on the game with Callen ready to finish it. Thanks for reading and for your nice comments!

Chapter 66

\- "Hey baby, I know a part of you can hear me, please, I need you to come back to me."

Kensi's eyes danced from the monitor to the tube on Deek's throat, from there to the IV, like checking everything was working. Then she took a rebel lock off his forehead, his golden hair messier than usually. His chest was moving up and down, the respirator set the rhythm with a noise that she didn't know to hate or to love. Deeks' parlor contrasted with the red marks of the burns. His leg was slightly elevated and bandaged. How could this have happened?

\- "Deeks, please, if this is a joke or a spooky twist of fate, I got it, it's terrible to be at this side of the bed, and now I know how much you suffered, but you don't need to insist, really sweetheart I already learned the lesson. C'mon baby, what about the wedding plans and the beautiful ring you gave me? I need you to fight your way to me. I don't care about doctors, I don't care about diagnoses, I just care about you, about us."

She touched his face gently, then his arm, his chest. She knew his body by heart, always moving, always active, not like that hooked to machines without even breathing for himself. Tears escaped from her tired eyes. Why him, why now, why this stupid mission?

\- "Honey, listen to me, they are making questions about your mum and about your next of kin, I really don't know what to answer, so please, wake up, gave me just a little signal and I'll close their mouths."

A nurse entered in the I.C.U. surprised to find Kensi there.

\- "You need to get out of here."

\- "Please, he is my fiancé, we are getting married, please."

\- "I don't make the rules princess, you need to go out."

\- "Ten seconds, promised."

\- "Ten seconds"- the nurse went out.

\- "Hey baby, I would like to tell you how much I love you, but I can't find the words, so you just need to wake up and let me to show you. The words are so small when is the soul who wants to talk!"

\- "Ahem, ten seconds. Let me do my job, please."- insisted the nurse.

Kensi caressed once more time his hair and kissed Deeks in the forehead.

\- "I love you."

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When Callen finally arrived to the boatshed with Sargent Ben, both were completely exhausted. The ex-military was so afraid that he couldn't rationalize that Callen was there to protect him. If the way under the rain to get to the car was a challenge for G's injured knee and rib, the ride wasn't easy neither for the homeless, it was his first time in a Mercedes, he didn't understand why Callen hadn't the keys and he didn't want to ruin the upholstery because of his incontinence.

Once there G gave the man some clothes and showed him the shower and how it worked. Then prepared him a hot coffee and ordered the biggest pizza he could find as well as some groceries. Patiently he explained him that he was in a safe house and introduced him to the agent at the door in charge of his custody.

With no time to lose G went to ops, it was still early and nobody was there, he needed to check the veracity of Julio Molina's death and he needed first-hand information from the units on the streets.

First he read the last reports for the micro operations still working, nothing special on N.C.I.S. or D.E.A.'s side, he could read between the lines that their patience was nearly over. On the other hand L.A.P.D. units were out of the game with two mortal victims and two wounded men. It was a priority to know what had happened last day. Who gave the order to enter into the factory and why Deeks was there behind his men. He owed Kensi the truth, but he knew that L.A.P.D. corporatism would make the task nearly impossible. The only one in position of getting something clean was Nell, so he wrote a note on the file to let her know her next task.

The C.I.A. was still interrogating the suspects, but the last report was more nonsense. Was it so difficult to find a bilingual agent in a city like L.A.? Incredible. His next step would be to put some pressure to the driver.

Callen was still freezing and in pain, his kingdom for a shower and a hot tea, but not before he checked the street cameras for last day. With visual confirmation supporting Sargent Ben's declaration and the analysis of the murder weapon, the operation would be in its tracks again, all the legitimacy on his side. Focusing again he tried to review in his mind what had happened. He was in ops last day but he couldn't remember any image of Julio Molina, his attention was one hundred per cent on Deeks, he only recalled the camera on the roof where Kensi was, and the image of her desperation was something he couldn't ever erase from his mind. Usually Eric recorded everything so he hoped he did it yesterday. After eternal minutes checking painful videos from last afternoon Callen found the one he was looking for. The 8th street, a car that stopped just in front of the little Mexican restaurant, a man who opened the back door and Sargent Ben who advanced towards him; the man that put his hand on his pocket, Sargent Ben who leaned over him for a second and left at top speed, before the driver and another man travelling in the front seat realized what was going on. Julio Molina laid on a pool of his own blood. Callen stopped the image and zoomed, even without treating the image to avoid pixelation he could see death in the man's eyes. Before the crowd from the restaurant could react the two men of the cartel took the body and drove away full speed.

G shuddered when a chill ran over his back.

The door opened and a cry made Callen jump.

\- "Federal agent! freeze! hands where I can see them"- cried Eric.

Without turning G raised his hands.

\- "Eric it's me."

\- "Callen! what the hell...? you stink!"

\- "Yeah, sorry"- G took the jacket off, but the blue shirt wasn't in better shape either.

\- "Any news on Deeks?"

\- "He's still intubated; no changes since yesterday. Listen Eric, Julio Molina is dead. Look!"- G said signaling the screen- "I need you to make HD copies of the record and to analyze this." – He took the weapon off the jacket's pocket and put it on the table, startling even more Eric who was still standing near the door.

\- "The blood is presumably Julio's"- G continued - "The car, Eric, I need you to find that car, put kaleidoscope to work as soon as possible, and then help Nell with L.A.P.D. we need to know what happened to Deeks yesterday. Any questions?"

\- "Why are you wearing a doctor's pajama and a hobo rag?"

G smiled tiredly.

\- "Long story."- he said getting out of the room. Then, as Eric fussed with his arms trying to get rid of the disgusting smell, Callen added:

\- "Hey Beale, did I ever tell you how much I admire you? If Deeks is alive is because of you. I don't know how you can bear being here seeing everything and managing information under such a pressure. I'm proud of you man, you did a great job."

Before Eric could react G was already on the stairs.


	67. Chapter 67

A.N.: As tomorrow I'm celebrating an European version of Thanksgiving and I don't know if I will be able to post, here it goes, another one today ;) enjoy!

Chapter 67

G saw Hetty's missing calls on his phone. He didn't have time for her and her obsession for making him to stop. Not now, not yet. He was so close... Standing between the two screens installed downstairs he put the grid on the city map and displayed the position of the units and the movements between the joint force and the cartel. He drawn with his finger the new lines and when he finished he froze. The probabilities of taking down the cartel forever were huge he only needed to limit the area but he had a pretty good idea of where they could be hiding. It was the moment to concentrate on the main reason that had triggered the operation in the first place: the Sudanese connection and the safety of Sam and his kids, because he was more than sure, Khaled had passed the baton and he needed to stop the menace forever.

Suddenly a little light lit in the corner of the screen. It was the agent in the boatshed:

\- "Callen, Connor needs room for two detainees, what do you want me to do with your Sargent?"

Thinking for a second G gave him and address and the instructions to find the keys. Then he asked to speak to Ben and he explained everything to him in a way he could understand. The man was amazed by seeing Callen in a screen, but when he was about to cut the communication he read something in Sargent Ben's eyes, something he knew first hand.

\- "Hey Sargent, I know that it's hard to trust, but I swear you: you'll be safe there, you would be able to sleep."

\- "Thanks Carlson."

\- "No, thank you."

The open space started to be as crowded as always and he noticed that people were looking at him bizarrely. Then he remembered the stench. Damn it! He took a suit from Hetty's wardrobe and went to the shower. He was freezing, exhausted after another awful night, and everything hurt to the point he knew he couldn't function without painkillers. He didn't recognize the image the mirror gave back when he shaved in an attempt to mitigate the effect that the bruises, the cut, his red eyes with purple bags could provoke. Image was important to people and he needed to show he was ok. Fifteen minutes later he was on the garage "borrowing" one of Hetty's fancy cars and heading to the C.I.A. headquarters to interrogate the driver for himself.

\- "Beale? what's this odor?"- asked Nell when she entered in ops.

\- "Nell! I'm sooo glad you're here! have you seen Callen?"

\- "Not today. And you're not answering my question"

\- "It was him"

\- "What?"

\- "The stink! when I arrived this morning Callen was here dressed and smelling like a beggar. He had the murder weapon, he messed up with my files, he gave some orders even for you and he said... well things that he would never say."

\- "You're scaring me, you just said murder weapon?"

\- "I was scared! I thought someone had violated our security system and was here stealing information!"

\- "Let me see..." - Nell started typing on the computer- "OMG, Eric! it's that true? is Julio Molina dead?"

\- "Yes, he seems to be. I'm tracking the car that drove him to the restaurant and I'm still trying to verify the information, but if this guy..."- he signaled the screen where he was treating the video in order to enhance the image- "is Julio Molina, he looks pretty dead to me."

\- "Where is Callen?"

\- "I don't know I thought he was downstairs"

\- "You said he was dressed like a beggar?"

\- "And smelling like one!"

\- "Like this beggar?"- Nell signaled the screen with the image of Sargent Ben leaning over the dealer.

\- "Yes, but no, it's impossible Nell, he was here with me when Deeks..."

\- "And he appeared some time later at the hospital all wet, looking pale like a ghost just to disappear again."

\- "I can't believe it, I don't think he is capable of that."

\- "I don't want to believe neither, but if not Callen who is the killer?" - Nell pressed the intercom button. Callen wasn't answering. She went downstairs. Callen's usually neat desk was a mess of papers, a mug of untouched tea, a half-eaten old cookie, some scattered pills; the stink floated still in the air.

\- "Hey Murphy, have you seen Callen?"

\- "Nope but if you do, tell him to shower at home!"

Nell went to the locker room just to find the stinky jacket and Callen's clothes on the floor and the door of the first aid kit open. She put everything in a plastic bag and did the only reasonable thing to do. To call Hetty.

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When Kensi went out of Deeks' room Sam and Hetty were at the cafeteria, but Nate was waiting for her. She was moved and still shocked for seeing her boy like that. Like in a slow motion film she took off the green paper robe and sat on the chair to remove the protection of her boots.

\- "How are you feeling, Kensi?"- Nate asked sitting at her side. He knew that Kensi usually didn't want to talk about her feelings, she had an inner way of processing everything.

\- "You tell me how I should feel, because I'm feeling all that and even more!"

\- "I know, situations like this one can be overwhelming"

\- "Like this one? Excuse me?! For me it's quite exceptional that your best friend nearly kills your fiancée!"

\- "Wow. I didn't know you and Deeks…"

\- "Don't tell anyone! It's supposed to be a secret; we didn't want Sam to know it yet."

\- "What did you mean about Callen nearly killing Deeks?"

\- "This stupid operation, it was Callen who planned everything. The only thing I know is that I was about to shot my target when he call me to guide Deeks out of the trap he sent him. I trusted him, he told me that he was controlling everything I give every message to Deeks and now I don't know if…" – she bit her lip to avoid crying.

\- "I'm sure there's an explanation, Kensi…"

\- "I give a damn about an explanation! I just want Deeks with me and ok! Callen lost his mind and we all are paying the consequences. First he didn't answer any call, he arrived late to Michelle's funeral just to disappear seconds later, then he fight with Deeks each time he crossed his way, he didn't come to Hawaii and he came back from Washington with a stupid and impossible mission. He sent me to work with the D.E.A. without my partner, and even if I helped him to get again his status of active agent, he put Deeks' life in danger."

\- "I'm lost. You said Callen and Deeks argued and you went to Hawaii?"

\- "Deeks and Callen, Sam and Callen, Nell and Callen, Hetty and Callen… everybody is arguing with Callen because he's acting like an asshole. I tried to support him because he used to be there for me even when I didn't want to see anyone at the hospital after Syria. Sometimes I was so angry that I kicked everyone out, but Callen sneaked at night and just sat there on the floor without saying anything. It was kind of comforting.

Nate smiled. He could picture perfectly Callen sneaking his way into Kensi's room.

\- "And Hawaii? - he asked.

\- "Hawaii was a mission, we went there to keep Nell out of the Washington's radar but it was more like a holiday with Sam and the kids. Callen should have been there."

\- "Why do you think Callen sent you to work with the D.E.A.?"

\- "Just to split me from Deeks the moment we needed each other the most. It was…"- she stopped, thinking that she didn't want to recognize her feelings.

\- "How, Kensi, how was it?"- insisted Nate.

\- "Scaring"- she sighed confessing.

\- "To work with others?"

\- "Not being near Deeks, watching his back and letting him having mine."

\- "But you managed to do it to the point of being the one responsible for finishing the operation."

Kensi looked at the floor, she had never seen the situation that way. Nate changed the subject not wanting to put more pressure.

\- "You said you helped Callen to recover his status, I didn't know he lost it."

\- "He got shot when we were trying to recover Michelle's body. A broken rib. But then…"

At this moment Sam and Hetty entered in the waiting room.

\- "We just saw Deeks' doctor. He's keeping him under until tomorrow to give time to his body to recover."- Said Hetty- "I understand that you want to be here, but this night everybody is going home, understood?"

\- "Hetty…"- protested Kensi.

\- "No, my dear, you're going home to have a good diner and a restful sleep before coming here ready to deal with your partner verbosity. That goes also for both of you gentlemen."

At that moment Hetty's phone vibrated. While she was listening to the message she paled.

\- "I see. Thank you Nell, I'm on my way." –she closed her eyes for a moment-"Oh bugger!"


	68. Chapter 68

A.N.: I'm back :) I hope you had a very happy Thanksgiving for all of you who celebrated. Thanks for your comments as always.

Chapter 68

Chapter 68

\- "What is happening, Hetty?"- asked Nate.

\- "Mr. Callen happens."- she sighed. –"Kensi, dear, you stay here and please inform us if there's any change in Marty's condition. I really can use your help, gentlemen."

When they arrived to ops Eric and Nell were all activity.

\- "Nate!"- Exclaimed Eric.

\- "Nice to see you Beale."

They clumsily had five as Sam looked attentively to the screen with the images of Julio Molina's death and Hetty interrogated Nell.

\- "Miss Jones, an update, please."

\- "Well, yesterday as we…"

\- "Wait a second"- interrupted Sam-"Where is G?"

\- "We don't know. I tried to contact him but…"

\- "I saw him this morning"- said Eric-"he gave me this to analyze and I sent it to the lab"- he showed the image of the murder weapon on the screen.

\- "Is this…?"- started to ask Hetty.

\- "The weapon that killed Julio Molina. Yes."

\- "You saw Callen, was he ok, Mr. Beale?" – she asked.

The engineer didn't know where to hide and he looked at Nell for help.

\- "Eric?"

\- "Ok, he was acting weird."

\- "Weird how? Eric!"- Hetty was more than worried.

\- "He stank. He made a mess with the video files until he found this one."- he said signaling the screen- "He wanted me to confirm the identity of the man killed, to find the car and to investigate with Nell what happened with Deeks' operation."

\- "I found downstairs what he was wearing"- added Nell showing them the bag with Callen's clothes. - "And his car was at the boatshed, with a broken window, bridged and stinking even worse than the clothes."

Hetty opened the bag and the disgusting smell invaded again ops.

\- "Sargent Ben!"- exclaimed Sam. – "Eric, play that video, please."

They held their breaths as they saw the homeless man to stab the dealer that Kensi was supposed to shoot.

\- "For a moment I thought it was Callen"- said Nell -"but it wasn't possible because he was here with Eric, we checked the time."

All of a sudden an e-mail alert biped on Eric and Nell's computer at the same time that Sam's phone vibrated.

Eric opened it on the big screen: it was an already filled form to make Sargent Ben enter the witness protection program, the signature was empty. Sam showed them his phone and read Callen's text:

\- "Take care of him, please."

\- "Lady, gentlemen, it seems to me that we have work to do. Miss Jones: go to the L.A.P.D. central station and kick some asses until you get answers about Mr. Deeks' operation. Mr. Beale, find that car and keep me on the loop with the lab. Mr. Hanna, find that man and proceed with the request as soon as possible. And you Mr. Getz find out why Mr. Callen was wearing like this this morning."- Hetty said giving the bag to Nate.

Hetty, Nell and Sam went out of ops focused on their tasks, but Nate had still some questions:

\- "Eric, can I have a word, please?"

\- "Yes, sure. What do you want, Nate?"

\- "Just to know what is happening."

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "Well, I arrive here and there's a joint operation ordered directly by the Secretary of Defense, each member of the team has a mission and everybody seemed to disagree with Callen. I need to know what's going on."

\- "Not here."- said Eric.

They walked out of ops to the gallery until Eric chose a spot near the window from where he can see the movement downstairs without being seen. Nate smiled and sat on the sill next to him. It was raining outside and the noise of the little drops against the panes filled the silence as Eric cleared his ideas.

\- "It's bad."

\- "What is bad?"- Nate tried to hide the anxiety he was feeling.

\- "Everything since the beginning. What happened to Michelle was wrong but we stuck together. When Sam went rogue it was Callen who made him to come back, he lead us to Khaled and saved Sam on that bus. But then he disappeared."

\- "He was at the funeral."

\- "Yes, but Hetty wasn't feeling ok and he went with her without telling us. Sam was worried and Deeks was mad, and Nell so sad… and everybody blamed me because I couldn't find him. Nobody can if he doesn't want to!"- Eric took his glasses off and played with one of the arms.

\- "And then Hawaii."- pushed Nate nonchalantly.

\- "Callen told me it was a secret mission to protect Nell. She supported Hetty and Callen when they let Khaled go. It was great, but sad, you know what I mean? But when we came back Callen started to give orders and sent Nell to work with the agencies."

\- "And that made you…"

\- "Angry! Nell went to my house crying, she was having nightmares, and she wanted to be in ops. I couldn't convince G and… he even made me shut up!"

\- "But you worked with Callen. How was it?"

\- "Exhausting! I guess you shrinks, no pun intended, have a name for that."

\- "For what exactly?"

\- "For someone who is angry, jumpy, wants to control every detail to the point of reprograming a satellite and had tics."

\- "Tics? Did Callen have tics?"- Nate was surprised now.

\- "Yeah, he touched his ear all the time."

\- "And even with all this problems you got the job done Eric."

\- "At first I was afraid of being alone in ops again, but now it feels like normal. Nevertheless Nell and I are a super team! I would like her back"- Eric's eyes filled with tears.

\- "C'mon, Beale, you did great! Even alone you managed to centralize the work of the most important agencies of the country and you did amazing. You must be proud of yourself"

Eric smiled.

\- "That was exactly what Callen told me this morning. I told you, he is acting weird."

Nate descended the stairs slowly, taking the time of contemplating the magnificent building and the people who worked there. Even ruling in code 5 the space was busy. Everything open, everything in plain sight and nevertheless one couldn't tell what the other was doing. The bullpen was empty, the shared desks the way their users let them. Deeks and Sam's spotless and organized, Kensi's as chaotic as ever and Callen's for the first time, a mess. Was this a metaphor of their lives? Hetty was sat at her desk looking also at the empty space, she seemed smaller and older, her fences down, no traces of the strong woman she was. Nate had one hundred questions for her, but not now. Not before knowing what happened to Callen. He dialed Kensi's number and filled her in. Probably the pajama shirt had a silly explanation.

Half an hour later Kensi phoned back.

\- "Nate, you were right, Callen was in E.R. yesterday."

\- "It was raining, probably he stole the shirt."

\- "No, you don't understand, he was here as a patient. They won't tell me about his condition because of the confidentiality. Oh gosh, Nate, I have the keys of his car and the wallet of his alias."

\- "Kensi, listen to me. He's fine. This morning was in the office and talked to Eric. He gave instructions to continue the operation and an hour ago he sent an e-mail and even texted Sam."

\- "He is hurt Nate!"

\- "Nothing serious, believe me. The nurse's shift is about to change, why you don't try to see Deeks again? I'll go to pick you up later and we can have diner together."

\- "Ok, see you later."


	69. Chapter 69

A.N.: Life just happens and I couldn't update yesterday. Sorry! I don't want to keep you waiting! Thank you for reading :)

Chapter 69

Callen was aware that his clock was ticking, it was a matter of hours that his carte blanche was revoked and he was willing to making use of his privilege before it was too late. He adjusted the blue tie and entered confident into the office of the arrogant C.I.A. agent Warren Chandler.

\- "Callen, what are you doing here?"

\- "I can ask you exactly the same, Warren."

\- "Now that everything is over I thought I could go back to the real world and doing my job"

\- "I see your sources of information are even worse than your interrogators"

The stare of the C.I.A. agent could kill, but Callen ice blue gaze told the man that it wasn't the moment for joking.

\- "What do you want Callen?"

\- "I want your units on the streets. Now. Same position. And I want immediate access to the detainees."

\- "I thought that we have the control over them."

\- "Not anymore. Here, a signed order for their transfer to the federal prison in Washington. You have the custody and the responsibility until the Secretary of Defense exonerated you. And now I need to talk to them."

\- "It sounds like you're threatening me."

\- "It sounds like I'm not repeating that I want to talk to the prisoners right away."

Again the duel of gazes was won by Callen.

\- "Follow me."

After an eternal succession of corridors, elevators, security grills, cameras and codes G went into the driver's cell. He took a device from his pocket and put it on the fake mirror where he knew the sound receptor would be. The voice distorter prevented the C.I.A. agent from understanding the conversation.

\- "¿Trick or treat?"- asked Callen to the startled man.

\- "¿Qué?"("what?")-the man didn't speak English.

\- "Truco o trato. Halloween. El día de los muertos. Lo siento, es una costumbre anglosajona, los niños piden caramelos y si no se los dan hacen alguna travesura. En este caso se traduce por o me das lo que quiero o te arruino la vida." ("I'm sorry, is an Anglo-Saxon tradition, the kids ask for candies and if they don't get them they do some mischief. In this case the translation is or you give what I want or I ruin your life.")

\- "¡Ya he dicho todo lo que sé, lo prometo, pero ese gringo no entendía nada!" (I already said all I know, I promise, but that gringo didn't understand a thing!")

\- "Yo sí te entiendo" ("I do understand you")- G leaned over the table invading the prisoner's personal space. The guy was more than frightened.- "Dame una dirección y no te va a pasar nada." ("Give me an address and nothing will happen to you")

\- "¿Una dirección?" ("an address?")

\- "La dirección de la casa en Mar Vista donde se va a reunir Julio con su hermano." ("The address of the house in Mar Vista where Julio is going to meet his brother.")

\- "¿Cómo lo sabes?"("How do you know it?")

\- "Sé muchas cosas, Pedro, sé por ejemplo la dirección de tu madre en Sinaloa" ("I know a lot of things, Pedro, I know for instance your mother's address in Sinaloa)"- said Callen with a coldness that froze even the C.I.A. agent at the other side of the mirror. The driver started to cry.

\- "Por favor… me van a matar…" ("Please… they are going to kill me…")

\- "Entonces eres hombre muerto" ("Then you're a death man")- affirmed Callen knocking the door in order to go out.

\- "¡Espera! No sé la dirección, es una casa como amarilla con un garaje grande de puertas blancas – ("Wait! I don't know the address, is a house kind of yellow with a big garage of white doors")- Callen stepped out- ¡Por favor, está en Stanwood Drive!" (Please, it is in Stanwood Drive!)

\- "Gracias Pedro."- G closed the door.

The agent was in the corridor.

\- "Very clever Callen."

\- "The other prisoner, now, and don't worry in less than ten minutes I'll leave you alone."

They walked to another cell and Callen walked into directly to the table in the middle. The detainee was sat on a chair his hands and feet cuffed and his eyes closed.

\- "Mario Alberto Suárez"- said G with Russian accent this time – "I have two sentences here for you"- he said taking out of his pocket two papers.- "Death penalty or life sentence."

The man opened the eyes.

\- "What do you want?"- he asked.

\- "His name"- said Callen putting in front of him the picture with Mario and the mysterious man in the car that Anna took nearly two months ago in Little Ethiopia.

The laughs resounded in the cell.

\- "That naïve idiot? I don't give a damn about him! He is probably death in that shit of country he wants to liberate. Ha, ha, ha!"

\- "His name!"

\- "Mohamed Shana."

Callen destroyed the death penalty sentence in little pieces and knocked at the door.

\- "Who are you?"

\- "The Russian guy who started this and now is going to finish it."

With the information he needed G went out the building from the front door leaving the car in the parking. He knew that Hetty knew, but he didn't care anymore.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nate sat down in the sofa in front of Hetty's desk. With her he always felt like a child before the headmaster of the school. Innocent or not you always felt scared. He decided an indirect approach:

\- "Where is Sam?"

\- "I sent him with his unit. That man needs protection and Sam is the one who can find him and process the documents as soon as possible. But you don't want to talk about Sam."

Nate turned in his seat.

\- "He was there last night, wasn't he? at the hospital. Hurt. Feeling guilty. We were there together for Deeks and for Kensi and he was alone."

\- "Hetty I don't think he's…"

\- "Oh, but he is Mr. Getz. He is hurt and not only physically, believe me. This time I don't know if we will be able to bring him back, he is lost. I know him too damn well."

Hetty tone was sad, resigned.

\- "From what I know I don't believe Callen is the way you describe. He worked with the team to take Deeks off that building, sacrificing the whole mission, using Kensi to get to him. He went to the hospital to check on his people, this morning he was focused on the operation despite everything. His instructions were concrete, pertinent, to the right receptor. To me he is just doing his job and being a team leader. We need just to talk to him. Maybe Eric can track his phone and…"

\- "You don't understand, Nate. He's at the C.I.A. headquarters."

\- "How do you know?"

\- "The grey suit. He changed the beggar clothes for a grey suit and went there to look for some answers."

\- "Ok, that's a good sign, someone who lost his mind is not able to do that; he is adapting to the environment, as he always does. We can meet him there."

\- "The grey suit and the Aston Martin. He loves the Rapide, but after the nine hundred dollars ticket some years ago I got him stuck with the Mercedes. He knows that I'd know, but he doesn't care. Not anymore."

A little light on Callen's desk caught Hetty's attention. His computer was on. Followed by Nate she opened the laptop and unlocked the last file G had worked on. It was the interactive map of the city with the 8x8 grid. Sixty four squares. Pressing the "Enter" key the squares began to fill with a series of letters and numbers: 1.P4R, 3, 4, DxT …

\- "Oh my goodness!"- Hetty, suddenly pale, sat heavily on Callen's chair.

\- "What's that Hetty?"

\- "This is the proof that Mr. Callen is either completely crazy or a bloody genius!"

Nate was more than surprised at Hetty's choice of words.

\- "It was right under our noses all the time and we couldn't see it!"

Seeing Nate was still lost she signaled the grid and explained:

\- "He is playing chess, Mr. Getz, the city is the board and he had been using the units as pieces. That's why he blocked the units in the same zone for days or made them move ignoring all the military tactics."

\- "That's a long shot Hetty, the grid is just a practical way to situate the units and the codes it could mean anything, a way of describing what's there or whatever. I play a little chess myself and the movements aren't described like that."

\- "Not anymore, that's right. He is using the descriptive notation, the one prevailing before 1737."- she put a hand over her mouth, her mind racing.

Nate signaled the letters and the numbers:

\- "Even if the notation is ancient, the name of the pieces doesn't match."

\- "Don't you get it, do you? He is playing in Spanish!"

Hetty stood up and phoned to the airport. She booked the private jet to go to Washington as soon as possible. She was determined to do what she should have done long ago: to stop this nonsense.

Nate was taken aback, he didn't know who was crazier if Callen or Hetty, but if this was a chess play, who was winning it?


	70. Chapter 70

A.N.: I'm glad you liked G's plan. I really appreciate your comments and I'll try to answer all of them if you're logged. Thank you very much for your support!

Chapter 70

Sam used all his influences to accelerate the process to get Sargent Ben into the witness protection program. As a former military and with the Molina cartel implied it was relatively easy to have the papers ready in no time.

Once more Sam went to the streets. The sky was grey not even a glimmer of sun between the clouds and it was cold. It seemed that the weather was matching his mood. It took him hours to find Gene who was protecting himself from the wind in a big tube on a desert construction site. Together they managed to find and talk to five of the guys of the secret army. Sam gave some money for food and paid a pension for them, at least they would sleep warm for some days until that damn cold front passed. The next step was to find out where the Sargent was hiding, but even without talking to the agent in charge at the boatshed that morning he had a pretty good idea.

The moment Sam arrived to G's house he noticed that something was off even if he couldn't figure out exactly what. He knocked at the door, took the key from under the pot and with his weapon ready he entered. The house was quiet, as empty as always and apparently unoccupied. He called Sargent Ben in a reassuring tone, he told him about the program and the fact that he will have a house and access to medical treatment; he told him that finally he will be able sleep at night because every night will be safe. He assured him he did good, and he explain why he had to go the day before. Some minutes later he heard some sobs coming from G's bedroom. Curled in the cupboard he found Sargent Ben. He gave him his hand to help him to stand and hugged him. That hug made him understand what G wanted to tell him: no matter how bad you are there's always someone worse than you. First thing in the morning he'll look for his friend to let him know that Sargent Ben would be safe forever.

That night Sam was so exhausted that the long bath he wanted to take was relegated to a short hot shower and for the first time since Michelle's death he slept like a baby in its own bed.

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Avoiding street cameras G went into a busy diner where even before ordering a waitress served him a mug of hot coffee that he grabbed with both hands gratefully. He was cold and it wasn't helping with the stiffness of his muscles. The interview with the prisoners had let him a bittersweet taste. He had the information he needed, but that same information some time before could have saved Deeks.

Next day he'll try to finish what he had started no matter what. He'll have the rest of his life to pay for the consequences of his acts. He took the burner phone out of his pocket and when he was about to dial he saw an unread text that got him a lump in his throat:

\- "U.C. what will happen to me if my dad died?"

He wrote to Kam quickly:

\- "U still got family and people who love u. I'm not gonna let ur daddy die."

And waited crossing his fingers hoping she could read his message. The answer arrived seconds later.

\- "U can't guarantee that."

\- "I swear u that I'll protect him with my life."

\- "U take care of him, please!"

\- "Always."

Outside it was pouring down and the drops were racing each other on the window. G looked at them for a while, his problems were nothing compared to Kamran's anguish; he knew first-hand how hard can be to survive at twelve years old in a new environment without parents, but he couldn't imagine to bear the anguish of knowing that your father could also die when you had just lost your mum. Sam was right this girl had stolen his heart.

Anna… after Joelle he really thought that he could never love someone, but with her everything was easy. Little by little nearly without realizing it she had conquered him in a way nobody did before. It was new and it was scary. G took the paper napkin and wrote a list with the things he loved about her. So silly… he was about to crumple the paper when the waitress that was waiting with his order intervened:

\- "Honey, if someone write me half of the things you just did I'd marry him right away. Believe me! I'll be back with your cake."

\- "I didn't order a cake!"

\- "It's on the house."- she said winking at him.

Callen smiled. In fact the nosy waitress gave him an idea and when she came back with the cake and a coffee refill he asked her for paper. He was rewarded with pink cards and envelopes. Better than nothing. It was getting late and he still needed to know about Deeks. He phoned Eric.

\- "Beale it's me. Don't bother to locate the call."

\- "Callen! Where're you? Hetty was very pissed off she's stuck at the airport trying to go to Washington! Sam was looking for you and Nate asked me to track your phone."

\- "Any news on Deeks?"

\- "No changes. Tomorrow they are going to wake him up and we'll see. Callen do you think he's gonna be ok?"

\- "I hope so, Eric, I hope so. Listen I'm going to need your help early tomorrow. It's just an address and another kaleidoscope run to locate that car."

\- "Wait, is still the mission going on? Hetty…"

\- "Did you receive my dismissal?"

\- "No, but…"

\- "Until then nothing changes."

\- "Callen, please phone the guys!"

\- "I don't want to bother at this time in the hospital…"

\- "Hetty sent everyone home."

\- "What? Is Kensi ok?"

\- "Tired, I guess. Nate insisted that she needed to rest. He went to have dinner with her and Nell."

\- "And Sam?"

\- "He passed all day with the witness protection program, he told me that he would be tomorrow in the office."

\- "I'll see everyone tomorrow, then. Thank you Eric. Have some rest."

When G hung up the phone a wave of anger invaded his chest. What the hell was happening? Everybody got crazy suddenly? He let a generous tip to the waitress and went outside under the rain to the store he saw at the other side of the window where he let an envelope and precise instructions. For the first time in centuries the lucky was on his side and an Uber was near his position. During the ride the anger mitigated somehow but then anguish made his apparition. For a moment it was even hard to breathe and not only because of his rib. He needed to focus so he managed to control his emotions before arriving to his destination. It was time to put an end to all this. One last call to Alex Hemsley the ex from the Global Criminals Tribunal, reassured Callen. The machine was working.

Now that G knew where to find everything he managed to tidy himself, to change his clothes for a blue pajama, to steal an I.D. card and to sneak into Deeks' hospital room. Once there he checked that he was alright and sat on a corner on the floor. No way he let him alone.


	71. Chapter 71

A.N.: Warning cliffhanger ahead, sorry! Thanks for being there, as always :)

Chapter 71

When Eric arrived to the mission early in the morning he found this time a freshly showered Callen hanging a wet wrinkled gray suit in Hetty's clothes rack. Oh, oh he's playing with fire, he thought.

\- "Morning Eric."

\- "Good morning, well with this rain and Deeks in the hospital it's just a saying."

\- "You're right, but he'll be ok, I'm sure or it."

\- "Hello guys!"- said Nell- "Callen, Hetty is finally on her way to Washington. She took off three hours ago."

\- "So it means that I only have one more hour. I really can use your help in this one, I just need to find and check an address in Mar Vista, then all be over, promised."

\- "Just an address?"- asked Nell suspicious.

\- "And a car near that address."

\- "Let's do it"- said Eric heading upstairs.

Nell noticed that Callen was slightly limping his way up and that his favorite plaid blue shirt seemed two sizes bigger. She really needed to help Hetty to stop this nonsense.

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Sam was driving to the office when he received Nell's call. G was at the mission with another operation in mind. He gave instructions to not let him go out and accelerated a bit more. He needed to talk to his partner, to clarify everything, to know his reasons, to ask him patience with Kensi, because he knows her words had hurt him. He parked at the front door and in two strides he was in ops.

\- "Hi guys, where is G?"

\- "He just went out here, we have the address and the car he was looking for and he is going to check it."

\- "Send me that address, please Eric!"

With the same speed he went up he went down. G wasn't at his desk or in the open space, running he entered in the armory where he nearly bumped into Callen who was finishing of securing the holster and the bullet proof vest.

\- "Wow, where is the fire?"- he asked startled.

\- "G! finally! We need to talk!"

\- "Certainly not now."- he answered checking again his weapon and picked several chargers from a box.

\- "Eric told me about an address in Mar Vista."

\- "Sam, listen, nothing you can say or do are preventing me from going there now. This is important and I don't have time to explain it. Hetty is on her way to Washington to throw her career and this unit away and maybe I can put a stop to everything."

\- "Then I'm going with you."

\- "Sam…"

\- "I'm your partner you like it or not."

G sighed. This was about protecting Sam, not about to get him killed, but he knew him too damn well and one thing was for sure: his partner was capable of giving him a concussion before letting him going solo.

\- "Ok, but hurry up. I updated you in the car."

\- "This address is just two miles away. Something I need to know?

\- "The house is near Santa Monica airport, very convenient. Probably two members of the cartel are already there waiting for the rest to arrive my guess is that Alberto Molina is one of them. They will be armed and ready to fight and fly out of the country. Hetty will need them alive."

\- "Two men, international terrorists and you wanted to go there on your own? Really G, I don't understand what you pretend. This damn mission is doing a number on you! When was the last time you look yourself in a mirror?"

\- "Sam, please, it's not the moment."

\- "The only reason I went to the office this morning instead of being in the hospital with Kensi is to talk to you. In case you don't know it, today the doctors are waking Deeks up, but you seemed to care more about a mission that about your friends."

Sam comment was like a knife in G's heart. What was happening? they let the man alone all night and now it was his fault? He turned the hurt into rage; not now, he needed to focus. G breathed as deep as his rib would allow and closed his eyes. When he opened them again they were steel blue.

\- "Let's get this done first. But Sam, if you're coming I need you focused and ready"

Sam knew well that stare and it was dangerous.

\- "I'm ready."

12118 Stanwood Drive. Sam parked the Challenger one block away from the objective. It was a residential neighborhood with trees on the sidewalk and a slope that provided the perfect cover: he and Callen could see the house where the dealer was hiding, without being repaired. According to Eric the car that took Julio Molina to the restaurant was there and probably drove by another important member of the cartel.

The agents checked again their vest and took their weapons out. Sam got out the vehicle and looked at the house with the binoculars. It had started to rain again some minutes ago, first some scattered drops that quick became a shower. Thick grey clouds were darkening the morning, prelude of another storm. Taking advantage of being alone G took the phones off his pocket and sent a quick text with the burner one:

\- "Hey Banana! I love u."

Sam leaned to check on G and he saw him closing the glove compartment.

\- "Everything is calm. What? You don't want to get wet?"- he teased.

Callen went out of the car and wished to have the N.C.I.S.'s unit as backup on this one, but the opportunity of finishing the cartel off was too good to wait for them. It was now or never, however he had a bad feeling. He wiped out the rain of his face and looked at his partner who was already all business.

\- "Hey guys!"-Eric's voice on the intercom startled Callen whose sensitivity to the noises was still exacerbated. –"Confirmed; the car is in the garage, it was just the driver in there when it arrived. Hetty's flight is about to land. You better hurry."

\- "Thank you Eric. Send us back up as soon as possible."- asked G.

\- "Reinforcements are on their way, they'll arrive in fifteen minutes."

\- "We don't have fifteen minutes" – murmured Callen. Slyly he took his earpiece off and threw it away. His ear was buzzing, he didn't need balance problems right now. -"Ready?"- he asked to his partner.

\- "Let's do it" – answered Sam.

Both partners ran heads down and entered the garden crouching behind a metallic fence. The heavy rain gave them the advantage of not being heard from the interior, but being soaking wet wasn't the best of the conditions to break into the house. Out of the corner of his eye Callen saw three men at the other side of the window near the front door. He was expecting two. He didn't like it. They were loading their weapons and getting ready to leave. Only a sudden attack could work and he wasn't going to allow Sam to take any risk.

\- "You cover the back I take the front door. Twenty seconds. Go."

Trying not to slip on the wet floor Sam went around the garden, disappearing from G's sight. It was a big house and G knew that twenty seconds were probably a bit short for surrounding the garden and reaching the back door. Better like that.


	72. Chapter 72

A.N.: I know, sorry. Ready for some action? thank you as always!

Chapter 72

A bark, two. Damnit. A dog in the back yard was now barking loud probably at Sam and it wouldn't stop. Callen saw movement at the interior of the house and guessing that the men were going to check on the dog at Sam's side, without double thinking, he threw himself through the window shooting at the same time to one of the dealers in the head that went down dead instantaneously.

The members of the cartel recovered in seconds from the surprise and two of them started to fire Callen, who had landed between the window and the sofa of the big living room. The other two took just seconds to get their weapons ready. G had miscalculated the number of persons present on the house from the beginning, there were four without counting the dead one, all pissed off and armed. Soon the couch stopped providing much protection and the bullets were dangerously approaching its target.

G knew a thing for certain, he had no intention of dying hiding behind a piece of furniture, if his day had arrived he will go buying some time for Sam, so he counted the bullets and waited until the man near to him needed to reload, then taking a deep breath, he went out his hideout and shot him dead. Quickly he threw himself on the floor to avoid the shots from the other two and he managed to hurt one of them in the leg, but not before a bullet graze his right arm making him to lose his weapon. At this moment he realized he was going to die.

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Sam was about to enter the house from the back door when he heard the unmistakable noise of a body hitting the glass and shattering it to pieces. "What the hell G!" without wasting time he broke into the house for the back door and flew from a room to another one desperate to get to Callen. Weapon in hand he arrived just in time to kill the man who was about to shot G. From the floor Callen managed to pick up his gun and shot on the shoulder the last shooter who felt down unconscious. The house was suddenly silent. For a second Sam was shocked at the sight of the five bodies on the floor and the heavy damage inflicted to the furniture and the room walls, then he ran from man to man securing the weapons and confirming that only one of the cartel members was alive. The silence was broken by G's quick breathing and the noise of the glasses when he tried to get up.

\- "G! don't move!"- ordered Sam kneeling at his side.- "Let me see."

\- "It's nothing, Sam, really…"-said G a little bit shaky. Sat on the floor with the back against the rest of the destroyed couch he allowed Sam to examine his arm.

\- "Eric, Nell, I need the paramedics in here, G had been shot and we have one of the bad guys wounded."

\- "OMG Sam!- shouted Nell- how bad?

\- "Flesh wound in the arm, he'll be fine, but it's a deep cut and he's bleeding. There were five men, Nell, it was a death trap."

Sam cut G's sleeve and tied it above the wound while Callen gritted the teeth in an attempt to suppress a moan. I hurt, but he knew it was a small price to pay, all things consider.

\- "Callen, Callen do you hear me?"- asked Eric worried.

Sam looked at his partner completely unaware of Eric's calls.

\- "He doesn't Eric, but don't worry he's gonna be fine"- he answered for him.

\- "The ambulance will be there in five, Sam."

\- "Thank you, Eric"- touching his ear Sam disconnected the communication with ops, then he looked at his partner into the eyes. He was pretty serious.

\- "Now you and I are going to talk. Where is your earpiece?"

\- "Don't know Sam, maybe it fell."

\- "In that case you'd be looking for it just to avoid Hetty's scolding."

\- "Sam, I've been shot!"

\- "Oh yeah? And why have you been shot? Maybe, and just maybe, because your broke all the protocols and security rules, just maybe because you break into a house with five armed and dangerous men throwing yourself through a window, just maybe, and I mean, maybe, because you choose to disconnect the communication with your team…"

Raising his voice with each affirmation Sam was angrier each second with G. He leaned over his partner completely invading his personal space and nearly pushing him he asked:

\- "Why G? why are you doing this to me?"

\- "Have you finished? Because if you have, maybe, and I mean, maybe, you can tell Nell to identify the bodies and to call to Washington asap, and then maybe, you can check on the suspect, just, you know, to avoid Hetty's scolding if he dies." – replied Callen with irony as he got up and walked free of Sam's reach. He couldn't stand to be in the house anymore so he went outside in spite of the heavy rain. Sirens were sounding in the distance, but G didn't hear them. The flight of the bullets from the previous shooting out had intensified the buzzing in his ear and he couldn't hear a thing by the left side.

Sam was very pissed off, sometimes his partner was just impossible, but this time he has gone too far. Reluctantly he went to check on the wounded man.

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Hetty was tired. She had passed the night waiting for the storm to pass and thinking about strategies, negotiations and then her possibilities of making a deal again.

\- "Henrietta good morning, I see you and your arrogance don't lose time to rub me your victory in the face."- saluted the Secretary of Defense.

\- "Don't be stupid, Edmond!"

\- "As I told your agent last time he was here you're not getting any privileges for this operation. Finishing the Molina cartel was just the deal."

Hetty had no clue of what the man was talking about, but she was ready to go along with the game.

\- "If the victory is so big that you're getting reelected because of my unit I think that some reconnaissance would be in order, and I'm here just to remind you that this time it's my team who gave you the trump card."

\- "I've already paid the price, Henrietta."

\- "Oh no Edmond, you've paid the first installment."- smiled Hetty still playing by ear.

\- "Will see, will see, and now if you excuse me, I've an announcement to do."

They shook hands and the moment he walked down the corridor Hetty phoned to ops.

\- "Miss Jones, what the hell is happening?!"

\- "OMG Hetty! I'll tried to phone you. The cartel is down!"

\- "I realized that. But how?"

\- "I don't know how but Callen had the address of where the cartel leaders were hiding. He went there with Sam and ... well there is a survivor and we confirmed the identity of the other four. Sam told us to pass the information to Washington as soon as possible."

\- "Are you telling me that they were alone to the lion's den?

\- "Yes, Callen was injured, but don't worry, Sam said it is a flesh wound." – she added quickly.- "The operation is over Hetty."

\- "I see, thank you Nell. Please communicate me with Mr. Callen."

\- "His earpiece is disconnected Hetty and he's not responding his phone, but you can speak to Sam."

Getting out to the Capitol as fast as she could Hetty dialed again and asked:

\- "Mr. Hanna. What the hell happened?"

\- "Hetty."


	73. Chapter 73

A.N.: It took a while, but the operation is over. Thank you for your patience and support! This chapter is a short one, but another is coming ;)

Chapter 73

\- "Are you ok Callen? Paramedics! Over here!"- asked the newly arrived agent concerned to find the team leader alone under the rain supporting his bleeding arm.

\- "I'm ok Thomson; go inside, please, agent Hanna may need your help. We need to identify the men down asap."-

\- "Got it."- he answered but he didn't move until the paramedic arrived next to Callen.

\- "Sir, this way please, we need to take a look to your arm."

Reluctantly Callen followed the paramedic to the ambulance's back door where he sat on the step. The doctor cut the sleeve that Sam had tied and started to disinfect the cut. Now that the operation was over G started to feel the crash of his adrenaline level and an unexpected anxiety for what could have happen to Sam if he would have gone through the front door. He knew that his partner was mad at him, he needed to tell Sam, to make him understand why he did what he did. His breathing and heart beat accelerated and he fidgeted only to be stopped by the paramedic.

-"Sir you need to calm down, I do really need to clean the wound"- he said pouring some saline on Callen's arm and applying pressure.

It hurt like hell and for a moment Callen felt dizzy. "What is this man doing?"- he thought all his alarms turning on. He didn't want to be there. He just needed Sam. He was about to escape when he saw his partner approaching the ambulance. He looked very pissed off.

\- "The suspect?" – asked Callen not knowing how to start the conversation.

\- "He'll live. Your arm?"

\- "I'll live."- he said moving his arm without thinking and closing his eyes when a wave of pain made him saw stars.

Ignoring Callen's answer Sam addressed to the paramedic who had just finished of putting a very tight big bandage on G's arm and was filling a syringe:

\- "How is he?"

\- "He has a deep cut that affected the muscle. I've just put a pressure bandage to stop the bleeding, but he needs to be stitched up and antibiotics. I'm going to give him a painkiller and we're heading to the California Hospital Medical Center."

Deeks' hospital. At least they could be together. Sam looked at his partner who sat very still with his arm in his lap. He was pale and looked exhausted; he could tell he was in pain. Good. Next time he'll think twice about going rogue.

\- "Ok. Thank you. I'll go ahead the ambulance. See you there G."

But Callen only heard Sam's last sentence and saw his friend running under the rain. Careful not to move his arm too much he got up ready to follow his partner.

\- "Wow, wow. What are you doing, sir? Please lie down I need to give you an injection before going to the hospital.

\- "No way. I'm good."

\- "Sir! You cannot walk away, you need medical attention!"

\- "Do you think you can prevent me from going?"- said Callen showing him his gun and in a tone of voice that only could mean trouble.

\- "Of course not! If you don't want to be treated is your problem, but I need you to sign the form renouncing to it."

Once the paperwork was in order, the ambulance leaved and G walked to the block where Sam parked the car what it seemed an eternity ago. The Challenger wasn't there. No way. How could Sam leave me here? – he thought angry. He didn't understand his partner, he reckoned Sam was mad at him, but he never thought that he would be able to leave him. What happened with the famous "no one is left behind"? Double standard for the civil population? He checked his pocket but he didn't found his phone. Great. Not even Uber. The mission was not far away anyway. More than angry and completely soaked he started to walk towards the headquarters.

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\- "Yes Sam? How is Callen?"- answered Eric to the incoming call. - "What? Let me check … the ambulance arrived fifteen minutes ago. Ok, bye."

\- "Any problem Beale?" - asked Nell.

\- "Sam doesn't find Callen. The ambulance arrived, but he hasn't found G on ER."

\- "Don't worry; probably they are patching him up and Sam hadn't seen him yet."

The wonder twins looked on the eyes and thinking alike they said at the same time:

\- "His phone!"

\- "Tracking"- exclaimed Nell.

\- "Loading"- replied Eric, who checked the information and added relieved -"He's in the hospital."

\- "I told you not to worry"- Nell said.

\- "Yeah, you know, is Callen."

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More than tired, the boots full of water that chafed his heels and his arm torturing him with a throbbing pain at each step, the last mile was being hard for Callen. In spite of the quick walking he was cold and the guilt he started to feel once the anger had passed, wasn't helping to make things easier. He knew this entire situation was his fault, he expected too much from Sam knowing that he wasn't ok since Michelle's death. He couldn't allow himself to be so sloppy again. And now his arm. He needed to get to the end of all this for Sam, for the children, for the team, and he couldn't allow anybody to prevent him from doing it. He had to act quick, but not now. He shuddered. Two more blocks. Dammit it hurt.

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Unable to find G Sam went to Deeks' room hoping to find his partner there, but instead of Callen he saw Nate who was waiting for Kensi. The doctors were about to wake Deeks up and only family was allowed inside.

\- "Hey Nate! Have you seen G?"

\- "No, Eric said he was with you."

\- "And he was, but he got hurt and I can't find him in ER"

\- "Oh geez! How bad?"

\- "A bullet's graze in his arm. It's deep, though, and an ambulance brought him here. Nobody saw him and I'm starting to worry."

\- "Do you think he did something stupid?"

\- "Like ditching the doctors? Yes I do. I don't know what the hell is happening in his head right now, but he needs medical attention."

\- "Ok, stay here with Kensi, please, she will need someone if Deeks..."

\- "Don't say it Nate!"

\- "Anyway, I know someone in ER who may help with Callen. Keep me posted, please!"- he said going out the waiting room.

Nate was taken aback for the news. On his way to ER his phone went crazy. What the heck was happening?


	74. Chapter 74

A.N.: it was time to know about Kensi and Deeks ;) Enjoy!

Chapter 74

Kensi was anguished. Even if she knew that it was nonsense to spend the night in the waiting room outside the I.C.U. where Deeks was and that the rest worked wonders to keep her focused, she couldn't help but feeling guilty. The team of doctor and nurses were already in the room.

\- "Do you want us to wait for his brother or can we proceed?- asked the nurse to Kensi.

\- "His brother?"

\- "Yeah, I meet him early this morning, you know, handsome guy, very short hair, blue eyes… I didn't know he worked here in the hospital.

For a second Kensi panicked, but nearly automatically she thought about Callen.

\- "You can proceed, please."

The moment the drug hit his system Deeks opened the eyes, at first groggily and unfocused and then wide open with fear when he noticed the respirator in his throat.

\- "Easy, easy, don't fight it."- the doctor checked his pupils and the position of the respirator.

\- "Deeks honey, it's ok, listen to the doctor!" – tried Kensi, holding his hand, but Deeks was beyond panic, his eyes full of tears, his heart racing.

\- "Can you hear me Mr. Deeks? I know it's difficult, not to fight, but try to relax. I'm going to free you from this now. I need you to cough hard to help the tube out. Ok, on my three...- he said holding the tube – "one, two, tree!"

The tube went out and Deeks coughed, his throat burning. A mask was put in his nose and mouth and the bed was raised to let him in a nearly sitting position.

\- "Deep breaths now, you're doing great"- the doctor said checking again the level of response, the oxygen saturation and the heart rate. He was pleased with the results and reassured Kensi with a confident stare.

Deeks touched the mask and looked at Kensi smiling. The fear of brain damage erased at once just with a goofy smile.

\- "Hey you, welcome back!" – she wiped his tears out in a tender gesture with his hand as he tried to get a regular flow of air in his lungs.

\- "How are you feeling?"

\- "Kens…"- a cough attack prevented him from speaking.

\- "Don't force it, try to breathe normally. I know your throat is sore and feels like burning, it will pass eventually. You can have some ice chips, but don't abuse. If it's too bad I can give you some local painkiller spray. Just push the button and a nurse will come. For now take it easy. I'll give you some minutes, but then you rest, ok?"- said the doctor patting Deeks' good leg and getting out of the room.

Kensi wiped her own tears and touched Deeks' face.

\- "Don't scare me never again like that, do you hear me?"

\- "You… save… me"- the weak and raspy voice was followed by another cough.

\- "I don't want to talk about it, I'm just happy to have you back!"- said Kensi offering some ice in a spoon that Deeks accepted grateful.

\- "But you did. I don't know how you knew, but you lead me out of hell. I love you, baby"- said Deeks stronger this time.

\- "I love you too!"- she kissed him all the way around the mask, making him smile again.

\- "I'm sorry"- apologized Deeks.

\- "Why? You have nothing to be sorry about!"

\- "Yeah… the operation… I couldn't control my men. I tried to stop them, but they wouldn't listen. It was a trap."- he coughed again.

\- "Schhhh, don't worry about that now, the important thing is that you will be ok."

\- "How did you know I was…?"

\- "It was Callen, he told me to contact you and he gave me the instructions, but you didn't… Oh gosh Deeks! I thought you were…"

Deeks held her hand and for a second both of them remained silent.

\- "I panicked."- he said.

\- "Well, me too!"

\- "I panicked and I went to the first window. It was locked."

Kensi remembered G's voice repeating "the second window" over and over again.

\- "When I went to the other one and explosion made me fly and…"

\- "And you are here with me."

\- "Callen… I need to speak with him…"- Deeks' eyes were closing. He was exhausted.

\- "And you'll do it. Both of us, I promised. But now rest, baby, rest."

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Nell went out the incinerator room when she heard a noise at the front door. Turning her head she saw him.

\- "Oh Lord! Callen! What the hell?!"-she exclaimed running towards the door where G was standing. He seemed to come back from a swing in freezing water, wet from head to toe and shivering. The bandage on his arm was loose and blood trickled from the wound, a trail of blood drops marking his path from the exterior.

\- – "Can you walk? You're bleeding! "- she walked him to the couch, made him to sit and put a blanket on his shoulders. With the end she wiped out the water of his face. The fact that Callen allowed her to do so spoke volumes of his state.

Eric who had seen G to arrive on the security camera arrived to the couch in no time.

\- "Callen! I thought you were at the hospital! Your phone…"- he started to say, but seeing G's state he stopped. – "I'm going to call an ambulance."

\- "No hospital"- was the first and only thing that G managed to say.

\- "Geez Callen, let me help you, let's go to the couch"- he passed Callen's good arm around his neck and supported part of his weight.

Nell took advantage of Eric's presence to phone Nate. Without Hetty he'd probably had some clues to deal with Callen.

\- "No, Nate, I don't think is too bad, but he is freezing and he needs stitches."

\- "Then let the N.C.I.S.'s doctor to do it. Someone Callen is familiar with, and stay with him, let him feel that you have his back. Try to reassure him, if you force him to do something he doesn't want to you'll have problems. I'll be there as soon as possible."

\- "Ok, but hurry up, please!"

\- "On my way, ah! Nell! Above all, don't let him go!"

When Nell came back Eric had helped Callen to get rid of the wet shirt and the boots. G seemed to be in another planet, shivering and with a blank stare.

\- "Hey Callen, I'm going to say Leslie to have a look at your arm, maybe she can patch you up in here. Don't worry I'll stay with you, and Eric will put the fold screen here to give you some privacy."- she said making signs to Eric who went to help her.

Callen was thankful that Nell didn't ask questions or gave him a hard time. In addition to being in pain he felt exhausted, cold and weak, but above all angry with himself for overestimate his strength.

Eric came back with a towel and his bag for the gym just to go away to answer a call. Clumsily G managed to dry himself and to change into his grey sweatpants just before Nell arrived with the doctor who seeing his parlor tried to make him lay.

\- "Agent Callen, lay down, please and put you're your feet in the arm of the couch."

\- "I can't… my back…"-G was weaker now that the adrenaline was leaving his body.

\- "You hurt your back? Ok, lay down in your stomach, then, and try to breathe deeply. That's it. Let me have a look."

When the doctor took the blanket out Nell nearly cry at the sight of Callen's injures. The thick scabs, the pink skin where they fell, the blues and the scars and a big dirty bandage on his shoulder. Then she took a pair of scissors and took the bandage of his arm off.

\- "Callen…"- started to say Nell and then stopping not knowing how to continue.

G turned his head to the other side. It was the only way he had of hiding, at this moment he couldn't deal with the compassion of his friends. He didn't need more shit.

\- "Well agent, I guess you know the drill. I'm going numb the wound with lidocaine, it will take the pain away but you'll feel me touching around. Ready?"- the doctor asked.

\- "Yeah"- said Callen feeling everything but ready. At the third pinch G couldn't avoid a moan.

\- "I know it hurts, I'm sorry"- said the doctor injecting again- "you're doing great"- she encouraged.

\- "Callen…"- said Eric stopping abruptly when he saw G's injuries.- "Oh gosh G…"- Nell touched his arm.

\- "What do you want Eric?"- Callen was angry and confused. Why everybody seemed to care now when the operation was over and not before when he needed them? The rage distracted him from the pain of the needle and he held in that feeling even if his body tensed hurting more.

\- "Hetty is coming back. She told me that everything is going to be ok and that you don't have to worry anymore. She wants you to rest."

\- "And that's exactly what he is going to do. If you want to stay here, fine, but he needs to relax."- said the doctor.

Nor the lidocaine nor the good bedside manners of the doctor made things easy for G. He tried not to think on Sam, he rather concentrated on the physical pain, he wasn't able to control the haunted feelings that threaten him day and night.

The doctor secured the wound with a big bandage around the arm, and cleaned G's shoulder and scratches. When she finished, she covered him again with the blanket and let him to finally rest.

\- "I let painkillers here, I'm sure that you could use some. And, please agent, take it very easy for a while."

\- "Thank you."- answered G ignoring the painkillers. Then, exhausted, he drifted along a slumber full of nightmares.


	75. Chapter 75

A.N.: It never ceased to amaze me the level of commitment you have with this story, guys! thanks a lot!

Chapter 75

Nate arrived to the mission two hours later cursing L.A. and its traffic; he didn't know exactly why, because the reason was inexistent, but he had a strange sense of urgency concerning Callen. Sam had just phoned, Deeks was conscious, breathing without problems and if nothing changes in the next twenty four hours, he'll have his fracture fixed the next day in the morning. It took a great dose of persuasion to keep Sam at the hospital, when he knew that Callen was at the Spanish mission; he wanted to strangle him in person.

Hetty was on her way back to L.A. probably in the shortest trip she made to the capital. She was happy for the latest news on Deeks and also more than worried about Callen even if as Nate assured her he couldn't be badly hurt if he had walked more than two miles from the dealer's house to the office. Anyway the anxiety was contagious and when he finally opened the door he needed to make an effort to slow down and keep calm.

\- "Nate!" – Nell nearly jumped at his neck.

\- "Hi Nell, what's up?"

\- "It's Callen, he is hurt."

\- "I know, Sam said it's a flesh wound. Where is he?"

\- "He's on the couch, sleeping I think, but I mean he is really hurt!"

\- "Nell, calm down, has the doctor checked on him?"

\- "Yes, of course, but… it's bad, Nate!"

\- "If the doctor didn't consider calling an ambulance it can't be so bad. Don't worry Nell."- he said, but in fact he was worried.

When Nate arrived to the couch he saw Eric sat as far as he could from the bulge under the cover. He gave the tech a sign and Eric stepped outside the space.

\- "I'm so glad you're here!"- he said relieved.

\- "Why Eric?"

\- "Callen is hurt."

\- "I know, Sam told me what happened."

\- "No, Nate, you don't understand, he was already injured! His back… geez! I don't know how he can even… "- Eric's eyes filled with tears.

\- "It's ok, Eric, don't worry now. Callen is here, he is safe, and the operation is over. Go with Nell, I'll stay with him."

\- "Thanks Nate!"

The agent sat on the chair opposite Callen and observed his breathing. It wasn't the peaceful breathing of someone sleeping; it was superficial, agitated and quick. He put a bottle of water on the table near the painkillers and helped himself some coffee as he thought about the different approaches he can use with Callen. One hour later he heard him, at first it seemed just a snore that became into a moan followed for some incoherent words.

\- "Sam… no… please Sam… I'm here… Sam…"

G's voice was raising full of anguish. He was trapped in a nightmare. Nate was more than aware of his sleeping problems, though he positively knew that he never spoke in dreams. Over the years he developed a sixth sense that prevented him from screaming or talking in dreams; undercover his survival had depended on it. And Callen was an expert in the matter.

\- "I'm here Sam, please… Sam… Sam"

G was more than distressed still in his sleeping. Now Nate started to understand that something was really wrong with him to cause this level of anguish. Callen moved his arms under the cover trying to get up, he was going to hurt himself, so Nate tried to hush him.

\- "Callen, it's ok, it's a nightmare, c'mon" – he said touching him just to find himself seconds later sat on the floor with a bleeding nose.

Still sleeping G had turned and sat up quick and he had his arms in the jiujitsu defense position. He was pale, sweating, his eyes still unfocused but ready to attack. The cover had fell and in spite of the pain in his nose Nate noticed the bruises on G's chest and how much weight he seemed to have lost.

\- "Callen"- he called softly as he sat again on the chair putting some pressure on the nose with a paper handkerchief.

G reacted to the movement but he was confused about where the sound came from. Nate could have a glimpse of the right side of his back and was taken aback.

\- "Callen!"- he tried loudly this time.

G woke up startled and dropped his arms in his lap. In a second he became aware of his surroundings and of Nate's nose.

\- "You touched me." – he affirmed- "I'm sorry"

\- "I should have known, it's nothing"- he said cleaning the remaining of the blood. He was lucky after all, if Callen wouldn't have been injured probably he would be the owner of a broken nasal septum.- "But you can't say the same thing"- he added signaling his arm.

Suddenly aware of his bare torso G took a white T-Shirt from the gym bag and with some difficulties put it on. Dizzy and cold he crossed his arms around his waist. The new wound was hurting bad and the shoulder was stinging and pinching, it was its way of welcoming to the party a headache that had come to stay. In addition he couldn't recall exactly what the nightmare was about, just that it implied Sam and it was bad. He shuddered.

\- "That bad eh?"- asked Nate.

\- "I can't remember."

\- "If you need to talk..."

\- "I said I can't remember!"- Retorted G just to add –"Sorry Nate, I don't sleep too much lately."

He supported his head between his hands and closed his eyes again, flashes and images still passing on his mind.

\- "You sounded like someone was being burned alive. You really need to rest Callen."

Suddenly G got up and went to his table; he started to toss around the pictures Anna had done and finally he found it.

\- "You're a genius Nate!"

\- "What? Well, I mean, of course, but..."

\- "Burned alive! You just found the connection."- he said putting the picture on his pocket.

\- "Ok, what connection?"- he asked still pressing the handkerchief on his nose.

Suddenly weak, G came back to the couch and sat slowly.

\- "Nate, I'm not in shape to go anywhere. You can take care of your nose and change your shirt. I'm sorry man."- He said weakly resting his head against the back and closing his eyes. He felt like crap.

Nate asked himself if it could be possible for Callen to inherit Hetty's powers. Oh man, even hurt and without pretending to do it he just guessed his thoughts. He didn't want to have him as a rival.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sam nearly jumped when Kensi opened the door of the waiting room. She approached his friend and sat at his side hugging his huge arm and leaning her head on his shoulder.

\- "He's ok, Sam, he is ok!"

\- "I told you! he is a thought nut to crack"- he said caressing her hair.

For a moment Sam closed his eyes overwhelmed by his feelings; on one hand he felt immensely relieved for the news about Deeks and on the other hand he surprised a hint of jealousy. Kensi had recuperated the love of her life and he had lost Michelle forever. In addition he was worried sick about G and he hadn't decided if he wanted to hug or to kill him. He was grateful for Nate being there, because, frankly, he didn't know how to deal with this situation.

Kensi knew too well Sam for not noticing his dark mood.

\- "Something is bugging you, big guy."

\- "It's G, he is hurt"

\- "I know, I'm sorry I need to talk to him, the other day I was so…"

\- "No, you don't understand Kensi, he's been shot this morning"

Kensi jumped on the chair and looked at Sam in the face, completely devastated.

\- "What?! Oh gosh, how… where is he, Sam? What are you doing here?"- she couldn't understand why Sam wasn't with Callen if he was hurt.

\- "Don't worry, he'll be fine. It's just a cut in the arm. He is with Nate and the wonder twins at the office. I don't think he wants me there right now."

\- "What happened, Sam?"

\- "This damn mission happened. G was about to go alone to a house where five members of the Molina cartel were hiding. I went with him, but in the last second he threw himself through a window landing in the middle of the party. I barely managed to get there in time to prevent them for killing him, and it was really a miracle he got out of there alive."

\- "Oh my God! Five! It was another trap!"

\- "Not this time. They were planning to escape and G prevented them from going. The house was near the Santa Monica airport. G finished the Molina cartel, Guillermo and Alberto Molina are dead as well as Rico Cabrera."

\- "So this is finally over? Really? Best news ever Sam! Anyway, if Callen is hurt why is not here at the hospital?"

\- "I let him at the ambulance and I drove here, when I arrived I couldn't find him. Apparently he ditched the paramedic and walked to the office, I can't figure out why. Nate is with him now."

\- "Don't worry Sam, he is safe, and this is over. We just need to sit together, to open some beers and to sleep for a week."

Sam smiled knowing that the picture was too perfect to just imagine it. He had still issues to deal with G before they could open a beer and drink happily as nothing had happened during the last nearly three months.

\- "They are preparing a room for Deeks and if everything is all right tomorrow they'll fix his fibula. I'm ok Sam, I appreciate you being here, but you need to go with Callen."

\- "I'll stay until Deeks is in the new room and you installed at his side. Then I'll go to try to talk to G. I only hope Nate will be able to put some order in his head."

\- "Be patient Sam, all this hit hard on him."


	76. Chapter 76

A.N.: Thanks for your nice comments! Now it's time to let Callen talk.

Chapter 76

When Nate came back to the couch he found that Callen had put his tennis shoes on and a black hood sweater that now seemed to be Sam's size. He was sat sideways without touching with his back the arm of the couch, with the legs laid out before him, his good arm supporting the wounded one not hiding his pain. He noticed that G had drunk nearly all the water and that the painkiller's container was open. The guy looked pale, dark circles below his eyes and for a moment he wondered if keeping him in the office without the care provided in a hospital was a good idea after all. Hetty will be there soon and her instructions were clear: she wanted him well and protected even from himself. To know how to help he needed to understand first- hand what had happened and why the team was in that situation. Nate decided to take advantage of G's vulnerability to make him talk.

\- "You don't want me to be here."

\- "No."

\- "You don't want to speak to me."

\- "No."

\- "But you asked Hetty to bring me here, why?"

\- "Because they need you."

\- "They?"

\- "Sam, Deeks, Kensi, Nell, Eric and even Hetty"

\- "Not you."

\- "No."

\- "Why they need me?"

\- "Because of what happened."

\- "Because of Michelle's death?"

\- "..."

\- "You think I can help them. How?"

\- "I don't know; you're the shrink."

\- "You must have seen something wrong to ask for me."

\- "Everything is wrong."

\- "Callen, I can't help if you don't help; since I'm here I've seen very difficult situations, nevertheless I lack the global vision you have. Hetty and Sam will be here in no time and believe it or not I really can help them to understand your reasons. I know you're tired and that you don't want to, but let me to help you, please!"

G was in fact tired. The headache was winning the battle against the painkiller and his arm was throbbing. Nate was right, he didn't know how to get back to his people and maybe they would listen to him. He gave a little nod as a signal, and his acquiescence made Nate to continue:

\- "Let's see, could you tell me what was wrong with Eric and Nell?"

\- "The wonder twins became the Siamese twins. It wasn't possible to work with them separately, they were afraid."

\- "They are a great team together."

\- "Yes, but I needed an analyst and a tech not two friends interfering in each other tasks."

\- "And you sent Nell to work with the agencies. Big task for someone so little."

\- "Size is a matter of perspective." – Callen repeated the lesson Hetty gave him- "I knew she could do it, but she didn't want to. She rather be in ops than accepting the challenge."

\- "Comfort zone"- said Nate.

\- "What's that?"

\- "The comfort zone is a situation in which you feel comfortable and you don't have to do nothing new or difficult, because nothing changes"- He explained surprised of Callen's ignorance.

\- "Everything changes all the time, the comfort zone doesn't exist."- assured G.

\- "It exists in people's minds, it's kind of a refuge. I'm sure even you have a comfort zone"

\- "...The library…" – thought Callen aloud.

\- "Good, that's it, a book never changes, it's a good comfort zone."

\- "Not if you read the book only once."

\- "Well...yes, in that case... anyway Nell did the job"- Nate hated when Callen did this to him. Even now, hurt, weak, with a headache and trying to collaborate he was able to fool him.

\- "Reluctantly, but yes."

\- "And Eric?"

\- "He was...lazy."

\- "Eric lazy? That's a first!"

\- "He wasn't going till the end of each issue because usually he had Nell to do it."

\- "What did you do about it?"

\- "I worked with him; I became his pain in the ass."

\- "Did he react?

\- "He saved Deeks' life."

\- "How, Callen?"

\- "He give me the information when I needed it, he was quick, focused and accurate. I miscalculated the time and Deeks got hurt, but Eric did great."

\- "Deeks... he'll be ok, the doctors said he'll make a full recovery."

\- "I know"- Callen didn't elaborate and Nate didn't want to push him further.

\- "Kensi told me you had disagreements with him. Why?"

\- "He didn't understand."

\- "What?"

\- "That he is as important as the others, that he is more than able of leading a team, that he is good with people and that he doesn't need to be always behind Kensi.

\- "You tell him all that?"

\- "He wouldn't listen. He was mad at me."- Callen touched his ear. The tic Eric was talking about, noticed Nate.

\- "Can I ask why?"

\- "Different opinion about Sam, not his business, neither yours."- answered G bending his knees putting the sole of the shoes on the couch. Another signal that Hetty wasn't around and that the subject was a sensitive one.

\- "Ok, sorry. And Kensi?"

\- "Kens was afraid and still is, of losing Deeks. She understands, she's a professional, but she needs her space. Sometimes she can't think with Deeks talking all the time. She needs silence."

\- "You know her well."

\- "She knows me well."

Nate smiled, the two friends in spite of her chaos and his austerity had a lot in common.

\- "Eric told me about a mission in Hawaii."

Callen laughed.

\- "Have you ever been sent to a holiday resort in Hawaii in a mission?"

\- "You sent them there."- guessed Nate.

\- "They needed it. Sam was alone with the kids, he needed help, and everyone deserved sometime free of crap."

\- "And you?"

\- "I couldn't go. Hetty…"-a lump in his throat made him to stop as he remembered the anguish of those days that seemed like a century ago.

\- "Hetty needed help. Why do you think that Hetty needs me?" – asked Nate.

\- "Each time she loses someone she run, we need her here."

\- "You need her."

\- "..."

G held his arm near his body, touched his ear again and closed his eyes, worrying Nate.

\- "Callen?"

\- "She is mad at me"- his voice came in nearly a whisper- "I broke the rules and she is blaming herself for letting me to lead the operation against the cartel. She thinks I'm wrong and that I overestimated my capacity of managing people and forces."- G paused- "She is right"- in a rapid gesture G wiped his eyes- "Now she is wondering about the chess and in what moment I became crazy just under her nose."

G put his forehead in the knees, the bad arm in his lap the good one surrounding his legs, like trying to making himself little. A contained moan came out of the ball Callen was forming now with his body.

\- "Are you ok? we can talk in another moment."- Nate didn't want to put even more pressure to an already painful situation.

\- "I'm not, but it won't be another moment."

\- "Callen, if you're in pain..."

\- "It's not so bad. What do you want to know?"

\- "I want to know how you are feeling."

\- "Tired."

\- "I can see that, but you know what I mean."- pushed Nate a little bit.

\- "I'm tired of fighting. All this time I thought I gave the best of me, I've tried everything in my power to do the best for my team, but I screwed it up and I don't deserve to have them. I apologized one hundred times… they didn't understand… my best is not enough… maybe it's true that I'm crazy."

\- "Callen… you know that this is not true, right?"

\- "…"

\- "Who told you you're crazy?"

\- "Who not?"- he laughed bitterly just to stop when a wave of pain hit him.

His breathing became irregular for a moment, and Nate let him some time to recover before changing the subject.

\- "You said that Sam also needs my help."

\- "Not anymore."

\- "Ha, ha, ha! Sam is the person who suffered the biggest loss of the team and you think that he is ok now?"

\- "No, he is not, but he doesn't need you. He is looking for answers you don't have."

\- "And you sent him to work in the streets, undercover, with perfect strangers."

\- "I sent him with people like him, who lost everything, who had nothing and that are able to survive."

\- "They gave him the answers."

\- "No, they show him the way, not the answers."

\- "Who needs Sam then, another shrink?"

\- "He… I used to think that he needed me, now I don't think so."

\- "Why? he is your best friend! I'm sure he needs you at his side, Callen!"

\- "He leaved me."- whispered G.

\- "What? He didn't leave you!"- Nate felt he was losing the control of the conversation as if he ever had it. G's pain exploded in anger and the little ball he was, became a dragon with blue fire in his eyes.

\- "You don't know anything, you let everybody to leave Deeks last night, you left him alone!"

\- "Deeks was in a hospital, intubated, with all the attention and care he needed! What are you talking about?"

\- "He is in a place he doesn't know, he is defenseless and you leave him alone! I thought you were here to help, but now I know I can't trust you."

\- "Grisha..."

\- "Don't!" – G cried standing– "Don't you dare!"- Tears of rage invaded his eyes and he stared at Nate showing him for a moment all the pain he was carrying- "How could you..."

Supporting his arm Callen ran out of the building letting Nate the familiar feeling of failure as each time he tried to reach him.


	77. Chapter 77

A.N.: Intense moments for G and the team. The truth is coming out and is hurting in the process. As always thank you!

Chapter 77

Since last day Hetty was in a roller coaster of emotions. The discovery of Callen's plan had let her sunk into deep meditations. During the long waiting hours at the airport she went over and over the operations against the cartel and she couldn't make any sense of the movements Callen made with the agencies as his chess pieces. She tried to play the game retrospectively and nothing. She was hoping for some coherence, something that could lead her to think that Callen had acted rationally. But nothing came to her.

The biggest surprise was the success of the mission and Nell and Sam's explanations. She recognized Callen's tenacity, he was sure of his plan and he executed it till the end even risking his own life. Sam was ballistic, he thought that Callen had a death wish, but she knew better, he didn't want to die; he was just ready to do it for Sam.

If Callen was acting weird she didn't understand Sam's behavior either. When he came back from Hawaii she was hoping he supported Callen, she thought that the two friends were going to become even closer, nevertheless it was quite the opposite with all the secret army. She never thought that Sam was capable of hurting Callen, she hadn't forgotten and certainly not forgiven his conduct.

During the fight back home Hetty tried again to understand the damn chess game. She displayed on the tablet's screen Callen's notes, this time adding the micro operations against the cartel. She could see the pattern now that all was over, the flux West-East, the well gear assembly the cartel had, it was just amazing to discover it without all the elements she had now, but the erratic movements Callen made with the agencies were disturbing, she was still missing something and she only could hope to find an explanation because she couldn't trust Callen as a team leader if she wasn't able to understand his actions.

The explanations could wait, his health, physical and mental, not, and in spite of Nate's reassurances she was worried.

She mentally noted to invest in technology to make the flights duration shorter, her gut was telling her she needed to arrive home as soon as possible.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

True to his word Sam stayed with Kensi until Deeks was installed in a standard room.

\- "Good to see you pal."

\- "Hey Sam"- Deeks' voice was still raspy and he seemed groggy.

\- "How're you feeling?"

\- "Alive"- he smiled.

\- "That's a good feeling. You need to rest now and get well as soon as possible."

\- "My leg…"- he coughed.

\- "Schhh I know, don't worry, is nothing, and you'll be as good as new in no time"- Sam patted his arm lightly.

\- "Sam…"-

\- "C'mon honey, you have to stop talking"- intervened Kensi offering him some ice chips.

\- "We'll talk tomorrow Deeks, try to sleep, you'll see how you feel better later"- reassured Sam.

\- "Sam, I need to talk to Callen."

Sam exchanged a quick look with Kensi who half shut her eyes as a kind of warning.

\- "I'll tell him to come to visit after the operation, don't worry, you'll talk to him."

\- "Can't wait…"- Deeks eyes started to close, the painkillers taking effect.- "Sam… tell him… thank you…"- he managed to say before drifted off.

\- "I will, buddy, I will."- said Sam putting a hand on Deeks hair.

Kensi arranged the sheets and stepped outside followed by Sam.

\- "Please Sam, I don't want him to be upset, he is still in bad shape."

\- "I know, don't worry. Are you ok if I go to the mission? G is here, I need to know first-hand that he is ok."

\- "Of course! Please keep me posted, and if I can do anything …"

\- "You take care of Shaggy. I'll try to come back later."

\- "Thank you Sam. Really"

Sam winked an eye and went out in big strides.

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Nate knew that G wasn't going too far away, probably just outside to have some fresh air, but he couldn't take any risk. Going to ops he asked:

\- "Eric, please, track Callen. Device 7."

\- "What? You lost him? Nate he is not ok, he can't be alone, besides, Hetty is going to kill us!

\- "Exactly for that reason I put the tracker on him. Knowing his reactions this was more than probable."

\- "All right, he is walking to the boatshed."- said Eric relieved –"I'm going with him."

\- "You go there to do what, Beale?"- asked Nate- "He really needs to be by himself to cool off; just keep an eye on him and let me know the moment he moves, ok?"

\- "Ok. Hetty's plane had landed twenty minutes ago, she'll be here in no time."

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Sam entered the bullpen with the same energetic strides which he went out of the hospital.

\- "Nell!"- he called.

\- "Hi Sam. How is Deeks?"

\- "Fine, resting in a room now."

\- "Good news at last."

\- "Yeah"- answered Sam distracted looking around- "Where is G?"

\- "He was here with Nate some minutes ago…"

Nate was descending the stairs when Sam nearly leaped on him.

\- "Nate, where is G?"

\- "Don't worry Sam, he is in the boatshed, I've put a tracker on him and Eric had eyes through the camera."

\- "Good. I'm on my way."

\- "Before you go we really need to talk, Sam!"

\- "We'll talk later."- he said Sam running again.

\- "Mr. Hanna! Watch out!"- protested Hetty who nobody knows how had appeared in the open space.

\- "Hetty! Sorry!"- exclaimed Sam- "G is in the boatshed!"

\- "Hello Hetty"- saluted Nate-"Don't worry about Callen, he had his arm stitched and he took some painkillers, he just need to rest now."

\- "Well, he can rest as much as he can at Dovecoat."

\- "Hetty, Sam, I talked to him and there are things you need to know before going there."- said Nate serious.

\- "You're worrying me, Mr. Getz. Let's go to my office."

Once there Hetty picked up the phone:

\- "Mr. Beale, please, connect the monitor to the boatshed, I want to see Mr. Callen"

\- "Hi Hetty. Callen is ok. He prepared a tea and drank it on the couch, at first he seemed angry and then just tired. Two minutes ago he went upstairs, pulled the bed down and he is there sleeping."- he explained showing the images.

Hetty sighed at the sight of Callen. There he was, lying on his stomach, still awake, pale and with bags under his eyes. Not a pillow under a blanket as she feared.

\- "Is any agent at the boatshed, Eric?"

\- "Yeah… Reynolds. One second I connect you."

\- "Mr. Reynolds"

\- "Hetty! The expenses note is on your desk, promised."

\- "I've seen it Mr. Reynolds. For now I've another request: have you seen agent Callen today?"

\- "Yeah! He is here upstairs. I helped him to bring and change the water container. He had his arm hurt and I think he doesn't feel well because he asked me to let him sleep upstairs. Do you want me to call him?"

\- "No, thank you, Mr. Reynolds. Please, remain there and under no circumstance let agent Callen go out the boatshed even if you have to use the force to keep him there. I want to be informed of any suspicious activity. Is that clear?"

\- "Yes Hetty. Should I treat him like a suspect?"

\- "You ought to treat him like the most dangerous criminal on Earth. With the maximal precautions to avoid his escape."

\- "Got it."

\- "Thank you"- she cut the communication and looked again at the screen. Callen had just covered himself with a blanket and closed his eyes. He looked exhausted. Then turning her attention to Nate and Sam she added: - "Now, Mr. Getz, we can discuss what you consider so important. Gentlemen, please have a seat."


	78. Chapter 78

A.N.: What can I say? I'm so grateful for your enthusiasm! Now, finally, the moment of the truth ;)

Chapter 78

Sam was restless and angry with G, Nate and Hetty.

\- "If you want to talk, I want to talk too. This bullshit has been going for so long that I can't wait one more minute. I'm going to bring G here and yes, we're going to talk."- he said standing up.

\- "Mr. Hanna, please sit down."- she turned the monitor and show him the image of Callen sleeping.- "I think that under the circumstances he deserves to rest. He is not going anywhere."

Sam sat reluctantly and unconvinced.

\- "And you, what that's so important that can't wait?"- he asked abruptly to Nate.

\- "It's Callen. He is about to break."

\- "What do you mean, Mr. Getz?"- asked Hetty afraid of hearing what she had suspected.

\- "I talked to him and he is hurt, Hetty, and I don't mean only physically, he had lost his balance, he felt betrayed by the people he loved and he doesn't understand the reasons."

\- "What?! You're kidding right? He said betrayed? He doesn't understand? Wow, definitely he lost it, because lately nobody understands him! He is not acting rationally!"- exclaimed Sam.

\- "I shouldn't have said "betrayed", abandoned is a more accurate term."

\- "Even worse, Nate, even worse. Because it is exactly how I feel."

Hetty remained silent looking at G sleeping in her computer screen.

\- "Sam, he thinks you let him alone this morning. He walked here under the rain, bleeding, thinking you let him on his own."

\- "You can't be serious! I let him in the ambulance and I went to the hospital, you know that!"

\- "I know, but he doesn't."

\- "Now you understand when I say he is not being rational!"- Sam was ballistic.

\- "He thinks that we let Deeks alone last night, and I suspect he went to the hospital to check on him."

\- "Nobody is allowed in the I.C.U."- said Hetty.

\- "I know, but he thinks we abandon Deeks in a hostile environment and defenseless."- said Nate.

\- "He is projecting his fears."- thought Hetty aloud.

\- "Yes Hetty, and more than that. The night we were at hospital with Deeks, Callen was in ER as a patient. Apparently he collapsed and he spent the night there hurt and alone. Kensi found his wallet and his alias' ID with the car's key. I think he escaped and went to look for the beggar he knows."

\- "Bugger"- Hetty interlaced her fingers and leaned the head, trying to control her emotions.

\- "I knew that Kensi's words would hurt him, but I never thought he could collapse because of that. Besides why he didn't call?! We were just right there!"- cried Sam.

\- "He thinks all this is his fault and that he doesn't deserve you."

\- "Well he is right, all this is his fault. Maybe he hadn't created the situation but he is lying. Besides he is jumpy, bossy, distant, unsupportive, and heartless. He acts crazy! He did everything to divide the team, he even messed up with my kid, for God's sake!" – Sam was desperate trying to understand all the nonsense.

\- "Sam… you know him better…"- started to say Hetty –"I agree that his decisions weren't appropriated and even disputable, but don't even doubt of his intentions…"

\- "I disagree with both of you"- said Nate- "I've just had a painful conversation with Callen and I assure you that he is more than rational. His decisions concerning the team were amazingly right showing not only his capacity to react under the most dreadful circumstances, but his love and care for all of you."

\- "You must be kidding now"- Sam got up of his chair and walked around the space.

\- "Sam, please, sit down."- asked Hetty signaling the chair- "Mr. Getz could you elaborate?"

\- "I asked Callen about all of you, one by one, and he did intuitively exactly what a psychologist would have done. He sent the team to Hawaii, to provide you and your family the support you needed. The bonds between you became stronger and you had time to process what happen to Michelle and to find a way to heal together. When you came back Callen was in charge of a huge mission and he needed his team to support him, but instead of individual professional agents he found a group of friends afraid of being alone."

\- "That's not true, Nate!"- protested Sam – "He managed to mess with everyone!"

\- "It is not, agent Hanna?"- asked Hetty.- "I saw Mr. Callen working for hours and hours with Eric and Nell, I saw every one of his decisions being questioned, and I don't mean about the operation, that's another matter, but even the simplest ones, by all of you."

\- "Callen gave each one of you what you need even if you didn't realize you needed it. He put a mirror in front of you and showed you your fears and gave you the tools to manage them. He knows you well."- added Nate.

Sam seemed to think about what Nate said for a moment and then he said:

\- "I can see what he wanted to do sending me with Sargent Ben and the secret army, but I don't buy it, Nate. I only needed him and he wasn't there, besides he lied to me. Several times."

\- "Listen Sam, the first time I met Callen he was permanently alert, always waiting for an attack and ready to repel it. It took me years to get to know a bit of him, mostly picking a true between two jokes, or thanks to the comments of third parties. Over the years I saw him getting fond of this team, to commit with a cause, with people, something that, to an extent, I didn't think he was able to, given his background. He got a house, he had some stability and he definitely found balance. Today I found the person I met ten years ago. Confused, lost, angry and anguished. But I can tell you one thing for sure: he is not lying."

\- "Well, he lied to me."- Sam was also confused and worried.

\- "When Mr. Hanna?" – asked Hetty.

\- "At first about silly things like the first day I came back; I asked him about the scar on his chin. He told me he had felt. G is like a cat, he never falls."

\- "But it was true! He felt on my house! The day of the burial, he collapsed on the toilet and I needed to patch him. Five stitches!"

\- "Why he collapsed, Hetty?"- asked Sam now worried.

\- "You tell me Sam! You two worked so hard all night to have everything ready for the burial after the terrible days you just passed, I think he overdid."

\- "Hetty, the moment I let Michelle at the coroner office a private jet even with a doctor on board was ready for me and I flew to meet my kids. I never had the occasion to properly thank you for that and all the attentions we got."

\- "Mr. Hanna, that afternoon I was getting drunk. I didn't do anything… oh bugger! I thought you two where together, but it was him who organized everything, the jet, the service, the people, the food, even the flowers! he was alone all the time!"- said Hetty understanding.

Sam was confused trying to recall the details of those days, he always thought that it was Hetty who took care of the details and he recalled, for the first time, that Callen got out of that exploding bus after him.

\- "You mean Callen was exhausted and collapsed. Why, when, how?"- asked Nate wanting to know.

\- "The day of Michelle's burial, just after the service in my car. He was hurt. The explosion. He had shrapnel in the back and arms, burns and scratches. Besides a broken rib."

\- "From the explosion?"- asked again Nate seeing how Sam had paled.

\- "He got shot the previous days. When he was looking for you, Sam, Khaled set an ambush with a shooter in the roof. Callen was shot in the back, the vest save him but he got a broken rib. And that's not all! At first we didn't know, but the earpiece broke inside his ear and he needed surgery in urgency that same day."

\- "Surgery! Oh God! I didn't know it! Another lie..."- he exclaimed horrified.

\- "But he phoned you, Sam. The moment he could talk even burning with fever he even begged me for a phone to call you."

\- "Yes, he phoned me, but he didn't tell me anything."

\- "Sam, did he explicitly say that he was in good shape?"- asked Nate.

\- "Not really, he was worried about me and the kids… he told me that he was tired and fed up with doctors. I just assumed that it was Hetty who wasn't ok… "

\- "And I wasn't, but I didn't want him to be alone with all that fever. He even blackmailed me: he wouldn't sleep if I didn't do the same!"

\- "That sounds to me like Callen" –said Nate.

\- "Indeed."

\- "He told me he was at your house, not in the hospital."- said Sam

\- "Because he was there. I sent a helicopter to look for the only surgeon I knew she could save his life and his ear."

\- "His life Hetty?"

\- "When I discovered the cause of his state he nearly got 108o he was unconscious and with the infection he had, I don't think he could have survived a trip to the hospital."

\- "That's the reason he wouldn't come to Hawaii, the reason of his silence!"- deduced Sam thinking over all the conversations he had with G and sadly beginning to understand his friend. His eyes filled with tears that he didn't try to hide.

\- "He couldn't fly with his eardrum perforated and the infection. He couldn't even stand at first!"

\- "That bad Hetty?"- asked Nate also surprised.

\- "Nearly two weeks of intravenous antibiotics, ear drops, vertigo attacks and nauseas. It wasn't bad, it was a nightmare."


	79. Chapter 79

A.N.: I took a while, but things started to solve...or not? Thank you for your comments, really, each day I woke up with the surprise that you're still there sharing the journey with me. I feel blessed!

Chapter 79

For a minute Hetty, Nate and Sam remained in silence immersed in their own thoughts. Nate was the first one to break it:

\- "If Callen was hurt and the team was still recuperating, why this mission, why the cartel after all this years? I really don't get it."

\- "I let Mr. Callen at home and I went to Washington to face the consequences of Khaled's release. I gave the order and Mr. Callen and Mr. Jones backed me up in order to know about Michelle's whereabouts. The tape with our conversation finished in the Secretary of Defense's desk and Edmond wants my head since… well this is another story."

\- "So all this is my fault…"- started to say Sam.

\- "No, my dear, is not. No point at feeling guilty; either Miss Jones, your partner and of course myself we'd happy with our decision."

\- "I still don't see the connection with the Molina cartel."

\- "Because I don't think it really exists, Mr. Getz! Instead of being home recuperating Mr. Callen passed three days on the streets, contacted that Sargent and created a plot to make believe everyone in Washington that the cartel was behind Khaled. Then he went to the capital and I don't know how he convinced Edmond that he could finish the cartel."

\- "And he was hurt again…"- said Sam remembering the first time he saw G giving his speech to the agencies.

\- "A cut in the eyebrow, more bruises and his ear festering; I even had to sedate him to come back to Los Angeles and he wasn't happy about that."

\- "Hetty, I don't understand, you said that Callen was hurt in an explosion, then in Washington, but that was months ago. The injuries I saw today were pretty recent."

\- "And I discovered the day Sam knocked Mr. Callen out"- said Hetty staring at Sam who this time hold her stare.

\- "Wow, wow, Sam did you attacked Callen? Really?"

\- "He gave a gun to my son for his anniversary. He was asking for it! and I didn't hit him hard."

\- "Maybe not, but you let him bleeding and with another vertigo attack. That's when I discovered he had been hurt. His shoulder… again I had to call a surgeon to stich him."

\- "How…?"

\- "I guess Mr. Deeks and Miss Blye could answer you that question, Mr. Hanna. I dealt with the consequences."- said Hetty looking again at the screen where Callen moved on his sleep. He was so pale! She just wanted to keep him safe, to tell him that all was over, to let him rest finally. - "Mr. Getz, you said Mr. Callen is about to break. What can we do? Could you treat him?"

\- "I don't think so Hetty, I broke the little trust he could have in me so I'm pretty sure that I'm not the right person to do it. For now I suggest an easy approach, let him know that you're there for him, that he can trust, that you understand, even if you don't."

\- "He'll know if we lie."- said Sam-"He needs some honesty and we need still some answers."

\- "Mr. Hanna, please, he is hurt."

\- "I know now, Hetty and I promised I'll take care of him…

A sudden noise on the patio and voices screaming interrupted the conversation.

\- "Callen! Where is Callen?! Don't touch me son of a bitch or I kick your ass! Callen!"

Hetty stood up and approached to the entrance.

\- "Miss Kolcheck! What is this about? Agent Alonso, please, I take care of her"- she said to the agent that was holding Anna.

\- "Hetty! Where is Grisha?"

\- "In the boatshed, sleeping. Come here, dear, you're shaking!"- Hetty showed Anna the computer screen with the camera on the boatshed.

\- "I need to speak to him."

\- "Get on the line."- said Sam.

\- "Miss Kolcheck, this is Mr. Nate Getz a member of this unit I don't think you know yet. He is our psychologist and he had some insights that can help to treat Mr. Callen right now."

\- "Psychologist? What? Hetty you're scaring me more than I am."

\- "Let's sit down on the couch and you can explain to us what is so scaring."

The group went to the bullpen, Anna sat on the couch next to Hetty, Sam did the same on the sofa and Nate got some water bottles, he didn't know about the others, but he was feeling slightly dizzy. Finally he sat on the chair ready to listen.

\- "Hetty, please, what is he doing in the boatshed? Is he arrested? Why is he sleeping?"

\- "He is hurt Anna"- said Sam.

\- "What do you think, that I don't know? Oh my gosh Sam, it was me who found him in that gross motel, bent by the pain, bleeding and with his back raw with the asphalt burns. You don't know what was like to clean the wounds, to take the dirt out, to cut the skin…"- her eyes filled with tears remembering Callen's suffering. – Hetty patted her hand as Sam rubbed his face with a hand. Anna continued:

\- "It wasn't the first time, the day of Michelle's burial I had to rescue him from a Mexican guy and two kids when he couldn't even stand. And then the injections, the drops that made him nearly scream… and even hurt he went to see me to Arkady's house when I got the concussion and Aran Mafur… this was the reason I broke up with him."- Anna looked around and noticed the faces of surprise of her interlocutors.

\- "You know nothing, don't you? Shame on you! And he calls you his family!"- she accused angry.

Nate felt the responsibility of telling her the truth.

\- "Miss Kolcheck, Anna, Callen was shot this morning."- Before she could say anything he added- "It's a flesh wound in the arm, he'll be ok, but he needs to rest. I think that even if we had now a pretty idea of what happen to him this last time, there're still unknown things that can help us to help him now."

Anna didn't listen; she didn't care about what Nate had to say or about reasons, not anymore, not with them, and Hetty could read her thoughts.

\- "Anna, dear, why did you come here?"

\- "I thought he would be here and after what he did I… I need to speak to him"

\- "What does he did this time?"- asked Sam.

\- "Today is my birthday and I've just received this and a bouquet of red roses"- she said handling a pink envelope to Hetty.

\- "Even if the circumstances aren't the best I really wish you a happy birthday. I'm sure you can celebrate it properly soon"- smiled Hetty opening the envelope.

She recognized G's neat calligraphy in the paper napkin and when she read, she understood Anna's reasons. She was crying.

\- "He really loves you."- said Hetty.

\- "And I love him."- Anna replied holding Hetty's hands.

Sam took the envelope from the couch and though about that morning, a scary idea forming in his head. What if…?

\- "I'm going to the car, I think that I may have another one of these…"

\- "Mr. Hanna you're not thinking… oh bugger!"

Hetty ran to her desk just to find in her secret drawer another envelope. For a second she looked at the screen. Callen had turned and he was now facing the camera still sleeping, his pale face contrasted with the back sweater. With trembling hands she opened the envelope and took the book that was inside.

\- "What's that Hetty?"- asked Nate curious and worried at the sight of Hetty's expression.

\- "De bello gallico, The Conquest of Gaul by Julius Caesar, Mr Getz."- Said Hetty opening the book. A small rose still fresh was pressed at the interior and three words wrote in Latin: Tibi gratias ago."

\- "And that's supposed to make sense to you?"- Nate and Anna were expecting for an explanation.

\- "This is a book from my personal library. Mr. Callen translated it from Latin when he was sixteen years old. He loved the story. And now is the answer I was looking for. The chess play; it was just a way of finding a pattern, a way of control. The idea behind to destroy the cartel is Julius Caesar's: divide and conquer. Brilliant."

\- "What he said to you in the note Hetty?"- asked Anna.

\- "Just "thank you" my dear."- Hetty was moved.

She sat in the couch and then saw another paper in the envelope; it was a letter with the Presidential Seal's letterhead signed by the Secretary of Defense exculpating Nell and Hetty for the actions leading to Khaled's liberation. Callen was the only one taking the blame and the responsibility upon his shoulders. Hetty tried to hide his emotions as Sam arrived running and stopped near Nate.

\- "Do you have something Hetty? Because I have his phones and another envelope..." – his eyes focused in something near the sofa – "wait… these are G's boots! What was he wearing when you saw him, Nate?"- all his alarms went on.

\- "Black sweater, white T-shirt, grey sweat pants and tennis shoes."

\- "Are you sure?"- Sam asked.

\- "One hundred per cent!"

\- "No, no, no, no… this can't be possible!" – Sam went to the screen and signaled G's image- "He is wearing jeans and boots!"

Hetty ran to the phone as Nate tried to find an explanation.

\- "Maybe he changed, Sam."

\- "Agent Reynolds, please go upstairs and check on agent Callen!"

\- "Do you want me to wake him up, Hetty?"

\- "Just open the door."

\- "That's weird, he is not here!"

\- "Agent Reynolds?!"

\- "I don't know how he could go, I swear, I was downstairs watching, he just vanished!"- the agent said, but nobody in the room was listening to him.

Anna went to the boatshed to check for herself just to find a tracker and a tiny open window in the roof, and Nate to ops to tell Eric and Nell in order to star searching, but Hetty and Sam knew better. Caressing the book cover Hetty sat heavily in her chair and Sam came back to the couch where the pink envelope was. He opened it and two metallic pieces came out: the recoil spring and the hammer pin of a Glock 17. Aiden's gun. Inside the envelope a picture and Michelle's message.

\- "Oh my God! G!"

Sam was trembling. Sat on the couch he reached for the black phone and read the texts he and Kamran had exchanged. His eyes filled with tears. Wrote in a rush, a single word in the interior of the envelope: "Sorry"

All this time accusing G of not being there for him and his kids, when, in fact, he'd done much more than he could ask for. Sam buried his head between his hands and cried.


	80. Chapter 80

A.N.: I Glad you like it ;) Another one. Lot of thanks!

Chapter 80

G would rather go in other circumstances, with no regrets and no hard feelings, he would had wanted to ask for forgiveness because even if it wasn't his intention he knew he had hurt the people he loved the most. He couldn't forgive himself for that, but that was another story.

Nate. How could him...? he understood nothing, he wasn't there and of course he didn't believe him. He wanted him to take care of the team, but now he doubted he could do it, because he didn't know them as he does. Anyway, not his problem. Not for now. Time to finish what he had started.

He rolled the window of the taxi down and let the rain and the wind to wet his face in an attempt to erase his line of thinking and find a new focus. Once in the hangar he paid the agreed amount, did the routine checking with the pilot and installed himself at the back.

He knew he had fever and an infection was the last thing he needed now, so without double thinking he pinched himself in the leg with one of the prefilled antibiotic syringes he had packed. The pain was getting worse, it was constant and dull even without moving. His body was asking him to stop and he would, eventually, when he'll do what he needed to do.

He drank another bottle of water, forced himself to eat a protein bar, swallowed two painkillers, put the belt on, covered himself with a blanket and tried to find a comfortable position to sleep through the more than 8,000 miles to his destination.

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Kensi was walking up and down the hospital corridor, waiting for Deeks to come out of the theater. He had slept all night long and except his complaints when a male nurse assistant went to tidy him up, he was ok, in fact better than expected. So far so good, but Kensi was restless. She knew that something was going on, because her team wasn't there with her. Afraid to phone she only prayed that Callen was ok, because she was sure he was the reason of their absence.

\- "Miss Blye, good morning. Any news on Mr. Deeks?"

\- "Hetty! How do you…? Never mind. He is still on the theater, they told me it won't take long, it's an easy procedure. How's Callen?"

\- "You know?"

\- "I know something is wrong with him because Sam is not here."

\- "Mr. Callen is missing. He left yesterday after a conversation with Nate that didn't end well."

\- "How Nate could let him go?! He is not ok, Hetty, he needs us even if he doesn't realize it. Geez! Can't we have a break?"

\- "It seems that Mr. Callen had been planning this for a while. You know that when he is focused, anything can't interfere with his plans. This time he let everything behind. Passports, credit cards, weapons… Eric and Nell are trying to locate him, but…"

\- "But if Callen doesn't want to be located they couldn't do it."- Kensi finished the sentence.

\- "He let something for you on your desk."- Hetty took a pink envelope off his purse.

\- "What? Oh Hetty this doesn't sounds good!"- she took the envelope and read the short message. Her eyes filled with tears as she handed it to Hetty.

"Thank you Kens, it was a pleasure to dance with you."

\- "This is not good, Hetty."

\- "No, it's not."

\- "Family of Martin Deeks"- a voice called.

\- "Yes! Here!"- Kensi stepped forward.

\- "We finished and everything went as well as planned. If there're no complications he'll be able to go home in two days."

\- "Thank you, thanks doctor, these are good news."

\- "Very good news indeed, thank you doctor"- added Hetty.

Minutes later a still sleeping Deeks was installed again in his room.

\- "Hey baby!"- Kensi caressed his disheveled hair and kissed him.

\- "He'll be sleeping for a while, Kensi, why don't you take advantage and go to eat something? You need to stay fit if he is going home soon. I'll take care of him."

\- "Thank you, Hetty."

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Sam spent the night working trying to figure out where Callen could be. Nate told him about a connection and a picture. Not too much to start, but even if he passed the rest of his life searching for him he was resolute to find G. First Sam cleaned his desk trying to put order into piles of files, data, notes, some of them in Russian, others in Spanish. Letters, numbers, circles, spots, agencies, math equations, satellites, military movements, all was there in a chaotic nonsense that Nell tried to explain. That was huge, hours and hours of work, too much for anybody, definitely an incredible effort. He never doubted his friend's capacity or intelligence, but that was just overwhelming.

With his head still spinning Sam went to G's house. Nothing had changed since the last time he was there with Sargent Ben. This awkward sensation of emptiness still there, it was like… oh no! Sam suddenly understood. G had never come back home since Michelle's kidnap. The dust, the half read book, the garbage can… this house was part of G's new roots and now he had lost even that. No family, no girlfriend, no house… this only could mean no reason to come back.

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Anna entered in her father's house like a bat out of hell.

\- "Arcady! Daaad!"- she called.

\- "What is this scandal my beautiful daughter?"- answered Arkady hanging the phone.

\- "I need your help. And I need it now."

\- "Always hurry, hurry, you're young and impatient but patience is a good virtue. I bet my friend Callen is again behind this, but listen to me, if this kid is still making you cry, I swear…"

\- "Dad! He is missing! I need your help to bring him home!"

\- "Now I need a vodka. Or maybe two!"

Father and daughter passed the following hour elucubrating, tracing plans, calling contacts and promising business. Arkady's not very legal network started to move with an only aim: to find Callen.

That day Anna decided to stay in her opulent room with the silly hope of seeing Callen climbing the wall again for her. She was angry with Sam, Kensi, Deeks, the geek robots and even with Hetty and this new and goofy guy. How could they leave Grisha alone? He did everything for them, he sacrificed his career, his liberty, his health and they left him alone!

Once she finished of killing some zombies with the console, she realized that in fact she was angry to herself, because she was as guilty as the others. The fear of seeing him hurt, of losing him made her to push him out of her life when he needed her the most. She just wanted to keep him safe and she cut the anchor of his boat.

Wiping a rebel tear she read again the nonsense list G made for her:

\- "I like the way you get dirt when you eat ice cream"

\- "I like that you're stronger than me"

\- "I like how you curse in Russian"

\- "I like your laugh"

\- "I like your singing out of the tune in the shower"

\- "I like your Lego elephant"

\- "I like your blunt sincerity"

\- "I like how you understand without words"

\- "I like how you want to go first with the green light at the traffic light"

\- "I like that you are passionate"

\- "I like the way you wipe your eyes when you're sleepy"

\- "I like that you keep me safe"

\- "I like your courage"

\- "I like the way you care"

\- "I like your endless and silly jokes"

\- "I like your serenity"

\- "I like the way you clean your gun"

\- "I like that you cry with Christmas films in August"

\- "I like how you hug me"

\- "I like you steal the book I'm reading"

\- "I like your independency"

\- "I like your goodness"

\- "I like the fact that I can continue writing this list forever. Please don't change ever. Be happy."

It was the statement of a five years old, simple, direct even naïve. And at the contrary all the man she dated he didn't talk about her body or the way she looks, he talked about her. Period. It was the most beautiful love declaration she could ever dream of. He was maybe crazy, yes, but she was crazy about him.


	81. Chapter 81

A.N.: The circle is closing, the pieces are fitting in and Callen... ;) thanks a lot for your nice comments and your wonderful support!

Chapter 81

It took two days for G to arrive to hell from Khartoum. The contact Alex Hemsley gave him opened the doors he wanted on the Sudan's capital and the information he needed arrived relatively quick. The man he was looking for was a well –known terrorist disguised as a member of the government.

For a long time he had just the picture of two men sat in a car that Anna took in Little Ethiopia and blurry nightmares, then he added the identification of Mario Alberto Suárez, the Mexican guy, later he got a name, Mohamed Shana. Without pretending Nate gave him the cue to remember: burned alive, like Sam's friend, the C.I.A. agent Michael Saled. Some nights bad dreams about the time he had to identify his body believing it was Sam's, still haunted him. Mohamed Shana was there, outside the morgue smoking and laughing. Callen always knew that his face was familiar. Now he had a story: the man was sent undercover by the Sudanese government to the U.S.A. to get weapons and recruit volunteers to join a suicide army against South Sudan in the area of South Kordofan. He used to work with Khaled and he enjoyed the benefits of an occidental life in an underdeveloped country. Finally, today, he had a location, a place in hell, because officially the war was over, extra-officially he was going to a territory where a human life was worth less than a fake dime.

Money was a powerful tool and well used in a country like Sudan could make things happen very fast. G knew how to use it and with great astonishment of his contact, he got a diplomat passport and safe-conducts to get into the conflict area. It was always useful to have a friend with a friend that had a friend who used to know someone with special a talents. From there only U.N. Blue helmet soldiers could help him to come back home if at this point that was possible.

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\- "So, how was it?- asked Kensi to a very pale Deeks entering in his hospital room.

\- "Painful!"- he protested- "He poked me here and take out more than two liters of blood"- he said signaling a band aid on his arm- "I suspect he is a vampire."

\- "How could you be such a moaner? It's just a blood test and if everything is ok in some hours I'll drive you home."

\- "I can't believe it, really, even with this splint I'm the luckiest man in the word"- he said hugging Kensi's waist and leaning his head on her stomach. His voice was still raspy, side-effects of the ventilator, he still coughed and the little burns stung, but overall he felt fine.

\- "And I'm the luckiest woman in the world!" –she replied kissing his golden curls. – "By the way, if you want your mum's lasagna it's time you find an excuse to call her, because I'm not cooking."

\- "What?! You're letting me starving, alone and defenseless?"

Kensi pulled out of the hug and turned her head to the window suddenly moved.

\- "Hey Kensi, it was a joke, c'mon! we can always call for a pizza or something…"

She turned not hiding her tears.

\- "Sweetie! What happen? Come here, please"- he extended his arm and Kensi held his hand and sat on the bed at his side - "It's ok, you can tell me, I'm ok and I know that something is bugging you. What about your "no more secrets"? just tell me, please"- he added caressing her hair.

\- "It's something Nate told me about Callen…"

\- "What? is he worse? Sam told me he was shot."

\- "No, well, we don't know. He left three days ago and we can't find him."

\- "Oh my… but why? I mean, the operation is over and he is hurt… it doesn't make any sense!"

\- "But it does Deeks! The day before the doctors took you out the ventilator, we went home to rest. You were in intensive care and the visits are forbidden the night. Nate told me that Callen sneaked into your room just to have your back."

\- "What? Why? I mean I was in a hospital drugged to the gills…"

\- "You were alone, defenseless in an unknown and hostile territory."

\- "My God!"

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\- "Anna, мой маленький цветок (my little flower), I don't want you to celebrate yet, but I may have something about Callen's whereabouts."

\- "What? That's good news! I've already read all the passengers list of five countries for the next three days and nothing; what do you have?"

\- "It's a long shot. Some years ago Callen went to Sudan in a N.C.I.S. mission, and you know, in a country like that one usually the unofficial channels are more useful that the official's ones. We talked about that and I remember to have mentioned a friend of a friend that used to know someone that…"

\- "Arkadyyyy!"- shouted Anna.

\- "Ok, ok, well is a man that for the right amount of money can fake any document in no time."

\- "A good contact."

\- "Of course! I only have good contacts. It's important for business."

\- "So… have you contacted your contact?"

\- "Well, my friend told me that his friend… ok, he did two diplomatic passports for an European that matched Callen's description."

\- "European?"

\- "He spoke Russian and French."

\- "It's a long shot."

\- "It is."

\- "And this friend of yours… of your friend didn't remember the name of the passports?"

\- "Charles de Batz, from Paris and Dmitri Jvorostinin from Moscow, and before you asked me, no, I don't have a picture."

Anna jumped from her chair and before start running she kissed his father on the cheek.

\- "Sometimes you're the best!"- she said going out in a hurry.

A silly smile lightened Arkady's face.

\- "I own you one Callen, my friend."- He murmured happy for the first kiss of his daughter.

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The little plane landed without incidents at the dusty rough and ready airport. It was really hot and the thermic shock in addition to the pain in his ear was too much for Callen that stopped dizzy in the nearly inexistent hangar.

\- "White man, you, white man! This way. This is not safe!"

\- "I need to go to the U.N. peacekeeping camp."

\- "You need to survive first. Can't you hear the bullets?"

In fact Callen barely could hear anything but the damn buzzing that lately was getting worse. He breathed in and followed the pilot. Even if his hearing wasn't good he had enough experience to distinguish the unmistakable glitter of the weapons behind the rocks. I was a matter of time the forces took the plane. G got his gun ready and ran after the man who was waving in the middle of the so called road. A ramshackle jeep arrived and he got in the rear seat; as soon as the pilot was installed they followed the bumpy path that supposedly was the main road.

\- "The camp is ten miles away at the other side of the border following that road, but the rebels from the South are advancing in an attempt of controlling the water supply that the North is poisoning."- explained the driver.

\- "And the U.N. allows that?"- asked Callen.

\- "They are a bunch of kids trying to manage a camp with thousands of people without the means to do it. The only law around here is the survival of the fittest."

G was feeling everything but fittest. The jeep jumped again and G swallowed two painkillers unable to bear the pain. He was still dizzy, he only hoped to find that man before his energies vanished. Two hours later it was getting dark and the beautiful spectacle of the African sunset was eclipsed by the feeling of an imminent danger. The border was at the other side of the trees, just two miles ahead. Suddenly something moved, maybe an animal, but G started to pump adrenaline, his gut telling him that something was wrong, very wrong; he tapped the pilot's shoulder to warn him when a big explosion just in front of the car caused the driver to lose the control of the vehicle. The front wheel crashed into a rock and the jeep flew before smashing some meters away.

The impact threw Callen in the air, he didn't know how but he managed to roll to the side of the road where he laid out of breath and hurting all over.

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Hetty was losing hope of finding Callen. She trained him until he became not good, but the best agent in undercover work. This wasn't a tantrum or an escape this was a mission, a mission that only he knew about because nobody took the time to listen to him even less to help him. Sam was about to blow a fuse, he wanted to fly to Mexico and comb the country to find G, but as Hetty wisely remembered him, he could be on the other side of the world or even just under their noses. Desperate to do something he found a way to focus his energy in G's project: the secret army, and in three days of knocking doors, asking for favors and collecting money, he did for that people much more than the government in years. He hadn't any intention of stopping, maybe a foundation could be a good plan for the future. It was his friend's idea and he knew that G would be proud. Hetty encouraged him, in an attempt of minimize his anxiety, but the fact was that the mood of the team was more than pessimistic. When she received Anna's call asking her if Callen was able to speak French –"Like a native, my dear"- she asked her to pass by the office. The news, bad or good, had to be faced and she preferred to be sat on her own chair.

\- "Hetty, maybe is nothing, as Arkady said is a very long shot."- explained Anna sitting in front of her desk.

\- "What do you have Miss Kolcheck?"

\- "An European matching Callen's description speaking Russian and French who paid for two fake passports and safe-conducts to..., well, a friend of a friend…"

\- "Yes, of a friend who knows someone. I get it. Where exactly?"

\- "Khartoum"

\- "Oh Lord. That makes sense. After all you told me about the Sudanese connection our probabilities increase. Anything else?"

\- "The names of the passports, that's all. The French one is Charles de Baltz and the other one, Dmitri Jvorostinin"

Hetty started to laugh.

\- "Miss Kolcheck, you just poke yourself with the needle in the haystack. You found Mr. Callen!"

\- "How do you know, are these his alias? But in that case why he left here his passports?"

\- "Charles de Baltz-Castelmore more known as D'Artagnan, the fourth musketeer. Mr. Callen loves this book. On the other hand Dmitri Jvorostinin is a Russian General of the XVI century who passed his life going from a difficult mission to complicated one."

Both women smiled, but then Hetty became serious.

\- "The only reason we know about that is because he is joking, he doesn't care if we track him; he has three days of advantage, probably more than he needs to do what he wants to do."

\- "To find the man on the picture."

\- "Yes, to find the man and to eliminate the threat."

\- "Hetty why do you say he doesn't care?"- asked Anna worried.

\- "Because he knows that the moment we get there he would be death or in his way home."


	82. Chapter 82

A.N.: Each morning when I check the web and I see your comments you give the strength to keep writing. Lately it's not easy with my crazy schedule, but you deserve a proper end and I'll try to honor that. I try to reply each comment I receive, unfortunately I can't do it if you're not registered. Anyway "Guest", thanks a lot :)

Chapter 82

Holding his breath G hid at the side of the road. A group of five soldiers approached the jeep and before he could react they killed the driver and the pilot to steel some cigarettes and chocolate. Then they started to shot the bodies just to have fun, laughing out loud. No pity, not an ounce of humanity. Out of the corner of his eye G saw it, a trickle coming from the car, gasoline! he didn't dare to move, even to breath, and, all of a sudden, the jeep exploded. Pieces of shrapnel and fire flew around him and for a moment G thought that it was the end. Still on the side of the road with the arms protecting his head, all he could hear was the loud ringing of his ear, little by little the dizziness and the pain won the battle.

When G came to he didn't know how much time he'd been out of combat. It was completely dark and he was freezing. Not far from where he was he heard something, a rustle, probably an animal, then a whimper. Carefully he approached the burning skeleton of the jeep, the spectacle was Dantesque. Human remains, blood, weapons, little fires and in the middle of all that someone was crying. G saw him, one of the soldiers seemed trapped under a sheet of metal, a pool of blood wetting the dry soil. He approached cautiously, gun at ready, but soon he noticed not only that the soldier wasn't a threat but that he was a child, a child dying. He kneeled at his side, there was nothing he could do to save his life, just to be there for him. The kid was trying still to get up ignoring that his legs had gone with the explosion.

G put a hand on his chest to prevent him from moving and took his hand.

\- "Schhhh, it's ok, it's ok. What's your name?"

The kid soldier, crying, managed to whisper:

\- "Anthony from Agok. Hurts..."

\- "I know, Anthony, it's ok to rest, close your eyes, it's going to be ok...that's it... sleep..."

G remained at his side till the end, cursing the injustice; it was just a kid! then he took the body to the side of the road and carried stone after stone to bury him. Anthony. A Christian name in a land where that mattered. With two sticks he made a cross and he engraved his name and the name of his little town. He thought about his own childhood and he felt fortunate; why it has to be so hard to be a child? When he finished his hands were covered with blood, all his body hurt, but he ignore it. He recovered the still operating weapons and walked to the border. Exhausted, he managed to dodge another party of soldiers and he arrived to the camp with the first lights of dawn.

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The pizza party to celebrate Deeks' release from the hospital had the atmosphere of a funeral.

Last night after a chat with Nate, Nell appeared at Eric's door to borrow once more his Spiderman pajamas. Thanks to her privileged memory she remembered each one of her conversations with Callen, his patience, his way of challenging her, without letting her alone. Overall she was aware that her job produced the desired results, but she felt no proud. She knew that she hadn't given her usual one hundred per cent and that her attitude wasn't correct.

Eric wasn't in better shape when she arrived. Unable to sleep, he only wanted to stay in ops trying to locate Callen, but Hetty didn't give him the choice. All that time spent with G working, all the questions, the explanations the way of going over and over the same things, at that time it was a nightmare, but at the end it became another way of challenge and he loved being challenged. He shared pajamas, anguish and cookies with Nell, happy to have her, but knowing that they could only be stronger together if they were strong as individuals.

When Nate told Deeks the details about what had happened with G, he only could think about his resounding failure, not only as an agent but as a person. He now knew that Callen tried to be there for everyone and he felt like an idiot for having asked for explanations. He didn't listen and because of his stupidity Callen got even more hurt. Then he saved his life and he needed to tell him. He was glad to have Kensi at his side even though he knew that things weren't easy for her, he only hope that Hetty could find Callen before it was too late.

The pizza was getting cold on the table, but nobody cared.

\- "I only say that you're being very hard on yourselves"- tried the psychologist.

\- "C'mon Nate, I knew that Callen was hurt and I did nothing!"- said Kensi.

\- "Kensi…"- he tried again only to be interrupted by Sam.

\- "We were getting weak as a team and G saw it. He did what he needed to do and we weren't there for him. That's a fact, Nate."

\- "You didn't have the information, you didn't know!"

\- "With a friend you don't ask questions, and I did it, more than once"- replied Deeks.

\- "Ok, ok, I see your point, but feeling guilty is not going to help him back, so try to think positive."- tried Nate again.

\- "What would Callen do if he were here right now?" – asked Nell with a conspiratorial smile.

\- "To eat that pizza!"-answered the other four as Nate laughed.

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The vision of a white man covered in blood freaked out the blue helmet in guard. He gave the alarm and, soon, Callen found himself surrounded by a little army. The General running the camp was in his way after another incursion from the Sudanese on the protected area; just a normal day in this part of the world, forgotten for everyone. G's French passport worked as a charm and he earned the privilege of some water to drink and to tidy himself. As best as he could he cleaned his wounds, injected a dosage of antibiotic and took advantage of being alone to sleep a bit. He felt like crap.

It was already noon when the tired General talked to G:

\- "So, French"- It was an affirmation more than a question and G added at his English the unmistakable Parisian accent.

\- "Yes. Thank you for letting me in. Things are really though out there."

\- "They aren't better in here, believe me. I supposed that you're not here to bring us the promised medical supplies. This camp was built for three hundred people and we're more than one thousand, most of them women and children and all of them in poor conditions."

\- "I'm sorry sir, I'm here looking for a man, Mohamed Shana"- said G showing him the picture and automatically perceiving the hostility of his interlocutor.

\- "Can I ask why?"- the General's eyes were barely two lines.

\- "To prevent him to keep killing"- answered Callen holding the stare.

\- "Well, I guess you arrived too late…"

\- "What do you mean?"

\- "That bastard was killed yesterday night by the troops from the South when he tried to pass a cargo of weapons to the soldiers from the North."

\- "Are you sure of that, General?"

\- "I signed the transfer of the body to Malakal. There're people there that need also to know that the terrorist is gone for good."

\- "How can I go there?"

\- "To Malakal?"

\- "I need to see the body. I need to be sure that we're talking about the same bastard."

\- "A man with a mission, aren't you?"

\- "Exactly."

\- "Well, you're lucky. We're expecting the aircraft with the weekly provisioning; I'll try to get you a place in there."

\- "Thank you General. I really appreciate that."

\- "Send my regards to the Eiffel Tower, I'll probably die without seeing it."

\- "I'll do it."

True to his word the General provided Callen not only with a place in the plane, but with a soldier not older than twenty as escort, in charge of opening the doors for him.

G knew he had fever, in spite of the antibiotic he was getting worse and he didn't know why. If the cadaver wasn't Mohamed Shana's he'd need to find a place and try to recover before starting the chase. Because one thing was for sure, he'd never come back home until Sam and his family were safe. He made a promise and he was willing to fulfill it.


	83. Chapter 83

A.N.: Hey you there! I'm back after a weekend in the mountains without computer. As always thanks a lot for your reviews :)

Chapter 83

In spite of the pain in his ear caused by the pressure, G was more than happy of having a place in the small plane to go to the city. The absence of roads and the presence of soldiers made the travel by land impossible in a straight line and the detour meant to cross again the border to Sudan a to drive for more than eighteen hours to re-enter later in South Sudan.

Malakal, not very good souvenirs from there; the city that had been overran for both sides, North and South, since the conflict started back in 2005, and even up to twelve times two years ago. In other circumstances the banks of the White Nile would be a nice place to live, now it was difficult to find a building standing. So sad what the human race was capable of doing.

The flight was short but it lasted enough to let G drained. With no time to recover he followed the soldier to the military post of control where they managed to get a vehicle after some of his money changed hands. The drive to the morgue was a ride to hell. Destruction and desolation seemed to be the only scene and G felt that the landscape matched his soul. The sooner the better, he needed to check the identity of the body and to think on his next step.

Finally they arrived to a suburb, if such a thing like the suburb of a suburb could even exist. G discovered a shooter in a nearby shack and followed with the sight the movement of two suspect men. He wished to have something to cover his head, his white skin made him the perfect target. The soldier stopped the car near an improvised tent where a short man dressed in khaki appeared to receive them. G showed his passport, the soldier let him do the talking.

\- "Good morning. Charles de Batz. I'm here to see the body of Mohamed Shana."

\- "Suleyman Oumbala"- he said without shaking hands- "Why exactly, if I can ask?"

\- "Just to verify his identity."- Muslim name, probably he was sympathetic to the North- G thought. He decided he didn't give any information to this man.

\- "Did you know Shana?"

\- "Enough questions or should I show you again my identification!"- exclaimed G who out of the corner of his eye saw another man entering the building. He didn't like the nor the tone nor the place, and he could tell the soldier was also nervous.

The little man took his time before answering.

\- "This way." – he said leading the way to a small adobe building.

The room that served as a morgue was just an infect hole. It was hot, the only mission of the ceiling fan, obviously insufficient to freshen the air, seemed to be spreading the stench of the stacked bodies, and suddenly Callen felt hard to breathe. It was not the first time he had to visit a filthy morgue even in harder circumstances, but this time his stomach was rebelling. The man gave an order and two armed men went to look for the cadaver. Some eternal minutes later, the body was placed in a wobbly plastic table that worked as a gurney.

Callen approached followed by the soldier and the little man who handle him a plastic bag with some objects.

\- "His belongings; and now hurry up. Don't touch anything. You see the body, you go. We don't want you here."

G stood there. Finally he had found Mohamed Shana, but he had no way of verifying it; his fingerprints weren't registered in any database. Callen took a look to the bag with his wallet and possessions. No I.D., no money, nothing there. He approached to the body. No injuries, no rigor mortis, nothing. Ignoring the menaces of the little man and the cries of the soldier G registered the pockets of the pants and found nothing neither. That man could be just anyone. All this trip in vain.

Disregarding the warnings G checked the pocket on the shirt, a crumpled cigarette paper, nothing more. The little man grabbed G's hurt arm, but he just shook the intruder hand off. G examined the little piece of cigarette paper, nothing more and nothing less! Callen's heart started to bump at full speed, the brand on the paper, Faros, a Mexican one. He had found his man!

Suddenly a crazy idea crossed his mind, what if Mohamed Shana wasn't dead? What if he was just pretending? There're drugs that could do that. G's thoughts worked at the speed of light. The soldier was arguing with the little man, but G didn't care. Before someone could prevent him from doing it, G took the gun he carried on the small of his back and put it on the body's temple ignoring everything else; the man and the soldier were screaming now, both aiming each other with their weapons.

For a second G thought that if, in fact, Shana was alive to shoot him would be worse than an execution, it would be the murder of a defenseless and maybe innocent man and he would need to learn to live with that. Michelle. He promised. Without further thinking G pulled the trigger. The small caliber bullet opened a hole in the body's skull. No blood, the man was already death.

Shaking and suddenly wet with a cold sweat G leaned over the improvised gurney in an attempt to keep his composure. He closed the eyes for a second and that's was exactly the time that the little man needed to deliver a hard blow on his forehead that made him fall. The man had used his weapon as a baseball bat and was screaming hysterically, the young soldier screamed even more and overcome by fear, shot the man repeatedly.

A sudden silence only broken by the noise of the dirty fan invaded the room.

G, kneeling beside the table tried to get up. He was bleeding for a cut in the left side of his forehead. Voices, people coming, he needed to get out of there. Now. The soldier went to his side and pulled him up roughly. Out of the corner of his eye G saw something hidden in Mohamed Shana's sock, a folded paper, a picture. He picked it up and, stumbling, followed the soldier to the exterior by the back door and they ran as fast as they could, chased by the men of the morgue. The voices were approaching, G turned his head to locate them but the blood blinded his left eye. The soldier pulled his bad arm, it hurt, but he focused on the pain to run faster; the deaf noise of the bullets flying joined the voices. They ran in zig-zag trying to raise a curtain of dust with the boots. G skidded and fell, his knee unable to keep the rhythm. Covered with dust he started coughing, it was hard to breath. The soldier grabbed again his arm and cried something G couldn't hear. He got up and ran again. He could feel the whistle of a bullet a scarce centimeters of his head. His lungs were burning screaming for fresh air, his knee failed again and G knew that he couldn't keep running much longer. The soldier pointed at something that G couldn't see, he was running for his life which at that moment wasn't worth a dime. A stabbing pain in his back made the task of breathing nearly impossible and just when G believed that he was going to collapse a car made his appearance. Without any care the young soldier pushed him inside and jumped after him landing on his back. The pain was so intense that Callen passed out.

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\- "Hetty, do you really think that Callen is there?"- asked Nell worried seeing one more time the images of a remote U.N. camp in the border of South Sudan on the light table in ops.

\- "It's a chance, yes. There's no phone, no internet, no way of communicating directly from here with the camp, but I had already contacted the High Commissioner and asked him to confirm us the information as soon as possible."

\- "But there's nothing in that area and even if the border was fixed after the war, the conflict is still on."- insisted Nell.

\- "Mr. Callen knows the country and the risks, Miss Jones, if he is there I can assure you he has his reasons."

\- "Are you sending Sam and Kensi to look for him?"- Eric's eyes were begging her to do so.

\- "If Mr. Callen is in Sudan I'm sure that he had found a connection with Khaled, the last thing he would want is Mr. Hanna there. And Miss Blye needs to take care of Mr. Deeks. No, the moment I have the confirmation I personally go to bring him here."

\- "Do you believe he is fine, Hetty?"- asked Eric searching for reassurance.

\- "I hope so, Mr. Beale, I really hope so".


	84. Chapter 84

A.N.: Crazy week this one, I'll do my best to update everyday, but I promise nothing. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this one, and as always thank you :)

Chapter 84

The hopes and moods of the team were in a roller coaster and Sam specially was getting desperate. Again and again he went through all the transcriptions of the interrogations that the C.I.A. made and nothing was making sense. He lacked the information to link the dots and the anxiety didn't help. Kamran called him every day at first with silly excuses and then asking openly about her uncle G. Sam finished by telling her that he was in a mission, he didn't had the heart to tell her the truth. That day she didn't have call, instead she had written a text to the burner phone that made Sam head to Hetty's desk.

\- "Hetty, I'm going to Sinaloa."

\- "What for Mr. Hanna?"

\- "I think G could be there."

\- "At Mexico? I seriously doubt it."

\- "I need to speak with the last detainees of the Molina cartel. After the operation was over here, the cascade of detentions continued at Mexico, more than fifty dealers have been imprisoned and I think that there is a big chance that G is doing the following, you know, being thorough."

\- "Sam…"

\- "Listen Hetty, with or without your help I'm going there."

Hetty read the determination in Sam's eyes. She knew that the probabilities of G being at Mexico were negligible, but Sam needed a purpose and better Mexico than the lion's den of Sudan.

\- "You have three days Mr. Hanna. I can facilitate you a pass to go to the prison and a contact in the Police department."

\- "Thank you Hetty"- said Sam relieved.

\- "You'll report every day at six pm, the moment you don't I'll sent the cavalry, understood?"

\- "Loud and clear."

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\- "How're you doing Deeks?"- asked Nate looking attentively at the figure lying on the couch hugging a pink cushion.

Monty sat at Nate's side shaking his tail happily. Still in no shape to going out the house Deeks passed his time from the couch to the bed and vice versa. In other circumstances the inactivity would drive him crazy, but he was still feeling weak and the meds made him sleepy. Finally he gathered the courage of calling his mum who will go at lunch time, and taking advantage of Nate's presence he made a reluctant Kensi go to the office. Her taciturnity made him understand that she needed some space to clear her ideas and the more pressure he put to make her talk the more she shut herself down.

\- "So?"

\- "Better each day, I guess."

\- "But?"

\- "But this situation, Callen missing, Kensi not talking and everyone worried …"

\- "It's normal to be worried, the circumstances aren't, and Kensi is very attached to Callen."

\- "I know, sometimes I wonder if they communicate telepathically because neither of them talk too much."

\- "You know that Kensi talks, maybe not when you want her to do it, but she does, Deeks. Callen, on the other hand, acts, and let his acts talk for him."

\- "Yeah, the problem is to understand his ways."

\- "How do you feel about Callen?"

\- "The things we said and we didn't say to each other, well, I mean, it's not easy."

\- "No, it's not, you're right."

\- "I want him back and safe and the opportunity of thanking him for saving my life, and being here doing nothing to find him is driving me crazy."

\- "I think that Callen understood that there's something that you can do in his absence, something that you didn't ever consider."

\- "Even if I want to do something I'm pretty useless right now."- said Deeks signaling his bandaged leg.

\- "It's something you can do without moving from that couch, Deeks."

\- "Now I'm lost"- he sighed.

\- "You can be there for the others, you can try to give them the balance they lack. You can support Kensi and Sam and Nell and Eric. Callen told me that you don't realize that you're as important as anyone in this team."

\- "I can't substitute Callen."

\- "You don't need to substitute him, you just need to be you."

\- "I… I'm not as good as the others. C'mon Nate, I barely speak two words in Spanish, I'm not a Navy S.E.A.L., I'm not a tech and Kensi is able to kill me thousand times with her knife before I try to find mine in the pocket. I'm not even an agent!"

\- "Maybe that's the problem, Deeks. You're not an agent because you're considering yourself less than the rest, but let me tell you something, you have conquered not only their respect, but their trust and love and the list the things you're able to do is as big as the list than the others couldn't do, so I let you think about that before your mum comes!"

\- "Hey Nate! Wait! You're not letting me alone with my mum! I need psychological support! C'mon man! Nateee!"

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After some minutes in ops with Eric and Nell who were elucubrating crazy theories bordering on extraterrestrial abductions, Kensi went downstairs just to discover that Sam had gone to Mexico. She felt bad for not doing anything to look for his friend, but her mission as Hetty put it, was to help Deeks to recover so she sat for a while on her desk discovering that, for once, the mess on her desk was nothing compared to the one in Callen's table. The fact of noticing that made her very sad, little by little, day after day G was filling his desk with all that stuff and nobody even care about what he was doing. One thing was clear, when he'd come back he'd need a clean space to work, so for once in her life she started the task of classifying and organizing Callen's desk.

When Anna arrived she had nearly finished. It was good to see that she really cared about Callen, definitively he needed someone like her in his life, someone bold and strong and, at the same time, a good person. Nevertheless after all the fiasco with Joelle, she decided to watch her as a falcon, no way another woman will hurt again his best friend, first she will have to deal with her. Boys… they need protection.

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A slap on his face woke G up. Startled and hurting all over he didn't recognize the humble room where he was lying on the floor and he had no idea of who that man could be. Instinctively he adopted a defense position.

\- "You, white man, c'mon we have to go."

\- "Where...?" – G tried to talk, his throat dry.

G's head was about to explode. He felt feverish and his skin was clammy and hot. He sat up with difficulties trying to control the dizziness; just breathing deeply was an impossible task and his right arm seemed swollen and stiff.

\- "We are in Malakal, you've been out for nearly two days. You were lucky we found you. We, the people from the South, protect the blue helmets and you're in the pack. The U.N. man promised me more money to take you out of the country and the only flight I could get you in, take off in the next hours, we have to go."

\- "Please...water..."

The man handled Callen a dirty glass of water that he drank avidly. Still groggy he considered his choices and he decided to go along with the plan. Even if he didn't know his destination the alternative of remaining there wasn't better and once in the airport he could decide. He checked his pockets, the passports were there as well as the cigarette paper and the picture he took from Shana's body, but the money had gone. He understood that the U.N. soldier bribed that man to take care of him with his own money. Money didn't matter. It took some minutes but finally he mustered up strength and got up and went out. The sun in his face made him close his eyes, a car was ready. The bumpy road was a constant reminder of his sore muscles and the need of taking care of his injuries. In less than thirty minutes he was at the airport. The man gave him a paper, a safe-conduct instead of a plane ticket, he smiled. He'd been always kind of the countries where things like that still worked.

\- "Thank you."

\- "I made more money with you sleeping in my floor for two days than one year working; you don't have to thank me. Now go."

Malakal airport was just a barely asphalted track perpendicular to the river; a precarious control tower with doubtful air traffic controllers. His plane was going to Cairo. Perfect. Even if the Arab spring didn't bring the promised political opening, Egypt was one of the best options to stop for a while and to find a doctor. The sooner, the better.


	85. Chapter 85

A.N.: Dear readers, I hope you'll enjoy this one. G at his best ;) Thanks for being there!

Chapter 85

That time G used his Russian passport, the security was just a formality and in no time he found himself in the small plane. He was feeling weak and in pain, pain that increased considerably when the pressure changed with the take off. Once it stabilized and his ear equalized the pressure, he managed to lock himself in the toilet. Five days without shaving, dried blood on his face and neck, dirt, dark bags under his eyes and an unnatural pallor, the image on the mirror told him that he was overestimating his strength. He tidied up the best he could and regained his seat. The less than three hours flight wasn't enough to have a proper rest.

The international airport of Cairo was crowded, but G's diplomatic passport worked perfectly and soon he found himself lost on a sea of people. With no money he had no alternative other than to "go shopping" for the things he needed. The classic aviator mirror sunglasses, the I-phone and around four hundred sterling pounds were the present of a pilot too interested in a brunette flight attendant to notice that he had let his jacket unattended. Looking around G found his next victim, a wealthy Saudi guy who spoke loudly on his phone. Two men were following him pushing two overloaded airport trolleys. Aware that he wasn't in any condition of taking a direct approach, G decided to ring the bell and run like hell. No far from there three kids were racing with their trolleys, Callen just walked between them when they had already launched the trolleys in such a way that they had to turn off bumping directly into the trolleys of the Saudi. Seconds later the corridor was a chaos of trolleys, adults screaming, kids crying and suitcases all over the floor. G only had to pick up one of them and walk away discretely to the toilet where he keep tally of his loot: a white thawb and a red and white ghutra that were perfect to cover his dirty clothes and the cut on his forehead, some perfume that hid the fact that he hadn't taken a shower in days.

The code to unlock the phone was a simple "Z", so obvious that the pilot guy was going to pay G a luxury limousine ride thanks to the application he had on his phone.

G used the time in the car to do a little internet research and just before arriving to the Fairmont Nile City Hotel he dealt with the chauffeur that he could keep the suitcase and the I-phone in exchange of a little service. He let the man working some magic for him at the reception of the hotel and some minutes later he entered the hall with the air of being the king of the world. He called the chauffeur gave him the cellphone and dismissed him with a gesture of his hand.

\- "The director, please"- G said in his best Oxford accent.

\- "We're terribly sorry, sir, your reservation…"

\- "I'm not going to lose my time talking to you. I said the director, please."

\- "Sir, the director is not here at the moment but I assure you that I'm here to serve you."

\- "My roommate at Oxford University the prince Faisal bin Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud told me to precede him in his trip to Cairo and this is the reception I'm getting? Scandalous."

\- "Sir, probably an informatics error that we can fix immediately. If you give me your passport…"

\- "What a day! First, my plane had a technical problem and I had to take a commercial flight. Then they didn't have French champagne and to top it all they lost my luggage. And now you!"- G made the man feel guilty of all the disgraces of the world before continue – "As you could understand I'm travelling with a diplomat passport that I'm not authorized to give you"- Said G showing him briefly one of his passports hopping that the man's fear make him to erase of his mind the details.

\- "A credit card…" – the receptionists started to ask just to stop abruptly when G's blue stare fixed his eyes.

\- "What kind of hotel is this? I'm afraid that I'm going to call the prince. coins, a transfer to the hotel account and a generous gratuity for the employees if the service is good. Definitely this is not a good start!"

\- "Something that we can remedy at once, sir!"- said the receptionist seeing himself buying a new car and a gold bracelet for his wife – "The room…"

\- "The suite" - corrected Callen.

\- "The suite would be at …"

\- "At the prince's name, of course. Listen, my assistant will give you the details tomorrow when he arrives, now I'm pretty tired and hungry so…"

\- "Of course, silly of me, please sir, excuse my poor judgement. Bellboy, please, leads our guest to the presidential suite."

\- "This way, sir."

G gave the boy a twenty English pounds tip knowing that he would pass the message of his generosity. Once alone he threw himself to the mini bar and drank a bottle of half a liter of water avidly. The relief was nearly instantaneous but he restrained himself from drinking another one following the first one. His body needed time to adjust. Then hanging at the door the "Don't disturb" signal he took all his clothes off and went to the bathroom. The Jacuzzi was tempting, but he knew that a hot bath will lower his pressure and he couldn't allow that. A shower, a cold one to prevent the fever he knew he had from rising. Careful of not letting the dirt to touch the burn on his shoulder or the stitches on his arm, he managed to clean himself. It was more painful than he anticipated and he needed to rest for a while. Shaking he put a towel around his waist noticing how much weight he had lost lately and he entered the room where he found a well assorted trolley. Eggs, fruit, breads, juice, coffee, tea, meat, fish… he ate for the first time in days, slowly, biting each mouthful and thinking on the people on the camp in South Sudan.

Exhausted he ordered some clothes to the boutique of the hotel and put the alarm on. He needed to sleep but not before checking in the tablet the information he wanted to confirm. After half of his life from a cheap motel to a gross pension, he had to recognize that the luxury hotel with all he can wish at the reach of his hand was more than helpful. G laid on his stomach on the comfortable bed and even before putting the head on the pillow he was asleep.

Three hours later before the alarm clock had the opportunity to accomplish his function Callen woke up screaming, in pain, completely wet with sweat and with a fever he knew it was high.

He sat up with difficulties wondering why he was hurting all over. The redness and the hot in the wound in his arm indicated that it was infected, but he knew that it wasn't so bad. The shoulder on the other hand wasn't hurting as bad as before. The two days he had been out a layer of tissue had grown and even if he knew that he must take it off to let the wound to heal from the inside to the outside he wasn't strong enough to bear that kind of acute pain right now. His health was deteriorating, maybe it was all the time he spent without eating and drinking or to have discontinued the antibiotics or just that he had barely rested in a long time. Maybe he was just getting old.

He drank another bottle of water, headed to the shower again and didn't stop the cold water until he was freezing.

The clothes and the bag pack he had asked for were waiting for him at the entrance of the suite; it was incredible how a promise of money could make people to be willing to serve; no time to feel guilty. He dialed the 0 and requested to the reception desk the presence of the doctor of the hotel and got dressed with white linen pants and a large also white shirt and covered his head with the ghutra.

A knock on the door made him smile as he remembered a classic poem in the Spanish literature "Poderoso caballero es Don dinero" (Powerful gentleman is Mr. Money).

\- "As-salāmu ʿalaykum"- Saluted the doctor.

\- "Wa-ʿalaykumu s-salām. Come in, please."- invited Callen.

\- "At the reception tell me that you may be indisposed."

\- "I cut my arm some days ago playing polo and I think that the wound could be infected."

\- "Let's have a look, I'm sure there's nothing serious."

G sat down on the design chair, placed his arm on the table and rolled up his sleeve. The doctor put a pair of gloves on and examined the cut carefully; just his light touch hurt like hell and G must do a real effort to avoid a moan. He could read worriedness on the doctor's eyes not because of his wound, but because of the responsibility, probably he was just accustomed to give some pills for stomachache, and G knew that he couldn't count on him to help him.

\- "You said you did it playing polo?"

\- "Yes, the horse fell down on my arm and I guess I stabbed myself with the stirrup."

\- "It's a deep cut and some of the stiches are infected, I can take them out and clean the wound with an antibiotic cream, but I advise you to go to the hospital for further examinations, without the proper treatment this can be really serious."

\- "Really? It's not the first time I fell down of the horse"- G pretended ignorance, he averted his gaze from the wound as the doctor cut the thread of the infected stitches.

The pain was really bad and when the doctor applied the antibiotic Callen couldn't repress a groan. He was sweating, even paler than before, and his breathing came out with difficulties.

\- "I'm sorry. I know that the antibiotic stings, it would pass in some minutes. Let me help you to lay down."- said the doctor putting his arm around G's waist and walking him to the bed. Callen had planned to pretend to be in pain, but in fact he didn't have to.

\- "It hurts more than I thought."-he said sincerely.

\- "Sorry, nearly done." - said the doctor bandaging the wound - "I really recommend you to go to the hospital, I'm going to write you a letter for a friend of mine and he would receive you whenever you want."

\- "Thank you. Tomorrow when the prince arrived I'll go. I think I need to rest today."

\- "Let me give you some painkillers, there're not too strong, but they can help you to sleep more comfortably this night. Try not to move the arm, I'll find a sling for you."

\- "Thank you very much indeed, doctor. I'm going to take it now and I think I'm going to sleep until tomorrow. Your attentiveness will be rewarded."

After more exchanges of exaggerated thankfulness the doctor finally leaved and G closed his eyes waiting for the pain to subside. Why it hurt so bad?


	86. Chapter 86

A.N.: Before posting, just to say thank you to all the wonderful readers that are there, to the ones who review and to the timid ones :)

Chapter 86

Hetty was about to give the first sip to her still hot tea when she saw Eric, Nell, Anna and Kensi pushing each other as they ran downstairs. She took a deep breath preparing herself for the news.

\- "We found him!"- announced four voices talking at the same time trying to tell everything.

Hetty put her cup on the table and raised a hand making automatically everyone to shut up.

\- "Ladies, gentleman, order. Please, Miss Jones, could you explain the details?

\- "Yes Hetty, Anna discovered that Russian name…"

\- "Dmitri Jvorostinin"- Anna intervened.

\- "…in the list of the diplomats who entered in Egypt."

\- "Egypt?"

\- "Cairo. We don't know exactly in which flight he arrived, but we reduced our list to five probabilities."- added Eric.

\- "Which are?"- asked Hetty again.

Kensi read a list:

\- "Flight 2113 arrived yesterday at 9h25 from Khartoum, flight 2909 at 10am from Malakal, flight 4152 also yesterday at 17h30 from Juba, flight 3489 the day before yesterday from Addis Ababa at 23h45 and the flight 3555 as well from Khartoum to Cairo at 19h15 of yesterday."

\- "May I ask how did you arrive at that conclusion?"

\- "We just checked the list of the diplomats travelling in the last two days in West Africa"- replied innocently Eric.

\- "I see. I only hope that you did cover your tracks, Mr. Beale, because I don't want this unit to be in the eye of the storm again and to have that information is simply illegal."

\- "Hetty in this case the ends justify the means!"- said Nell.

\- "So, Cairo it's your bet."

\- "I'm going to look for him, I'm sure that he'll listen to me."- said Anna.

\- "Miss Kolcheck, in order to make Mr. Callen listen you have to locate him first and Cairo is the perfect city to get lost when you need to. Besides in the best case scenario and giving that our premises are correct he has twenty seven hours of advantage without adding the eighteen hours to get there."

\- "Well, he had not used a passport today so we can assume that he is still there"- assured Kensi just to add- "I'm going with Anna, he won't be able to trick us."

Hetty smiled. It was more than a long shot, but it was all they have.

\- "Hetty, please, my fath… Arkady knows people, I'm sure that I can locate Callen even if he changes his identity."

\- "All right Miss Kolcheck, go to find that cheeky rascal and bring him home. Let me arrange the details for a private flight, you'll gain some hours, but you Miss Blye, you need to stay here. Mr. Deeks still needs you."

\- "Hetty…"- started to protest Kensi, but in the bottom of her heart she knew that her boss was right.

\- "You know that I'm right, Kensi. And you two keep tracks on his passports, and be invisible."- Before everybody disappeared she added: -"You did a good job, I'm proud of you, and now go, go, go!"

Less than one hour later Anna was on her way to Cairo.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Still shaking G took two painkillers, force himself to eat and drink some more, shaved his beard, changed his clothes to black jeans, pink shirt, suede light brown jacket and a baseball cap, put his scarce possessions in the bag pack with two bottles of water and some pieces of fruit. He also took the courtesy tablet, it could be useful later. Looking around he checked that he didn't left any personal belongings behind. Then he took an envelope from the desk and put the cigarette paper and the picture he found on Mohamed Shana. Once more he shuddered at the sight. It was the proof that all the pain and time and effort weren't all in vain. He put the envelope in the interior pocket of his new jacket with the fake passports.

He opened the door of the terrace and carefully he descended to the garden. Even if someone saw him it was impossible to be recognized. In no time he was on the bank of the Nile, beautiful place; in other circumstances he'd enjoyed the walk, now he had just the time to exchange the British pounds for the local ones, to buy a prepaid card in order to have internet access on the tablet, some shia, the tea that Hetty loved and that he knew he could help him back at home and then, exhausted he managed to deal with a taxi driver a ride to Alexandria.

From the back seat he saw the sunset behind the Cheops pyramid, his last thoughts before falling asleep were for Anna, he really would had loved to share that sunset with her.

It took G nearly three hours to go over the less than 112 miles between Cairo and Alexandria. When finally G arrived there he paid the ride and walked to the port in an attempt to clear his head and to breathe the nice marine breeze. He had the impression that the air didn't reach his lungs and the walk ended up with the opposite of the desired effect. He drank some water, renewed his dose of painkillers and then he saw it: the imposing silhouette of the aircraft carrier Harry S. Truman which was outlined by the lights of the military port.

G arrived to the control post and identified himself with his personal keys and security codes. I took some time but finally he was escorted to the interior of the boat where his bag pack was confiscated and he was thoroughly searched. He had to bit his lip to avoid crying when the marine hands touched him. He felt so weak and it hurt so bad!

Tired Callen gave the marine the tablet displaying the e-mail he previously had found and expressed his special request. Again he was escorted, this time to a nearly empty cabin. He knew he was being watched, but at this point he didn't care. The fever made him doze and he lost track of time.

Hours later the captain in person arrived startling Callen.

\- "You're not looking good, son."- the man said looking attentively at him.

\- "I must recognized that I've been better, sir."

\- "Sorry for the waiting, as you can understand yours is a very unusual request and it took a while to get the confirmation."

\- "I understand, sir, and I appreciate the effort."

\- "The Secretary of Defense answered directly the phone when we gave the code to his department, he seemed surprised but he granted the request. He advised me not to play poker with you."

G smiled tiredly.

\- "Your flight will be ready in two hours, try to rest until then."

\- "I will. Thank you, sir."

True to his word later the captain himself walked him to the plane. As an amateur pilot G would have enjoyed the flight in the fighter aircraft, this time he passed out during the take off and he was unconscious nearly all the way back home.


	87. Chapter 87

A.N.: Warning! cliffhanger ahead, but yes, G is back home. Thanks for reading and a bigger thanks for the reviews :)

Chapter 87

The word deception wasn't enough to describe how Sam felt. His trip to Sinaloa was fruitless, even if the cooperation with the Mexican police had set a new path for the future relationship with the N.C.I.S. Last night he learned from Hetty that Anna was in Cairo looking for G. Cairo! It didn't make any sense. The only thing he knew for sure was that if G didn't want to be found, they could comb every country of the world as he laughed from the Moon. That night he didn't sleep well, nightmares about the last minutes with Michelle through the screen in the armory haunted him.

One week without G, two months without his kids at home and three months without Michelle. Sam wondered how he had lost the persons he loved the most in such a short period of time.

Michelle, his love, his anchor, his compass, he was struggling to deal with her absence and the last three months were just surrealistic. Aiden was keeping his distance since the gun incident and his little girl seemed more concerned about G than willing to talk to him.

G. Sam knew that he was feeling so sorry about himself that he lost the perspective; G had tried everything in his power, from the shadow, without telling anything, as always; he knew he was hurt, never to the point he discovered later and he felt guilty for not having stopped this nonsense. They were paying the consequences of his pity, if that day at the Military academy he would have finished Khaled, maybe his son would see him as a killer, but he would have his mother.

Unable to stay in bed he got up at five a.m., ran his usual ten miles and even without having breakfast he got to the Challenger. He needed to do something before going to the office.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

G concentrated all his energy to remain conscious during the landing. He was nearly deaf, hurting all over and his balance was compromised. The marines of the base laughed at his expenses, thinking that he was one of these guys getting sick in a plane, he laughed with them, he was just happy to be home. After some bureaucracy he finally could go out of the port and take a taxi. He deduced by the stares of the driver that his looks weren't the best. The shaking hands, the parlor, the cold sweat, probably the man took him for a junkie. He tried to compose himself and to ignore the pain. It was too early to call Hetty and in fact he needed to do something before going to the office. Half an hour later he paid the taxi ride with the tablet he "borrowed" from the hotel, stole some flowers and kneeled in front of Michelle's tomb. Today was the anniversary of her death. Three months. Three terrible months of anguish, failure, loss and pain, because he had lost the only thing that he thought he couldn't lose: the love and respect of his family.

The cemetery was deserted, the sun still low in the horizon wasn't enough to give the warm G needed and he was freezing. There, touching the cold stone G realized for the first time that his friend was gone forever. Two big tears fell from his eyes, he did nothing to wipe them away. Unable to keep his hurt knee on the ground he sat on his heels. He was so overwhelmed by the feelings that he found difficult to breathe.

\- "Hey Michelle, it's finally me. Sorry for not coming before. You know I couldn't. I failed everyone, but I kept my promise Michelle, I swear. The guy, I found him. The kids are safe, Sam is safe. I… I'll try to look after them also from now on, even if I need to do it from the distance, but I swear you, I'll protect them with my life the same way I would had changed my life for yours. I'm sorry for not being able to find you… I… miss you my friend…"

G held with his left arm his wounded one and remained there crying, mourning for the first time the loss of Michelle. It was so hard to breathe!

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The morning was still cold, but the blue sky was the prelude of a perfect and sunny day that contrasted with Sam's mood. As he drove slowly through the empty cemetery admiring the beauty and the peace of the place, he wondered once more how G managed to organize everything to the perfection being alone and wounded. He felt a lump on his throat. Maybe Michelle had the answers

he was looking for, as she always used to. He took the last curve and suddenly stopped the car. There was someone at Michelle's grave. Sam heart started to bump. A thin man with expensive clothes and a cap covering his face was sat just there, no possible mistake, it was Michelle's stone. A bag pack laid at his side. A bomb? Sam took his gun and went out of the car, approaching little by little out of the angle of vision of the unexpected visitor. The man was looking at the ground hugging himself, he seemed to be crying, but then, suddenly he turned startled as if someone told him that he was being watched.

\- "G!" – Sam cried running to his friend at the same time he holstered the gun.

Sam saw G trying to stand up quickly, just to fall on one knee. With difficulties he managed to rise up before he had the time to arrive to his side.

\- "G!"- he repeated softly this time.

\- "Sam… I'm sorry, I didn't want to bother you… I'm going…"

\- "G, finally!"- Sam put a hand on his friend shoulder, but G backed up and raised his left hand in a position of defense.

\- "Sorry Sam… I just needed to be sure… I found him and he was dead…"

\- "Are you ok, man?"

\- "Don't know, but you're. Shana… nearly an ambush…"

\- "What are you talking about, G? Please come with me!"- Sam was appalled by G's appearance, he could tell he had fever and for the nonsense he was saying he was clearly delirious.

\- "He was dead Sam, but I killed him anyway…"

\- "C'mon G, let's go to the car you can tell me everything about the dead man."

\- "No… Sam, it's over… I don't want to… bother…"

G was struggling to get enough air in his lungs and a sudden cough made him to bend his waist, he was about to fall when Sam grabbed him, surprised by how little he weight.

\- "Arrrrg"- complained G at the contact, but he wasn't strong enough to get rid of Sam's embrace.

\- "What's wrong G? where it hurts? Please, talk to me!"

\- "It just… hurts…"

\- "C'mon buddy, this way"- in spite of G's weak complaints Sam managed to get his friend in the car.

G sat there in is usual place holding his arm, without resting his back on the seat and trying to keep his eyes focused. His breathing was rapid and superficial.

\- "The belt"- said Sam before turning the engine on. But G seemed oblivious. Sam bent over his friend to grab the security belt and G covered himself again as trying to protect himself from an attack.

\- "It's ok, G, it's only the belt. I'm not going to hurt you, you know that."

G tried to nod just to stop his gesture as if in pain.

\- "Please, G, tell me what's wrong, buddy!"

\- "Nothing is wrong now, Sam, it's ok, the kids are ok..."

\- "G you're worrying me, what happen with the kids? talk to me please!" – Sam took the phone out of his pocket and pressed the agent in distress alarm as he drove. It was the quickest way to alert the team.

\- "Banana… Aiden… ok… Anthony… is dead…"- G leaned his head against the window and closed his eyes. He was so tired… he will rest just for a minute and then he'd ask Sam to bring him home.

Sam's phone biped and he pressed the green button.

\- "Mr. Hanna! What's wrong?"

\- "Hetty! I'm with G!"

\- "OMG Sam, is he ok!?"

\- "I don't know what's wrong with him. He is running a high temperature and he is delirious."

\- "Put the hands-free, please!"

\- "Done."

\- "Mr. Callen, do you hear me Mr. Callen?!"

G could hear Hetty, where was she? He needed to apologize…

\- "Het…"- he tried to talk but he was so tired…

\- "Mr. Callen, listen to me. Everything is going to be ok, you don't have to worry anymore. Just hang in there, do you hear me Mr. Callen?"

\- "Hetty he is having problems breathing, I need to get him to a hospital as soon as possible."

\- "Eric is tracking your vehicle now and Nell is sending a police patrol to escort you."

\- "Yes, I can hear the sirens. Please Hetty, my kids."

\- "What's happening with them, Sam?"

\- "Something G said, I just want to make sure they are ok. There's another kid, Anthony, apparently he is dead. He was talking nonsense, but I need to know."

\- "Nell is talking to the school now- Thank you Miss Jones. – They are ok Sam, you don't have to worry about them."

\- "Thank goodness!"

The police motorbikes surrounded the Challenger and opened the way in the crowded highway. The hospital was in the second exit, in less than ten minutes they will be there. Sam looked at G who seemed to be sleeping. Extending his arm he touched his forehead. He was burning in spite of the cold sweat. The moment Sam retired his hand G's head dropped forward. He was unconscious.

\- "G! G!"- called Sam touching again his friend.

\- "What's wrong Sam?"- asked Hetty at the other side of the line holding her breathe.

\- "G! c'mon buddy, don't do this to me! Hetty, I think he is not breathing!"


	88. Chapter 88

A.N.: Sorry for the cliffhanger! And my apologies in advance if there're errors in the medical scenes. As always, thank you!

Chapter 88

Eric and Nell looked each other. In the big screen in ops they could see the Challenger advancing with difficulties in spite of the two police officers trying to clear the traffic ahead. Rush hour in L.A. could be the first step to hell.

\- "Sam go to the shoulder; we're sending another alert, a police car will be there in seconds"- said Nell.

The police finally opened a way and Sam could get to the road shoulder. He was rolling nearly at full speed, one hand on the wheel another one checking on Callen.

\- "G! C'mon G!"

\- "Mr. Hanna?" - Hetty was afraid to ask in loud voice what she really wanted to know as if saying the words could attract a disgrace.

\- "Hetty his pulse is so weak, I can barely feel it! He needs CPR!"- Sam was desperate debating between stopping the car or continuing driving.

\- "Sam, listen to me"- said Hetty reading his thoughts- "There's a medical team waiting for you at the ER entrance. You'll be there before an ambulance could get to you."

\- "How long, Eric? C'mon buddy!"

\- "At your current speed two minutes!"- calculated Eric typing frenetically on his tablet.

\- "Sam, I'm on my way to the hospital, I let the line open in my phone; see you there."-said Hetty going out of ops. She was glad to went out, she wasn't sure of being able to control her emotions, nevertheless Nell and Eric couldn't help but feeling like lost orphans.

\- "Nell..."- started to say Eric in a tiny voice.

\- "Not now, Eric, not yet"-Nell's voice trembled- "First we do the job."

Sam heard the siren of the police car before seeing it and in seconds the vehicle appeared from nowhere driving at his side making more room to advance. The exit was just in front of them.

\- "Please G... I can't find a pulse!" - he was panicking. Not again, not again, not again!

\- "Sam, the traffic lights are open, you can be there in fifty seconds. Just drive Sam!"

Forty five seconds later Sam made an entrance in ER worthy of a Formula 1 car. Trembling he went out of the Challenger without caring about the car which was parked by a police officer. Two nurse assistants carried G like a rag doll to a gurney and placed a manual respirator over his nose and mouth as they rolled at full speed to a box nearby where a team of doctors and nurses were ready. He was getting purple due to the lack of oxygen. They opened G's shirt and immediately started CPR.

\- "Glasgow ten."

\- "He is not responding,"

\- "One ampoule of epinephrine now."

\- "I got a pulse."

\- "Right lung collapsed, probably haemothorax, needle of five for thoracentesis."

\- "Arterial tension seven-three,"

\- "Increase the epinephrine. Good."

\- "I need a central line with one liter of saline open wide."

\- "This guy is completely dehydrated. I can't find the vein!"

\- "Try the subclavian, quick!"

The resident was literally putting all his weight on G shoulder in order to make the needle pass.

\- "Got it. Saline running."

\- "I've got 250ml of liquid drained."

\- "Too slow, we need to recover the lung now. I'm going to open. Knife! chest tube!"

The moment G's lung expanded he made a big inspiration.

\- "That's it c'mon guy!"

\- "Let's turn him, I need to see if he is bleeding."

\- "One, two, three"

\- "Oh my God, what's that?" asked a nurse taking off the bandage on G's shoulder.

\- "A burn... it has been treated but it's infected now"

\- "Like the cut in his arm, the wound has been cleaned recently though."

\- "Ampicillin intravenous 200/1."

\- "Sats staying down. They're at 81%."

Sam was in a corner completely taken aback for what had happened the last minutes. To find G unexpectedly and in that state was just too much to assimilate. What happened to him? why is he suddenly fighting for his life?

\- "Sir, sir!"

Sam was so lost in his thoughts that he hadn't realized that they were talking to him.

\- "Please sir, you can't stay here!"

\- "But..."

\- "Let's us do our job; someone will inform you as soon as possible."

Sam had one more look at G who was ghostly pale behind the oxygen mask then, reluctantly, went out of the box and found himself in the cold corridor of ER. Feeling weak he sat in a blue plastic chair where Hetty found him some minutes later.

\- "Sam"- she said gently, her eyes full of anxiety.

\- "He is bad Hetty, they had to put a tube on his chest, he wasn't breathing..."

\- "He is strong, Sam, you have to have faith."

\- "How could this happen, Hetty?" - Sam hid the face on his hands. –"Where was he?"

\- "We can only speculate, we'll have to wait for him to tell us."

The next hour seemed like three for them. When finally one of the doctors went out of the box, his gesture was serious.

\- "Good morning. Family of Grisha Callen?"

\- "Yes. Good morning doctor, how is he?"- asked Hetty.

\- "Well, we he is in a stable condition right now, but in a very precarious balance. He arrived here in cardiac arrest due to a haemothorax, we did a thoracotomy and drained the lung. The good news is that we were able to control the bleeding and even if is his saturation is not optimal he is breathing on his own. The bad news is that he had septic symptoms, very high fever and dehydration and if he doesn't respond to the antibiotics in the next few hours we need to make some decisions."

\- "What kind of decisions?"- asked Sam more than anxious.

\- "This is something we have to discuss with his next of kin."

\- "I'm his next of kin, and I assure you that there is nothing you can't say in his presence."- said Hetty signaling Sam.

The doctor seemed to consider for a moment and then explained:

\- "As I told you before he is breathing for himself, but his levels of oxygen are low. In order to get more oxygen his heart is beating faster and this can be exhausting. He is already pretty weak and being sincere I don't think he can resist much more in this situation."

Hetty looked at the floor knowing exactly what the doctor was implying.

\- "What are the options, doctor?"- asked Sam.

\- "If he doesn't improve in the next hours we'll need to intubate."

\- "Ok, so what's the big deal? You intubate him, let the meds work while he is resting and then you take him off the ventilator."- said Sam.

\- "It's not that simple, sir. If we put him right now in a ventilator they are big probabilities that we couldn't take him off life support."

\- "But…"- insisted Sam just to be cut by Hetty.

\- "Sam, you know as well as I how Mr. Callen feels. After that day in Venice we signed the Living Will Registry. He didn't want to live like that."

\- "What are you saying Hetty? That we are letting him die?"- a tear ran on Sam's cheek.

\- "I'm afraid he made that decision for us, Sam. So, no doctor, you're not putting him in life support."

Sam gave a kick to the next chair and ran outside, unable to listen to more nonsense.

\- "Sorry about that."- apologized Hetty.

\- "It's not an easy situation, I understand. Do you have any questions?"

Hetty seemed afraid to ask.

\- "Is he in pain?"

\- "He is responding to painful stimulus, with his current level of conscience we don't know how much pain he is suffering exactly but he is receiving the standard dose of painkillers. At this moment our main difficulty is to find balance between the sedation and his capacity to breathe. The more we sedate him the less he could respond by himself and right now, believe me, he needs to put everything he got, he needs to fight."

\- "Can we see him?"

\- "Not now, they are testing a bacterial culture to determine the right antibiotic to give him. He seemed to have been in treatment before and we need to establish the causes of his present state, because is more than confusing."

\- "I can help you with that and I can even give you the number of the doctor who treated him firstly."

\- "Follow me, please."

The doctors allowed Hetty to walk at G's side while they moved him to the I.C.U., she was appalled to see how much he had deteriorated since last time she saw him she tried to hold his hand to let him know that he wasn't alone, but once the elevator arrived to the second floor the medical team hurried him to his new room and let Hetty in the waiting area next door with a plastic bag with G's clothes.

\- "Where have you been Mr. Callen?"- she asked to herself.


	89. Chapter 89

A.N.: And now that he's back it's time to get some answers! Thank you as always for reading!

Chapter 89

Moments later Sam appeared at the door of the waiting area next to the I.C.U. he was carrying the bag pack G had in the cemetery that he had recovered from the car.

\- "How is he?"- he asked softly.

\- "I told the doctors all I know and they are adjusting the antibiotics and Dr. Reyes Costa is on her way to treat his ear. Apparently all the problem comes from there, the rest of the wounds, even if they're infected now, aren't responsible for his present state."

\- "Can we see him?"

\- "Not yet, Sam, not yet."

Both remained in silence lost in their thoughts until a nurse tell them that one person was allowed to visit for five minutes.

\- "Go Hetty, he needs you more than me now"

\- "Sam…"

\- "Please, I'll see him next time."

Hetty put the mask and the protectors and walked to the I.C.U. The room was lightly illuminated and G's bed was in the middle surrounded by all the equipment he could need. The head of the bed was raised in a way that G seemed to be sat up straight to prevent his lungs to get filled with fluid. He was hooked to a central line under his right collarbone and a peripheral one in his hand. The chest tube from his side continued to drain the liquid of his lung, the noise was more than disturbing. The electrodes, the oxygen mask and the oximeter completed the panorama. Hetty checked his constants in the monitor. His pulse was rapid, his tension low and his temperature, in spite of the antibiotics, was 105.8. She didn't care about the pessimistic reading; her focus was in the figure behind.

\- "Mr. Callen, I know you can hear me, dear. I don't know how all this could happen and at this point I don't care. The only thing I care is you, do you hear me? I need you to fight, and I know that you're tired and that you think that you can't take any more, you can take whatever it takes to get you out of this room, understood? No excuses, boy, you need to fight now."

She was holding his hand and caressing his forehead where she discovered the new cut.

\- "You must know that your team is more than worried about you, and, right now, there's a pretty blonde looking for you in the other side of the world. You have to get well to deal with her."

G seemed completely out, the only sign he was still alive was the condensation of his breath on the oxygen mask.

\- "Use that damned stubbornness of yours to get out of here, I'm here to help you, but you have to come to life, do you hear me?"

A nurse approached to G, noted the vitals in the chart, changed the bag of the saline solution adjusted the IVs and injected him in the stomach.

\- "Heparin, to stop blood clotting"- he explained to Hetty –"I'm calling the doctor, you have to wait outside, please."

\- "Is something wrong?"

\- "Let's say there's nothing better."

When Hetty returned to the waiting room five new faces had joined Sam.

\- "Mr. Deeks, what the hell are you doing here?"- she asked taking the mask off.

\- "The same as you Hetty, how is he?"- he was sat in one of the chairs his leg in a plastic splint, holding the crutches with one hand.

\- "Critical. The doctor said that he needs to overcome the infection in the next hours."

\- "Can we see him, Hetty? - asked Kensi.

\- "Not now, they are going to check on him again, I'll try to get permission to stay in the room, but for now we have to wait. Miss Jones, Mr. Beale you let the fort unattended!"

\- "Hetty…"- started Nell.

\- "G needs us and there's nothing we can do in ops for him now."-completed Eric.

\- "Hetty, Sam told us about the cemetery… that means that he was here in L.A. all the time?"

\- "I don't have that answer, Miss Blye…"

\- "But maybe G has."- said Sam holding Callen's bag pack.

He opened it and with Kensi's help he took off all the contents.

\- "These are his clothes"- said Sam checking his bloody T-shirt and his dirty blue jeans.

\- "Anything else?"- asked Deeks.

\- "A bag with herbs, an apple, a bottle of water and what's that, Sam? it's written in Arabic."

\- "Painkillers."

\- "Let me see"- asked Nate taking the box- "Not very strong ones, these are just useful if you have a slight headache."

\- "Do you know Arabic now, Nate?"- asked Nell surprised.

\- "Don't ask."- said the psychologist glancing at Hetty.

\- "So all we have to do is to find where these painkillers can be sold and we'll know where he had been."

\- "Egypt."- said Hetty attiring everyone's attention.

She had opened the plastic bag with the clothes G was wearing that same morning.

\- "This was a one hundred percent polished Egyptian cotton shirt from a luxury shop in Cairo."- Hetty showed the raged pink shirt cut by the ER staff.

\- "Armani jeans, suede jacket…"- continued Sam.

\- "It seems that he was undercover."- commented Deeks.

\- "And he was, but we don't know his mission."- said Kensi.

\- "G told something about a Shana, someone he killed, but was dead, he wasn't making any sense." – Sam explained.

\- "Did he say Shana? Mohamed Shana?"- asked Nell - "I know that name. Mario Alberto Suárez named him in an interrogation. I believe Callen found the connection."

\- "What connection?"- said Nate.

\- "The one between the Molina cartel and Khaled."

\- "What?! – Now Sam was more than intrigued– "You told me that it was a trick to get rid of Washington."

\- "Do you mean that Callen started all this to protect Sam and his family?"-asked Deeks feeling more than bad for accusing G of not being there for Sam.

Hetty walked to the window holding G's jacket against her chest, caught up in her own thoughts.

\- "To protect all of us."- said Nell.

\- "I need to know that my kids are safe."- said Sam suddenly worried.

\- "Nell called the school and told the director to be vigilant; they were fine, Sam, don't worry."- reassured Eric.

\- "Do you really think that Callen would have come back if the threat wasn't over, Sam?"- Kensi was angry now.

\- "Please, all these are speculations, we're already nervous and there is not point to start arguing."- tried Nate.

\- "He succeeded."- said suddenly Hetty turning around.-"The connection between the cartel and Khaled was real; once the cartel was finished, Mr. Callen found the link in the person of Mohamed Shana, followed his tracks from Sudan to South Sudan eliminated the threat flew to Cairo and came back home."

\- "How do you know that?"- asked Nate.

\- "I found this on his pocket."- said Hetty showing the passports and the envelope. –"Anna Kolcheck was right. Callen used her father's contacts to get the diplomat passports, you can see the stamps."

\- "It can't be possible, the stamp says that he was in Cairo yesterday, how can he be here now in such a short time?"

\- "You gain time flying from East to West and my guess is a military flight, Mr. Deeks."- Hetty paused and handling the envelope to Sam she added:

\- "Mr. Hanna, I think this is for you."

Sam looked at her serious face and took off the envelope a picture. A very familiar picture that was taken some years ago, in which he was with Michelle and Aiden holding a little Kamran all smile. Michelle's face had been burnt with a cigarette. Sam's hands started to shake.

\- "Oh my… G…"

Unable to stay there Sam went to the corridor as the others looked at the picture. Everyone felt a chill and a heavy silence installed between them.

Two more hours passed. Deeks still under the influence of medication had fell asleep in an impossible position, his head in Kensi's lap and his body occupying four plastic chairs. Nate, Eric and Nell had gone to the cafeteria and Sam to the hospital chapel to try to get some peace. Hetty, had just spoke with Arkady and updated him about Callen's situation and the necessity of locating Anna, when she saw Dr. Costa going out G's room.

\- "Reyes, dear, thank you for coming."

\- "Hello Hetty. It seems that your troublemaker had done it again, hadn't he?"

\- "How is he?"

\- "I'm afraid I haven't good news. Last time I saw him his ear seemed to be cicatrizing perfectly, but now even if the tympanum was nearly closed the infection had returned. Everything was so swollen that it seems like he had been in a submarine of something summited to a very high pressure."

\- "A fighter aircraft."

\- "Why am I not surprised? Anyway, I tried to clean as much as I could and I performed a miringectomy, a procedure to put two tubes to drain his middle ear."

\- "So the infection in his ear is controlled?- asked Hetty.

\- "Yes, but right now his general condition is so precarious that his ear doesn't matter. In fact I wonder if I did right operating."- she seemed genuinely worried.

\- "May I ask you why?"

\- "He can't be anesthetized because of his compromised lungs so I had to do it with local anesthesia. He was reacting to the pain, Hetty, and his fever and heart rate had raised; he must be exhausted."

\- "He's a through cookie, Reyes."

\- "A through cookie? A bad ass!"

Back in the waiting room Hetty discovered the shia, her favorite Egyptian tea. She was more than moved. Even in the most dangerous situations he managed to get her tea, her dear boy.


	90. Chapter 90

A.N.: Time to get the team to close ranks around Callen. Thank you for being there! J

Chapter 90

That night Deeks woke up feeling each bone of his body. He couldn't help a moan when he sat on the uncomfortable plastic chair.

\- "Are you ok, honey?"- asked Kensi worried.

\- "Yeah, it's just the position, I'm fine. What about Callen?"

\- "They drained his ear, but his condition hadn't changed."

\- "That's good, isn't it? Stable is good."

\- "Not in this case Mr. Deeks. He needs to respond to the treatment as soon as possible on the contrary the infection will be shutting down his organs. I suggest you go home, you need to rest and this chair is doing no good to your leg."

\- "I want to see him Hetty."- He begged knowing that she was right. His leg was killing him.

\- "Me too, and I'm not going anywhere without seeing Callen"- added Kensi.

\- "I'll ask the doctor if it's possible, but then you two are going home."

\- "Deal."

After all day in the hospital without a proper rest Deeks wasn't feeling strong enough to use the crutches so Kensi found a wheelchair and entered with him in the I.C.U.

Seeing G full of electrodes and tubes and bandages was a shock. He was so pale that the flush of his cheeks provoked by the fever seemed unreal. It was painful to see him breathing with such an effort.

\- "Hey Callen! Hey man, I know you're there. I'm expert in talking to coma patients so…"

\- "So ignore him Callen, you're not in a coma, you are just tired."

\- "He is not tired, Kensi, he is sleeping, maybe we should let him rest!"

\- "Deeks, shut up. And you Callen, fight, you can sleep later, but not now, do you hear me? you have a test to pass."

A nurse entered to check on G and after noting his vital signs.

\- "His fever is raising, I'm going to call the doctor, so I suggest you to say goodbye before he comes."

\- "Callen, keep that in mind, beer is on my, pal, as much as you can drink. See you soon."- said Deeks.

Kensi was so moved that she only could hold G's hand as if she could transmit her force. The nurse came back followed by the doctor.

\- "Please you need to leave now."

Just before going out Kensi kissed G's cheek and said in his ear:

\- "Dance, baby, dance!"

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Hetty usual calm was replaced by the feeling she hated the most: fear. The doctor's news was bad ones. G's fever in spite of the antibiotics was 107.6o. His saturation was down, his left lung was starting to fill with liquid that they had to drain, and they had started a blood transfusion in a feeble attempt to gain some time before the infection invaded completely his lungs. It was a matter of time that his heart started to fail. The doctor tried to prepare her for the worst, and gave her permission to enter the I.C.U. to say goodbye.

Hetty called Sam and Nate who decided to remain in the cafeteria with Eric and Nell, and went to G's side. It was freezing there, the doctors had him in a cool blanket and a portable fan moved the air of the room. Callen's breathing was very labored, each inspiration seemed to be the last one.

Hetty remembered vividly the horrible nightmare when they called her from the hospital after the shooting in Venice. The flight to L.A., the bad prognosis, the minimal hopes. But he fought with all his forces and, as ever, he surprised everyone with his recovery. This time was different, he wasn't in good shape, he had been fighting for a long time and she wasn't sure of his determination to live. Because when he was determinate to do something nobody could stop him. This time she was afraid of losing him, because from the beginning she had the feeling that he was sliding from her hands, each time she tried to stop him it has been like trying to grab a wet fish who wants to come back to water.

\- "Mr. Callen, this attitude is inadmissible. You need to try harder, you're choosing the easiest path and you can't cheat this time. There's only a way, you know it. So stop acting like a spoiled fickle kid and fight like the man you are. I know you can and I here to help you. C'mon my boy!"

Sam entered the room, in spite of the mask Hetty could see that he had been crying. My God, if this was hard for her she couldn't imagine what was like for Sam. He sat at G's side and hold his right hand careful of not touching the IV.

\- "G, buddy, for once in your life do what you're told. You can't leave us, you can't leave me…"

Sam wasn't ready to see his friend like that. One look to the monitor and just the sound he was doing at breathing told him that just a miracle could save him right now. He needed a signal, something that showed him that he was fighting, because he could see that his best friend had thrown in the towel. He was in a dark place, as dark as the night without moon outside.

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G was exhausted; he remembered Michelle's grave and Sam, he told him everything but he didn't understand, he remembered the anguish of breathing without getting air, the excruciating pain, the fear, the fever, everything, but he had not energy to move, to ask them to stop moving and poking and cutting him, why Sam didn't stop them? He remembered Hetty talking, and Deeks and Kens so far away. Little by little the pain was going away as well as the hatted sound of the monitor. Now he was feeling better and Sam and Hetty were there. He knew it. In spite of the tea Hetty was angry with him, both seemed angry and he could perceive something more, something unusual… fear.

He felt like floating in a cloud, no pain, no cold, no problems. He could hear the guys and Hetty and Sam, but he wouldn't listen. They didn't need him, not anymore; they were together and more than able of supporting each other. He was in peace and so tired of fighting...

He had fought all his life for things that later he learned others took for granted: food, clothes, shelter, education, family, love... even for a name. He had fought to gain the respect and the friendship of the people he loved, he had fought to have a father, to have a girlfriend, to have a normal life and he had failed. He wasn't good enough for them... so tired...

...so tired that he didn't remember when he slept more than three hours all together, so tired of pain that he didn't remember last time he could put a shirt on without biting his lip, so tired of guessing...

...tired of guessing others' reactions, intentions, wishes, needs, tired of adapting, to fit, losing himself in the process...

Hetty... she would be fine, she had trained more like him, he wasn't special, she had Sam... Sam… his brother… he let him alone and hurt, he didn't need him anymore, he was safe now. They were talking to him, asking him to come back, to come back to what? ...

He was fine now, he had lived more than he thought he would do, he was in peace with everyone, with himself, with Michelle...

...Michelle... he wondered he'd meet her and her mum and her sister or if he would be alone all the time or if he'll just stop existing if he let everything go to the light...

... the light... he wasn't seeing a light... even now he had to fight for one? he didn't want to fight anymore... he was ready to let it go...

...the voices again, Hetty, Sam… what was that noise? A bip, again, another one… Banana's phone! the little one maybe in danger, Sam! go with her!

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Sam was praying, holding G's right hand, not ready to let his brother go. Not like that, not with everything to say. The damn black phone biped in his pocket, once, twice, three times. Kam. What he was going to tell the kids? suddenly a little movement in his hand.

\- "Hetty! Hetty he moved!

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Sam, please, Sam! please Sam, can't you hear that?! Is her phone, the secret one! Hetty, Sam! Go! ...

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\- "He is reacting, the phone! oh gosh, it's Kamran! c'mon G, come back buddy!"

Hetty hold G's other hand with delicacy, she felt nothing but cold.

\- "Sam, dear..." - she knew that he didn't wanted to give up hope, but then she saw G's expression change, at last a clear, but weak signal that her boy was there.

The phone biped once more and Sam blessed his persistent daughter.

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What if he was wrong? What if the dead man in Sudan wasn't dead? Why Sam didn't go with the little one?... He needed to tell them, he needed to come back…

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\- "Mr. Callen."-called Hetty.

G moved his left hand searching for contact and she hold his hand between hers. A little moan; there he was, fighting again.


	91. Chapter 91

A.N.: G is back! At least he is trying to come back. I'm overwhelmed for your nice comments, thanks a lot for your support J

Chapter 91

Don't you hear the phone? C'mon guys, please… I have to tell them… ok, focus, talk! It doesn't work! Open the eyes… it hurts, the light… c'mon… why is so hard to breathe? Everything hurts… Hetty…

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Another moan. A weak attempt to open his eyes, deep breathings and some pressure in Hetty's hand. He was trying, he was there.

\- "C'mon buddy, you can do it! fight! I need you here, Kamran needs her uncle Callen!"- Said Sam, just to add- "Hetty he is in pain, I'm going to call the doctor!"

\- "Go, Sam go"-said Hetty who continued to encourage G:- "C'mon boy, you can do it, fight!"

Seconds later the doctor confirmed that G's fever broke.

\- "I think he is in pain doctor."- said Sam.

\- "Please, wait outside, we need to do some exams."- the doctor and two nurses surrounded the bed, but when Hetty tried to go she felt a stronger grip in her hand.

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Hetty please, don't let me, it hurts Hetty, please…

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\- "He wants me to stay, do what you have to do, doctor, but I'm not moving."

\- "Ok, stay"- The doctor saw G's hand holding Hetty's and he knew that love is sometimes the best medicine.

\- "One unit of 0 negative and another vial of ampicillin. Let's help his body to fight."

G was sweating, shaking, his breathing labored. The nurse had retired the fan but the cooler blanket stayed. Hetty talked to Callen, reassuring that she wasn't going to leave, she told him to relax, to focus in his breathing and not in the pain, to try to sleep. After some hours of fight G little by little relaxed, his breathing deeper and regular, his saturation better.

Sat in front of Hetty who hadn't let go G's hand the doctor spoke to her.

\- "You were right, he is a fighter."

\- "I told you."- she smiled tiredly.

\- "Some hours ago I wouldn't have bet a dollar for him."

\- "And you'd lose."- smiled Hetty somewhat proud.

\- "He is not out of the woods yet, he had a long recovery ahead."

\- "Why is he in pain?"

\- "He shouldn't. He has the higher dose of painkillers he can have without depriving his capacity to breath."

\- "I know him and I tell you that he is suffering."

\- "Maybe he has a very low pain threshold. Right now I can't give him a higher dose."

\- "Believe me doctor, this man can bear more pain that any average person. Some days ago he had walked miles under the rain minutes after being shot. And the stitches in his shoulder were done with just a small dose of lidocaine."

The doctor seemed surprised.

\- "Then we'll need to find the cause, I guess. You did a great job calming him, he seemed to respond to you."

\- "Oh don't foolish yourself, doctor, he pays attention only when he wants, he's not good at following orders."

Next morning G's temperature descended to 102,2o confirming that the antibiotics were working. Sam substituted Hetty at his side and could check by himself how each time a nurse or a doctor touched him his heartrate sky-rocketed. Each injection entailed such a stress that the doctor decided to give him a dose of propanolol just to avoid a cardiac arrest.

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Please, Sam, don't let them to touch me… please!

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Hetty discussed the situation with Nate.

\- "After such difficult situations he lived lately I can't even imagine what is going on in his head, Hetty. We don't know what happened to him in Africa. Maybe he is perceiving danger, a threat in each intervention. Sam said he was delusional, perhaps the fever wasn't the cause, maybe he broke, but we can't know until the doctors lower the painkillers dose and he could talk to us."

\- "He is in pain, Mr. Getz, are you saying that we have to let him suffer just to know if he is crazy?"

And the day had just started. The cleaning of the wounds the change of IV the drops in his ear all was a continued torture to G that cried, moaned and fought even with the limited resources he had. His eyes completely unfocused and nothing coherent was coming out of his mouth.

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Not again, not again, I can't take any more, please!

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All the stress caused by the pain was affecting at G's breathing and once more the doctors were worried about the oxygen saturation.

Kensi arrived some hours later to allow Sam and Hetty a break. G was in nearly sat position, his chest and shoulder full of blues, his arm bandaged and hocked to monitors and IVs. His eyes were closed and he seemed to be resting.

\- "Hello Callen. I'm proud of you, you are fighting."- she touched the side of his face, but G slowly turned his head.

\- "I got it, you don't want to be touched. Don't worry, I won't. I'm just going to sit here, if you need anything I'm sure you let me know."

She smiled, Callen seemed to relax, and she was sure he was sleeping when a nurse came in. She rubbed a spot in G's stomach with a cotton ball to inject the Heparin. Kensi saw automatically G's reaction. Even without opening his eyes G tensed and started to sweat.

\- "Please don't inject him"- said Kensi.

\- "He needs this, lady, and I know how to do my job."

\- "But, he is in pain!"

\- "This is a tiny needle, believe me this doesn't hurt and your friend has so much painkillers right now that he must be in La-la-land."

\- "Just one second, ok, please?"- leaning on G's good ear she whispered- "Callen, I promise, it's a tiny poke with a very tiny, tiny, tiny needle. Even Deeks can take it. I know you don't want to, but you need it, ok?"

\- "If you're making such a fuss for this I can't imagine what you do when the doctor take the tube off."- Said the nurse injecting G.

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No, no more, leave me alone! Kens! She understands. Please Kens, tell them to leave me alone!

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\- "He doesn't want to be touched, Hetty, he is in pain, and you know what he can take. If we don't do what he wants he'll shut down. I know it!"

\- "How do you know what he wants Kensi?- asked Sam. The answer came in a whisper:

\- "I've been there not so long ago, Sam. Anyway, you saw him with a tiny needle, what about a blood test?"

Hetty said nothing. She knew Kensi was right, but she wasn't a doctor, and even Reyes Costa was lost with the symptoms.

\- "I'll stay with him tonight, I'll try to prevent people from touching him, let's see if he can rest."- said Sam.

\- "Let me stay Sam, you have to rest!"- asked Kensi.

\- "He didn't rest in three months to keep me safe, I'm not going anywhere. If you want to stay also, fine, but I'm not moving."

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Every time Hetty was in a hospital and needed some time to think, she visited the children area. The nursery was closed that late and she headed to the oncology service, little kids with cancer help to put things in perspective.

The rooms where different there, bigger, with padded floors made with big puzzle pieces with numbers and letters in the middle. They have windows instead of walls in the corridor so the doctors could see if something was wrong without entering the room. Another window to the street provided natural light and the other walls were painted in colors. It was bedtime and some of the kids were getting ready to sleep. Out of the corner of her eye Hetty saw a hairless little girl, not older than four and hooked to an IV trying to climb to the very high bed by herself. A nurse was at her side as well as a man, presumably his father, but they didn't help the little one who was moaning and needed to stop to rest before trying again. Hetty was taken aback, her first instinct was to go there and help the girl, to protect her from all the suffering. A voice behind her startled her:

\- "She is quite a fighter."- a doctor said. He was about Hetty's age with white beard and glasses.

\- "I see, not that the poor thing has another choice."

\- "Oh, no don't get it wrong. She doesn't want to be touched so she is the one in control. If she needs help she is going to ask for it, don't worry, she is a fighter. Her cancer is in remission and I'm sure she'll be out of here sooner than expected."

\- "What do you mean by she is the one in control, doctor…?"

\- "Landon, but everybody around here calls me Will."-he said extending his hand.

\- "Henrietta Lange, Hetty. Nice to meet you."

\- "My pleasure. Well, here most of the kids passed months even years receiving painful treatments. We discovered that the more autonomy they have the better they get."

\- "You mean that they can move wherever they wanted?"

\- "I mean everything. The pajamas, the food, the medication, everything."

\- "Medication?"

\- "Yes. We discuss the treatment with the kids. They all follow painful treatments, but, obviously within reasonable limits, we let them to choose when they are getting them and we let them to regulate his pain medication. You'll be as surprised as we were to know that their dosage is smaller than the one programmed for the doctors."

His beeper made a noise.

\- "I have to go. Nice to meet you, Hetty."

\- "It has been a very enlightening conversation, Will. Thank you."

Hetty went to Callen's room where she found Sam more than worried. G's fever was spiking again.


	92. Chapter 92

A.N.: Thank you for your patience and for your support, complicated the updating with family and friends, I'll do my best, promised! All my best wishes from Spain this time :)

Chapter 92

Next day a team formed by several doctors decided to lower the painkiller's dose that G was receiving in order to let him regain a little conscience. Maybe he can give them some clue about what was happening.

\- "Good morning Mr. Callen"- smiled Hetty.

She was rewarded with two beautiful blue eyes trying to focus. She touched his forehead, but G closed his eyes.

\- "Sorry. How's the pain?"

Callen tried to speak. Too much effort. He needed to concentrate in breathing.

\- "No more questions; don't worry. I'm just happy to see you, my dear."

Another attempt to open his eyes.

\- "The doctors are lowering the painkillers, if you are in pain let me know and they'll regulate the dosage."

A blink. He was listening and understanding. Hetty smiled again.

Kensi and Deeks arrived and Hetty took advantage of their presence to ask the wonder twins for a service.

\- "…Yes, Mr. Beale, oncology…. No, don't worry. Mr. Beale! … Miss Jones, please, I think two thousand will do it… yes, of course, as soon as the hospital bureaucrats wake up… thank you. I'm on my way to sign it."

As soon as G felt he could move he started his particular war; at first he just looked daggers at the doctors, then he kicked and cried until they put him in restrains. The next hours were just hell. G fought everything and everyone and the doctors were convinced that he was a psychiatric case. Nate tried everything he could to talk to him in order to let the doctors do their jobs, but he didn't get even an indication that his reactions were deliberated. From the waiting room Deeks, Sam and Kensi could hear G screaming. He was getting weak, but still resisting. When Nate went out he found three pair of eyes staring at him.

\- "For God's sake! Are we going to be here letting them to torture Callen?"- Deeks couldn't stand it anymore.

\- "They are his doctors, Deeks."- Nate was exhausted.

\- "And they are torturing him and we're here doing nothing!"- said Kensi.

\- "It's not like that! Listen he is hurting himself, he tried to move each time he felt a small contact, he screamed at each needle pinch like he took a bullet, he pulled out the IV, he freed himself from the restrains… I really think that his condition is not just physical. He needs to rest and they are going to sedate him."

Another scream.

\- "Does he seem to be resting to you?"- Kensi was more than angry.

\- "That's enough. Kensi, cover me."- said Sam getting up and taking his gun out.

\- "What the hell are you doing, Sam? Are you crazy?"- cried Nate.

When Nate tried to follow Sam, Kensi aimed him with her gun.

\- "Wow! You think that you're helping, but he needs to be treated or he is going to die!"

\- "They are killing him, Nate. You're in or you're out?"- asked seriously Deeks.

\- "I can't be a part on this nonsense. I'm going to find Hetty."

Seconds later two nurses and a doctor went out G's room and Kensi blocked the door of the waiting area. When Sam came into the I.C.U. G was trying to get out of the bed. He felt heavily on the floor where he tried to recover his breath.

\- "G, G! Listen to me, it's ok, nobody is going to touch you, I promise. We'll do it in your terms. Please listen to me!"

Callen was out of control he took the central line out and the indwelling catheter in his wrist, and then, crawling clumsily, he went to the far corner of the room where he sat holding his right arm and burying his head in his knees. Without touching him Sam checked that the chest tube was still in place and that the bleeding from the IVs sites weren't important. Then he approached with the oxygen mask. G was sobbing.

\- "It's ok buddy, they are gone. Kensi and Deeks are blocking the door. It's just you and me and I'm going to sit here with you. But you need to put this, G, you need the oxygen. It's the only condition. Do you hear me?"

Carefully Sam managed to put the oxygen mask in G's face and then, true to his word he sat opposite to him and did nothing. Sam could hear Kensi and Deeks at the other side keeping their positions, trying to gain time. The hospital manager arrived but they were not surrendering. Some minutes later without the adrenaline rush G started to shake. His blue pajama pants were not enough to protect him from the cold room. Nevertheless he didn't move.

\- "I'm going to cover you with a blanket G, it's just a blanket, ok?"

When Sam put the blanket in G's shoulders he moaned. Something was wrong, very wrong and Sam was ready to get to the bottom.

It took more than two hours, but G finally spoke in a tiny voice:

\- "It's broken."

\- "What?"

\- "My collarbone; is broken."

\- "That's why you didn't want the doctors to move you?"

\- "Yeah…"

\- "Why you didn't tell, then?"

\- "I couldn't; drugs didn't let me. It wasn't broken before. I'm not crazy, Sam, it just hurt."

\- "Your shoulder hurts."

\- "Everything, all the time. Don't know why."

G raised his head and looked at Sam's eyes. His blue ones full of tears that didn't fall.

\- "Nothing is easy, hey, pal? I'm sorry! We're going to tell the doctors and I promise you that everything is going to be all right."

When Hetty arrived to the hospital and saw the security guards and the police discussing about a hostage situation she knew that her team was implied. Showing her I.D. she managed to arrive to the I.C.U. where Nate updated her.

\- "I see. Please gentlemen, no need to use the weapons. I guarantee you that nobody is held against his will and that this situation will be over the moment I knock that door."

The guards looked at her not knowing what to do. The manager was hysterical, but Hetty seemed to know what to do.

\- "Mr. Peacock, let me handle this, please, or this hospital is not going to receive any subvention in the next years. Feel free to check my last donation, Lange, Henrietta. And now get your gorillas out of here." – Then she added:

\- "Mr. Deeks, please, could you show these gentlemen your I.D.?

Deeks opened just enough the door to show his L.A.P.D. badge.

\- "It's ok guys, the situation is controlled. Thank you for your help. This is just a misunderstanding and the police is taking over."- he cried.

Surprised and reluctantly the guards went out and Hetty the I.C.U. without bothering with the mask.

All her alarms went on when she saw Callen sat on the floor, pale and sweating and Sam putting a pillow in a wheelchair.

\- "Mr. Callen!"- she kneeled at his side.

\- "Hetty… it… hurts…"- he managed to say weakly.

\- "I know my dear. Try not to talk. Keep your strength and try to breathe deeply. Don't worry, we're not letting anyone to hurt you, but you need to cooperate."

\- "His collarbone is broken, Hetty, nobody noticed it. Maybe they broken it in E.R. when they put the central line on him. But I have no idea about why he is like that."

\- "We're going to find it out, and I know the doctor who can help him."

\- "G, I'm taking you out of here, I'm going to carry you, you don't have to do anything. Ok? Ready? At my three, one, two…"

G was too weak to even answer, he barely nodded and tried no to scream when Sam carried him to the wheelchair afraid of how much weight had lost his partner lately. He was sweating, his fever rising once more. Sam put a sheet over him and preceded by Hetty, they went out of the room.

Thanks to Eric who hacked the hospital files and made Hetty appear as one of the richest philanthropist that collaborated with the investigation against the cancer, and to Nell who, impersonating Hetty's secretary, located the General Director in his house in Aspen and made him to sign the special request, G could be transferred from the standard I.C.U. to another room. The manager who minutes ago called the police to arrest the team became suddenly solicitous and now he walked nervously around Kensi, Sam and Deeks in the corridor next to the examination room where G was with Hetty.

\- "Which color would Mr... Mr. Callen prefers? we have yellow, green, pink, blue..."

\- "Blue!"- answered three voices in unison.

\- "What kind of ejem... animals does he like?"

\- "Dolphins, he likes dolphins"- said Sam arms crossed imposing his size.

\- "Anything else?"- asked the poor man.

\- "Tea; no milk, no sugar, no in paper bags"- said Kensi stepping near Sam and crossing also her arms.

\- "We have to ask his doctor..."- Deeks' stare made him to add- "no milk, no sugar."

\- "No paper."- repeated Sam.

\- "Of course, no...paper, duly noted. I'm going... to..."

The manager finally flew out of there. Deeks, Kensi and Sam exchanged amused looks. Probably they would have burst in laughs if the situation wasn't so critical.


	93. Chapter 93

A.N.: In a rush, but I managed ;)

Chapter 93

Once the X-ray confirmed G's broken collar bone and a nurse patched him up the places where the IVs were, Hetty and the doctor approached.

\- "So this is the patient you want me to treat?"- asked Dr. Will to Hetty, signaling G who was trying to rest in a gurney.

\- "Indeed."

\- "You know he's not a kid."

\- "I'm well aware of that, yes."

\- "Has he any kind of intellectual disability?"

\- "No."

\- "Has he cancer?"

\- "No; but he needs someone able to determine the cause of his pain before it becomes chronic and he needs to be in control."

The doctor took Callen's chart and read aloud:

\- "Acute Respiratory Failure due to haemothorax, sepsis caused by an ear infection, open wounds, broken bone, severe sprain in the knee... well, is pretty normal if he is in pain it suffice with only one of these problems to be in need of a good dose of painkillers."

\- "You don't understand. With the same symptoms he was able to travel three countries just two days ago."

\- "Now, I'm intrigued."

\- "I want you to treat him exactly like any other of your patients."

\- "Anything I need to know?"

\- "He doesn't like needles, he's not good at sleeping, he will fight anything and anyone who he doesn't like, he loves junk food, he is able to free himself from every restrain, he'll know if you lie to him and he needs his family to be with him."

\- "Exactly like any other of my patients."

\- "You're starting to understand, William."

Approaching to G the pediatrician introduced himself:

\- "Hello, I'm your new doctor, you can call me Will. What's your name?"

\- "You can call me Callen."

\- "Hetty told me that you're hurting. Are you in pain now?"

\- "..."

\- "Mr. Callen..."

\- "Yes."

\- "Where exactly it hurts?"

\- "Everywhere."

\- "Does it hurt when you breathe?"

\- "Yes."

\- "Let's do a test. I want you to close your eyes and to tell me from one to ten how much it hurts when I touch you." - the doctor was raising a needle when Callen said.

\- "Six."

\- "I don't even..."

\- "Left leg. Six"- he insisted without opening his eyes.

Hetty had her hand resting of G's left leg. She took it off quickly and exchanged a worried look with the doctor.

\- "All right Callen, you can open your eyes. I need to do some tests to know how to help you."

\- "What tests?"

\- "Blood test, for now."

\- "No"- he said weakly.

\- "Mr. Callen..."- tried Hetty.

\- "I… can't… Hetty, please…"

Callen was getting more and more tired, his breathing was labored and Hetty knew that he was reaching his limit. The doctor intervened:

\- "Let me do a deal with you: we do now the blood test and tomorrow, depending on the results will continue."

\- "I can't take it, really… the tourniquet…"

\- "I see, too much pressure. But you know what? I have a device that can take your blood without a needle and without a tourniquet. We call it leech, because it kind of sucks your blood from the capillaries. In less than two minutes I'll have the sample and you can rest until tomorrow."

\- "No needles?"

\- "No needles. Deal?"

\- "Deal."

Minutes later fever was making G to feel sleepy. A nurse lowered the head of the gurney to a less straight position without compromising his lungs, and placed a children's book just in front of G sight hiding what the doctor was doing.

\- "What's that?"

\- "This, honey, is the story of a silly monkey."

After discarding G's arms the doctor cleaned with an alcohol pad a side of G's stomach.

\- "I don't want a story… it's cold! what are you doing?" – in spite of his exhaustion he wasn't ready to give up.

\- "I'm putting our friend little leech in your tummy, you see? It doesn't hurt."

G looked at the book. His parlor and the purple bags under his sleepy eyes showed how much he had suffered. Before falling in a deep sleep for the first time in days he managed to protest.

\- "I'm not a kid, Hetty… "

\- "I know, Mr. Callen."

\- "That monkey is really silly…"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

First thing Callen noticed when he woke up was that he wasn't alone. Sam, Eric, Nell, Kensi and even Deeks were in the room with him, sleeping in sofas, chairs and even the floor; that was an escort! But what are they doing there? Second thing: he was still in the hospital, but in a new

room... what was that? blue dolphins in the walls? kind of cool. It was dark outside, great to have a window. The pain was still there, nevertheless manageable, the chest tube in his place, but the central line wasn't replaced and the damn monitors were off. Great. He had a new IV in his good hand trapped with that plastic splint for kids impossible to take off. He needed to work a little bit on that later. Where was he? Carefully he managed to get up but a wave of dizziness caught him out of guard and he couldn't help a little moan. Automatically the lights went on and the five members of his team surrounded him.

\- "What are you doing, G?"- asked Sam running at his side.

\- "Wow! where is the fire guys?"- he was upset.

\- "Why didn't you call us?"- intervened Kensi.

\- "I just wanted to look at the window..."

\- "We can put a camera and you can have a look outside with the tablet." - proposed Eric stretching out.

\- "It's easier to put the bed next to the window."- Nell was more practical.

\- "But with the camera he can have another angle..." - insisted Beale.

\- "Who wants a screen when you can have the real staff?"-intervened Kensi.

\- "Deeks your crutches, I nearly fall again!"

\- "Look where you put your feet Nellysaurus. It's not my fault if I'm tall!"

\- "Tall and careless"- she accused.

G was suddenly weak, his knees bent and he was about to fall when Sam put an arm around his waist.

\- "I caught you!"- said Sam helping him back to bed.

Seeing Callen pale, in pain and breathing quick Kensi organized an excursion to the cafeteria.

\- "C'mon guys let's get some coffee, Callen needs to rest."

\- "We can have the coffee here, I have an app that..."

\- "Bealeee!"

When the party went out Sam adjusted the nasal cannula on G's nose.

\- "Why you didn't call, G?"

\- "I just wanted to have a look outside, not to start the Third World War..."

\- "Just take it easy, ok?"

\- "Where are we?"

\- "Same hospital; pediatric oncology ward; don't ask! Hetty thought that you rather be in that room."

\- "I like the dolphins."

\- "I know you do; try to rest G."

\- "Not tired"- he said closing his eyes.

\- "Yeah, sure."

\- "What are you doing here?"- he resisted to sleep.

\- "What do you remember from the last two days?"

\- "Pain... just pain..."

\- "Well, let's say that we're watching your back."

\- "Why… now?"

\- "Rest G."

\- "Not ...tired."- he managed to say before falling asleep.


	94. Chapter 94

A.N.: Merry Christmas to all of you who celebrate and my best wishes for everyone!

Chapter 94

Later at a more reasonable hour, Dr. Will came to visit. He read the chart and was pleased to check that G's fever was lower than the previous day.

\- "How're you feeling this morning Callen?"

\- "Better, thank you."

\- "The pain?"

\- "Still there."

\- "Your blood work revealed that you've an enormous deficit of vitamins B. Without this group of vitamins our body can hurt everywhere with no apparent reason; your never endings receive an amplified signal and a light touch can be perceived as a punch. We started yesterday a perfusion on your IV and you'll have one every day until your levels reach the normality. The problem is that we don't know what had caused this deficit, and we need to find out."

\- "And I suspect that I'm not going to like the way you need to find out."

\- "It's a simple procedure; it would take less than ten minutes."

\- "Which is the torture?"

\- "A spinal tap."

G closed his eyes; the mere fact of thinking in a giant needle in his back in normal circumstances would be bad enough, but now he doubted of being able to bear it. He shivered involuntarily and Hetty and Will saw it.

\- "There're ways to do this less painful. We can give you a Demerol injection, we'll put an anesthetic cream to numb the area and then we'll inject lidocaine; you'll feel the pressure, but not an acute pain. If it is too bad we can always stop."

\- "I guess you don't have another leech."

\- "Not this time, sorry."

\- "Ok, the sooner the better, before I change my mind."

\- "Let's go, then."- said Hetty sighing.

G was suddenly terrified. One thing was to be in pain and another one to have Hetty as a witness. He didn't want Hetty to see him suffering, not after what she had already been through; he knew that emotionally, even if she wouldn't recognize it, she was at her limit of tolerance. But she didn't trust him to be able to behave, like she didn't trust him to finish the Molina cartel.

\- "I don't want you there."

\- "Mr. Callen..."

\- "No, Hetty, please, trust me for once, I'm not going to kill anyone. I don't even have a toothbrush."

Hetty was taken aback. That was it. He was hurt because of her and she didn't even know about it. Sam arrived the moment they were taking Callen to the examination room and he followed him.

\- "Ok Callen, now the let the nurse put the cardiac electrodes in your chest to control your rhythm"- said Dr. Will once they were installed.

\- "Good. As I told you before I'm going to give you a dose of Demerol and then we'll start. Your friend can help you to roll in your side."

\- "Let me know if it hurts G"- said Sam helping him as gentle as he could to face him.

The doctor lowered his pants, took his time disinfecting his hip and back and injected slowly the painkiller. Sam felt G tense and he knew he was doing a big effort to avoid screaming and this was only the beginning. When it was over G was sweating and patting.

\- "I know it hurts, but it would be over soon. Do you think that you can put your legs near your chest and hold the position for some minutes?"

G tried, but when the doctor finished to put the anesthetic cream he managed to say.

\- "Dizzy"

\- "Because of the pain?"-asked Will helping him to turn.

\- "I think it's his ear."- said Sam.

\- "Yeah"- said Callen.

\- "Let's try another thing. I need you to sit down and lean forward against your friend."

Sam helped G to sit in the gurney and hold him in a way that his head was resting against his chest. He could feel Sam's compassion and he couldn't deal with it, not now.

\- "Sam, go, please."

\- "G, c'mon!"

\- "Don't touch me Sam!"

\- "Please, sir, don't make things more difficult."- said the doctor.

Letting his place to a nurse Sam stepped back behind the glass panel where he could see without being in the same space. He didn't understand why G didn't want his help but it wasn't the best moment to ask. It was hard enough to see him fighting the pain.

Hetty was more than worried. Why a simple procedure was taking so long? The door opened and a pale Sam appeared.

\- "What's wrong Mr. Hanna?"

\- "He get dizzy, Hetty he was retching so hard that the chest tube went off. I took a while to equalize the pressure in his thorax and he nearly suffered a cardiac crisis. They are finishing of sewing up the wound."

\- "Oh bugger!"

Moments later Dr. Will went out.

\- "Don't worry, he gave us quite a scare but he is responding well, his lung expanded and he is breathing without problems. He'll continue with the oxygen and now we have just to wait for the results of the analysis. The liquid seemed clear and I'm optimistic."

\- "Thank you, Will. Is he in pain? Can we see him?"-asked Hetty.

\- "He'll have the worst headache ever, I'm afraid. We have to move him and it's not the better thing to do after a spinal tap. He asked to be alone, so, please, give him a break, he really needs to rest.

Back in his room G was feeling like crap. The only advantage is that he managed for once to be alone. Curled in the bed he tried just to breathe, he knew that he had hurt Hetty and Sam's feelings, but he was just exhausted and confused: why Sam wanted to be every second with him if some days ago he left him wounded and alone under the rain? Now it was him who needed to be alone.

The hours passed and

the team watched G from the window in the corridor. He hadn't moved, but he wasn't sleeping.

\- "He can't sleep."- said Kensi.

\- "After the hell he had passed he needs to, believe me."- Sam wiped his face in a try of erase the terrible moments just some hours ago.

\- "Something is eating him, Sam, and he is exhausted."

\- "I don't know, I only want him to sleep, to rest, I can't understand how he is able to resist."

\- "I'm going with him."

\- "He wants to be alone."

\- "Then he'll have to tell me."

Kensi put the mask and the protectors on and went to Callen's side.

\- "What are you doing here, Kens?

\- "I guess you can use a pillow."

\- "I can use a double tap on the head."

\- "That bad?"

\- "Worse…"

\- "Do you mind if I lay here with you?"

\- "Be my guest"- G said trying not to move when Kensi installed on the bed with him.-"Deeks?"- he asked.

\- "He is resting at home, he's still recovering, but he is coming tomorrow."

G closed his eyes suddenly distressed. In a tiny voice he said:

\- "Sorry Kens, I'm so sorry... I should have protected him that day... I'm sorry."

\- "No Callen, you saved his life risking everything you had and you take him out of there when it seemed impossible, I can't ever thank you enough for what you did, I owe you our life together! And I'm really, really sorry for what I said to you; it wasn't fair, and I apologize."

\- "It's ok... it was my fault..."

\- "No it wasn't. We didn't listen to you and we weren't working as a team. You did everything in your power. I was... I was afraid and I didn't want to face it. So it's me who is sorry. I hope we're good now?"

G was unable to remain awake anymore. He felt as a big burden had been taken from his shoulders and he was so relieved that Kensi was ok, that the tension leaved his body. Leaning his head on Kensi's shoulder he barely managed to answer before falling asleep.

\- "...good..."


	95. Chapter 95

A.N.: First of all I want to wish you a very happy new year full of health, laughs and above all love. I also want to apologize for being missing without finishing the story. I lost the flash drive with the story at the security gate at the airport and the computer with my notes was in another country. Anyway, I'm back and the story will be over this week. Thank you for your kind messages, your interest and your beautiful wishes. I really appreciate you being there

Chapter 95

Next day G was even more taciturn, he answered with monosyllables and he didn't seemed especially happy when the doctor gave him the good news from the results of the spinal tap. His pain was due to a severe vitamin deficiency simply caused to overstress and the lack of nutrients; little by little, with the infusions in the IV, the antibiotics, good food and rest, he will feel better. His recovery was just a matter of time and care. But for now he was still hurting, on oxygen, with fever and not in the mood for talking.

The check-up and the hated drops in his ear had let G run down and taking advantage of the fact that he was dozing off the team went to eat some breakfast as Hetty walked in the ward. All of a sudden a blond hurricane bulldozed through the space.

\- "Miss Kolcheck"- saluted Hetty even before she saw the young woman arrived nearly running in the corridor.

\- "Hetty! Where is Grisha? How is he? Oncology? Cancer, really?"

\- "Calm down, dear, he is there, don't worry he has not cancer."- She said walking her to the window of Callen's room.

\- "The nurse had cleaned his wounds and he is resting now."

Anna couldn't take the eyes away from the window, G was lying on his stomach, his back uncovered, sleeping. The sight of his injuries was still chilling; he was so thin and pale!

\- "He seemed to have been in hell."- said Anna.

\- "He was and he came back. This time it will take a while, but I'm confident that he'll recover."

\- "It's my fault, Hetty. I tried to stop him and when I couldn't I let him alone. I should have known better."

\- "Don't blame yourself Anna, he can be more stubborn than a mule, we all tried to stop him, but I'm more than glad that we couldn't because now we know that the consequences could have been devastating."

Hetty updated the girl who seemed appalled. She had come back directly from the airport after several days of unproductive search in Egypt, all the tension, all the tiredness, all the anguish that she managed to push away when in mission, were finally taking its toll.

\- "I looked for him everywhere, in every corner of the medina, I've asked every pilferer, forger and shady of Cairo and I couldn't track him."

\- "He was in a luxury hotel, but just for some hours. The moment I knew he was here in L.A. I asked Arkady to pass you the message, I'm really sorry, Anna. You two had crossed your paths, I'm afraid."

\- "Yes, we had…"- answered Anna and Hetty knew that she wasn't just talking about the trip.

\- "I don't want to disturb him, I'm gonna go… please tell him… just… nothing. Bye Hetty."

And she ran again, this time out of the hospital.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nate crossed Sam at the cafeteria, Kensi and Deeks had gone some minutes ago to G's room just to be stopped by Hetty, G didn't want them there.

\- "Hi Sam, good to see you. How is Callen?"

\- "Nate." - He saluted – "Physically he is better than yesterday, his lung had responded, and even if his fever is still high the doctor is happy with his evolution. On the other hand he is grumpy and he wants to be alone."

\- "Is he sleeping?"

\- "You know it's his resist course. Kensi managed to make him sleep nearly five hours last night. A new record, but since then he just cat nap."- sighed Sam.

\- "And the pain?"

\- "He didn't tell, but each change of bandages, drops, IV or injection is a torture. He hates needles. I only hope that this ends soon."

\- "I know is hard, Sam, but you have to be patient with him. He has been through a lot lately. Give him some room, ok? I'm going to see him. Talk to you later."

\- "Yeah, good luck with that."

The room smelled at antiseptic lotion and the bandage on G's shoulder was a fresh one. He was obviously still in pain and more than grumpy. Even the nurse had let a tray with the next injection he had to receive because he needed a break.

\- "Hi you there!"

\- "What do you want Nate?"- answered Callen from the bed without moving or looking at him.

\- "I came to see how you are doing and to say goodbye. I'm travelling this afternoon to my new destination."

\- "I'm fine, thank you. Good trip."

\- "Sam told me you have problems with needles. I maybe can help you with that."

\- "You can't."

\- "You know, usually a traumatic episode in childhood make adults to be afraid of needles, hypnosis can help if you can recall the episode and connect with the hurting child…"

\- "You are kidding, right?"- now Callen was starting to get upset.

\- "I only say that you have to overcome your fears and …"

Callen took the syringe from the table and looking Nate in the eyes and without blinking stabbed himself in the thigh and injected quickly the liquid. It was his way of showing Nate that he was in control and that, in case they crossed paths in the field again like last time, he couldn't use this as a weapon against him.

\- "You didn't have to do that."

\- "What you call traumatic episode I called it normal. If for each one of those in my childhood I need hypnosis I would pass the rest of my life in La La Land."

\- "No worries, the only thing we want is your recovery."

\- "We?"

\- "Of course, your team!"

\- "They don't leave me day or night. They are driving me crazy!"

\- "They are worried."

Callen laughed bitterly.

\- "Why now?"

\- "Because they have a bigger picture, they understand what you did and because they care about you."

\- "I just need to be alone."

\- "Why Callen?"

\- "I come home and suddenly the people I had to run after some days ago to do the job are constantly with me. I can't help them, not now."

\- "They are here to help you, believe me. Maybe if you talk to them…"

\- "I rather not. I already hurt Hetty and Sam, I just need… space."

\- "I get it. Anyway, they are here for you and if you need me just let Hetty know, ok?"

\- "I will. Thank you Nate. For everything."

\- "Take care Callen."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

That afternoon G was restless; to give a break to his shoulder the doctor had bandaged his right arm against his chest with the hand touching the left shoulder so he had less liberty of movements; the fever prevented him from reading, TV was boring, he was in no shape to walk out of the room and above all he was sorry for Anna. Hetty told him about Egypt and her visit that morning and he was feeling confused and sad. It had been hard enough to recognize to himself that he liked Anna, a lot, and then that he had lost her because of his stupidity. Now he didn't want to hurt her again, he didn't want to be the cause of her pain.

\- "Mr. Callen you haven't finish your dinner. If you don't like the menu I can find something more appetizing."- Said Hetty.

The light in the room was dim, inviting to rest, even the dolphins in the wall seemed to be sleeping, but G, curled in the bed, couldn't do it.

\- "Food is fine, it's just… I can't eat all that. What are you doing here Hetty?"

\- "I know that look you have since this morning. I thought you might enjoy some reading and I brought something in Greek, I believe you have practice enough Latin for a while."

\- "It's late, you have to rest."

Hetty laughed.

\- "You have just stolen my line. For once let people take care of you, don't worry about me, I'm perfectly fine."- she arranged his nasal cannula, installed herself in a chair at his side and looked at him for a minute. His eyes told her what she needed to know without asking.

\- "Our Russian friend, she loves you, you know that, don't you?"

\- "She maybe cares, but she doesn't love me."

\- "It was Anna who using her father's contacts tracked you, who crossed the world to look for you and who, relentless, combed the city of Cairo after you. It sounds like love to me; you have conquered that girl's heart without any doubt. Why do you think she doesn't love you?"

\- "She told me she couldn't be with me because I'm crazy. I'm starting to believe that she is right."

\- "Well, then I'll have to work in a prototype of straitjacket, because last time I checked a regular one lasted barely forty five seconds on you."- she joked.

\- "I'm serious! – protested G- "I'm alive, I'm at home and I should feel happy and grateful, but I'm not; the only thing I do is to hurt the people I love."

\- "Oh Mr. Callen, you have to stop feeling responsible for everything and everyone. You only have to focus in your recovery."

She knew he was sad, his long silences, his lack of appetite, he had been through too much, alone.

\- "Thank you Hetty, for taking care of me, for everything. You saved my life more than once, you tried to keep me safe and I didn't listen to you. You were right when you didn't trust me, I couldn't even take care of myself. I'm sorry for yesterday, I didn't want you to see me with a giant needle in the back."

\- "No Mr. Callen, you don't have to thank me, "au contraire, mon ami", it's me who need to thank you. You're so bold, so free and courageous! you don't have limits or rules when you have a purpose and you have such a way of doing things that is scaring. It scares me! The magnitude of the mission against the Molina cartel was scaring enough, but you went even further, you had a bigger purpose and you succeed. And I'm sorry for trying to stop you instead of listening, if I hadn't been so scared I could have been able to help you."

\- "Scared?"

\- "Hell, yes, Mr. Callen. Scared of losing you, scared of the consequences of that impossible mission, scared for the team. It was a matter of fear not a matter of trust. Because I do trust you. I know that you are going to do the right thing putting everyone ahead of you, and that scares me, because I'm too damn old to lose you."

\- "Hetty…"

\- "It's me who needs to apologize for overprotecting you, for not helping you the way you needed."

\- "You did everything in your power then and you're doing it now. I could never thank you enough, really… and I didn't want to scare you."

\- "Yes, you scared me, and this is my problem, not yours. You have the virtue of putting a mirror in front of people and show them what they are lacking."

Hetty looked at Callen in the eyes- he seemed so young and lost! - before saying:

\- But at the same time you make me so proud! I think I never told you how proud I am and not only because of that mission, which was the bravest and more audacious strategy that I've seen in my life! It has been an amazing spectacle and a true privilege to see you growing up as a person, learning, fighting to become a whole and honest man capable of everything."

\- "Are you really proud of me, Hetty?"

Hetty saw G's expression change from concern to surprise and then to happiness.

\- "More than proud, my dear."

\- "Nobody told me ever…"

\- "My mistake, I should have told you before and more often."

She caressed him lightly the short hair and Callen closed his eyes feeling again like a burden was taken away from him. Suddenly he was tired.

\- "Would… you read for me, please?"- he said unable to keep his eyes open.

\- "Too late for classic Greek, let see what I can find here…"

Picking a book from the draw she started:

\- "Once upon a time a silly monkey…"

Callen's breathing was becoming more regular, his expression totally relaxed.

\- "Thank you Hetty…"- he said in a tiny voice.

\- "You're more than welcome, Mr. Callen."

Seconds later he was sleeping.

\- "Oh bugger, this monkey is more than silly."


	96. Chapter 96

A.N.: It's great to be back and to find you still like the story. Thanks a lot, really!

Chapter 96

Four days later Hetty discussed Callen's health at the doctor's office.

\- "He isn't out of danger yet, nevertheless his evolution so far has been amazing. His lung is responding, the levels of B vitamin are better and the pain is receding. I'm pretty confident now that the wound on the shoulder won't need a graft and his arm is also healing. After the last consultation Dr. Costa also confirms the good evolution of the lesions of his ear."- said the doctor.

\- "I'm under the impression that there is a "but" at the end or your phrase William."

\- "You're right. The infection is still there and so the fever; the blood work from this morning is nearly identical to the one from three days ago, when the improvement was so impressive. Maybe he is creating resistance to the antibiotic cocktail and it's time to try another one, but with all the medication he had been in the previous months a change could mean a step back. He needs to sleep more, is the only way his body will recover."

\- "You said three days ago?"- asked Hetty thinking.

\- "Yes, the day of the spinal tap after the chest tube came out I was expecting a slowdown in his recovery, nevertheless, in spite of the headache and the pain, he managed to sleep that night and when he wake up the next morning his temperature was nearly normal. That day he started to eat. Impressive, but less impressive than the next day: he slept even more and he was strong enough to get up and to walk around. Since then I noticed that he hadn't slept more than three or four hours on a row and his mood is not the best. I've seen this before, Hetty and I think that it can be the beginning of a depression. At this point I recommend a psychologist."

\- "Professional help didn't work with him, believe me, Mr. Callen is able to trick any shrink, no matter how good she or he could be. All the silence, the inactivity, I think that he is trying to figure out what he needs, the moment he'll do he'd let us know on his own way."

\- "I ordered a light sedative with the hope he'll sleep, but..."

\- "But he is fighting."

\- "Yes, and he is good at it. If tomorrow I don't see any improvement I'll change the medication and I'll consult a psychologist."

\- "Thank you William, I'll try another approach and we'll see whose method works."

Hetty had her own theory about what could happen with G, a theory based on her heart and the knowledge of her pupil more than any medical treatment. G's improvements coincided with the conversations he had with Kensi and with herself, she knew that he had pending issues with his partner, too much had happened between them and it was time they tried to fix their relationship. She was ruminating on an idea when she saw Sam on the corridor looking at G who was in bed at the other side of the window.

\- "Good morning Mr. Hanna."

\- "Hello Hetty."- sighed Sam.

\- "I detect some pessimism in your tone, Sam."

\- "Uh, no, well, yes. I'm worried about G."

\- "Any special reason?"

\- "Look at him, he is refusing painkillers, he doesn't sleep more than a few hours, he doesn't talk…"

\- "You're describing Mr. Callen normal self."-smiled Hetty.

\- "He seems so distant…"

\- "Go with him Sam, I think he needs you more than ever even if he doesn't realize it."

\- "He wants to be alone."

\- "I didn't say it would be easy!"- said Hetty walking away.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Callen had returned to bed from the sofa after a disgusting lunch consistent of a thick vegetable soup and a healthy boiled fish that was still swimming in his stomach. He was aware of the need of eating, but the antibiotics made him lose his appetite. He felt feverish, tired and sad. He knew he had to figure out how to work out a lot of things in his life, his relationship with his family, the real one- no news from his father or half-sister from more than four months- his friends, his job, even how to pay the hotel in Cairo, but he felt so low that nothing coherent came out of his mind. His only choice for now was to gather forces, to put his mind in survival mode and to rest as much as possible. The door opened again, he knew it was his partner even without turning his head, why was so hard to understand that he wanted to be alone?

\- "Hi G."

\- "Sam"- answered Callen tiredly without looking at him not in the mood for small talk.

\- "How're you feeling?"

\- "Fine."- was the automatic answer.

\- "You're not."

\- "If you say so."

\- "I know you're not feeling ok."

G didn't answer at once, he took his time but when he did he was all sincerity.

\- "I don't know how I'm feeling…"

\- "C'mon G!"- Sam felt the invisible wall between them again; lately it seemed impossible to have a normal conversation with his partner.

\- "How I'm supposed to feel, Sam?"- he asked angry- "I came home from another continent to wake up in a hospital with a tube in the chest, a broken bone I didn't have, drugged to the gills and hurting all over. Now I'm in a room with puzzles on the floor and dolphins on the walls surrounded by people obsessed with what I eat, my sleeping habits and my feelings when some days ago nobody cared! No, I don't know how I feel!"

Sam sighed perceiving his friend's anguish. Nate was right, G had a lot to process and it was his fault.

\- "I'm sorry."- he said softly.

\- "About what? You're not responsible for this situation. I don't need your compassion."- G's tone was brusque.

\- "I just want you to be all right. Please, tell me what I can do for you."

\- "There's nothing you can do, just leave me alone."

\- "No. I'm not leaving, we need to talk and you know it."

\- "Say what you have to say then"- G was challenging him now, unwilling to cooperate.

\- "I…"- Sam didn't know how to start, Callen wasn't making things easy- "I found your note and the envelope in the car."

Sam's sentence took G by surprise, but obviously he had started for the most important thing he had in life: his kids. He should have known. G said nothing, waiting for the reproach.

\- "I know about the gun and everything."

G's tone was softer this time.

\- "I already told you that I'm sorry. At that time it seemed the right thing to do, but I should have told you before. I had no right to mess up with your family."

\- "The damn gun… I was angry, when the director called me I was so furious, I didn't listen to Aiden then and I didn't listen to you later. I don't know when Michelle told you, but you did the right thing. It's me who need to apologize for punching you and for everything I said."

\- "I found the receipt for the gun and the picture the day I was cleaning the traces the police let at your house in a safe Michelle nearly opened. It was her gift."

Sam nodded fitting the missing pieces together in his mind. He looked at G, his eyes were shinning; he had fever. He was right, it wasn't a good moment for this kind of conversation, he needed to rest, but not before he listened what he had to say.

\- "I was wrong G, and I'm sorry. You didn't mess up with my family, because my family is also your family."- Sam took something from his pocket and put it in G's bed near his left hand. It was the burner phone.

G was moved. In a tiny voice he managed to ask:

\- "How… how is she?"

\- "Busy. After the exams- straight A's, by the way- she joined the school radio, the math club, the basketball team and she volunteered the weekends to help orphan children with homework."

\- "She is a great kid."

\- "Yes, she is. Thank you for taking care of her, G."

\- "She is the one who took care of me…"

\- "And she is still doing it."- Sam signaled the phone-"I told her you're in the hospital and that you're not going to answer, but you know how insistent she can be. I have to give you the phone because if I fail to do so she is capable of taking the first bus and coming here."

Both men smiled. For the first time in a long time their silence, only broken by the noise of the oxygen, wasn't awkward. G closed his eyes for a second and Sam took advantage of that to press the call button.

\- "What are you doing?"

\- "You've fever"

\- "Sam…"

A nurse entered the room.

\- "Are you ok sweetie?"

\- "Yes"- answered G quickly.

\- "He has a fever."

She checked on Callen who looked daggers at his partner.

\- "Yes, your temperature is rising, I'm going to give you a dose of paracetamol" –seeing the alarmed look on G's eyes she added– "don't worry, this can go on the IV you won't feel a thing. And you sir, you need to leave."

\- "See you tomorrow"- said Sam going out the room.

\- "Hey Sam!"- Called Callen signaling the phone-" Thanks"

\- "No, thank you."

Once alone in the room and before the sleep won finally the battle, G managed clumsily with his left hand to read the messages Kam sent him since he let the phone on Sam's car.

\- "Banana to U.C. I love u 2, but u're worrying me!"

\- "Please, U.C. answer the phone! U can't leave me like that!"

\- "Are u ok? Dad says nothing. I'm worried!"

\- "If u're in a secret mission tape 1, on holidays tape 2, without battery tape 3. This one is silly I just wanna know u're ok!"

\- "I get it. U're fed up of me, I'll stop bothering the moment u tell me."

G's heart sank. The poor girl had suffered because of him.

\- "Ok, last opportunity: u have to come back! I'm going 2 count 3 and if u don't answer I quit school and I go to find u!"

\- "1"

\- "2"

\- "3"

\- "In 10 hours I'll b there."

\- "Dad told me. I knew something was wrong. Please, please, please get well!"

\- "U can't leave us, not after mum, we need u! I love u U.C."

\- "Ok, ok, ok, don't worry about us, u have to do only one thing: fight!"

\- "U just fight, ok? U still have to taste the chocolate cake of that place in SF."

\- "I'll have all A's if u recover, deal?"

\- "I don't know if u're going to read this, but I'll send u a joke every day. U want me 2 stop, get ok! :P"

\- "U.C. Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry."

\- "Why do the French like to eat snails so much? They can't stand fast food."

\- "When I look at chocolate, I hear 2 voices in my head. 1 says: "U need to eat that chocolate." The other goes: "U heard. Eat the chocolate."

\- "Do you want to hear a joke backwards? Then start laughing."

Unable to keep his eyes open anymore G fell asleep with a silly smile on his lips.


	97. Chapter 97

A.N.: You really amaze me my dear readers. Thanks again!

Chapter 97

Next day Callen woke up before dawn feeling great. Without double thinking he took the nasal cannula off and went to the sofa near the window pushing the support of the IV. His right arm was still bandaged against his chest to prevent him from overdoing with his broken shoulder, but he didn't feel comfortable in that position so he decided to free himself. It took longer than in normal conditions should have and he was kind of tired by the effort, nevertheless the relief when he finally could move his arm was immense. It was time of getting rid of the child splint on his left hand and to end the torture. The IV was killing him. He discovered that without being under the effect of the hated painkillers he could move and coordinate better so it took merely seconds to take the thing off. Nearly three days with the needle in the same point was too much for his abused vein and the area was swollen and red.

G was looking the first pale sun beams starting to put some mauve on the sky when a light noise at the door turned his alarms on. Instinctively he hid behind as the door opened slightly.

\- "Kens! What are you doing here?"- he asked surprised at the sight of his friend.

\- "Gosh Callen! You startled me!"- she whispered. – "What are you doing behind the door?"

\- "I asked first"- he replied.

\- "Well, I convinced the security guard that my boyfriend is a doctor in this hospital and that after a terrible night he could use…" – she showed a paper bag that was hiding at her back –"… a real coffee and a double chocolate muffin."- she said offering G a cup.

The aroma of fresh coffee invaded the room and G smiled from ear to ear.

\- "Did I ever tell you how much I love you?"- he asked.

\- "Not enough."- she smiled back and closed the blinds on the corridor window.

They sat on the padded floor near the East window waiting for the sun to display his colorful daily spectacle.

\- "And now, what are you doing out of the bed and what happened to the bandages."

\- "I wasn't tired anymore and I don't need the bandage."

Kensi put her "whatever" face and bit her muffin.

\- "And the IV?"- she took his left hand and saw the angry needle mark.

G was munching happily enjoying the breakfast surprise. The coffee was exactly how he liked it and the muffin wasn't a doughnuts but it was really good.

\- "Ouch"- said Kensi for him.

\- "Yeah… I feel ok though, maybe I can go home."

\- "Don't rush things, sometimes instead of going quicker you're stepping back. I'm talking from experience."

\- "I know Kens, thanks, but really, I'm much better."

They sat in companion silence seeing the rise of the orange sun in the now blue sky and his far reflection on the sea. The birds were the first ones to wake up and soon the city outside and the hospital inside followed.

\- "The morning control is coming"- announced G.

\- "Then I better get rid of evidences."

Kensi was putting the empty cups and the papers in the bag again when G asked:

\- "How is Deeks?"

\- "You know, physically he is better, probably tomorrow he can leave the crutches. I forbade him to come here, he was too tired, but he is so worried that I know he isn't resting at home either."

\- "Worried?"

\- "About you, as everyone."- answered Kensi nonchalantly.

The knock on the door surprised them both. A nurse pushing a tray entered in the room.

\- "Good mor… what are you doing on the floor? Have you fallen? And the IV? Oh my God! Don't move! I'm going to call my partner to help you to the bed!"

\- "I'm fine, I can do it."- said G standing up without problems and sitting on the bed.

But the nurse had already called and soon the room was invaded by three more persons.

\- "Miss, you need to wait outside."- she ordered.

Kensi went out with a quick gesture of farewell, leaving G facing the probing alone and full of questions.

When Hetty arrived later to the hospital a nurse warned her:

\- "Your… Callen had a rough morning, it's better to let him rest."

\- "Is he worse?"- she asked alarmed.

\- "You have to speak with his doctor, madam, but it would be great for all of us if he cooperates with the staff."

Hetty advanced worried on the corridor, last day G had fever and today things didn't look good. Knocking lightly on the door she came into the room where she found a very pale G curled on the bed. The aroma of the coffee was replaced by the one of anti-inflammatory ointment and he had his left hand bandaged and his right arm again against his chest. Nevertheless the IV was missing.

\- "Mr. Callen! They told me you're having a tough day."

\- "I was ok until they used me as a dartboard and turned me into a mummy."

G closed his eyes again; Hetty knew he was dizzy.

\- "What had happened Mr. Callen?"

\- "The IV was hurting, I took it off and suddenly a football team started to poke me…"

Hetty took G's chart and she understood. Phlebitis on the left arm and hand, the medication had inflamed his veins making impossible to insert another catheter in spite of many trials. The antibiotics and the vitamins were given intramuscularly, and he had another round coming in the afternoon. Just one of these injections was strong enough to make someone queasy. She sighed; nothing seemed to be easy for him.

\- "It's ok now, try to rest, I'm going to sit in here, let me know if you need anything."

\- "I'm not tired"- he protested.

\- "The doctor says you need to sleep"- explained Hetty patiently.

\- "It's eleven in the morning, why should I sleep now? I just want …"

\- "What do you want, Mr. Callen?"

\- "… to go home…"- he said in a tiny voice.

\- "Soon, my dear, soon"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sam arrived in the afternoon to substitute Hetty, he was hoping for another conversation with his friend nevertheless his hope vanished in the haze as soon as he saw a doctor and a nurse to go out of G's room. As nobody prevented him from doing so he opened the door.

Callen was pacing from a corner to another looking very pissed off, he ignored Sam and continued walking until his breathing became more agitated, his limp more pronounced and he was covered in sweat. Sam who had tried to give his friend some space knew he had to stop this.

\- "G"- he called, but Callen ignored him.

\- "G!"- he said this time touching him, his skin clammy because of the fever.

\- "What?!"

\- "You need to stop G!"

\- "And everybody needs to stop telling me what I should or I shouldn't do!"- he cried stopping anyway and sitting on the bed.

\- "Who was that doctor?"

\- "A shrink, could you believe it? the first half an hour it was even fun to mess up with him, but then he wouldn't leave and he injected me a sedative."

\- "The doctors are worried because you're not sleeping enough"

\- "I never sleep more than five hours in a very good day. I just can't sleep when they want!"- he said with a hint of anguish in his voice.

\- "Just calm down G. For once don't fight so hard, let the medicine took effect, I'm sure you'll wake up more rested."

\- "I should have known that you were on their side."

G regretted his phrase the moment it came out of his mouth, but he was still hurt and didn't apologize. Sam, on the other side, said nothing. He knew anything he could say would provoke more pain and G was mentally and physically exhausted, so he decided to give his friend a break. Slowly he went outside and sat on his habitual plastic chair, if G needed him he only had to call him.

\- "Great. I screwed it up again."- murmured Callen to himself the moment Sam went out the room. He was feeling so bad that Kamran's message made him even sadder.

\- "U.C. Why do cows wear bells? Their horns don't work :D"

The torture wasn't over yet, he resisted every one of the planned shots plus the Phenergan to prevent him from vomiting the disgusting dinner and the Paracetamol to lower his fever. He hated to be treated like a child, he hated to be in pain, he hated that Sam was outside watching, reproaching him for not surrender and he hated the fact that he couldn't do it.

It was already dark outside when he heard the door opening again. His heart started to beat faster but he relaxed somewhat when he saw the new coming.

\- "Deeks, what are you doing here?"

\- "Sorry, I didn't want to wake you up."

\- "I wasn't sleeping."

\- "Sam told me they gave you a sedative."

\- "I guess my training is working better than the drugs."

\- "You need to sleep, Callen, I know how hard can be not being able to sleep."

\- "You didn't answer my question and I'm sure you've not come to discuss my sleeping habits."

\- "I… I can go if I'm bothering you…"

G sat on the bed his feet hanging on the side. From there he stared at Deeks, the dim light silhouetted his slim figure. Even in his pajamas pants the team leader looked imposing.

\- "You haven't answered yet"- G smiled and coming out of the bed sat on the floor at Deeks' side. Deeks put the crutches aside and also sat.

\- "What are you doing Callen? You're supposed to be resting!"

\- "I can say the same about you. What are you

\- doing here Deeks?"- he asked again softly as he started to take the bandage that kept his right arm again his chest off.

Deeks looked at him startled.

\- "You can look at me all night or help me with this."

\- "You aren't supposed to keep the bandage on?"- asked Deeks helping him reluctantly.

\- "My arm is itching and I don't need the bandage all the time. It's not the first time I have a broken collarbone, believe me."-Once free he threw the bandage at one side and scratched himself.-"Much better. Thanks."- then he added – "Is Kensi ok?"

\- "Kensi? Yes, she is ok, she's great. Why?"

\- "Because if you're here, still on crutches, it means either you really screwed something up or you lied to her."

\- "No, no… well, I… I told her I was going to my mum's… she doesn't know I'm here."

\- "What is happening Deeks?"- asked Callen worried.

\- "Nothing! It's just… I didn't want you to be alone chewing on things all night…"

Callen seemed surprised.

\- "I know you spent the night in the hospital with me when I was in the ventilator and I wanted to do the same for you."

\- "I'm fine Deeks and you are not well yet."

\- "You weren't ok then and you aren't ok now. Why did you stay with me that night if I was sedated?"

\- "You were there because of me. It was my fault. I needed to be sure you were going to be fine and I didn't want you to wake up alone…"

\- "What?! No, no Callen, the only responsible for this" – he said signaling his leg- "it's me! Kensi told me you aborted the operation just to save me, I'm alive because of you!"- his tone was pure anguish.

\- "You don't get it, do you?"- said G bowing his head.

\- "What? That you nearly died protecting Sam and I was blaming you for not being there? Or that I didn't follow your orders and I nearly got you killed in that motorcycle? Or that I panicked trying to get out of that burning building through the wrong window? Yes, I get it and I'm sorry, Callen."- Deeks put his head on his arm, trying to hide his tears without success.- "I… couldn't get to Michelle on time. I should have known, my gut told me something was wrong with that guy… it was my fault… what kind of detective I am?… then I was so afraid that something could happen to Kensi that I screwed the operation up… I couldn't control my unit I got my men killed, I didn't listen… and now I'm here crying like an idiot and preventing you from sleeping. Shit!"

G said nothing for a while. Michelle's death was a wound that will take time to heal if that was possible. He also felt responsible for not being able to save her and for not being in the right place when his team needed him.

\- "We all can pass the rest of our lives blaming ourselves for what happen to Michelle. I let her unprotected that morning and if I was able to make the connections just some seconds earlier probably she could have time to open the safe and get the gun. We can blame ourselves or we can learn to live with that and to work and to train harder."

\- "Well, I don't feel better."- said Deeks bitterly.

\- "Me neither."

The subsequent silence allowed Callen to gather his thoughts.

\- "I… I never had the opportunity to thank you, Deeks."

\- "You're kidding, right?"- he said surprised.

\- "I know that you carried Michelle's coffin, even if I had arrived in time I couldn't have done it. You kept the team together, you took care of Sam and the kids when I wasn't there, and I know how hard could be to deal with Kensi when she is bad. You supported Nell and Eric in the way they needed. Even if I could have been there, I couldn't do that. I'm not able to do what you do, I'm terrible with people."

\- "Callen…"- he didn't know what to say, but G went on.

\- "I forced you to work with L.A.P.D. knowing how you feel about it because of my convenience. I needed someone to trust there… then I pushed and pushed and you did great. Looking backwards I don't know how you were able to resist the pressure. I'm sorry Deeks."

Taken aback for G's generosity for once in his life Deeks couldn't find the words to express what he was feeling.

\- "You trusted me, I failed and people got killed and injured."- he finally said.

\- "Your heart was always in the right place Deeks. I trust you with the life of the people I love and you did better than great. The operation is on me, the situation was unsustainable for so long, I knew a rebellion was coming and I did nothing to prevent it. I learned that you can't control everything or everyone. I'm just grateful you're going to be ok."

\- "I owe you my life."- said Deeks.

\- "And a beer."- added Callen smiling and making Deeks laugh.


	98. Chapter 98

A.N.: And the moment everyone wanted has finally arrived ;) Enjoy!

Chapter 98

Next day started with another scandal on the nurse station that gladly Hetty could stop in time. The moment she went out the elevator and saw the doctor talking with a very nervous nurse who touched his face next to Callen's door she knew something was wrong.

\- "Good morning gentlemen."

\- "Hetty! you startled me!"- said Dr. Will. "I know I agree with you in having some considerations towards Callen, but this is just unacceptable."

\- "Could you enlighten me, please?"

After a short explanation Hetty understood, and she had to make a great effort to erase the smile of her face before going into the room.

Callen and Deeks were sat on the floor looking sleepy.

\- "Gentlemen! Care to explain?" – she said in her General voice scaring both of them.

The two agents started to talk at the same time making no sense at all. Hetty raised her hand and managed to silence them with that simply gesture.

\- "Mr. Callen, you first."

\- "I was sleeping, Hetty, and I heard Deeks cry so I went to help him. That's all, I swear!"

\- "Mr. Deeks?"

\- "I was also sleeping when someone tried to poke me with a huge needle."

\- "That one wasn't the biggest."- interrupted Callen.

\- "Ah no? it looked big enough to me!"

\- "The worst is the one with the white plastic thing…"

\- "Gentlemen!"

Both stopped immediately.

\- "What did you do with the nurse?"

\- "I take the Fifth Amendment!"-Answered quickly Deeks.

\- "That doesn't work in a terrorist court."- murmured G.

\- "I heard you Mr. Callen!"

\- "Hetty, I … I just reacted, ok? I was sleeping!"

\- "I saw the poor man, Mr. Callen, his cheekbone has the size of a golf ball and he probably would present charges against you. Anyway why Mr. Deeks was on your bed?"

\- "I couldn't sleep in the bed and Deeks couldn't sleep on the floor so we switched places."

\- "Oh boy! You and your logic…"

\- "What? Everybody wanted me to sleep, yesterday they even drugged me, and when I finally do it they attacked Deeks and poke me without warning. See?" – G answered signaling a red spot on his arm and yawning, his sleepy blue eyes the spitting image of confusion.

Hetty sighed; definitely she was getting old for this.

\- "Mr. Deeks! With me, now. And you… just get on the bed and don't move, ok? I'm going to try to fix this."

Unable to come back to sleep Callen picked up the phone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kam was getting ready for class when the black pone biped.

\- "Knock, knock"- she read full of joy.

\- "Who is it?"

\- "Nobel"

\- "Nobel? Or U.C.?"

\- "No bell I knock J I'm back. Luv u Kam"

\- "Gr8 2 have u back. Luv u 2 U.C. C U soon!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

That day and the next one Sam's visits were also short. Since their last conversation Sam had tried to approach G again, but it was an awkward situation; nothing was fluid or natural it seemed like there was still an invisible wall between them. G knew it, although he needed all his energy to fight the nurses and the doctors, he was again hooked to the IV, his right arm bandaged, and he had to promise not to sleep on the floor anymore. It was complicated to talk and G was aware that the situation was getting unsustainable because Sam was unable to rest. Nate and Hetty were right, he needed to talk to him, nevertheless he needed to do it in his own terms, because he couldn't hurt Sam anymore. He had already suffered a lot.

G was sat near the window, looking the gorgeous sunny afternoon outside when Eric came into the room.

\- "Before you say nothing, please G, I've bet with Sam that I'll be able to be with you more than five minutes. Do you mind if I sit here for a while?"

\- "Now you're betting about me."

\- "It's not like that…"

\- "Don't worry Eric, I got it."

\- "Are you ok?"

\- "The short answer is better."

Eric started to explore the room knowing that the short answer was the only one he will get.

\- "Hey! You have toys here!"

\- "Toys."

\- "Yep. This drawer. Legos."

\- "Ok, let's make Sam to lose the bet. What do you want to build?"- An idea was forming in G's mind and he would need Eric and Nell's help.

\- "A monster?"

\- "Why not?"

They sat down on the padded floor and Eric started to stack together the little bricks as Callen passed him the pieces, a difficult task using just his left hand with the IV and the damn child splint.

\- "It must be boring to be here all day. Do you want me to install a console or something?"

\- "I can't play Eric, it's hard to concentrate and I can't use my hands."

\- "There must be something that I can do for you Callen!"

\- "In fact there's something… if you have already won the bet can you ask Nell to come here, please?"

Sometime later the three of them were sat on the floor apparently playing Lego, but in fact G was trying to convince the others of his plan.

\- "I promise, it won't be long or dangerous."

\- "I don't want to lie to Sam."- said Eric.

\- "You won't lie, you just need to tell him that I want some chicken tacos from the restaurant Chihuahua at Marina del Rey. That's not a lie, it's a fact!"

\- "Still, Hetty will kill us…"

\- "Beale! Let's do it. We own Callen a little favor."- intercede Nell.

\- "Oook. See you tomorrow G."- he said unconvinced going out of the room.

\- "Thanks Eric!"- Said Callen taking the bag that Nell had brought. – "And thank you Nell."

\- "I own you much more than that Callen, I haven't had the occasion to thank you, for what you did in Washington, for everything."

\- "You don't need to, Nell, you did the right thing that day for Sam and the least I could do was to try to protect you. I was doing my job."

\- "And I didn't do mine."

\- "Don't be so exigent with yourself, you did amazing giving the circumstances and now, even if you disagree you're helping me."- smiled G.

\- "I just hope that you're sure about this."

\- "I am."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

\- "Chicken tacos?"-asked Sam when Eric called him.

\- "From Taqueria Chihuahua. He said that you're lucky that he's cheap."

First banter in decades, definitively G deserved some tacos and, anyway, the hospital wasn't far from Marina del Rey.

Sam was tired, anxious and sad. Tired because since Callen's return he hadn't slept one single night more than four hours in a plastic chair or in his couch, anxious because of the sinister picture he found in G's jacket and sad because his best friend seemed so distant lately that he didn't know if someday things could be the same between them. Chicken tacos; it was a first step, maybe they could share some minutes together later at the hospital. He wondered if the hospital policy allowed food from the street, but if G wanted the tacos he'll give him tacos even if he needed to bribe the security guard.

Sam parked near the door and smiled at the sight of a couple giving the rest of their food to a group of hungry seagulls. Last time he was there with Callen the seagulls engulfed nearly all their untouched tacos. The afternoon was sunny and in the sky, still blue, a lonely cloud was rocked by the light breeze. At the door a very young and blond waitress welcomed Sam.

\- "Hi, how are you doing? Please, follow me your table is ready."

\- "Hello, I don't need a table, thank you, I want just an order to take away."

\- "Your name is Sam?"

All the alarms rang at the same time in Sam's head and instinctively he touched the small of his back reaching for the gun, remembering that since he was at the hospital he didn't carry one.

\- "Yes…"- he answered.

\- "Then your table is ready. If you want to take away your order we can do that for you. This way."

Sam followed the girl more than intrigued. Behind the bar, in a table at the corner near the window with an ocean view was the reason of the reservation.

\- "G!"- he exclaimed surprised and terrified at the same time.

His first instinct was to tell him off for escaping from the hospital and to bring him back as soon as possible. Callen seemed more fragile outside his hospital room.

\- "Hi Sam"- said G.

He was dressed with his usual blue shirt, now two sizes bigger, jeans and tennis shoes. The bags under the eyes, the parlor, the healing cut in his forehead, the band aid on his hand where the IV was, the immobility of his right arm contrasted with his bright mischievous eyes.

\- "You really wanted the tacos"- said Sam sitting in a chair in from of him.

G smiled acknowledging Sam's effort.

\- "Last time we were here they were pretty good."- he said.

\- "Last time we were here I accused you of lying."

All cards on the table from the beginning. G knew that the conversation wasn't going to be an easy one, too much had happen between them and both were hurt, but he was ready to let all the pain behind.

\- "You didn't know what was going on, and I wasn't sharing."

\- "But I know you, and I should have known. I'm sorry, G."

The tacos G had commanded arrived to the table.

\- "Do you still want your order to take away, sir?"

Sam looked at Callen; he seemed to be fine.

\- "It's ok, we'll stay. Thank you."

G attacked the first taco. It was as good as he remembered, and much better than hospital food, but he wasn't that hungry. Sam was also eating slowly, food a mere pretext to gather his ideas. Callen was the first one to talk.

\- "Last time we were here you ask me why. Now you know."

\- "I know that you found a connection between Khaled and the Molina cartel and I know that to protect the unit you launched an operation against the dealers."

\- "The release of an international terrorist and the use of governmental resources have consequences. They had recorder the order given and I couldn't let Hetty and Nell to pay for it. I knew that the Secretary of Defense needed a big operation to be reelected so I offered him what he wanted in exchange."

\- "I ought to be the one paying for these consequences."

\- "Nobody would win with you in prison. Kam, Aiden… they couldn't lose you."

\- "You risked your freedom and your life."

\- "I didn't plan to stay in prison and risking life goes with the profession."- G smiled and ate some more.

Sam didn't answer, too many questions still buzzing round his head.

\- "There's something I don't understand. How did you know that Khaled was working with the Mexicans?"

\- "At first the only thing I knew was that Khaled wasn't working alone in this country. The way he escaped with the Toyotas suggested a big organization and knowledge, not only of the city, but also about the modus operandi of our forces."- G paused and tried to move the right arm, the shoulder was bothering him - "The son of a bitch didn't lose time in prison."

\- "But the Molina cartel… that's a long shot. Nothing suggested that!"

\- "The day of Michelle's burial I went to Little Ethiopia…"

\- "After working all night? Why?"- asked Sam.

\- "Call it a hunch. You know, usually it's easy to pick up information in the street the day after a police intervention, I was lucky because two Sudanese boys reunited with Ramón Hernández and I was in the right place at the right moment."

\- "Hell of a hunch! Hernández, the dealer?"

\- "Yes. I knew him from my days with the D.E.A. He was willing to prove his value to the cartel after his days in prison. Something went wrong and his body finished in Anna's truck. But I got a name, Aran Mafur."

\- "So Anna was with you."

\- "No. The moment I felt that things could get bad I called her. I… needed back up. She saved my life that day."

Callen let the taco he was eating. Anna. She was right she will be better without him, but, oh gosh, he wanted so bad to be with her! He tried to focus in Sam and to swallow the gulp he had on his throat.

\- "That's why you were late at the funeral; you were hurt and carrying bodies to trucks!"

\- "In fact it wasn't me who carried the body."- G touched unconsciously his ear remembering the pain, the vertigo attacks and the nightmare at Hetty's house.

\- "You know what I mean, G. Why you didn't tell that you were hurt after the explosion?"

G say nothing. He looked at his half eaten taco confused. Sam understood:

\- "That's why you sent a doctor to the plane to check on me. You knew I was hurt because you were. You got out that bus after me and you had already a broken rib. I should have known."- He seemed sad and guilty – "You should have been at the hospital, resting and you took care of everything. I always thought that it was Hetty who did the preparations."

\- "Someone had to do it. You know how Hetty reacts each time she loses someone she loves. I knew she wasn't in any shape, and anyway she helped a lot."- Interrupted Callen justifying her- "She didn't rest in several days, I was worried about her."

\- "Thank you G, really, that was more I could have asked for in normal circumstances, but being hurt... it was too much."

\- "That's what we do."- said G kind of upset.

\- "No, that was beyond everything we do."- said Sam looking at him intensely.

Callen didn't like the turn of the conversation and decided to change the subject.

\- "Anna tracked Mafur and with some of Arkady's men, we made a deal to exchange weapons selling cheaper than the Mexicans. Mafur died but the Russians started a net that boycotted every little operation of the cartel. At the beginning the idea was just to gain a place in the criminal organization to discover Khaled's connections, but when Hetty told me what was happening in Washington, well, I didn't have much choice."

\- "And you exchange Arkady's men by all the security forces in the city."- said Sam completing the picture.

\- "Anna was hurt and one of the Russians killed. The risk was too high and Arkady wanted to kill me."

\- "She didn't tell me…"

\- "Anna? Did you see her?"

\- "Of course, when you went to Africa she was looking for you as desperate as any of us. She was very upset because we didn't know about you."

\- "We aren't together anymore…"-G supported his head with his left hand, he was tired and all the emotions were starting to take its toll.

\- "What? Why?"

\- "She… I'm not good enough for her."

\- "What are you talking about, G? that girl is crazy about you!"

\- "I'm too crazy for her, I don't want to hurt her anymore."

\- "She loves you and I'm sure that she is waiting for you to call her right now."

\- "Sam please!"

Callen's tone was full of an anguish he didn't plan and Sam didn't want to push him. G seemed tired, but he needed answers, he needed to know. Slowly he took his wallet off and picked the picture Hetty found in G's jacket when he came back.

\- "Tell me about this"- he begged in a whisper.


	99. Chapter 99

A.N.: not an easy conversation, but Sam and Callen, both deserved it. Thank you for reading!

Chapter 99

G shivered at the sight of the picture, flashes of the morgue and the nightmare lived in Sudan assaulted his mind. Suddenly the smell of the tacos on the restaurant was too much. He breathed deeply before answering.

\- "When she was following Mafur, Anna made a picture of two men in a car. A black man and a Mexican one, Mario Alberto Suárez, from the Molina cartel. The eyes of the black man were so familiar… That picture was the connection I was looking for, but it wasn't until I interrogated Suárez that I got the name of Mohamed Shana, a well-known arm dealer in Sudan who used to work with Khaled. I saw him some years ago when I went to Sudan to look for you. He was at the morgue were I identified the body of your friend Michael. "

\- "And you were to look for him hurt and without any help."

\- "I wasn't that bad, and at that point, Hetty was ready to confine me and to throw the key to the ocean."- G was pale.

\- "What happened, G?"

\- "Again Arkady's contacts helped me to arrive to South Sudan. I needed to go to a UN camp near the frontier. Once there the General told me that previous day Shana was killed. I needed to know, I needed to be sure that he was the one so I flew to Malakal where the body was."

\- "It's war zone."- murmured Sam, but G ignored his comment.

\- "I found the picture in his sock and the cigarette paper in his pocket was a Mexican one. It couldn't be a coincidence."- G was talking in low voice staring at the glass of water in front of him. The memories still too painful.

\- "Who is Anthony?"

G exhaled and hugged himself with his good arm.

\- "How do you know…?"

\- "The day we met in the cemetery you said something about him…"

\- "He was just a kid, a child soldier."- G looked the sunset at the other side of the window, unable to face Sam. - "He and the other kids assaulted the jeep in which I was travelling to the camp, they killed the pilot and the guide. The car exploded; I was lucky, Anthony wasn't."

Remembering the events in Africa was obviously hard for G. He felt a cold sweat running for his back and the fever return. Sam's head was spinning with the information, he knew it was getting late and that probably he needed to bring G back to the hospital, but he had one more question:

\- "G, this is serious. Are you sure that Mohamed Shana is dead?"

Callen looked at his friend. His blue eyes shined with fever nevertheless his stare was firm and deadly cold.

\- "I shot the body in the head. I made sure he was dead."

Sam nodded, impressed.

\- "It's quite improbable he had the time to tell anyone about you or your kids. He worked mostly alone between L.A. and Khartoum and his contacts, besides Khaled, were from the cartel. Khaled's organization and the cartel are dismantled. Your family is now safe, Sam."

\- "Thanks to you, buddy, I own you the life of my kids, my life."

\- "I promised Michelle that I'd take care of you. So it was her protecting her family. You own me nothing." - His voice came out raspy, a drop of sweat fell from his forehead.

Once the information settled an immense relief soothed Sam's fears and he realized that he was abusing of his friend's strength.

\- "Are you ok, G?"- He asked seeing his partner shivering.- "I'm sorry I don't know how I allowed you being here for so long. I'm going pay this and we're coming back to the hospital."

Callen was feeling weak, overwhelmed by the smell of the tacos and by the noises of the plates, silverware and people talking, before he could even register what Sam had said, his friend was gone. A sudden fear of being again alone and hurt crossed his mind.

Sam was waiting for the change when he looked at G. Even from the distance he saw something that he never saw before. G's eyes were the same eyes of a lost little child. It was just a flash, in a second he saw the habitual stubbornness and challenge as G stood up. All of a sudden he understood and forgetting about the money Sam was at his partner's side in two strides, just before Callen could fall.

\- "I got you."- he said helping him.

\- "I'm fine."- was G's automatic answer.

Sam smiled but he didn't let G go and he didn't protest. Once in the car and before starting the engine Sam turned to Callen and said:

\- "G, about that day when we assaulted the cartel's house…"

G tensed and looked at the front.

\- "It's ok, Sam, I nearly got you killed, I'm sorry."

\- "No, you don't understand. I was mad, really mad at you because you didn't wait for me to enter the house and the bullet instead of hurting your arm could have killed you. I let you with the paramedic and I followed the ambulance to the hospital believing you were there. I looked for you everywhere, as well as Eric and Nell, who assured me that you were in ER. Your GPS was in the car. I never thought that you could be walking back alone, you have to believe me. I was mad because I was worried sick about you, pal, everybody was. Later, the moment we learned you were injured and missing, it was terrible!"

\- "I thought Hetty told you…"

\- "What? Do you really believe all this time that I knew you were injured?"

\- "It's ok…"- Callen felt suddenly ashamed.

\- "No, it's not G! oh gosh! When you called me from Hetty's home I assumed that it was Hetty who didn't feel alright because all the stress of the organization. Did you think it was normal that nobody asked how were you doing or to go to Hawaii while you were recovering from a serious operation?"

\- "I just… I wasn't important, you, the kids… after what you have been through it was normal that the focus was on you."

Sam was appalled he couldn't even start to imagine how lonely and sad had felt his partner all that time.

\- "I'm really sorry G, for not being with you, for all these misunderstandings, for not listening… you're the best friend a person could wish and I'm the luckiest man in the world for having you as a brother."

G felt his eyes filling with tears, Sam's words were like a balm for his hurt soul. Unable to talk he extended his right hand.

Sam was also more than moved, taking very gently G's hand conscious of his broken shoulder he attired him with his other arm and ruffled his short hair making both of them laugh.

\- "Let's go to the hospital before Hetty kill us."

\- "Maybe if we stop to buy some tea..."

That night in spite of the high fever, the cold blanket, the new IV, the antibiotic and the drops, G felt better than the previous months. It was great to have his brother back.


	100. Chapter 100

A.N.: I can't believe it: chapter 100. What had started as a silly fanfic story has become huge. As I told you before this story has a life on its own. Thank you for being there!

Chapter 100

Callen's little excursion was once more the conversation subject for the next couple of days between the nurses. His high fever that night caused the doctor's alarm and Hetty had to display all her skills to prevent a lung biopsy on one hand and an escape on the other. Since then, and once free of the stitches on his side and arm, G's evolution amazed everyone, and in a week he was able to breath without any extra oxygen.

\- "How do you feel, Callen?"- asked Dr. Will a week later after a thorough check-up.

\- "Bored."

\- "Ha, ha, ha. That's a good signal."

\- "When can I go out of here?"

\- "The moment you promise me to follow the treatment to the letter until your levels are back to normal. I rather let you go next week, but I need my staff to keep working in this hospital and with you here I'm afraid I'm going to start receiving resignation letters."

\- "Really? Can I go now?"

\- "Once we have the results of your blood work and your papers are ready, probably this afternoon, yes, you're free to go."

\- "Thank you."- Callen was so happy than he took no offense at the comment.

Hetty and Sam were on Callen's room when Dr. Will himself came into the room pushing G's wheelchair and announced the news.

\- "What is the treatment Will?"- asked Hetty.

\- "Basically the same. Antibiotic and vitamin B injections in addition to a healthy diet."

\- "What about pills? - inquired Callen who wasn't so happy anymore.

\- "It can be arranged, but not without supervision. You will need to eat five times at day, a protector for the stomach and even in that case it won't be rare if you vomit. Still you'll need the antibiotic for ten more days. For the vitamins with that dosage you have no choice. One injection at day for the next week, then one each three days for fifteen days and once a week for the next two months. Of course I'll need to see you once a week to check on your progress, I'm sorry for you, but this is not a farewell."

\- "You heard that Mr. Callen, medical supervision. Let me do some phone calls and we'll get you installed at Dovecote."

Callen was silent, all his previous enthusiasm vanished, though his change of mood hadn't gone unnoticed by Sam who excused himself and went out the room.

\- "Can I exercise?"- inquired G.

\- "Your recovery has been astonishing so far, but you have to take it easy."

\- "But can I do it?"-he insisted.

\- "Mr. Callen…"

\- "The limit is the pain, if it hurts you stop. Don't try to push yourself because the results will be counter-productive. That reminds me, I'll give you also a prescription for painkillers. You don't need to be in pain."

\- "I'll make sure he'll follow your instructions Will, thank you"- said Hetty who at that moment received a phone call and excusing herself went out of the room followed by the doctor.

Alone G couldn't avoid being anxious. Again Hetty's rules, just thinking about coming back to Dovecote with Daniel and Alfred being all over him gave him the chills. He loved them, but his last time there wasn't something he wanted to remember.

That afternoon when the papers arrived as promised, G was alone in the room. He signed everything and went to the toilet to dress up. That was weird: Hetty wasn't there to look for him. Maybe she forgot or maybe something had happened; the phone-call that morning, a new case probably. Sighing he pressed the button to call someone to wheel him to the entrance, provoking an explosion of joy at the nurse control, and mentally he said goodbye to the blue dolphins on the wall. Definitely he liked them. Thankfully Nell had brought him the wallet with his clothes and hopefully he could find a taxi near the hospital. Once in the hall he thanked the nurse assistant and stepped outside. It was cold and it felt weird to be alone again. Refusing the dark thoughts to enter his mind he got down the steps and looked around. A car arrived and stopped just at his side.

\- "Are you looking for something?"- asked a voice from the inside.

\- "Sam! For a taxi in fact."

\- "Well, I'm your ride, sorry for the delay."

Back in the Challenger everything seemed like old times, but it wasn't. G knew that he only had some more minutes of freedom:

\- "Can we stop at the beach before going to Hetty's, please?"- he asked.

\- "I'm sorry G, we're already kind of late, tomorrow if you want we can go."

\- "It's ok… you just missed the exit Sam."

\- "Don't worry I know a shortcut."

Exhausted and resigned G dozed off just to wake up startled when the car stopped.

\- "What are we doing here?"- he asked surprised.

\- "I know you don't want to go to Hetty's so if you don't mind me to stay with you…"

G's eyes shone of joy. Home. Finally. He went out of the car, suddenly the short walk to the front door seemed too long. He stopped. Last time he slept at home was the day before Michelle was kidnapped. It seemed another life, a happier time. He breathed deeply trying to get rid of the lump of his throat. Sam put a gently hand on his nape encouraging him. He understood.

\- "If you're expecting me to carry you across the threshold you're going to root yourself there."- teased Sam.

G smiled and walked through the door his partner had open.

\- "Surprise!"

\- "Welcome home!"

\- "Hello Callen!"

\- "Nice to see you, man!"

Nell, Kensi, Deeks, Eric, Hetty, Sam. His team, his friends, his family. All were there for him at his house.

\- "Hi guys…"

\- "We took the liberty of furnish a bit your house, Mr. Callen."

\- "Yeah, not time to buy a new one, but we lend you our couch."- said Kensi.

\- "Even with my pink cushion, you'll see it's soooo comfy!"- added Deeks.

\- "We installed you a TV, it has wheels so you can displaced it to your bedroom if you want."- informed Nell.

\- "And now that you can use your hands… dadaaaan! Play Station!"- said Eric- "We can play against each other on line."

\- "All that is all right, but you need to follow doctor's orders and a proper rest, so please accept the bed as a gift. I knew you needed one."- interrupted Hetty.

\- "I… I don't know what to say… thank you…"- said G overwhelmed.

\- "Don't say thank you so fast, in tw

\- o days you'll be fed up with me, because I'm going to be worse than that nurse who called you sweetie"- added Sam making everyone laugh.

The bell rang.

\- "Oh yeah, the pizza. I'm starving!"- said Kensi going to open the door.

With the excuse of finding some plates G went to the kitchen. He needed a second to process that the laughs and the jokes in his living room were real. Smiling he turned just to bump into Deeks.

\- "Hey Callen, in case you get thirsty…"- he said opening the fridge that from bottom to top was full of bottles of beer."

Callen laughed.

\- "I told you that when this was over beer was on me. And now is over, man. It's great to have you back."

\- "It's great to be back. Thank you Deeks."

\- "Well you probably need help with that, you still have my number, haven't you?"

Some hours later little by little everyone left, the last one was Hetty who didn't go before one hundred recommendations about Callen, leaving Sam alone with an exhausted G who didn't complain about taking his pills and felt asleep as soon as his head touched the pillow.

\- "So far, so good"- murmured Sam going to his room for the next days. He set the alarm clock with the time G needed to get the antibiotic and went to sleep. He was also exhausted.

At four thirty in the morning a noise woke Sam up. A moan, another one… G! oh gosh! He could hear his labored breathing and he was hissing in pain! alarmed he run into Callen's room finding his friend on the floor supporting the weight of his body with his left arm and feet.

\- "G!"

Callen lost his grip and fell down.

\- "Argg!- he cried supporting his right arm- "You startled me!"

\- "You ok? Did you fall from the bed? What happened? What are you doing on the floor?"

\- "I was doing push-ups until you gave me the scare of my life and I lost my balance!"- he said his now pale front covered in sweat.

\- "Push-ups? Really? With a broken collarbone and at four in the morning?"

\- "Four thirty. I was using only the other arm! I'm not crazy!"- protested G in pain.

\- "And I thought that Hetty was exaggerating…"

In spite of the fact that it was nearly impossible to create a routine with G who had none schedule, not fixed habits, not a conduct pattern, Sam managed to establish a kind of rhythm in order to make his partner to take his medication at the right time and at least two healthy meals a day. Each morning Sam cleaned the wound and changed the bandage on G's shoulder, and gave him his shots. Not an easy task for neither of them. Sam hated to make G suffer and G hatted the pain and to make Sam feel bad.

The first time the sight of G's shoulder, even if he knew the answer, Sam couldn't avoid asking:

\- "Do you want some lidocaine?"

\- "What? a poke there? no way! just do it Sam. It looks worse than it is, believe me."

\- "Ok let me know if it hurts and I'll stop."

\- "Yes mum…"

\- "Try to relax G."

\- "I'm relaxed." - he answered completely tense.

\- "It would hurt more if you tense."

\- "Sam! You're making me nervous!"

Even if he was more than careful and G didn't complain, G finished covered in sweat.

\- "Do you need a break?"

\- "I'm ok."- he answered still patting.

\- "Let finish then, in which hip do you want the shots?"

\- "..."

\- "G..."

\- "In the arm?"

\- "C'mon pal, is not the first time I see your skinny ass! I need a big muscle."

\- "Just do it quick."

When Sam saw G's hips he understood, both were completely blue from all the shots from the previous days. Definitely not easy.

\- "What about your leg?"

\- "It would hurt."

\- "No more than here."

G turned and raised the leg of his shorts; he was pale.

\- "Don't look at the needle G."

\- "Sam!"

\- "Ok."

He injected quickly.

\- "Too quick!"

\- "You wanted it quickly"

\- "Not anymore! and you didn't warn me!"

\- "You tell me to just do it!"

\- "I do hate needles!" - he said completely frustrated and in pain, hatting the vulnerability and the weakness he was feeling.

Sam offered him a lollipop.

\- "Orange. Don't ruin the paper."

G's smile illuminated the room and one more time Sam felt amazed at how a simple candy could turn the tough guy his partner was in a delighted little child.

\- "I hope you don't mind, but I've invited some people to have lunch."

\- "Ok, but don't let anybody to touch that fridge. It's for the party we're going to have the moment I let the antibiotic."

The first one to arrive was Hetty.

\- "How are you feeling Mr. Callen?"

\- "Better I guess, thank you"

\- "Is Mr. Hanna treating you well?"

\- "Apart from the fact that he wants to wrap the entire house with foam rubber in case I fall or that he puts three different alarms to let me know that I should take the pills, he can really cook and he have a bag of lollipops that I haven't found yet."

\- "Where is he?"

\- "In the kitchen making a salad or something supposedly healthy. Are you going to contrast information, Hetty?"- he asked amused.

\- "Always, Mr. Callen, always."

The doorbell rang. It was Kensi carrying a tray with cookies followed by Deeks who barely limped.

\- "Good to see you guys."- said Callen trying to pick a cookie.

\- "Don't you dare Callen!"- cried Kensi putting the tray out of his reach.

\- "Careful even without using her hands with these long legs, she can finish you, if you know what I mean."

\- "Deeeeeks!"

\- "Don't close Callen, Nell and Eric are just behind us, they are bringing the barbecue."

Callen held the door waiting for the guys to park, Sam arrived drying his hands in a cloth.

\- "Who can finish you?"- he asked.

\- "Kensi with her legs."

\- "She can kill you with just one toe."

\- "Thank you for the vote of confidence, partner."

\- "Well, be glad she is on our side."

Eric finally parked. The rear door of the car opened and a big boy came out.

\- "Aiden!"- said Callen unable to hide his surprise when he waved and went to help Eric and Nell with the things in the trunk.

\- "We brought tons of chocolate cake from S.F. Uncle Callen!"- he shouted.

Jumping Kamran went out the car and, as she always did, she run where his father was with her arms open. It was a little girl gesture that Sam treasured because he knew he was going to miss it very soon; his girl was turning into a woman sooner than he would have liked. Kam arrived, and that time her hug was for Callen, who moved, hugged her back, tight and long. Sam didn't care, G deserved that hug.


	101. Chapter 101

A.N.: Thank you very much for your messages, one more chapter to go and an epilogue. Quite a ride! ;)

Chapter 101

Days later, in spite of the care and the rest, Callen's first blood work at the hospital revealed very little improvement; the persistent infection was still there. Dr. Will scheduled a battery of tests for next day and the perspective of being poked and prodded had turned G grumpy and silent. Since his return everything seemed to be fine, he was at home with Sam taking care of him and giving him some space, the boys and Hetty visited frequently and in the good days he even went out and tried to exercise, but a new recurrent nightmare was preventing him from resting: he saw Anna being hurt over and over again. At first it was just at night, now the images invaded his mind every time. Without any energy to spare he was lying on the couch trying to read, on the History channel a documentary in French about the construction of the first gothic cathedrals and Bach was on the stereo. Sam was worried about G, he seemed feverish and unhappy. He took the control and turned the TV off.

\- "Hey I was watching that!"

\- "You're reading."

\- "And watching TV."

\- "You can't do both things at the same time!"

\- "Who says so?"

\- "G, TV is in French and you're reading in... "- he said taking his book- "Russian."

\- "It's not Russian it's Serbian."- Said G recuperating the book.

\- "And background noise."

\- "Hetty would kill you if you said that; it's Wachet auf, ruft uns die Stimme, BWV 140."

\- "I know, I know, Bach, but my point is that you're not resting."

\- "I haven't moved from the damn couch in hours!"

\- "You're overexciting your brain."

\- "My brain is perfectly fine, it's my shoulder the one that do not."

\- "I'm sure a doctor diagnosed you with ADHD."

\- "I've been diagnosed with all the acronyms of the alphabet and I'm pretty sure they even invented one for me; now it's called multi-task."

\- "You and your multi-task are going to take a painkiller and to sleep."

Early next day Sam went with G at the hospital where Hetty was waiting. Then the torture began, G could swear the nurses have been sharping the needles especially for him. They draw blood from vein and artery, they injected him a contrast agent and scanned him, they did allergy tests, they put him on an IV, they checked his ear, his lungs, his collarbone, they took a sample of tissue from the open wound of his shoulder to test a bacterial culture and he had to bear another spinal tap that made him puke even if he hadn't eaten since last day. He felt so miserable that he didn't complain when finally they injected him a painkiller and the hateful Phenergan. His fever was spiking. Dr. Will was so worried that he interned G again.

Curled in the gurney G seemed defeated. His eyes were dull, what the hell was wrong with him? too tired to protest he resigned to his fate.

\- "Mr. Callen, Dr. Will wants you to stay in observation until the results were ready."- announced Hetty who was also more than worried.

\- "…"

\- "I'm proud of you; finally you are learning to relax with the injections. You did great."

\- "Is it what you want Hetty?"- he said in a weak and tiny voice.

Suddenly she understood and touching his clammy forehead she said:

\- "No. It's not, my dear, and we're going out of here right now. I'll tell Sam to help you to dress up and I'm going to sign the release papers."- she said in a firm voice.

She was rewarded with a new blue shine on Callen's eyes. Once on the corridor she picked up the phone and after a brief conversation she gave Sam some instructions than the big man didn't like. Then she booked the first available flight to the capital. It was time to finish this and she guessed what Callen needed.

The moment G sat on the car he felt asleep, completely worn out, just to wake up half an hour later with the sudden jam of the brakes.

\- "What..?

\- "Four subs they are escorting us. I've already activated the alarm and the guys have an eye on us."- informed Sam.

High with an adrenaline rush G picked up his phone.

\- "Don't G, they can be listening."

\- "They who? What's happening Sam?"

He was still groggy to think with clarity, Sam was serious, but he didn't seem too worried and he hadn't picked the weapon. Something was off, nevertheless he couldn't grab it. In less than two minutes the cars led the way to an opulent mansion, the big golden gates opened for them and once in the main parking they were compelled to get out the car. Sam wasn't happy at all.

\- "Callen my dear friend!"

\- "What do you want Arkady? - He answered tiredly cursing himself for not being able to guess.

\- "Cannot a friend worry about another friend?"

\- "Last time I checked you wanted to kill me."

\- "Surely a misunderstanding. You know sometimes my English is not so good."

\- "Not now."- He said walking slowly back to the car.

\- "Leave him alone Arkady, he had a very tough day."- Said Sam putting a hand on the chest of the Russian business man.

\- "It's about Anna!" - Cried Arkady when Callen was about to enter into the Challenger. With effort G walked back.

\- "What about her?"

\- "I'm worried about my daughter, she is not talking, she is not sleeping, she is not eating, she exercises all day, she only plays with the console..."

\- "I don't know what can I do, she didn't want me on her life."

\- "Another misunderstanding, I'm sure. Please talk to her Callen!"

\- "I... I can't Arkady."- He was feeling really low, not in shape for any painful conversation or more reproach.

\- "She is so worried about you! She is blaming herself for not finding you. I'm sure that if she sees you she'll be ok."

\- "..."

\- "Please Callen, just let her know that you're ok. I can't bear how my little flower whiter without doing a thing. You own me a big deal Callen, and I'm not asking for me, I'm asking for her!"

\- "If you want to go just say it G"- said Sam arms crossed across his chest looking darts to Arkady.

\- "It's ok, Sam it wouldn't be long."- Arkady was right; he owned him and Anna his life.

Following his friend to Anna's bedroom he waited for him to knock the door.

Anna was sat on the bed concentrated on killing zombies when she heard the knock.

\- "I told you to leave me alone!"- She cried to make herself heard over the noise of the console.

The door opened and furious she turned her head to shout again:

\- "I told you not to… "- She shut up suddenly at the sight of Callen who was pale touching his ear. Quickly she stopped the game and an awkward silence seemed to fill the room. G was the first one to break it.

\- "Hello Anna."

\- "Callen… what are you doing here?"- She seemed genuinely surprised, her face reflecting one hundred emotions at the same time.

G said nothing. He looked at her, bags under her eyes and even thinner. Her blond hair in a ponytail, barefoot and wearing shorts and one of his blue T-shirts that he didn't know she had. She was beautiful, beautiful and sad.

\- "You made this."- She accused her father.

\- "I have just come to say that you have a visit, my little pearl, so I let you with our guest."- He said running away and making encouragement gestures to Callen who ignored him.

Callen stepped forward, the door closed behind him, probably one of the Russians following orders.

\- "You don't want to be here."- She accused G this time.

\- "I just wanted to make sure you're ok."

Anna smiled and shook her head.

\- "You're the one hurt and you ask me how I am."- She sighed.

He didn't know what to answer, instead he said sitting on a corner of the bed:

\- "Hetty told me you went to Cairo."

\- "I was convinced that I could find you."

\- "You tracked me."

\- "You weren't hiding."

\- "I was hiding in plain sight. Why Anna? Why did you want to find me?"

\- "I..." - suddenly she was afraid of revealing her feelings- "I was worried sick, your team didn't know you were hurt, nobody seemed to care that you were in a suicide mission."

\- "It wasn't suicide. It was just something I had to do."

\- "Yes, I know. You always have something to do for the others."

\- "You don't understand! Sam is my brother! Anyway, I'm sorry you went to Africa for nothing, I don't want you to worry about me, really."

\- "No, Grisha, is you who don't understand. I went to Cairo because I couldn't stand the idea of losing you and do nothing about it!"

\- "Thank you for caring about me, Anna, but it's me who can't stand being the cause of your pain, it's not fair. I was hoping we could be friends, but if I make you unhappy, just forget about me."

\- "I don't want to be one of your friends."

Callen stood up suddenly lightheaded, the blow of losing Anna forever was too much for him. If he wanted to keep his cool exterior he had to go out of there, his interior was even more broken.

\- "This is a farewell, then; take care, Anna."- He said in a tiny voice heading to the door. He was feeling like crap. That day could easily reach the top twenty of the worst days of his life.

Anna went after him and took his hand before he could open the door. It was a light touch but both felt like electricity, their bodies reacting, their hands unable to separate, their fingers playing by ear.

\- "What do you feel Grisha?"

\- "What I feel doesn't matter, I... I only want you to be happy."- His voice was pure anguish.

\- "That's funny because the only one who can make me happy is you."- She couldn't resist anymore and caressed him on the face outlining the recent scars of his eyebrow and chin- "I tried to erase you of my mind because I realized that I don't deserve you, you're so generous that I know I'm not good enough for you … but all this time without you I was empty inside … the idea of losing you…"- a tear ran on her cheek.

\- "I love you"- said G without thinking –"I don't know what you're talking about and I don't care, the only thing I know is that feeling like dying in Cairo my only regret was not being with you to share the sunset near the Cheops pyramid. I maybe be crazy, but I never felt something like that before…"

\- "I love you too! I only want to be with you!"

Anna took G's face between her hands and kissed him long and passionately until both were out of breath. G was pale and sweating, but happier than he could remember. The stone he felt on his heart had just disappeared with all the pain he was carrying; she loved him, she loved him and wanted to be with him, he couldn't ask for nothing more in life, but all the adrenaline gone he felt his legs turn into jelly. Gently Anna drove him to the bed; with infinite delicacy she took the sling and his shirt off and helped G to get rid of his boots, socks and jeans. She made him to lay down and kissed him again, lightly this time.

\- "Schuuuussss, sleep now, everything is all right. We have all the time of the world…"- she murmured on his ear. Exhausted physically and emotionally G was sleeping before putting the head in the pillow. Ana went out of the room to warn Sam and Arkady that G wasn't going anywhere and she came back to him.

\- "Should I be worried about my girl?"- asked Arkady.

\- "You should worry about your life because if something happen to him you and your men are dead. Understood?"

\- "What a temper!"


	102. Chapter 102

A.N.: I can't believe this is the last chapter. Tomorrow I'll post an epilogue, the one I've imagined before start writing. I hope you like it, please let me know what do you think! Thank you, really, for being there!

Chapter 102

Next day Sam arrived early to Arkady's house, he didn't liked the idea of letting G there the previous day after all the battery of painful test he endured last morning, he only hoped he could solve his differences with Anna, he really believed that girl was perfect for his friend.

\- "Sleeping? What do you mean by sleeping, Arkady? it's nearly eight in the morning, unless he hadn't sleep during the night there is no way G is sleeping now."

\- "Callen and Anna, both of them. You don't believe it, have a look by yourself."

Arkady went to the corridor and putting a telescopic camera into a hole hiding on the wall, he showed Sam the two sleeping figures.

\- "Really? You put a camera in your daughter's room?"

\- "Who does not?"

G woke up with a strange sensation that he didn't recognize; something was missing. Without opening his eyes he breathed deeply and then he understood: he wasn't in pain, in fact he was feeling good. Turning his head on the pillow he saw Anna and his heart jumped with joy, how a woman like this could possibly love me? He thought. He didn't care, he was simply resolute to enjoy every single second with her. Gently he took a rebel lock off her face. She stretched.

\- "Good morning."- She said smiling.

\- "Morning."

\- "I thought it was a dream."

\- "Maybe it is."- answered G still wondering where the pain had gone.

\- "No it isn't."

\- "How do you know?"

\- "I'm starving!"

From the other side of the door Sam heard the most beautiful sound he heard in months: G's laugh. For a second he and Arkady exchanged a stare of complicity.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

One week later Dr. Will couldn't believe the results of the blood test, he had never had a patient like Callen, Hetty was right his body just reacted according to his feelings. The infection was gone and G got rid of the hated antibiotics. He still needed to take the vitamins for the next couple of months, but his improvement was so amazing that he discharged him.

As promised the party was epic even though the team wasn't able to finish the beer stocked on Callen's fridge. I took only two bottles for G to get drunk, but in his discharge half of it was enough to make Eric sleep. They all finished sleeping on Callen's floor after being laughing like idiots for so long that Deeks was sure of having cramps on his stomach muscles.

Since Anna came back to G's life and his friend was out of danger Sam had move back to his own house. On one hand he felt lonely, on the other one he was aware that he needed time alone, that he was still hurting and processing Michelle's absence. Every morning he passed by G's house to take care of his shoulder and gave him the shot, but he knew that his friend was also longing for his independence.

That day after a nice walk on the beach Sam and G went to the office with a box of doughnuts. The Spanish mission was finally ruling one hundred per cent and it seemed as busy as always. The guys were in the bull pen, but the first thing G noticed was the kettle on. Smiling he approached nearly running to Hetty's desk.

\- "Hetty! Where have you been?"

\- "Good morning Mr. Callen, can I offer you some tea?"- she poured him a cup without waiting for an answer.

\- "Something fancy?"- he asked accepting the tea and sitting in the chair in front of her desk crossing his legs in a relaxed posture.

\- "The always reliable Ceylan tea. It would booster your immune system and it's damn good. You're looking well Mr. Callen."- she was indeed pleased to see how her pupil had gained some weight and color and seemed nearly as full of energy as always.

\- "I feel good. You didn't answer my first question."- He inquired.

\- "I've been in Washington"- she said, but sensing Callen tense she added quickly - "You may know that Mr. Edmond Richardson has been reelected and I just went to collect the price for the services provided. I took the liberty to deposit in your bank account the sum of the rent of the private jet, the full trip and stay of your team in Hawaii, the price of the funeral services and related expenses, the approximate sum spent in your street army, several motel rooms and medical supplies and even the price of a certain motorcycle that rendered good service in spite of the damaged caused."

G couldn't hide his surprise, he hadn't thought about the money at all.

\- "A generous coin transfer has been made to the Fairmont Nile City Hotel in Cairo on behalf of a certain Faisal bin Salman bin Abdulaziz Al Saud Saudi prince, but next time I'll appreciate if you try to lower your standard."

\- "It was you who told me once that extraordinary circumstances required extraordinary measures." - He smiled- "Thank you, Hetty."

\- "That's the least I can do. Knowing you I'm sure that you'll be pleased to learn that an anonymous donation was done to the U.N. refugees camp at the frontier in South Sudan, General Bupuki and his wife are probably now enjoying a dinner in the Eiffel tower."

\- "How do you…?"

\- "You were burning in fever when you asked me to get that man to Paris. I've learned to listen to you Mr. Callen."

G was moved, that was much more that he could hope. Trying to hide his emotions he put the cup on the table with the intention of leaving, but Hetty stopped his movement with a gesture and a smile; G sat up again gulping. She took something from her drawer, then, surrounding the desk, she stood in front of G and with both hands, in the Asian way, she offered him a blue velvet box. G looked at her enigmatic smile with an interrogation in his stare.

\- "Mr. Callen it's my honor and my privilege to present you in the name of the Congress of the United States of America the Distinguished Service Cross for your services to this country."

Now G was completely shocked. In spite of the sling he took the box with both hands and opened it. A golden cross in a ribbon with the colors of the American flag shined from the bottom. Speechless G touched it lightly.

\- "I... I can't accept that, Hetty, I don't deserve it."

\- "Oh boy! You deserve more than that my dear."

\- "It was a team work, the stupid mission was just a way to get rid of a bigger problem."

\- "I knew you were going to say that, and I made sure each member of your team get one of these."

\- "Anyway, this is an honor I don't deserve; my intentions weren't to serve my country."

\- "I already accepted the cross in your behalf Mr. Callen, I'm afraid you can't return it. Only the Congress could take it from you."

G touched once more the golden cross and the beautiful ribbon, then he closed the box and resolute he said:

\- "Ok, then, thank you, but I need a favor Hetty."

And taking a white card and a fountain pen from the desk he wrote something that he handed Hetty with the box. Then he recovered his cup and drank his tea as if nothing had happened.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The days seemed longer as calm had regained the life in the N.C.I.S.'s unit. Deeks and Callen needed still to get cleared for duty and Sam and Kensi were patiently helping them, switching partners for their training. Kensi and G started that day at eight in the morning in Santa Monica beach.

\- "Let's walk first to warm up."

\- "Ok. But don't go easy on me Kens."

\- "Don't worry baby, at the end of the day you will be begging to stop. Let's go! Oh, no, not here, there!"

Kensi pushed Callen to the sea shore, the freezing water covering his feet.

\- "It's cold!"

\- "C'mon, in straight line! Chicken who back up first!

\- "Chicken, really?

\- "Yes chicken!

\- "It's funny Sam is a mother hen."

\- "And Deeks a rooster."

\- "Ha, ha, ha!"

\- "The wonder twins..."

\- "The little chicks."

\- "Cluck -cluck -cluck"

Laughing they started to walk along the beach; sometimes the water covered them until the waist some others didn't reach their feet.

The sun was warm, the breeze nice and the conversation funny. One hour and a half later they arrived at the end of the beach; G was more than tired, his muscles acknowledging the effort after all the inactivity time; nevertheless he asked:

\- "Nice warming up. When I start the training?"

\- "Are you kidding? Three and a half miles fighting the water. Aerobic and anaerobic exercise. We've worked abductors, biceps, gemelus, extensors and flexors in addition to balance and breathing. Tomorrow your legs will be more than stiff. I don't know you, but I'm starving I certainly could kill for some sugar."

G said nothing looking at her with a surprise face.

\- "You're welcome, breakfast is on you."- She said running out of the water.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

That afternoon Anna sent a text message to G; usually he spent the mornings training and the afternoons she was free, they do plans together. Nothing special, mostly a film, a game, reading together or, in a good day a walk and a restaurant, as G wasn't still strong enough. His answer this time was a GPS location. Oh gosh! A cold sweat run on her back, the address in Santa Monica was near the gross motel where she found Callen bleeding with his back and shoulder with the skin off and fighting to remain conscious. What had he done this time? Anguished she ran out the house, got into the car and arrived to a modern apartment building in no time. She was picking the first aid kit from the truck when another text announced her to go to the last floor. That was good, he was in enough shape to write. With her heart pounding she got no patience to wait for the elevator and she ran upstairs to a marble hall. A door was open and she rushed into the room slamming the door behind her. The natural light was dim, a crystal wall allowed the sunset to enter into the apartment. Anna ran inside out of breath and let the bag hit the floor.

\- "That was fast!"- exclaimed G smiling.

He was wearing one of the Hetty's fancy suits and lighting a candle in the middle of a settle table where a bag with two chili hot-dog from Jody Maroni's Sausage Kingdom was waiting to be served.

Anna was still shaking, tears in her eyes.

\- "Hey, what's up?"- asked G approaching her out of clue.

The moment she processed that he wasn't dying she ran to him and punched G on the chest.

\- "Ouch!"

\- "You… you're…"- unable to find the words she kissed him long and passionate taking G by surprise.

She took his jacket off and roughly opened his shirt sending the pearl buttons to fly. "Oh, oh, Hetty"- thought Callen, but carrying Anna to the bed he erased her image from his mind. He'll deal with the consequences later. They made love fast, hard, getting swept up in passion, the urgency of two bodies missing each other.

\- "Anna Kolcheck, what I'm going to do with you?"- Asked G once he recovered his breath.

\- "I may have two or three things in mind…"- She laughed and let him kiss her, tenderly this time.

The sunset made way to a gorgeous night and the night to a timid light, all of them witness of the laughs, love, passion, two cold hot-dogs and a burned down candle.


	103. Chapter 103

A.N.: So this is the end of the road. What a journey! Four months, more that 350 pages, nearly a daily update, the challenge of writing in English. I couldn't never have done it without your help, your support, your indulgence and your patience. The fact of knowing that you we're there waiting for another chapter, encouraging me ,was just the most rewarding thing I could have hoped. I would like to thank specially: countrygirluk56, Amjm, ssl71, Mulderette, Dramamama5, Navyfan, Pittiplatsch, lizard1969,cjanff, Petunia3116,Char,black blade1, hagten33, rubberduckybugati, angel-castiel-rules-the-world, NCISLA FAN, Anonymous, thunderiwo, .65, Orangetails, Chazidasity, OyeOye and all the Guest (specially the one who needs this to sleep;)) you are great, really, it has been a pleasure to share this with you and I'm going miss you all! For all the timid readers, please, don't be shy! I'd love to know what you think no matter in what language.

Enjoy the last one! :)

Epilogue

The marine breeze was getting chilly as the sun set on the orange and purple sky in Santa Monica that gorgeous December 24th.

G had been swimming in the dark ocean until the waves, the tide and the cold temperature made the task dangerous. He felt free in the water and now soaking wet and shaking he ran to the spot where he let the towel and the bag just to find his partner with a disapproving gesture, holding it. He knew he was worried about him.

\- "Do you know that this is the sharks' favorite time of the day to eat?"- Saluted Sam as G got rid of the neoprene his teeth chattering.

\- "Don't worry I'm not even an appetizer, I'm too skinny for a snack. They prefer big guys like you." – Teased Callen who in his Hawaiian blue and white bath suit looked like a teenager.

He had gained some weight, muscle above all, not enough yet to cover his ribs and the outdoors activities had changed the parlor into a healthier tan.

Sam shuddered as each time he saw G's scars. His shoulder was now covered by a thin layer of pink skin that still, two months later, needed care and profound hydration. He had been so close to lose him! He barely could control the impulse of wrapping him with the towel and hugging him to give him some warm, the same way he used to do with his kids when little. G looked at him, amused.

\- "What?"- asked Sam.

\- "I know that look and you're not going to do it."- said Callen holding the towel and starting to walk to the restaurant where they were going to have dinner with Hetty and the guys.

\- "What are you talking about?"- Sam took the neoprene and the bag and followed him.

\- "You have that daddy bear look, and nope, you're not going to hug me."- he said running and laughing.

\- "I'm not a daddy bear and you're not ready for one of my hugs."- Sam answered defensively and kind of annoyed that his friend could read so easily well his thoughts.

G was laughing so hard that he stepped on the towel and fell down on the now cold sand. Sam arrived to his side.

\- "Have you finished?" – He said offering G a hand to get up.

\- "You know it's true. These brown eyes of you can't lie to me."- He took Sam's hand and putting his heels against the sand stood up.

\- "C'mon G. You and your silly theories. We're going to be late!"

Sam patted his partner's back lightly and let his hand over his shoulder. G didn't protest, in fact it was a comforting feeling.

Ten minutes later after a quick shower at the beach facilities and freshly changed into and a light blue shirt tucked in his habitual jeans held in place by a leather belt, Callen joined Sam who anxiously signaled his watch.

The little restaurant on the beach was already crowded when they arrived. The palms with the Christmas balls, the bamboo decoration, the Californian music and the amber light created a cozy atmosphere. Anna jumped at G's arms and kissed him intensely on the lips.

\- "Wow, wow what are you going to leave for dessert, Miss Kolcheck?"- teased Deeks offering G a bottle of beer.

\- "You don't need to know, Deeks."- He said toasting with the butt of the bottle.

\- "What Deeks doesn't need to know?" – Asked Kensi approaching to toast with G who kissed her lightly on the cheek.

\- "What I'm getting as a dessert."- Callen answered in a conspiratorial tone sipping his beer.

\- "I thought it was my dessert we were talking about."- Joked Anna.

\- "Deeks, don't."- Menaced Kensi.

\- "Don't what?" –Said Deeks going to the table followed by the others.

\- "I know that look."

\- "What look?"

Sam and G started to laugh.

\- "That look! Agggh! You're…!"

\- "Ouch! Kensiiiii my aaarm!"

Eric interrupted:

\- "Guys, guys c'mon! Hetty has already started with the tequila and she is looking at the jump elastic rope. If she gets in that thing we'll need to rent a rocket to look for her at the Moon!"

\- "I thought today was karaoke night."- said Sam.

\- "Actually there's a group playing later, but we can always get rid of them if you w

\- ant to sing."

\- "You're kidding, right?"

\- "All for my partner."

They sat on the table were Nell was trying to hide the tequila from Hetty.

\- "Ladies, gentlemen, welcome!" –Hetty saluted cheerfully – "I was about to start without you! C'mon, c'mon have a seat. Before we attack these nachos and guacamole I want to share with you a reflection that rounded me for some days now. These are days of joy, Christmas carols, gifts and celebrations; these are days to be with the family and the loved ones and these are days in which the absences are more present that the presences."- Hetty paused and looked around to the team, to the unconventional and loving family they were. - "This year we lost Michelle and Owen and nearly Mr. Callen."

\- "Too ornery to die."- Said Nell provoking some smiles.

\- "We are feeling an enormous emptiness that will never leave us. – Continued Hetty- "We are feeling the loss of two great people, two irreplaceable friends. And it hurts, because they were taken from us, they were our loved ones, because the love we feel for them cannot find its way out and the love we don't give turns into ice poking our insides and freezing our hearts. I propose something, a difficult exercise, indeed: let's turn the loss into celebration. Let's celebrate their time with us instead of mourning his absence today, let's give to the ones we have the love we used to share with them. Let's them be proud of us."- Hetty raised her glass unable to keep talking.

\- "For Michelle!"- said Sam standing up with his beer.

\- "For Granger!"- said Kensi moved.

G stood up and, looking around, he added:

\- "For us!"

They toasted solemnly and, when they sat, Hetty took the floor again:

\- "I was keeping it until the dessert, but I guess this moment is as good as any other. Along the years I've worked with hundreds of persons, I've personally trained teams and individuals with the hope that our sacrifice serves innocent people have a safer life. Some of them were good, some others even better and just a few were extraordinary."- She looked around fixing her stare in each one of them- "This team is more than that. As you know I came from Washington with one of the highest decorations this country could award for each one of you. Your outstanding courage and work made you for your own right worthy of it."- Hetty paused again, now the people around the table looked uncomfortable.-"What make you exceptional, ladies and gentlemen, is that every one of you refused the medal and five of you renounced to it in favor of another member of the team. Mr. Callen, please, accept this not as an award from your country, but as a gift from your team."

Callen stood up surprised, moved and embarrassed and accepted from Hetty a wooden frame with five crosses for distinguished service and an empty space where the other one should have been. Everybody started to clap and G took advantage to breathe deeply in the hope of getting rid of the lump on his throat.

\- "I… don't know what to say, guys… this is too much; I'm accepting only in behalf of all of you. We'll put it in the office as a symbol of the team, of my family, this is not mine, it's ours."

More clamps and whistles from Eric followed as G passed the frame to Sam and the others.

\- "Why you didn't keep yours Callen?" – Asked Kensi.

\- "It didn't match with my furniture."- He winked.

In spite of the emotional beginning the dinner flew by between laughs and jokes. It wasn't until the end that G could approach Hetty. He sat at her side staring at her with an unusual shy look in his blue eyes.

\- "I know that look Mr. Callen!"- She said.

\- "Definitely is the quote of the day."- Sighed G looking nervous and putting his head between his hands.

\- "You want something, but you don't know how to ask for it."

\- "You're right, but before asking, let me say that I'll understand if you don't want to."

\- "Want what exactly?"

\- "To celebrate Christmas tomorrow at my house. Garri… my dad is coming as well as Alex and the kid, but it won't be a real Christmas for me without you."-He said quickly before the fear prevented him to do so.

\- "I will be honored, my dear, thank you for the invitation."- She said proudly as Callen smiled happy and relieved- "I've just one condition."

G's heart sank and the fear of rejection came back.

\- "You're not cooking."- Hetty laughed making G the happiest person in the world.

She stood up and patting his short hair she murmured into his ear:

\- "Sam had just gone out to the beach; I guess he can use a friend right now."

\- "Thank you Hetty. For everything."

\- "My pleasure, Mr. Callen, my pleasure."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Somewhere in a little village on the East Coast a Michael Karl turned between his hands a small package that arrived earlier in the afternoon. Neither with his old nor his new identity he knew nobody who could send him a package. So he put the parcel on the Christmas tree and patiently waited until midnight. Once technically was Christmas day he opened it, even if it was a marketing thing it would be his only present. With the same illusion of a little child he carefully unwrapped the brown paper and took in his hands a beautiful velvet blue box. Certainly the company that had done this took his business seriously- He thought.

When he opened the box his hands started to shake and his eyes went full of tears. The Distinguished Service Cross shined in the beautiful case. A simple note explained everything.

\- "Thank you for your service."

Sargent Ben recognized the neat handwriting of his friend Carlson. Overwhelmed by emotion he stood at attention and, crying, gave salute to the cross.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

\- "It's beautiful here"- said G sitting at Sam's side admiring how the moonlight drew silver lines on the dark ocean.

The black sky decorated with shiny starts seemed to be a dome. From there the noise of the waves was nearly covering the music at the restaurant.

\- "Yeah…"

\- "You're thinking about Michelle."

\- "Someone gave you a crystal ball?"- Tried to banter Sam. As G didn't answer he added:

\- "It's hard, G. Sometimes is so hard that I have to think in a reason to keep on living."

\- "I know. I also lost her, but I can't even start to imagine how you feel. I know is a poor consolation, but you I'm here for you Sam."

\- "I know. Thanks buddy."

Taking his hand out of the pocket of his jacket Sam gave G a little box.

\- "Merry Christmas G."

\- "But… I have nothing for you! Really, you didn't have to, Sam!"- protested Callen.

\- "Open it."

G unwrapped the parcel to discover a watch very similar to the one that blew up in the explosion. Unconsciously he touched the scar on his wrist.

\- "Thank you Sam, it's great."

\- "Consider it a gift from Michelle. It was Kamran who chose it."

G smiled thinking about the little one and put the watch on. It was perfect. After a pause he added:

\- "Hetty was right about what she said before."

\- "Loss…"

\- "Loss, possession, love, celebration…"

\- "I don't know how to deal with loss, all my life I have focused on wining, I've never consider loosing. I don't know what is it or how to deal with it."- He looked at G and reading his expression he understood:

\- "But you do."

\- "I used to have a theory: If you own nothing you lose nothing. It worked for a while."- G gave a ship to his beer and looked at the horizon. - "Not anymore."

\- "So loss…"

\- "Loss is just the price, Sam. The price we pay for living."

THE END

And again thank you! :)


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